Sunday, December 31, 2006
New Yr Is Here!
hm.. told u peeps tat i will write a new yr resolution.. b4 tat.. lets cap hows my life have been..
This yr i find it more bad then gd.. first.. gd.. i found a lovely gal name xueqi.. bad.. i lost her.. haha..
2nd: i lost a gd friend name pouthy
3rd: i got lots of things spoilt n lost..
4th: my tempered turn bad.. n i am enlisted in army..
5th: n so on i don wish to continue..
ok.. gd part..
definately best part is having tis ex-gf of mine.. although i complaint alot n so.. i realised tat she been so supportive n be part of my life so so much.. but its too late when i realise.. lolz..
But however it is, thanks qi.. really thanks for all ur love n concern! although now its gone, gone to the worst tat u don even wish to contact me.. i jus hope u forgive me on wat i did.. some stuff i really did on panic.. Don punish me too long ya.. let me contact u!! reply? lolz.. take care!
having officers as friendly as my friend.. although they are demanding.. i don have the fear to talk to them.. jus like friends.. tat clear my loneliness when i got no friends at all..
yeap.. n angel.. thanks for coming back on ur holidays.. i had lots of fun.. without u.. i wont know how would i survive much when my broke up days.. haha..
N some of my friends being supportive even though u are busy.. don need to be name lahz k.. haha.. but thanks..
n one more.. who cant be named.. thanks for ur days for sacrificing ur time on me with ur care n concern. u should know who u are.. thanks .. but sorry tat i didnt treat u the way u wanted.. but now u are very happy.. i am glad.. take care. =)
Ok! NEW YR RESOLUTION!
Hope my life n luck gets better...
Hope someone willingly to answer my msges n calls.. u should know who u are!!
Hope i am able to study part time during my NS life..
Hope i can be promoted in my rank sooN!
Hope i able to get a car soon!
Hope to get friendships back like from Qi, Pouthy.
Hope my temper gets better..
Hope i able to travel out more!
Hope to be more healthy.. less health problem..
Hope to be able to be more practical.. less dreams.. wake up n do it..
Hope to be more successful n strong!
And last n most important! to be able to get love n love her back! Cause all i wan is love n care to n from someone i love.. =)
there are alot more lahz.. but cant think liaoz..
So Halley Sim here wishes all of u Happy new yr man!!
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/31/2006 11:02:00 PM|
Firstly:
Happy 18th Bday ridzuan!
Happy 25th Bday Jacelynn!
Happy 22th Bday Xue Hui!
All 3 on dec 30.
back! sorry about the post 2 days ago.. someone needed my help.. so i jus have to leave last min.. will talk about it later..
mon to fri..
mon: in camp.. tats all i think.. nothing special.. i cant remember.. i did leave camp.. ah nvm.. think after tat i went to buy earpiece for my mp3player.. thought spoilt.. amazingly it works again.. so from now been using it.. it treated me gd for now.. thanks to the special person who bought it for me.. thanks.. best prezzie i got for tis yr..
tue: went home early too.. go home early to watch pck lohz.. bored..
wed: half day for me man! all my bosses go play golf! lolz.. so i headed home.. guess wat.. parents not in.. i got left out of home.. no one wanna meet me.. even someone rather watch vcd lohz! ha.. so i went to changi village myself.. with the rain dropping on me since camp, took an hr or two to check out on fishing material.. got myself a new rod n reel.. some accessories.. broke! 50++ headed home.. waiting for my dad to come early for me.. was learning to tie the hook under my void deck.. lolz..
thurs: camp again! nothing much too.. bored.. same routine.. or simply.. i jus cant remember anything.. my mind was being bothered by something else... so after tat i stayed in.. adam joined me.. by den i wanted to blog.. but horx.. he been using it to read.. somethings.. haha.. so i cant do it.. blahz..
fri: busy! members of parliment came for meeting.. so i had to clean up the place.. den serve them.. blah blah blah.. i was so tired cause i haven been slping well.. even at home.. 3hrs of slp the most.. wanted to go home early.. but my major wanted me to stay.. asked in front of my boss.. piang.. how can i say no.. end up i waited.. he called.. ask me i can leave.. he's going the other side.. ok lohz.. blahz.. but i am happy for awhile tis week.. officers praise me.. even my boss! say i will have a gd future in the future.. but who knows.. it depends on me whether i gonna work hard.. i will try my best man! now jus waiting for my promotion.. think i am being forgotten by them.. my vocation still at seletar camp.. blahz.. n ya.. after tat i left.. got home.. alone.. mum went to work.. dad went to his club.. i got bored.. called ridzuan to go 201 for prata.. jess called me.. said tat she got trouble with gt.. so panick.. cried.. =X talk to her on the phone while i on the way to meet ridz.. den put down.. had prata.. basket the service getting worst.. n the cheese they change to kraftsingles tat kind! no more mozzarella?~! sadist.. after tat me n ridz chatted till sat.. his bday! haha.. he left.. i called jess n see the situation.. she shocked me by telling me she is at his place.. so i go over to help settle the problem.. solved.. its not my effort to solve the problem.. its jus a misscomunication between them.. she got panicked.. after tat i head home to rest..
sat: rushing my stuff the whole morning n afternoon to prepare the stuff i needed to give away.. thanks for some peeps to help.. although i didnt give it personally.. as least she received it.. head to double-o for jacelynn bday.. not bad.. retro nite.. music was gd.. drinks is gd.. i had quite a few.. but i think i wasnt drinking it leisurely.. some should know wat i mean.. anyway i was the youngest there.. lolz.. left at 2am.. jacelynn was dead drunk.. sushan sent me home.. thanks! will post photos when its been sent to me.. i kinda had fun.. cause i didnt really have to think of much..
sun: today.. nothing.. its eve.. not in the festive mood totally.. so gonna stay at home.. n ya.. gonna write my resolutions later.. cya!
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/31/2006 05:26:00 PM|
Saturday, December 30, 2006
| You Are Apple Red |
You're never one to take life too seriously, and because of it, you're a ton of fun.
And although you have a great sense of humor, you are never superficial.
Deep and caring, you do like to get to the core of people - to understand them well.
However, any probing you do is light hearted and fun, sometimes causing people to misjudge you. |
| Your Seduction Style: Sweet Talker |
Your seduction technique can be summed up with "charm"
You know that if you have the chance to talk to someone...
Well, you won't be talking for long! ;-)
You're great at telling potential lovers what they want to hear.
Partially, because you're a great reflective listener and good at complementing.
The other part of your formula? Focusing your conversation completely on the other person.
Your "sweet talking" ways have taken you far in romance - and in life.
You can finess your way through any difficult situation, with a smile on your face.
Speeding tickets, job interviews... bring it on! You truly live a *charmed life* |
| The Movie Of Your Life Is A Cult Classic |
Quirky, offbeat, and even a little campy - your life appeals to a select few.
But if someone's obsessed with you, look out! Your fans are downright freaky.
Your best movie matches: Office Space, Showgirls, The Big Lebowski |
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/30/2006 06:20:00 PM|
Friday, December 29, 2006
yeah.. i am back! after 5 days of disappearance! been going to camp..
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/29/2006 09:35:00 PM|
Sunday, December 24, 2006
jus wanna do a quick post today as its gonna be xmas soon.. don wanna spoil the festive mood on the very day.. so i may as well write it now.. cause i feel tat if i don open up.. i will feel damn horrible the whole day tml which i am hoping not to.
slept 3-4hrs in the nite.. although msn setting asleep.. me watching tv reading forum.. lolz.. woke up at 7 am to prepare to meet Adam for fishing.. blahz.. so early.. saw huiwen(pizza city colleague) in the train.. chatted n i dropped myself at kallang mrt to wait for Adam.. waited 30mins.. blahz.. been so long since i waited someone so long.. 4-5months? ha.. memories.. bad but i guess i deserve it. to remember in the future i jus have to be more patience.. esp to a gal or someone important. =) well.. anyway adam tried getting more fishing hooks for me as i got none.. don know hiding where in my storeroom.. shopped close.. so we jus have to head on. drop at marina bay mrt. took a bus to marina south pier.. lolz..
i was wearing WHITE 3/4 pants.. cause i don have black one.. n a light polo-t. tried black at first.. i took it out immediately.. i don know why.. i started to hate wearing black.. especially those newbie one tat i got. thought of giving it away already.. lolz.. wanna know why? i guess some of u know why.. don know one ask me lohz.. haha.. give u a clue.. its been 4-5months since i last wore black polo.. cause someone simply hate it especially NEWBIES one.. lolz.. ok.. so i didnt know the condition is at the rocky place. jialat.. anyway.. we prepare.. all use short rods.. mine abit longer n stronger.. not suitable for the fish we gonna fish.. those small small ones lahz.. like nasi lemak fish u know? lolz.. my first throw was gd.. got a few being biten.. but one of my hooks stuck at the rock! so.. u peeps should know.. line break.. force break it.. some of u may think i am joking.. take it as leave it.. lolz.. so bo pian.. adam have to make.. while making.. i used his.. caught fishes.. den again almost gonna stuck at the rock.. so i scare later he gonna make another.. i moved forward.. slipped n fell.. my ass got a flower.. my left hand got cuts.. sigh.. jus 5mins i got everything.. pants dirty.. shirt dirty.. think all of u know i cannot tahan my shirt being pull or my clothes being dirty.. but tis is the life..
as we continue.. i broke 2 lines in total.. after tat starting to get used to it.. adam was like cant believe i fish b4.. but hello! tats like in psch? sigh.. i admit i jus like a newbie.. its a blessing tat he can tahan me although some remarks he make is kinda heartless.. but tats him.. its already nice enough for him to ask me out.. if not i don know how am i gonna suffer on tis xmas EVE. we fished till almost 1.. as adam's cheap rod spoilt.. thrown.. lolz.. think i gonna buy new rod n reel too.. small ones like his.. sensitivity is so important.. wanted to take a cab back as i was dirty.. with wounds.. n fishy smell.. den Adam say wanted to go buy the stuff today.. so in the end.. took the train.. reach halfway he say next time.. diao.. so with me being dirty n smelly.. i dropped at simei n walk home..
came back.. did some unpacking.. some washing.. n leave the rest for dad.. i had my bath.. dress my wound.. lunch.. went to slp.. till evening.. den nothing to do liaoz.. watching tv.. doing nothing in the eve.. lots of thoughts in my mind.. but i may need to do 1 open comment of mine.. i cannot tahan.. my rage is jus too selfish for me to consider the feeling of the particular someone.. i hate to say it out.. i jus have to..
nvm.. i deleted it.. i cant do it. tats all. cya.
merry xmas everybody.
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/24/2006 11:04:00 PM|
Saturday, December 23, 2006
I am back! finally blogging.. didnt wanted to blog at camp anymore cause lazy... haha.. plus tiring.. today is the 3rd day.. sat.. finally out of camp.. lets jus talk abt my camp life abit..
rain rain n rain.. after tat it stop weather suddenly turn so hot.. lighting strike my block once.. windows tremble.. power source n phone line got short-circuited.. took them 4-5hrs to get the power back.. 1.5days to get my phone line back.. during tat moment.. i jus have to use my hp... blahz.. is misery.. i stayed in camp.. slept 2 different bunks.. didnt slp well.. always stay in mess late.. i don know wat i am doing actually.. but was online in msn though.. so actually chatted with some of u.. lolz.. my boss(ltc) is nice.. i forgot to buy some stuff for my stayover.. he asked me list down n he go buy.. lolz.. piang.. he really make my day sometimes.. i still don understand him though.. sometime he seems so nice.. but sometimes seems so demanding.. its hard to know him.. dad called me when i was in camp.. guess wat? for internet.. blahz.. how nice.. told him to on the modem will do.. he on my freaking computer cause he thought is link when i told him its not when he asked! really pissed me off..
fri morning.. was talking to a Major after tat a LTC.. both talk to me abt life.. i think its so true.. i been sticking at one place not moving while i see ppl being so practical n so far.. i cannot keep sticking on my logic of i don study at home cause i don wanna stress myself like how other ppl is being faced n ended up their character change to bad. i really need to be practical to see my future.. not by dream n not doing it.. although i was talking to my LTC about oversea posting.. he straights away rejected me n told me the reasons.. ok i will take it.. at least he said tat i am doing a gd job here.. i find it a really gd talk.. makes me change my prospect.. i jus have to plan my time well tis time.. n hope i got the will n heart to do it..
back home! finally.. manage to leave early.. darn happy.. but reach home sian liaoz.. don know why.. i don have the mood for everything.. see my dad even worst.. rot at home.. read newspaper.. surf the darn internet everytime.. even talk to my mum abt car.. reminded her tat when i was in seletar camp she did mention of buying.. now she denials.. lolz.. my dad.. i jus say him go find a freaking part time job instead of rotting at home if not go study computer course, cause he was talking to me abt computer parts as if he knows.
today.. worst.. of all mood.. sunday.. xmas eve is coming.. a day i suppose to look forward to.. now.. i simply hate it.. didnt wanted to look forward too.. but meetin one of my officer for fishing since my long waiting for program been cancelled by ME myself n i.. its not my will but i jus have to do it.. so face the result.. =) dad went to collects zanne stuffs.. came back with the carrot cake tat bought from enuos.. suppose to be nice.. but its not tat nice today.. i ate half.. n went to slp... woke up.. looking for it.. he ate it.. cause he thought i don wan.. i simply HATE HIM NOW. all he do is thought thought.. u thought i think who confirm?! fuck up man.. he knows tat mum cooks lots of food for lunch n dinner.. yet he going to aunt's bday side to eat.. so wat.. left me to eat lahz.. now have to clear food.. ME ME ME.. always me? cant he jus eat mum's cooking instead of eating my carrot cake?! at least i got choice for lunch n dinner instead of eating both da same! really spoils my day.. elder sis another one.. ask me go bedok for turkey dinner. i don wan.. so she came up with idea of fetching me i still say no.. so i jus say if u wan can send it to my place.. she was like cannot lahz.. rushing for home. damn excuses.. if u wanna fetch me there. obviously u will have to fetch me back. cant u jus bring the freaking food here so ur parents can also have the share? tis is how i see selfish in life, i didnt expect to see tat obvious from my family TO ME. seriously got disgusted.
i cant get it.. i not even looking forward for xmas.. new yr.. things happened.. causes me to be like tis.. sigh.. how to be strong! time will tell? i scare i not enough time.. wateva.. i jus stop here.. cause too depressing.. u all read le also will sian.. jus take it as. Halley's life jus turned into a disaster.
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/23/2006 06:30:00 PM|
Thursday, December 21, 2006
This post is nothing but just a confession.. Cause the last conversation we had. really too much miscommunication, as my anger came.. yours came after. Some of u maybe confused who the "yours" i am talking about.. some of u may know.. But the most important thingy.. u should know who u are if u read tis post even thought i asked u to stop reading my blog. I actually felt so bad i called myself a "bastard" when i msn u. This word "bastard".. is a word i hate.. whenever ppl mention tat word to me or to someone else.. i will use stern/harsh tone to warn them not to use tis word.. or maybe even threaten them with violence.. ppl who know me should know i don like tat word. so i hope u understand how serious was i n how serious tis confession is..
The reason i ask u to stop reading cause i will definitely be depress after parting with u.. i even ask to break up friendship with u for awhile.. it really kills me.. but if i don do tat.. i don know how to make it alive out there anymore.. i really need sometime to take up my composure back in order to be like a gentleman again.. i don wanna be a low-down man who keep begging u for forgiveness.. cause its definitely too late.. u said it urself.. i admitted my fault too late.. but u don know tat along i know i have not been doing the right thing.. as in how should i treat u.. how should i tell u.. or things u wanna hear n hope for me to do.. but how u wan me to say it to u when i feel tat it wont be trueful? i really don know how to explain to u.. but all the while the guilt is in me.. in my blood.. i am an introvert.. i don tell my problems out even to my very very best friend.. cause i don have the face to tell anyone. or because of my honoR? family honOR? i for darkest secret tat no one else know but me. who knows.. now i really don know how to tell u how i feel. how remorseful i am of wat i should do n should not do. but like u said its too late.. Sry is a word tat we been using lately.. seems no use.. but i don know any other way to apologise to u.. i owe u too much.. i owe everyone too much.. to me i find myself a lost person who u all think got lots of potential in life, but like jessica(syas) said. i got too many questions to be answered.. So lastly.. i only can say sorry.. its really a great lost tat i lost u.. u will neva know how much it mean to me not to lost another person. 3 person in a roll.. how big blow it can be? but who can i blame? HALLEY SIM is to be blame.. so pls take care.. u know wat i wan u to take care.. stay happy with him.. n u can contact me if u need help or anything.. God bless! love ya! =) U will be missed.
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/21/2006 12:33:00 AM|
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
hm... here am i again.. got surprised anot? i actually blog everyday.. haha.. well.. today stuck in camp.. so why not jus blog.. since there's nothing much i can do here..
well.. lets start.. hell of a tired morning i had... nearly couldnt wake up.. wished i could slp more.. 1 reason is cause i am tired.. the other reason.. as long i am awake.. i wil think.. think of things.. n esp ppl.. its immediate.. n i mean once i woke up.. not even my eyes open i will start thinking.. efficient anot? i think it is efficient.. but the wrong way.. cause at the same time it feels normal.. the next moment can be torturous.. don ask me why.. cause i am an introvet.. i keep things to myself.. unless u got clearance on tat.. haha..
travelling was tiring esp with tis rain.. tried slping.. cant.. i don get it.. i jus cant slp in buses.. unless i am heading home.. tats why i was darn tired i think.. plus my leg still hurts from tat stupid knock.. sigh.. but one thing today.. i kinda like my dressing today.. lolz.. especially with my black jacket.. seems like a half casual dress.. with tat jacket seems like a professional! lolz.. love it! but the wrong bag though.. brought a nike bag instead.. haha..
kinda busy today.. at least its better then yesterday.. busy.. so i wont think much.. but sadly.. i did.. i think i am nuts today.. or too emo.. for one minute i can like be optimistic about things happened.. the very next moment i am sad like mad.. even i can feel my heart turn hour.. it happened thru out today.. even the bus journey i had.. arghz.. i don know how long i gonna be able to tahan..
am i really ok? or i got spilt personality? the feeling is so horrible.. even thought i opened up.. speak wat i wanna say.. i don bear to lose anything anymore.. i lost too much yet i have to continue losing another important being.. am i able to do it? i don think i can.. seems so suffering! how can! so unfair! or is it punishment cause i neva take ACTION..? must action really speak louder den words sometimes? its a correct logic.. but does everyone really do it? really mean it? n den why they are given chances but not me? haiz.. depressing post.. i seriously hate it.. n ya.. who likes a depressing post anyway.. lolz..
oh ya.. i got a question to u peeps to answer.. two person got together... in love.. after sometimes of quarreling.. u two got sick.. n one wans to break up.. while the other one trying to save it..even spend the effort.. but yet the other party starting to think its irritating.. why would tis happen? chemical reaction fail? or wat? tell me! cause it happened to me all da time! lolz..
n ya!! yesterday NITE.. most dramatic of my life.. i left camp.. rush to get a prezzie.. didnt manage to get whole set. rush to a place to delivered it.. with rain showering on me.. lolz.. the stuff was so called "delivered".. by den i was soaking wet.. till whole body drenched.. leaping.. walking on the rain.. really makes me think alot.. lolz.. reach home.. even more ENCOURAGING! my dad opens the door for me.. first question: did u bring the laptop back? 2nd sentence: fix up the system. WTF!! i am home soaking wet.. yet u ask abt laptop? am i the human being or wat? how should i feel? i got tis kind of treatment for PUTTING IN EFFORT like wat ppl wants.. even thought its late.. my thailand tripped got cancel.. my dad cares about laptop more den me.. WTF!!! sigh.. sadist.. i wonder how many sadness i must go thru tis yr.. get me anesthesia!!
recently the rain really suits me.. suits my mood so much.. the feeling of sudden calmness n den.. sudden of downpour(sadness).. really suits my mood alot.. feels as if "the toP" knows my feelings.. the feeling of calmness.. optimistic.. den suddenly breakdown moment! ha.. really suits me so much..
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/19/2006 06:57:00 PM|
Monday, December 18, 2006
been so long since i ever posted.. didnt had the will to post.. n its always demoralising post.. so i thought maybe i should give up posting.. but now in camp nothing to do.. so may as well post..
for the past 3 weeks.. life's been quite predictable.. predictably bad.. i down with flu,fever,sore throat, nose infection cum bleed n muscle ache for 2weeks.. n very bad headaches.. cause from pain from other sickness.. it really felt horrible.. pain killers had been my friends.. wonder when will i be immune to them.. to some of ya who will say try not to eat tat much.. its not i wanna eat de! doc ask me eat one.. i even cut down the dosage myself.. hehe.. even till now my nose stills have not recovered.. gone abit worst actually.. but wat can i do.. seems nothing i can do about it.. allegy to dust.. -.-"" thanks to army..
n ya.. other stuff.. everything seems normal.. as usual being demoralise by family.. no trust.. rarely hang out with friends now.. either camp or stayed at home.. life has turn into an schedule.. wanted to watch so much movies.. but don seem to have a chance.. only once.. thanks to poon i manage to watch dejavu.. tats the only show i manage to watch.. suppose to watch with someone else thought.. but i think got into a miscommunication between me n her.. so i am sorry if u actually waited for me.. i remembered u told me u said ok to another person tat u watching with him.. so i went ahead..
hm.. wat else can i write here.. i absolutely don know.. i am feeling lost.. i don know wat am i doing.. am i cherishing myself anot? cause it sems like i am not cherishing ppl who to me i cherished but no actions done.. or even myself.. who am i? wat am i? am i alive or i jus turn totaly retarded? everybody seems to be doing things with an aim.. but me? i cant find an aim.. i lost my patience n temper again.. n i mean AGAIN.. am i really able to turn back the old me? to able to tahan.. even thought when i felt the thing is wrong.. or i am not in the wrong but got scolded.. am i able to?! well.. lets find out when i gonna try again to adjust myself...
TO someone u should know who u r..:
i know i been upsetting u alot.. or accidentally hurt u.. not really physically but it did "dirty" ur stuff or u abit.. i really didnt mean it.. i meant well.. but somehow things jus didnt goes well.. i have not shown the care tat i once shown u.. i realised tat along n u showed patience till now.. u lost ur patience.. ur faith to me.. i wont blame u but myself.. but i really hope tat u can give me time to adjust.. to be better.. not back to the square 1 of my past.. in fact.. i not even sure u will be reading tis cause i have not blog for a long long time.. i think i say all these maybe too late.. but it better be late den neva.. i hurted u too muh.. i upset u too much.. i am jus hoping u to give me time to adjust.. but if u think leaving our own ways u will be happier.. pls tell me instead of running away from me.. i will.. sadly.. but let u go..
[[~firecomet~]]|Sad @ 12/18/2006 04:37:00 PM|
