the pain i must endure

Dear Bloggie...

Damn I hate NAPHA test. NAPHA, NOT NAFA. sheesh.  -.-

Hello all! =]

Let's just jump straight in...

I got three warning letters in one day!

How awesome is that? woooo...

My attendance suck, so what, I'm graduating soon anyway...

Anyways...

The past week has been pretty exhausting...

Yesterday went for band prac which I didn't need to be there...

Stayed anyway to kill time..

At night had LMP meeting...

Had dinner at mac first then we proceeded with the meeting...

So LMP is gonna be on 16th and 17th March...

Looking forward to it...

Next week I've got Alumni meeting at NAS...

Hope to see new faces...

NAPHA test on Thursday...

Did as much stretching as possible...

First station was sitNreach, I sucked like mad. No flexibility at all...Failed.

Next was sit ups, self explanatory, A...

Next was Standing Broad Jump, THE MAT SUCKS! Super slippery, FREAK! Failed.

Next was Shuttle Run, A...

Next was Pull ups, E...

Lastly, 2.4km... Out of 6 rounds, I managed to complete 5 rounds cause it was already at 12mins, no point continuing... Failed.

And now my muscles are freaking cramped, I can barely walk, I pulled my whole body up the freaking stairs yesterday to go band...

Like I'm paralysed or something... Which is the reason I didn't go band today... Not like I'm needed...

Johnathan told me about sectionals, I'm just...watever...

Ok so Wednesday went for lesson in the morning but the cher wasn't there, BUMMER.

So went for early lunch...

After that went to the library, borrowed the Mulan II DVD and watched till 1pm...

Went to CSW class..

After that went to meet FYP lecturer...

Next Tuesday my group is gonna be interviewed by the co-examiner for FYP...

Do I have to talk about Tuesday?

Cause there's nothing to talk about...

So yar...

That's it.

My violin teacher sms-ed me today...

She told me she's buying my violin today...

So that means by next week I'll be getting my violin!

Awesome, been looking forward to that since before this year started...

Being alone isn't that bad actually...

The thing that sucks is knowing the world is against you...

But it's ok, good shall prevail...Not that I'm good or anything...

Instead, I suck. So yea...

Watch out world, a sucker is gonna make it big someday, *cracks up*

Ok nonsense...

I'm talking to myself more often then not...

Which is a habit I stopped when I was surrounded with people to talk to...

Now that I'm back to square one, it happens again...

If you can't talk to someone else, you can always talk to yourself right?

I'm just spouting nonsense after nonsense...

The freaking chinese new year celebrations under my void deck better stop before 10pm...

Cause they are freakin loud and distracting...

The karaoke singing sucks, why not just put a pre-recorded disc or something...

I'm angry, yes...

But I'm ignorant, so yea, forgive my manners please...

I'm off..

Bybyez.

*Freakin cramps...*

Zupz Zupz!

just gonna be happy for my best friend

Dear Bloggie...

Cause she deserves my whole hearted support.

Hello all! =]

Gosh, ok, I haven't blog for ages...

Sorry for that...

And I dunno where to start also...

It's been, a very busy few weeks...

Been going out quite often also...

I owe them that much cause I haven't been going out with them...

So yar...

Ok let's just try to recall stuff which...I might remember...

Music Theory Grade 5 Exam results...

I dunno what I'm supposed to feel to be honest..

Before getting the results, all I know was that I passed...

For some, passing would be a joyful thing...

But you know I'm weird and such... My piano cher sms-ed to tell me I passed...

And I asked her "Pass only?"

Her reply was "Then u want fail ar?"

So I just... Felt very sad...

Then the next day I went to take my results...

Half felt a sense of anticipation, half felt a sense of disappointment...

Then when I was handed my results, and saw "98" written there...

I didn't know what to feel, I wanted to be happy, but I was confused...

*like how I'm confused right now, but that's not important*

So till when I got my results till now, I don't know what I'm supposed to feel...

Schoolwise...

Mostly focused now on projects...

And lab test...

Shitz, I haven't studied yet...

Been slacking the past few days...

Hmmmm....

Ferrero Roche is very nice...

Hmmmm....

Oh, I've been spending the whole day alone today...

And been sleeping alone at home for the past 2 nights...

Of course it's been lonely...

But I guess that's how it's gonna be when you're all alone huh fiq...

It's ok, I'll get through this alone...

Cause I'm strong! Rawrs!

heh, who am I try'na kid...

On the other hand, who cares too...

Be it win-win or lose-lose situation, it doesn't really matter...

It's inevitable...

Friends come and go...

Others come back cause they have something they want from you, and they disappear again...

It's a vicious cycle, a way of life....

Deal with it...

Can see my thoughts are random huh...

Speaking of random...

I've been eye-ing on this phone..

Nokia 5800 Express Music...

I even dream about it yesterday night...

Gosh I'm obsessed with that phone...=X

One day I shall get that phone...one day...

Sometimes I think my life is kinda sad...

In search of truth, one will only find hurt...

But the hurt is just an obstacle towards uncovering the whole picture...

That small steps of courage towards an endless race towards the finish...

Sometimes just doesn't make any sense or has any direction...

We just do what seems right to us despite our surroundings...

Venting angers, hiding tears, triumphant of victories...

But we don't see what we've gained from them...

Those endless amounts of memories and experience...

What did we gain?

I thought we were close...

And there wasn't anyone who's closer to you than me...

I tried to believe all this was true...

But forgive me for having doubts about you...

Being the Amiable that I am...

All I want is the happiness of others and the best for all relations...

Sometimes at the cost of my own...

But it's ok...

I shouldn't take it too personally...

You've grown, you have your own mindset, your own set of values...

Who am I to say what you should or shouldn't do...

All I can do is support you...

My best friend, are you truly my best friend?

Or is there some other secrets that you hide from me...

Not that I want to pry open, but I thought it's only mutual?

Maybe our mindsets were never the same from the start...

Maybe...maybe...may....be...

All I can do is hope... hope you're being true...

It's true that what is not asked, is not answered...

But I'm too afraid to ask, so I won't...

So much for being the social specialist...

Awesome...

I'm a wreck all by my own accord...

Oh well...

It will blow over me I guess...

So that's all for now...

Take care people!

Oh and...

Happy Chinese New Year. =]

Good nightz and sweet dreamz!

*Let me be...*

Zupz Zupz!

i'll go bonkers without you

Dear Bloggie...

A reflection of a reflection.

Hello all! =]

Gosh it's been awhile...

*nods*

I realise that blogging everyday would result to boring entries from me...

Which totally goes against me trying to make my entries more lively...

Hmmmm...*thoughts in progress*

Ok so basically...

The world is starting to show signs of PMS through the temperature...

It's very VERY windy nowadays, kinda feels like the kinda wind speed on a cruise ship...

I've still yet to find wind speeds which could literally make me fly, till then, I shall stick to flying on a plane...

Hah, I got back my MST test papers back...

And as expected, not so good news...

Won't be revealing the results, but, just know when I say it's bad, it's really bad...

But on the other hand, my Lab tests are amazingly awesome...

With nearly full marks for all my modules...

What can I say, I'm a hands on kinda guy, heh, kinky...

Gawd, I haven't updated for a week already?

That's sad...

Last week was just...

Stupid + Disappointments + a new low...

I finally realise that I'm more of a liability then an asset to NASband's commitee...

With this realisation, I'm gonna be less involved with their decisions/plans/screw-ups...

I've had enough...

Not gonna elaborate even further, cause I'm gonna concentrate on the euphos...

So that means, only sectionals...

I'll probably leave or not come for combines...

Just be a normal alumni, cause I think I suck at doing that...

A new year and we're already heading for rock bottom...

Isn't life just so amazing sometimes...

We try so hard to help and we get insulted...

A person once told me, "We can lead the horse to the river, but it doesn't mean the horse will drink"...

True, the horse isn't thirsty enough...

Always bloated and so full of itself...

I'm done caring for a band that's so selfish...

Must be the biggest thing I regret most now...

Should've ditched this band long ago...

Should've pursued my own life through SPband...

I am such an idiot...

But that's gonna change...

I'm gonna help those who appreciates and benefits from it...

To those who don't give a damn, just stop reading...

On the flipside...

I can see my eupho juniors improving at a faster rate...

Despite James and Terrence taking turns coming for band...

Jaslyn is constantly improving, but still needs to remember MORE AIR...

So I must say that I'm proud of the eupho section...

Afew weeks left till SYF, hopefully they'll make it...

I am so consumed with band stuff...

I rarely have a life anymore...

Should stop thinking of band too much...

And start focusing on what's most important to me...

Luckily I'm not alone...

I've got friends, BEST friend, and family to listen to me...

So thanks for all the support, really appreciate it...

Well then, I've blogged today...

Maybe I'll blog tomorrow...

Speaking of tomorrow...

There's LMC meeting...

The group of people I can trust to appreciate my existence...=]

First meeting for the year...

Hopefully Andrew has everything planned out...

Can see he's quite stressed out about it, but hey, he's not alone...

There's all 12 of us to back him up!

Alrighty then...

Take carez everyone!

Good nightz and sweet dreamz!

And, please don't be afraid to be alone, cause I'll always be around...=]

*I need my psychiatrist, asap.*

Zupz Zupz!

and when the dust settles

Dear Bloggie...

Addicted to rice crackers. hur..

Hello all! =]

I had a really really messed up day today...

I shouted at the older nephew and the younger nephew cried...

And I really mean, SHOUT.

I think I'm starting to stand up and actively participating in family matters, that's good..

Anyhoo..

On with the day...

Woke up at around 6am...

And I swear my body clock was as confused as it could ever be...

I thought it was 6pm or something...

Went back to bed and woke up again at 10am...

Had breakfast and went into my "workplace"...actually it's my room...

So I started Photoshop program and went to some websites to do research...

Got a couple of nice pictures I can use for my design...

Research more and when I think I had enough...

I got down to business... heh, sounds so serious...

Photoshop aint that difficult once you've played around with it...

The hard part is getting the ideas to flow from your head to the comp...

So I did that for dunno how many hours...

Till I eventually landed on facebook...

And started playing Bowling Buddies...

Mr Lim, Joseph Lim...

Challenged me to afew games...

Which I ignored due to time contraint...

And I replied his challenge and beat him in all four...

Maybe it was just my pure dumb luck or something, but it was a win...=]

Yup...

I have nothing else to talk about today...

Still thinking when I should get my 12 bucks baton from Yamaha...

Maybe when I'm outside and happen to stumble upon there then I'll get it...

When school starts, everyone gets busy...

I'm the one who gets bored...

And it kinda sucks...

Cause no one's talking to me...

And I have no idea if the friends I made actually know of my existence when I don't talk to them...

It's like I'm invisible or something...

Haiz...

Hate this sense of loneliness, freak.

I so agree with Murphy's Law nowadays...

Which states that anything that could go wrong, will go wrong...

How true it could be...

Nevermind...

If people want me to be alone, I shall be alone...

What's worse that could happen in doing so...

Nothing.

So yea...

Thanks for reading.

Take care.

Bybye.

*The lack of, no, the Absence of social cohesion.*

Zupz Zupz!

what's the point.

Dear Bloggie...

I just wanna be happy again.

Hello all! =]

Ok...

Will be damn short...

Monday, went to Esplanade to return books/scores...

And borrowed two more books...

Wanted to borrow The King and I VCD, but not available...

Gonna hunt for it as soon as it's available...

Muahahaa... First time I watched it was during music lesson in Sec 1...

So after going Esplanade, went to school for lesson..

Was late for like 15 mins or something like that...

Did some revision on writing letter or something...

And ended at 6pm...

Went home blah blah...

Today...

Woke up at around 10am...

Took after the nephews...

Mum cooked while I looked after the kids...

At around 2.30pm, went for band...

Played some songs from the book I borrowed yesterday...

Then Germaine conducted warm up, though the way she hold the baton abit weird...

Should teach her someday...

Then we had combined for kokomo, and we had to go out for awhile cause one part the eupho-trombone cannot play...

So I taught them slowly...

And when they came back in the room, the eupho played well, mr yeo was surprised...

Woo yea! Fiqz did his job right for once...

MR YEO NOT COMING TOMORROW!

But Ms Leong coming! yay.

Tomorrow...

The only thing I'm gonna do is...

Go for band, play eupho, grab sec 1s, go home.

Sounds super boring...

I know...

hur...

Ok that's all for today...

Wow I'm actually blogging...hah...

Take carez everyone!

Good nightz and sweet dreamz!

*You're growing up, some sacrifices were made in the process, but it's ok.*

Zupz Zupz!

responsibilities build-up

Dear Bloggie...

A sight for sore eyes.

Hello all! =]

Okok...

I didn't blog regularly, my bad...

The reason for doing so, is quite legitimate...

I was lazy.

Told ya.

Ok...

It's the new year!

I'm late for like 4 days or something, sheesh...

Alright, stop poking me already...

HAPPY NEW YEAR, belated.

Hmmmm....

I was actually bored during the time it struck 12am on 1st Jan...

Seriously...

Many people weren't online, I was supposed to be out with friends, but for some reason something came up...

And I was stuck at home, such a bummer...

Instead I spent the time watching Power Rangers movie, a vcd I bought earlier in the day...

Went to TM with Syuhaidah cause she wanted to get some movies...

Was kinda long since I met her...

She treated me sweets at Mini Toons at TM cause I accompanied her...

So that's for that Wednesday...

On new year's day...

I have no idea what I was doing...

OH!

Went to ECP driving range for golf with salihin and alfi...

I simply sucks at golf, seriously...

I miss the ball completely like dunno how many thousand times...

*But I didn't threw the club away like one of my friend did! hah! =X*

So we had dinner at Banquet at Parkway Parade...

Went home and selpt cause there was sch on friday...

Friday morning, woke up damn early, bathed...

Went to school...

I dunno, it was quite mundane to me...

After sch, went home, den went Friday Prayers...

Had lunch with Assiddiq, Faris and Johnathan...

Johnathan was sms-ing SOMEONE all the time...=X

After lunch, went home, packed my bags, played game on my comp...

Realise how I'm not really replying on MSN lately? Cause no one bothers talking to me anymore...

And when I start talking, no one really bothers to reply back...

So I'd rather play games...

More productive, in some sense...

At 6.30pm, went to school for Alumni Camp...

Meeting with Mdm Lee and the other Alumnis started at 7.30pm...

Went on till about 11.30pm...

I was named the Creative Director of the commitee...=]

At 12am, we watched Ah Long Pte Ltd...

All the way till 2am...

After which we went down to the canteen to watch Epic Movie...

Till about 4am...

And played soccer for awhile...

5am went to sleep...

HUI HUI SLEPT ON THE SOFA! =X rawrs.

I landed myself on the floor, luckily there's the rug...

Woke up at around 7am...

Walked around the school till about 9am...

Had breakfast...

10.30am, meeting with principal Mr Adrian Lim...

Talked to him about some stuff till around 11am...

Went back home to bathe...

And went back out to TM to have lunch with everyone else...

Then went home, to SLEEP.

All the way from that time till about 2pm today...

My existence was temporarilly lost...

Went out with mom and dad today...

And that's it...

Ok...

Seems like I typed alot...

Brain still not functioning actually, so yar...

Tuesday having band, Afiq wants to follow, hopefully Jaslyn could follow and use MORE AIR...

Wednesday is the Sec 1 thingy, Mr Yeo better come...

Tomorrow going esplanade library at 3pm to return back scores and going back sch at 4pm for CSW make-up lessons...

So that's it!

Sorry for the awesomely boring entry for the start of the new year...

Won't promise next would be better, my mood now is damn shitty...hah...

Somehow I can't wait to graduate so I can have time for other stuff...

Ok, take carez everyone!

May you stay true to your new year's resolutions!

*You have him, you don't need me anymore~*

Zupz Zupz!