Dear Bloggie...

Yea, I'm back again, I guess...
I was just thinking...
About how sad my band life is...
I've always thought my band life was one happy one...
But looking back another time, I realise its quite pathetic...
Yea I had fun, yea I made friends and loved my instrument...

But why does it always have to be me...
Why do I have to miss all the fun stuff?
I didn't open my big mouth then...
Why?
Cause I didn't know I could be so commited...
But now that I feel that I'm more commited...
I start to question the higher athority then...
Maybe you can ask me why I'm saying all this...
Maybe you can call me an idiot...
But I've silenced myself for too long...

The thing is...
The moment I joined band...
I knew I wanted to do something big...
BE SOMEBODY.
But I waited...
Fair enough, in sec 3 I became the QM...
Stock checking stuff and making sure everyone gets what they needed and all...
You can say I was satisfied...
But I knew I was capable of something bigger...
Then in sec 4...
My body was so prepared for the big one...
Only to be disappointed...
For getting advisor...
I mean, come on...
ADVISOR?
What's the use of an advisor when he's trained as a QM?
I was sad, who wouldn't...
Imagine you really wanted something and just get ignored...
The word for it is PATHETIC...

Why am I so angry?
Cause as an advisor, it was an insignificant post...
One where you're never important...
One where you're not needed most of the time...
again I ask...WHY?
Cause the teachers are the advisors...
I mean like COME ON...
Student Advisors???
The trend I see these days...
Those who are advisors are as good as those normal members...

And I was told...
Of a PATHETIC reason...
Why I was the advisor...
Cause I had N levels that year...
It's not like I'm FLUNKING MY SUBJECTS RIGHT?!
I'm always above average in everything, either that or better...
I can still remember taking the N level papers and laughing infront of it...
Call me crazy, but it was easy as pie...
And the people UP THERE that time wasn't much commited now...
Maybe it's just some tradition that they just lose interest just like that...
But still, I don't see them around, not even once...

All their TRAINING of being what they are...
JUST WENT TO WASTE...
You know how painful that is to me?
The suffering of knowing that it could be you going through those training...
To improve on yourself...
For the leadership skills that you could have gained through it...
and NO, it HAD TO BE THEM...
It's time people start looking LONG TERM...
So what if they can lead the band now...
Or even while they have that post...
It's about what they can give you when they have graduated...

The only person I look up to...
Though I don't usually say it...
Is Ng Geck Woon...
She's the one with leadership skills beyond that of any humans I know of...
And I still see her around...
Looking at the band...
Helping out in some ways or another...
THAT is called commitment...
Fair enough, you can say that I can't expect everyone to be like her...
Everyone has got their own commitments...
True...
But like I said, it's FREAKING PAINFUL to just see those leaders who just disappear...
Call me selfish, I don't care...
Hate me and think that I'm the worst person on earth...
I've never said anything cause I was afraid...
Afraid that people might think I'm not logical...
That I'm asking for too much...
SO WHAT if I'm asking for too much?
Is asking for commitment too much?
IZZIT?!

I've just been silent...
Screaming inside me...
Do you know how it feels...
When people ask you..
If you've gone to NCO camp or not...
If you're trained...
If you're good enough to be a leader...
If you've got the commitment...
And you tell them you didn't go for the camp...
And they just don't care about you just cause of that...
And it's not their fault you see...
There's no point pointing fingers here and there too...
Cause what's done is done...
Now I can only busk in my ignorance and scream deep within...
No one will know how I feel...
It hurts...

It really hurts...

When you see that opportunity...
You want that chance to much...
But it goes to someone else who doesn't make use of it at all...
It hurts alot...

When you know you can do something but you're not able to...
It hurts...

But...

That's all in the past now...

And I'm back...

The Advisor is back...

I'm not gonna let my past haunt me from this day forward...

I have confidence in the current commitee...
I have no questions of their authority and leadership skills...
I have no regrets whatsoever that they are what they are...
I am sure, these bunch of people will bring up the band...
And also, most importantly...

I have no doubt about the commitment...
For commitment there's a new name...
It's NASBAND...

With hearts that beat as one,
And music flows through our soul!

We are NASBAND!

*I love NASBAND to bits!*

Zupz Zupz!

Dear Bloggie...

I LOVE THIS SONG!

*sorry for not updating for millions of years, been really busy with projects and stuff, again, SORRY!!!!*

Zupz Zupz!

*
Fiqz.¤>^<----==='³{²[¹(--,--'''--,--)¹]²}³'===---->^<¤®¸ Md Tåúfíq ßìñ JãÞåh™ *Now she's 18 and 55 days young* =] says:
u want me to have a short life?
[c=#9CF198]♥[/c][b]Rebekahhhhh;[/b]_]] ` >GRACIOUS< TAUFIQ SAID I AM GOREY ! says:
ya.
[c=#9CF198]♥[/c][b]Rebekahhhhh;[/b]_]] ` >GRACIOUS< TAUFIQ SAID I AM GOREY ! says:
Fiqz.¤>^<----==='³{²[¹(--,--'''--,--)¹]²}³'===---->^<¤®¸ Md Tåúfíq ßìñ JãÞåh™ *Now she's 18 and 55 days young* =] says:
........
Fiqz.¤>^<----==='³{²[¹(--,--'''--,--)¹]²}³'===---->^<¤®¸ Md Tåúfíq ßìñ JãÞåh™ *Now she's 18 and 55 days young* =] says:
thanks hor
[c=#9CF198]♥[/c][b]Rebekahhhhh;[/b]_]] ` >GRACIOUS< TAUFIQ SAID I AM GOREY ! says:
Later so stress.
[c=#9CF198]♥[/c][b]Rebekahhhhh;[/b]_]] ` >GRACIOUS< TAUFIQ SAID I AM GOREY ! says:
Haiyo
[c=#9CF198]♥[/c][b]Rebekahhhhh;[/b]_]] ` >GRACIOUS< TAUFIQ SAID I AM GOREY ! says:
Love sick la.
[c=#9CF198]♥[/c][b]Rebekahhhhh;[/b]_]] ` >GRACIOUS< TAUFIQ SAID I AM GOREY ! says:
What band .
[c=#9CF198]♥[/c][b]Rebekahhhhh;[/b]_]] ` >GRACIOUS< TAUFIQ SAID I AM GOREY ! says:
Angry
[c=#9CF198]♥[/c][b]Rebekahhhhh;[/b]_]] ` >GRACIOUS< TAUFIQ SAID I AM GOREY ! says:
[c=#9CF198]♥[/c][b]Rebekahhhhh;[/b]_]] ` >GRACIOUS< TAUFIQ SAID I AM GOREY ! says:
DOn worry ,
Fiqz.¤>^<----==='³{²[¹(--,--'''--,--)¹]²}³'===---->^<¤®¸ Md Tåúfíq ßìñ JãÞåh™ *Now she's 18 and 55 days young* =] says:
it should be life's short
[c=#9CF198]♥[/c][b]Rebekahhhhh;[/b]_]] ` >GRACIOUS< TAUFIQ SAID I AM GOREY ! says:
i will go to your funeral .
Fiqz.¤>^<----==='³{²[¹(--,--'''--,--)¹]²}³'===---->^<¤®¸ Md Tåúfíq ßìñ JãÞåh™ *Now she's 18 and 55 days young* =] says:
not LIVE short
[c=#9CF198]♥[/c][b]Rebekahhhhh;[/b]_]] ` >GRACIOUS< TAUFIQ SAID I AM GOREY ! says:
I MEAN
[c=#9CF198]♥[/c][b]Rebekahhhhh;[/b]_]] ` >GRACIOUS< TAUFIQ SAID I AM GOREY ! says:
I WANT YOU TO LIVE SHORT.
Fiqz.¤>^<----==='³{²[¹(--,--'''--,--)¹]²}³'===---->^<¤®¸ Md Tåúfíq ßìñ JãÞåh™ *Now she's 18 and 55 days young* =] says:
....
[c=#9CF198]♥[/c][b]Rebekahhhhh;[/b]_]] ` >GRACIOUS< TAUFIQ SAID I AM GOREY ! says:
SHORT LIFE.
[c=#9CF198]♥[/c][b]Rebekahhhhh;[/b]_]] ` >GRACIOUS< TAUFIQ SAID I AM GOREY ! says:
lol
Fiqz.¤>^<----==='³{²[¹(--,--'''--,--)¹]²}³'===---->^<¤®¸ Md Tåúfíq ßìñ JãÞåh™ *Now she's 18 and 55 days young* =] says:
dis is sooooo goin on my blog

*

I told you I was gonna put it up... =X

Dear Bloggie...

*307th post*

Ok....
Today, was my birthday...
Technically I can't say was, cause it's still 14th July...
But I guess the day is pretty much summed up...
So here I am, like I always have been every year to update...

*remind self to thank those who wished me*

Went out in the morning to NASband...
Took the seniors marching...
Taught them tukar langkah which was, IMHO wasn't too bad...
I want to say I'm impressed by them, but I've seen what they can do...
So I expected more...
Took out my Eupho and practiced...
At the same time taught my juniors how to play...
Warm up and stuff...
Took the Tuba for sectionals in the end...
They were great, seriously...
No idea why the Eupho section kinda weak...
Oh wells...
Then I took the Sec 1s for combined...

First I told them to play the songs on two pages...
Then I got bored, so there was this new note for them....
I used this new note and make them practice tongue-ing....
I started slowly, but end up going fast cause they want me to go fast...
One of the flute juniors always call me "cher"...
I find it quite weird in a way...
After the Sec 1s combined...
The DM asked them to combine with their seniors for Trumpet Voluntary...
Their playing wasn't that bad, but I couldn't hear the bassline...
Maybe next Saturday when I come back then I can hear...
Yes I said next Saturday, meaning, Wednesday I can't go...
*Sorry juniors....=[*

After the combined, Mrs Chua talked to me...
Asked me where I was schooling at and all...
It feels good to be recognised by my conductor....=]
After keeping the instruments and packing the percussion instruments...
Me, Yihui, Caiyan, Izzad, Izzati, Liang Rong and Gwen went to Queensway...
Gosh I love this bunch of pple...
Especially LR, he was like the most ON person there....=x
We went around Queensway in search of a place to make our Band Tee...
Then in the end we landed on this shop on the 3rd storey...
And got a deal of 10 bucks per polo tee...
Hopefully the band can get the money in two weeks...
*Izzati, hope ur job won't be too bad chasing after pple for money*
And we were told we can collect the polo tees at bedok...
Which is soooo close to where we are la....
Now CY just need to make an order list of people buying the band tees...
And just send an email to them and the rest is up to them...
I just can't wait to get those polo tees... =X

*Goshness I am super shagged now, I'll just publish this up after I thank those who wished me today and bomb on my bed*

Thank you:
Valerie for wishing me on MSN after I told her I've got 365 days left of being a teenager...=X
Liyana for wishing me on MSN and make me feel old, thanks loads hor....=X
Salihin for wishing me on MSN too 20 mins before midnite and say in advance...hahakz...=X
Jihan for being the first to sms me and wish me happy birthday!
Esther for wishing me happy birthday too after going to NYP concert...=p
Alicia the CUTEY(-.-) for wishing me too...=X
iLLy for wishing me at 4am in the morning which I actually woke up, smiled and went back to sleep...
Kexin for smsing me in the morning the moment I finished bathing and got ready for school...
Huda for smsing me during my band prac to wish me happy bday...
Shuhadah for smsing me in the train and called me an Ah Meng, when halloween comes ur the ah meng i tell u... =X
Shermeen for smsing me while I was at Queensway and she's not coming to my concert! hmphz... =X
Bao Hui smsed me when I was going home from Queensway... =]
Fayyadh, actually I wished him first, den he wished me back.... Same bday mah... =X
Mabeline who wished me a few moments ago who's my tuba junior who's goin to musart concert with me tml....=X

And all those 9 people who wished me on my friendster! =D
THANK YOU ALL!
If I didn't write ur name, please tell me, I'd gladly edit it k....=]

Take carez people!
*NASband juniors are love =]*

Zupz Zupz!

Dear Bloggie...

*306th entry*

Ok...
This shall be a very short post...
Currently I'm busy with alot of things...

1. Band
2. Band
3. Band
4. OOP mini-project
5. SWIMMING(which i haven been goin)
6. Music Theory papers which I haven touch yet
7. D&IP test tomorrow
8. Do all my tutorials which I haven done any
9. Practice my high notes for concert
10. Hope to teach my sec 1s properly next time
11. Catch up with my friends
12. More band
13. More tutorials
14. MORE WORK

So you see...

I'm seriously very...

very...

tired....

yawnz....

NITEZ!

*when she sms-ed me in the morning, my heart pumped faster and my internal organs were jumping for joy*

Zupz Zupz!

Dear Bloggie...

*305th entry*

Right so today was the first of school for me...
I mean, first day of term two...
And well...
What better way to start off the term...
Then by failing three out of 5 modules I took for MST...
Yup u heard me...
I failed three out of 5...
Surprisingly maths was my highest among all three...
But I still failed though...
So it didn't make much difference whatsoever...

Reached school at around 9am...
Got back my first paper...
Which was CT&A...
I didn't expect to pass also...
And when I saw my marks...
I was like, hmmmm, ok... expected...
I got 32/100...
Amazing...
The lowest...
Then we went through all the questions and answer...
Then Val sms-ed me...
She was like, telling me she went passed my school...
And that she was in the train...
And I was like, errrrr, yea it's totally random...
She was surprised that I woke up early...
Then I was surprised that she wasn't in school...
I looked at my friend...
She was like "Today I was on my bed, my sis didn't wake up, so I thought still early, but when I look at the watch, I couldn't believe my eyes!"
Then we both stun there...
Then another friend came, and said sumting, "TODAY YOUTHDAY LA!!!"
And I was like, "I'm still a youth leh!!!"
Goshness la...

*nonsense alert*
Polytechnics should celebrate youthday...
At least those who are not youths can feel young again...
=X
*nonsense alert*

Anyways, after tutorial was practical...
We had to do 3 phas balanced curcuit...
And the lecturer emphasized on how dangerous the experiment is...
Cause we are using 230/400V using RYB connections...
Then I connected the resistor to the Ammeter and stuff...
And turned on the ELCB and poof! no it didn't explode...
I got readings from the ammeter!
Then, we took turns turning on the ELCB...
230V in ur hands, gosh I feel so powerful can...
And so the practical part ended in 30 mins time...
And me and my partner had to do our experiment...
Using thevenin's rule...
Convert the curcuit into a simplified curcuit...
Find Thevenin's voltage and Resistance...
Which me and my partner had trouble finding...*haiz*
In the end she told me she go do the calculations and stuff...

After that practical we had lunch and had our maths lesson...
It was tutorial, AGAIN...
So that was when I got back my second paper for the day...
Which was MATHS...
And AGAIN, I failed...
This time better then compared to last year...
Which is 42/100...
Not bad I should say...
But a fail is still a fail...
The lecturer was like, talking to me...
And tell me next time she wanna see all my tutorials...
I have no problem with that, I want to imrpove also...
Then further into the period...
Jing Yuan taught us about the MCT project and what we're supposed to know...
The lecturer came to me and show me my paper and show my mistakes...
She taught me what to do and all, she aint so bad after all!

Then while I was playing neopets(childish, i noe), the EID lecturer came in...
And it was tutorial again...
So yes, another paper...
And AGAIN, a fail...
But I got 33/100...
And it's better than my CT&A which was 32/100...
I just couldn't believe it...
Maybe I was just lucky and whacked everything correctly...
We went through the questions as per normal...
And discussed some of the questions...
And the lecturer dismissed us 30 mins early...

When I got home...
I was feeling kinda dizzy...
Went online to play neopets again(i noe i noe)....
Then after prayers I went to sleep...
Weird thing is, I can't sleep with the fan on...
I had to sleep while sweating...
I have no idea why, its just as it is ok...
And I woke up for prayers and went back to bed...
Woke up again at 9pm until now...
And soon I gotta get to bed or I'll be damn sleepy tomorrow...
So yea, I won't blog too much...=]

Take carez people!
Good nitez and Sweet Dreamz!

*Sam where are you?*

Zupz Zupz!

Dear Bloggie...

*304th entry*

Ok I'm back...
I said yesterday that I will blog today...
And so here I am...
Even though today was such a very painful and boring day...
I will just have to live with that...

And so MST week has ended...
The weekends have ended...
And that can only mean one thing for me...
Go home late and wake up early...
Or should the sequence be wake up early and go home late?
Anyway u want la k?
So it means tomorrow I have to wake up early to go to school...
Which I'm not quite looking forward to...
As the first lesson is CT&A which I'm suppose to do a report...
Meaning, I have to bring laptop...
Bring laptop means my back will hurt the moment I reach school...
I just have to endure it...

I just finished reading my maths PBIL question...
I wanted to write it down in this blog...
But the question is uber long...
So I think when I have time and when I'm not lazy I shall write...
But thoughts on the question...
There's this billionaire who was murdered with a shot to the head...
And when the body was found, his friend was standing near the body with the murder weapon...
So the question would like to suspect that the friend killed this billionaire..
But WE have to prove how is he guilty, or maybe NOT guilty...
So we're given alot of information...
And we must use Newton's Law of cooling to solve...
Sub in all the values and solve the equation...
We also need to know the time of death of this billionaire...
And that's it...
But what wonders me most, is why this billionaire dun have body guard?
Sometimes maths questions just can't be logical, haiz...

So tomorrow...
First lesson is CT&A tutorial...
Of which I think I'll be getting back my MST paper...
Hopefully I won't have to...
But I got a feeling I will get and fail it miserably...
But it's ok, if I fail this time, I'll work harder next time...
After tutorial is Lab...
This is where I have to HAVE TO do well in...
The questions are kinda easy to do...
I just hope the report that I will write tomorrow doesn't screw up...

Ok I got nothing else to say...
It's around 11.03pm now on my clock...
So I guess it's time to go!

"Please and thank you, it's all the magic words, if you want nice things to happen they're the words that should be heard, remember please and thank you, they're all the magic words... Use 'em in the morning at noon at night cause it's a great way to be polite! please and thank you they're the magic words..."

"Clean up clean up everybody everywhere, clean up clean up everybody do your share!"

Take care everyone!
Good nights and Sweet dreams to all...
And hopefully I'll have enough energy to blog tomorrow night...=]

Zupz Zupz!