Find the good....and praise it

"Some people have a wonderful capacity to appreciate again and again, freshly and naively, the basic goods of life, with awe, pleasure, wonder and even ecstasy." A H Maslow

I want to be one of those people.
So here are the things in my life that I am so grateful for, in no particular order.

1. The Great Plan of Happiness
   
2. This experience called life.
   
3. Good health, which I must admit, I don't often think about, until something stops working like it should.
   
4. Freedom, in all its capacities
5. Parents who taught me well
   
6. People who are smarter than me, as well as people who some how manage to make me look smart.
   
7. A husband who works really hard and is passionate about everything he does.
   
8. Fertility and Birth Control
9. Healthy children
10. Grandparents who teach life's lessons well
11. The desire to work hard
12. The diversity and beauty of our amazing world
13. A creator who gave me all the the things listed above, to love and cherish.
14. Family Traditions, although I cannot come up with any at the moment.
15. Camp-outs
16. Roaring hot baths
17. Disposable diapers
18. Puppies, babies, and all other things that are innocent and pure
    
19. Good friends
20. Good neighbors
21. Seinfeld, cause it always makes me laugh
22. Renting....Because it allows us to live within our means
    
23. All the good intentioned people that lecture us about throwing our money away....See reason number 22
    
24. Sunday naps
25. Quiet places
26. Cool water on a hot day
27. Sunshine on my skin
28. The ability I have to be at home with my kids, even if most days I tend to think that is more of a curse than a blessing.
29. My garden swing, which sits in the shade of a big tree
    
30. Growing a garden of my own
31. Flowers in all their glorious colors, shapes and scents
32. A wild and sometimes overly active imagination
33. A dad who can fix anything, even if grumbles the whole time.
    
34. A mom who has stood by me
35. Wonderful In-laws that give to us, even when they probably needed it more.
36. The three P's, Popcorn, Potato's and Pasta
37. Garden fresh salsa
38. Microwaves
39. Hair Dye
40. Having my beautician also be one of my best friends
    
41. Japanese cars, because they just keep going and going and going
42. The internet
43. Cousin sleepovers
44. Roller coasters
45. Home cooked meals, especially when I don't have to do the cooking
46. Night Games, flashlight tag, backyard sleepovers
    
47. Changing seasons, because each season has a way of making me want the other.
    
48. A home which offers protection from the elements
49. My husbands freakishly sharp and curled toenails, because they make me appreciate the fact that mine aren't that way
50. Two little children that some how make the most asinine things funny

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow."~ Melody Beattie ~

"Fear Not"

The kitchen sink is full of unwashed dishes, dirty laundry litters our laundry room floor, Dylan and Alivia have everything under the stars strewn about the house and yet strangely enough I find myself staring at our computer monitor. I know I should be cleaning, so why is it I'm frozen where I am? I could go with the answer I so often like to use, that goes something like this....For six and a half years now I have cooked the same meals, heard the same complaints, washed the same dishes, changed thousands of dirty diapers, washed the same clothes and cleaned up the same messes, DAY after DAY, nothing changes! The monotony of it all really gets to me, so some days I just "shut down" and don't do anything at all.
But this time I think there is something more to my shutting down.
I am famous for shutting down when things get complicated, I guess its just how I deal with things. Most of the time I just need to talk out my worries and problems with anybody who will listen, but sometimes I find my greatest relief in writing things down. I guess it forces me to focus on what is really bothering me, it makes me clarify my own thoughts. Things just seem to flow when I'm writing, I guess it's because my thought process isn't being interrupted by other peoples thoughts, opinions, and views on life. I value what others have to say, I really do, in fact I usually put to much stock in others opinions anyway, but there are times when I just have to work out things with me.
This past Sunday, during church a gentlemen from our stake gave a talk about having faith, I cannot recall his exact words, but somethings he said left me wondering about my own faith. I find it something more than coincidental that this week has made me further question just how strong my faith really is.
When I was younger, I had good friends and good leaders in my ward, but I was young, angry and confused, I couldn't separate MY reality from what was really going on. I was always told that Heavenly Father loved all his children and that he was kind and merciful, but at that age I just didn't see it that way. I was convinced that God had it out for me.
Thankfully I matured and so did my thought process.
A little over a year ago I had an experience that forever changed me. I cannot think of a time in my life where I prayed so hard, hurt so bad, and despite it all, learned so much. It's a lesson I never want to have to learn again, but I also think it was a lesson I desperately needed. Somewhere amongst the heartache I think I found that Heavenly Father that I was taught about in Sunday school.
So I thought my faith had grown by leaps and bounds and that there was no stopping me now....Until reality crept in that is. Life is scary!
Many of my friends are recently, or in the process of getting divorces, which makes me question if it's even possible to stay married these days.
Gas prices are jumping about 10 cents every other day, which is making everything you need to survive, spike in cost also. My grocery bill has more than doubled and I'm buying the exact same stuff, if not less of it.
So here is what I have been trying to get at all along, I love the Gospel of Jesus Christ, I love It's principles. I love what it has to offer, but I'm not sure I have learned how to have the faith to believe everything is going to work itself out. I have been taught over and over again to "Fear Not", yet I find myself glued to this chair scared out of my mind. Wondering how Derik and I can make it as a couple, wondering how we are going to raise our children with morals and decency, when they are surrounded by everything but that. Wondering how we'll ever be able to afford a home of our own, feed our children and put some gas in our car. Wondering how we will try to make things stretch just a little more. Wondering why I'm wondering because we really are blessed and always have been.
Things are good for now, but I worry so much about the "what ifs", I'm making myself crazy!
So if somebody would just tell me how to "Fear Not", I can go get my dishes done.

27 Things I Have Learned

So in honor of turning 28 years old tomorrow I thought I would take a minute and share 27 things that my life has taught me.

1. Life never goes according to plan
2. My prayers are heard and answered, despite all my screw-ups
3. Some of Gods greatest gifts to me were and are unanswered prayers
4. There is beauty all around
5. Family is everything
6. I was lucky to get the mother I did
7. My dad worked hard everyday so that I could have the good things in life
8. I have some amazing siblings who have touched my life in so many ways.
9. Everything happens for a reason
10. What doesn't kill you, does make you that much stronger
11. You cannot please everyone, but I still try
12. Laughter is the best medicine.... for anything
13. Life goes on....
14. Hard work is therapeutic
15. You get to make choices, but you don't get to choose your consequence
16. The fork is mightier than the treadmill
17. Everyone has skeletons in their closets
18. Love is not at all how I imagined it
19. Coming up with 27 things to write about at midnight is difficult
20. Life is full of blessing, if you'll just look for them
21. A good deed never goes unnoticed or unrewarded
22. The power of forgiveness can fix almost anything
23. Pick your battles wisely
24. Change is refreshing
25. Things are easier said than done
26. Things that are worked for always mean more
27. I have something to offer, even if I'm not sure what it is.

27 years have passed, and despite some long and hard fought battles, I hope to have a whole lot more!

Mothers Day

I guess it wouldn't be Mothers Day for me without these guys.
Derik thanks for making me a Mother. Dylan and Alivia, thanks for being my obnoxiously, yet hopelessly lovable little bundles of non-stop adventures!

And what would Mothers Day be without a little thank you to the woman I call Mother. Happy Mothers Day Mom! All this happened because you (It's all your fault!), so thanks a lot!
I have a lot of wonderful things in my life thanks to you. So listen up while I tell you about all the things I love and admire about you.
First and foremost thanks for giving me life, and then putting up with me for the last 28 years.
Second, thanks for being you!
I have typed and erased and typed and erased (mostly because every things coming out in one giant messed up and sometimes offensive way), and I still cannot spit out what it is I'm trying to say.
You taught me to love deeply, even when it's super tough. You taught me to believe in my Father in Heaven and in his son Jesus Christ. You taught me the importance of family. You loved and served each one of your children to the best of your ability, no matter how badly we hurt and mistreated you. Your love touched me so much, that I in turn wanted to be a mother so I could love my children like you loved me. You gave me this crazy love for gardening. You are always there for me when I'm having one of my "CRAZY" episodes. You were like an angel from heaven to me, when I first came home with Dylan and was beside myself with anxiety and trepidation. You held him while I cried, you stocked our fridge with food, you took me out to get some fresh air. You supported me through a lot of tough times and I love you for that. You are the strongest woman I know. You work so hard for so little. You are beautiful inside and out!
You, Mom are what I aspire to be!

Last but not least I would love to give my love to the many great women who helped raise my husband.
Aunt Diane and Grandma Giovannoni, you two amaze me and I will forever be grateful for your sacrifices in behalf of Derik. I know that you loved him with every fiber of your beings, I just know he couldn't have had two more loving mothers than you. I'm glad I married Derik, because I inherited you all, as part of my family.
Anita and girls, what a force for good you were (and are) in Derik's life. I love you guys so much for all the good you instilled in his heart, and for giving him a feel for what life is like in a loving and uplifting traditional family. A million thanks wouldn't be enough.
I consider myself very lucky, to be surrounded by so many Powerful and Amazing Woman!
Happy Mothers Day

An Almost Perfect Mothers Day Weekend

So this is how I had an almost perfect Mothers day weekend....

Saturday started out with a short little visit from Aunt Diane and Uncle Ernie, we cannot help but laugh at Uncle Ernie because he will drive all the way up here (to Midvale, from Lehi Utah) just to say, "Well it was nice seeing you but I'm leaving". I know when Ernie comes to visit I have less then five and a half minutes to get my visiting done! `

Good Thing Number 1

The weather was beautiful so after Diane and Ernie left, I pulled out my arsenal of yard tools and went to town.  I mowed, weed-wacked, edged and tilled up my garden.

And just in case you're wondering if I'm obsessed with my yard, I have to admit I really am.
I like to take pictures of it and see what improvements I make through out the year. Seeing my garden grow from little seedling to fruit producing wonders is awe inspiring to me.

Good Thing Number 2

About seven and a half years ago, Derik introduced me to Joe and Anita Walker, the most wonderful people I think I have ever met.

And I'm guessing right now you are all wondering what they have to do with a picture of a stove, well here is how it all ties together.

They recently remodeled their home and we where lucky enough to be on the receiving end of their old (more like new) stove. I am seriously excited to put this thing to good use!

Bless Joe and Anita's hearts for being so generous with us, we will always be indebted to you guys, not just for the stove but for all the kind things you have done for us over the years.

  

Good Thing Number 3

Derik fractured his foot and jammed his toe a couple of nights ago (and no that's not the good news), but that didn't stop him from being the most handsome delivery man around. He played musical stoves for a while and then brought me home a new garden swing, all without one single complaint! What an awesome husband I have.
Did I mention that I love porch/garden swings, there is something about the idea of sitting around and watching the world go by, that I find soothing.
Much to my surprise little Alivia loves the swing as much as I do, it's like magic, she just sits in the thing and doesn't make a peep, for hours on end.

I guess I'm not the only one who plans on spending all summer in it.

So as good as my weekend was, it just fell short of the "perfect" status, because I had one horrible, terrible moment.

I have this one pair of perfect summer pants, well actually they are my only pair of summer pants, but they are fabulous! I have had them for quite some time and have become rather found of them. And I melted them, YEP, you heard (or read) me right, I melted them. Being the savvy genius I am I figured I could pick up the garden tiller and carry it to the next bed instead of trying to maneuver the thing around all the twists and turns of my garden, it was only after my skin was tingling and that horrible hot piercing pain flooded my brain, did I realize that the tiller has very hot parts that you shouldn't shove next to your body. Although nothing, not even the tingling burning pain I felt, could compare to the unspeakable horror I felt when I looked down and saw I had melted my pants.
So I guess now is as good of time as ever to ask, Mom, can you sew melted material back together?

Trains, Trains, Trains

This is what I spent my Friday night doing. I thought I would snap a few shots and cherish all my hard work, since I know Dylan is just itching to tear it apart so he can stage some awesome train wreck(s). This thing is so long I couldn't quite get it all in one shot.

I like to create new design and layouts and Dylan loves to tear them apart, we make quite the pair don't we.

My Apple Trees are Blossoming

73 degrees and a UV index of 9.

It is days like today that get me all excited for summer!
I'm practically going out of my mind with this years "on again, off again weather".
Sometime in the last four years I developed a real passion for yard work and gardening, and I just don't know how much longer I can contain myself. When Derik and I first moved to this home I experimented with trying to grow a little garden in a patch of dirt in the backyard. But much to my disappointment the plants all shriveled up and died despite my best efforts to baby them. Although the garden flopped miserably, I think something inside of me awakened and my inner yard and garden junkie was let loose. So last summer I decided I would build a raised garden and try to improve the quality of soil. So I sat down surfed the internet for garden tips and then sketched out my plans and built this garden from the ground up.
I must say everything did beautifully and I thought it looked great too.

Things I hope to grow this year
Peas, Strawberries, Lettuce, Tomato's, Green Chilies, Green, Red and Yellow Bell Peppers, Cucumbers, Zucchini, Spaghetti Squash, Carrots, Green Beans, Eggplants, and a whole mother-load of Flowers.

Last years garden in it's early stage

Tomatos and Peppers

Eggplants, Cucumbers and Corn

My Eggplants and Zucchini

Catching Up

So it has only been a couple of days since I last blogged but, lots of fun things have happened.

So I was feeling a little overwhelmed this weekend due to the fact that I had a lot of obligations and parties planned. After celebrating Dylan's birthday on Friday, I invited family up to have a little get together. Which kind of had me tied in knots because I wasn't sure how I was going to feed all the Celiacs (wheat allergies) in my family and still have something that was filling and delicious. Can I just tell you how thankful I am for fresh fruit and corn chips!

Nachos with the "works" and fresh fruit

After dinner my brother Eric was kind enough to whip out his camera and snap some great shots, (did I mention he's a genius with a camera) thanks Eric! You should be able to see a few of his shots on my earlier post.
Sunday was also packed with things to do. I was asked to substitute my sons CTR 5 primary class as well as host a little goodbye party for some friends in the ward.
Can I just say WOW.... whom ever teaches religious ideas to a classroom of five years olds on a regular basis deserves some kind of medal of honor, because that was one brutal experience. Having my son in the class probably didn't help much, since he's overly energetic and riddled with wondering thoughts. I guess it was one of the experiences that taught me to be grateful for what primary teachers or any other teachers for that matter do, EVERY Sunday, bless their souls.
After church Derik and I had some couples that are moving from our ward over for pizza. We had such a good time and the weather outside was great! It's a shame we didn't get to know them all sooner.

Life is Fun with the Right Bunch of People.

Uncle Eric put it best, Dylan having some unsupervised fun!

You have got to love these Goldy locks

Two beautiful girls, Cozette and Alivia

Mom and Livie

Grandma and Cozy discovered a new form of torture, "the upside-down tickle".

Five Years in the Making

Dylans Birthday Part II

Bless my poor little soul, there is just something about me and making cakes that just doesn't mix. I tell myself every year I have no talent in this arena of the kitchen but, time after time I find myself trying to throw one together, shame on me.
 

Alivia gave Dylan his favorite treat "Smarshmellows"

Dylan was pretty excited he got to add the Grand Central Station to his Geo Collection.

Of all his gifts, Dylan was the most tickled to receive this one
from his cousins Morgan and Sydney

Dylans Fifth Birthday

Murphy's Law....

I was so excited to snap some pictures today of Dylan birthday when low and behold....

My little mischief makers some how managed to lose both rechargeable batteries to my camera, (which are the only two batteries strong enough to power the thing), as well as misplacing the SD card...Go figure!

I've torn apart beds and couches and still no luck. So for now I guess there will be no pictures :(

Getting Started is the Hardest Part....Right?

I just can't seem to figure out a way to get this thing going, so I'm just going to plunge in and give it a go.

Tomorrow will be Dylan's 5th birthday.... And even though he is growing up fast, I can honestly say it feels like I have had him for forever, although, it might just be the fact that he has endless energy, a wondering mind and the ability to never listen to a word I say, that makes me feel that way.

Nonetheless, I have had five years of non stop adventures since sweet Dylan was born and as each day passes and everyday life happens, my memory gets fuzzy, and I forget things I thought I never would. So maybe, just maybe, this blog will help me to write down the moments that shape our lives and mold who we are.