Goodbye came all the time!

18/10/2018

Today a very challenging day... Or should I say that my life everyday is challenging... Oh well... I should be glad that i able to settle my work stuff nicely and manage to get to see her. But still it ended up with pain on the wit hours of 19/10...

It's so hard to find someone who really understand me and accept me. So hard to express all out in words and sometime really feel like giving up but no because love...i always pull it through by forgiving. But yet after all tries at the end of the day still end up with much pain. And that's is love probably. It always end up with someone leaving.

I stop blogging for very long but I guess it's time to start blogging... Don't know maybe when u feel old le u just tend to cherish all kind of feeling. And love make human weak or strong... Smile or tears...

3rd day without sleep and finally when u thought u can have a nice sleep...but thoughts won't let u go... This kind of feeling, I got it again and again and really hate...maybe I should stop being a night owl... Is not healthy...

I'm tired... Very tired...

This kind of tiredness I guess I can sleep for 36 hours straight. But can I... Can I put down all and just sleep without waking up?

I'm tired... Very tired...

With life and with love and with everything... The only things that pull me through is my dad and my mum... I am most lucky to have them as my parent... Without them... Never will have me in this world.

If God give me a chance to go back and start all my life again... Will I? No I will not because I know it either be the same or even worse because life is like this...u need to learn and learn throughout everything...

26th Oct I need to.... Urm... I still thinking...

Sorry I've said to cherish but there's so many thing that you don't know... It's hard for me... Perhaps u never know me... I hate to say goodbye and the numerous goodbye still yet to numb me... Again and again so tired... You've tried and I've tried. At the end of the day u will still leave me the same way they did so why I still trying for a different result?  Why I still stupid and losing sleep? I never give up on people unless people give me up....

But I'm tired... V tired... Give me a break God... Let me rest... Either u bring me up or destroy me at one go... Don't do it slowly pls...

Now is 5:37am...i try close my eyes and few hours later...open my eyes and we say goodbye... again...

OK I now try close my eyes... Always only blog when down... Because my life not much up time... Or can say never... Haha...

Bye.