Tuesday, May 31, 2005
tHanxz!!!
ytd performance turns out okay.. felt the crowd.. felt the luv.. ppl cheerin me on.. ppl lot of ppl.. thanxz everyone...!!! N a very BIG THANK YOU to BAN for wakin up early, comin down to help, comin up wit the idea of wat to wear.. u make me look good..of couse thanxz for the hair.. n for recordin.. n oso for calmin me down before dancin.. thanxz man.. i owe a million.. or maybe even more..
craVed fRom mY hEaRt 9:30 AM
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Saturday, May 28, 2005
haiZzz
its already 5 n i still cant sleep.. but y? i dun seem to noe it myself..how lame is tt.. its up to u to judge.. i guess i cant get the fact tt we're performin on sundae out of my mind.. GOD.. the stress, pressure, scared.. how to get thru all of tt.. i wonder how ive overcome my nervous all tis while..
craVed fRom mY hEaRt 8:09 PM
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toO muCh
argh!!! stress overcomes me.. fuck!!! i can cope wit the cheer routin but not for the dance.. im so behind the rest, how to feel the dance when it doesnt come to me as second nature..how???!!! all i can do is give my best effort but how.. im still tired from daes of trainin..
craVed fRom mY hEaRt 3:06 AM
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Thursday, May 26, 2005
boRinG Life & miSses fWens
everydae is an activity dae, dance, cheer, dance, cheer.. maybe its true wat ying sae, my life is borin.. all i ever do is cheer n dance, but im passionate bout the both of them.. now, i dun seem to be able to concentrate at all,n tt sux.. i noe i cant give my best for tis sun's performance.. im screwed... Nywyaes, i miss all my fwens.. always.. even if i jux met them ten min ago.. dun seem to get to spend time wit them like before.. mostly i miss my greatest fwens like ban, boo, liyana, shaz, haryadi, shawn n ayu.. these ppl have made a big impact in life.. n still does wit their advices, jokes, encouragements.. witout them i wldnt be nywhere near to wat ive accomplished so far..THANXZ U GUYS..LURVES..hahak..
craVed fRom mY hEaRt 3:48 PM
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Wednesday, May 25, 2005
a dAe iN a Life Of a pErfoRmer
im really tired out from todae's trainin...we didnt do much todae cuz azi had to leave early.. n syira n naz didnt make it todae.. tt sux.. when will we ever have a full attendance trainin.. tml is my vb ut.. im afraid tt i cant get an A.. cuz i noe i deserve it real bad.. hahak..wat the hell.. there'll oso be dance prac after sch.. hope tt i can give my best tml.. ohh yar.. we're havin two big cheer performance n tt adds up to a total of seven performance for me..argh!! help me.. im so afraid of not being able to remb all tt im suppose to do n screw up ny of the performances.. tis is gettin a little too much.. im so very scared n the thing is im the only one who is in tis situation.. sumbody save me..!!
craVed fRom mY hEaRt 3:55 PM
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uNceRtainty oF my fEeLings
tears that i have been formin behin my eyes are pourin out, cascadin down my cheeks... i cant hold them back no more.. am i griefin or am i still in luv...?? cry.. cryin.. cried.. reminiscin bout the past.. i noe i cant go back to her.. i hate myself..
craVed fRom mY hEaRt 7:38 AM
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hoMe aLone
Didnt go to sch todae, again..hahhak.. tis is like the seventh time already.. so im left wit three more daes tis semester...damn.. but of course i can rely on mcs.. gonna go back to my old daes.. i used to go polyclinic jux to get mc whenever i dun go to sch... cuz i wld skip for over 30 daes in total last year..hahahk... so, now im at home doin nuthin.. actually waitin for cheer to start.. but i havent eat since there's nuthin to eat ard here.. jux finish pleadin wit syira to come to cheer..i tink bribin wld be a better term...argh!! ayu didnt bring cheer shoe again..!!
craVed fRom mY hEaRt 7:19 AM
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Monday, May 23, 2005
holiDay fuLL of screAms!!!
todae started out to be a borin dae.. but thanxz to ayu, it became otherwise..hahak.. we went to catch House Of Wax n as usual ayu came late.. so nywywaes, we went into the cinema running up to our seats only to be seated at the wrong seats..crappies.. i was screamin most of the time durin those gory scenes.. GOD.. it was digustin n full of sadist.. i keep wincin to a point tt my remarks got louder each time.. the sight of paris hilton gettin killed was really satisfyin.. cant wait for another type of these story.. tml is cheer dae!!! happy.. gonna go over my limit again.. syahirah!!! bingit.. come to practice!!! plz!!
craVed fRom mY hEaRt 4:21 PM
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Sunday, May 22, 2005
oN mY oWn
wat a boring dae todae is, im surrounded by ppl who dun seem to noe how to reply to smses, GOD, throw them away then. its a complete waste of time n money, well, at least for me.. actually there's a REMIX briefin but then dunno wat happen, not goin.. now nuthin to do.. Im in need of some indulgence, the things i normally do when im alone, jux to free my mind. its been awhile since i cook spaghetti or do extreme cases of facials or even dance to loud music n sing at the top of my lungs.. those were the daes.. tink im gonna go do one of these things.. wooHoo..
craVed fRom mY hEaRt 3:27 PM
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tRainiNg waS sO fUn
thur's trainin was so very fun. .. i finally found tt feelin of satisfaction again.. tis time trainin was productive, we work together closely wit the help from azi (formerly denvers capt). She is fun and all.. and i actually learnt sumthin new like crouchin position n pop toss technique.. wat was really fulfilling wld be carryin ayu to shlder sit from the front and being the shoulder stand base with ayu again includin a liberty at the side (wit one leg on top of ayu) (tt was really heavy; but i've managed)..woHoo.. To all the previous cheerleaders i've worked wit who tinks tt im weak, well, ure very wrong, u noe who u are, fuck u..!! Im so lookin forward to next prac..
craVed fRom mY hEaRt 1:57 AM
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Sunday, May 15, 2005
rEveaLinG aNotheR siDe oF mE
Feelin rather lost from the world.. Morbid tots fill my mind as i search for tt one spark of initiation to indicate a new chapter in life.. Must i go thru wit tis or can i skip it.. Tears formin behin my eyes but i could only hold them back like wat ive always been in; being in denial.. its one way that i manage to handle my problems all tis while.. After goin thru wit it witout tinkin much, I gave up.. N now I feel the same: nuthin.. Denial again or jux dun care.. I dun seem to noe myself.. is tt gd or not? uncertainty surrounds me as i dwell on the things im suppose to do..
craVed fRom mY hEaRt 4:43 AM
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