...

it has been fun lately, with her presence. a new flesh and blood for me to play with, to share things with, and to hug and kiss. but what is this strange feeling that i had lately?

Have i not been able to let go of the past?


I dreamt of "her", again and again, and the nightmares goes on. It robs me of my ability to think properly during the daylight, and or when i am around my girlfriend. "She" hurts me once, and this thing keeps going on and on and on...

God, please help me when nobody else can...

one last cry

"One Last Cry"
My shattered dreams and broken heart
Are mending on the shelf
I saw you holding hands
Standing close to someone else
Now I sit all alone
Wishing all my feelings was gone
I gave my best to you
Nothing for me to do
But have one last cry

One last cry
Before I leave it all behind
I gotta put you out of my mind this time
Stop living a lie
I guess I'm down to my last cry
------------------------------------------

it has been 1 months since the incident, but i keep getting back to square one.

Like the words suggest, i need to give it up, but why crying is always the hardest thing for me to do.
It is so easy to get myself hurt, but why i cannot let it go and moved on.

I need to get up, stop living in this imagery world of my own. i need to be strong. but why cant i.

Living each day with this burden in my head is proven too much for me. i need to seek a help. somewhere, somehow. or else...

and now i start to sounds like a sissy.. i am a man for christ's sake..

Hope... shows something bad as good, like a curtain which hides things on the stage.

Hope...Drives people. Like a hungry animal which is lured by the smell of food, humans will also follows the pathway where they think hope is ahead..

Hope... Is a devilish instrument. Coz it torment people, by failing what humans are hoping for. It allows people to work as hard as they can, searching for hope which might not be achieved before their lives are over.

Basically, those of you, who gives hope to other people but planning to fail those hopes. You are not more than devils.

Yeah. Like what you did to me too. Your false hopes tormented me. And i wished that u wouldnt even bothered to do all those things we did tgthr. F**king Wh**e
anw.. Lives goes on!
Life has been great here, despite the fact that i lack socializing. sigh. Need to buckle up wif it, or i will have a hard time in Uni. And my personality is not those kind which can make friends easily
Miss u all, 05s12, ARC, hostelites, the Indons! haha. Taking result soon. Damn scared, but looking forward to it.
Cheerios!! SEE YOU ALL NXT WEEK!! MISS U GUYS

Membuka Lembaran Baru

Happy NEW YEAR!!! with 2006 has become a history, lets make 2007 an even better year for all of us.

Kinda miss the life in 2006. All the friendship, all the hardwork we put for our cca, and all the mugging we did for our A lvl. It was a very torturing experience, but somehow i missed it. Sense the irony?

Ok, talking about new year resolution, this is my resolution for 2007: Same as 2006

my resolution for 2006: same as 2005

My resolution for 2005: same as 2004

my resolution for 2004: same as 2003

my resolution for 2003: same as 2002

my resolution for 2002: stop making all those impossible-to-fulfill new year resolutions.

Yeah, i am so realistic in life.

New year, new life, new sadness in life.. Sometimes your past can be like a ghost who will always keep lingering around you no matter where you go, and its getting bigger and bigger. But we have to live with it. Bear it, pay no heed to it, keep moving on.

Lets be more positive in this new year! OOZZZ!!..... Amen!

.....

Attitude transplant never work..