____iM faLliNg.. fOr u// *

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

+ shut up +

i made up my mind.
lets not be friends anymore.
we dont have the need to contact each other.
dont ever think of me again.
i will never think of those past ever again.
it'll only make me lose appetite.
no mood to play.
no mood to study.
i have my friends now.
just forget all about me.
pretend that we never meet before.
i will not hate you for anything.
just want to end it.
ignore the previous entry.
i want nothing to do with you the next life.
please dont contact me ever again.
all your contact will be deleted.
i'm happy enough now.
do not want to be sad over this again.
if you really care, please dont contact me again.
thank you.

StiLl FaLliNg.//* 8:50 PM

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Sunday, March 05, 2006

+ my story +

i do not know whether you still read my blog.
i cannot guess the reason you left.
leaving me cause you think i will be happy?
it's not true even till now.

but i finally agree this final break up.
cause i feel you will be happy without me.
i left because of you.
i left because i love you too much.

please be happy without me.
please do not waste my effort.
please forget me as your boyfriend,
but remember me as your best friend.

you may hate me.
may dislike me.
may think that i'm irritating.
it's ok.

i'll never cast you away even if you kill me, hurt me, do anything bad to me.
cause i'll only think of your good and never your bad.
cause we were once husband and wife.
cause we were once fated to be together.

i'll never give up on you
do not give up on yourself.
i do not ask for anything back,
only hope for your safety and happiness.

i pray
for your happiness.
i pray
for me to leave quietly.

clearing up things to end this relationship.
prepare myself, to start a new friendship.
i'll work very hard,
to prove that your words are true.

my love and care shall blind my pride and status.
dont cry.
be strong.
you should know i'm always there protecting you.

my door is closed.
but not locked.
i'll be your last friend that stood quietly by your side.
you will see me one day.

*I declared that Lin Zhiren is dead on 18/02/2006.
She commited suicide.
reason: to join her wife.
A new born awaits.

"i swear : next life, i want to take you as my wife. will you marry me?"
i'll wait... for answer...

*my last blog entry, thank you for reading my story*

StiLl FaLliNg.//* 6:53 PM

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Thursday, August 18, 2005

+ a special world +

A Special World

A special world for you and me

A special bond one cannot see

It wraps us up in its cocoon

And holds us fiercely in its womb.

Its fingers spread like fine spun gold

Gently nestling us to the fold

Like silken thread it holds us fast

Bonds like this are meant to last.

And though at times a thread may break

A new one forms in its wake

To bind us closer and keep us strong

In a special world, where we belong.

*written by Sheelagh Lennon

StiLl FaLliNg.//* 10:43 AM

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Friday, August 12, 2005

+ wall i must break +

i wish to break the wall.

i want to break the wall.

i will break the wall.

for your sake.

for your happiness.

for your future.

for you.

StiLl FaLliNg.//* 7:48 PM

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Thursday, August 11, 2005

+ thanks +

i know you dont have my blog link but well... if you mangaged to find it... you'll be happy to see me typing about you. thanks for being there when i need someone. really thanks for appearring when i need help and support. you know who you are. the one who won the monopoly. lol. =)

StiLl FaLliNg.//* 11:20 AM

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Tuesday, August 09, 2005

+ loneliness +

*There's a loser in my mirror crying tonight, and there's nothing I can say to make her feel alright.

strangely, i begin to like the feeling of loneliness. dont take it away from me.

StiLl FaLliNg.//* 9:42 PM

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Sunday, July 17, 2005

+ history +

she is everything to me, yet i am nothing to her.

that history really hurts. so badly inside me. i dont hate. i regret. i feel sorry. all my fault. i'm the cause of it. everything lies in me. nothing to do with the old her.

i'm drowned on 310704. thats almost a year ago. but she came into my life. i'm very happy. i never expect i can get so much happiness.i swear to give in, to give up everything for her. i do not want to feel regret again. cause i love her. even if i'm unhappy, i should not complain. but that actually wearing a mask. inside is suffering even more. i'm confused. making her happy balance with having me upset.

*i really hope i can tell you everything. i want to be happy too. but i still so scared of the past. scared history will occur again. i'm even more afraid that i cant hold on any longer. feel like i'm fighting the battle all by myself. i'm feeling very lonely. i want to vanish...

StiLl FaLliNg.//* 11:45 PM

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