Quote of the Day

Benjamin: Me flickin' my head.

Other funny things he says:

"I did it all by my own". (I did it all by myself).

Booty goes at the end of everything. And I do mean everything!!

"Me hunny boy" (funny)

"I pulled my arm. That not be good. Right mom?"

"Me not naughty boy" this usually comes immediately following something naughty.

I love the way he talks. There are many letters he does not pronounce correctly but it's so darn cute. I want to keep him my baby forever.

My Big Smart Boy!

It's been a while since I've posted about how school is going. So here goes. Lucas is always amazing me. He is so smart, and education seems to come so easy and natural to him. A lot of his classes are online, and I don't usually sit with him while he does them. I usually just get it going make sure he knows what he's supposed to be doing and then find something else to do. 

On Tuesday I had a parent teacher conference with his teacher, and she was telling me that by the end of the semester on December 18th they should be between 30% and 40% complete in all subjects. It's always nice to have an update because I lost track a long time ago. She said Lucas was doing wonderful, so no need to stress. I took a look this morning though and decided I'd like him to be at 45% done in all areas by the end of the weekend. 

One of the areas he need to play "catch up" was language skills. So we did a few vocabulary lessons. One of the activities would show a picture and give a list of three possible answers. (This vocabulary list happened to be words dealing with reading.) There were nine questions, and on each one, he would look at the picture, determine the answer and then sound out the options to find the one that fit. For example, one of the answers was 'chapter' so he says, "chapter, the answer is chapter. CH makes the 'ch' sound. CH-a-p-t-ER. Chapter. The answer is C." I about fell out of my seat! 

Yesterday we went to Chick-fil-A with another homeschool friend. Her mom was helping the kids sound out seven and eight letter words on the play area signs. It was crazy! 

Then while I was finishing up dinner we were playing I Spy in the kitchen. When it was my turn I said that I spied something green. He was naming off every green thing he could see. Mostly really creative answers. I finally decided to give him a clue. "YOU are very close." He named off a few things that were close to him. Finally I said to him, "I'm emphasizing the word you. YOU, are very close." He looked down and asked if it was his shirt, which it was. I was super impressed that he understood me telling him where I was putting the emphasis. He's a smart smart boy! 

Here is his current progress in school: 

Math 60%

Phonics 36%

Language Skills 44%

Literature & Comprehension 45%

Hand Writing 45%

Science 43%

History 31%

Social Studies 100%

Art 46%

Music 46%

It's obvious we need to get to working on History and Phonics. He actually LOVES phonics, but those seem to be the two most time consuming subjects. 

Tis The Season

I love Christmas time! I love my boys and I love how the decorate the tree by putting everything in one spot. I'm so happy it's this time of year!!

Word of the Year: Strength

I haven't been very good about posting thoughts on my word for the year. The word I had chosen was strength. I think that this word had a huge impact on my life this past year though. I'm every day amazed at the strength that I have found in myself to press forward and climb the mountains that I didn't think I could. I feel like everything I've been though was a lifetime ago. I haven't been to therapy for a full week. I was sick last week and cancelled both appointments and now looking back it seems as if it's all a distant memory. That was the OLD me and this is the NEW me. And I couldn't be happier. 

While chatting with a good friend and browsing on Pinterest for Christmas party ideas, I came across this. It seemed to be the perfect words of advice to offer her, and the perfect way to round out my year. Yes I know there is still a month to go....in fact I think I might officially end the year with a collage, but for now...

My Brother's Wedding

Here are the highlights of my night! 

My boys finally got to meet Sonny face to face. They've skyped but that's it. My brother and his sweet wife were so thoughtful in asking their friends to please not bring their children so that these three little men could become acquainted with each other. It worked like a charm and they were inseparable all night. 

I haven't seen my Nana in nine years. Isn't she gorgeous! I can only hope that I look as stunning as her when I have great grand-children.

The wedding party

Horrible picture of me, but I'm posting anyway because I love my brother so much and I'm so thankful to be a part of his special day. Look at that happy face of his. He was absolutely glowing all night. I've never seen him so happy before.

I actually had to interrupt the moment to get this picture. They were blocked by the cake, and no one could see their faces. Totally worth it!

This was taken immediately after he said to me, "I not being naughty"

In the front entryway they had this large picture for guests to sign. As you can see, Lucas found the marker and wrote his name across the top! Not so secretly I think it's the cutest thing ever! And I know my brother well enough to know that he will treasure that. Also, he wrote his last name fairly large down the left side. Ha.

We even got a few family pictures.

This is my favorite one.

I raised these boys when they were babies. And now they are 14 and 16 and so stinkin handsome! I can hardly believe it. I wish I would have had more time to catch up with them. (PS...Texas humidity is NOT good for my hair)

I think we all look horrible in this picture, but who cares....sibling love!

Partial family picture. This was because several people tried to get in on our sibling picture and we had to kick them out. From left to right:

Ben, brother Sam. Me. Brother Billy. Mom. Nana and Tom.

Our good family friend Jae did all the floral arrangements as a gift to the couple. She did an amazing job on them and sent me home with this gorgeous bouquet of roses. This is sadly the only picture I took of it. I snapped this before getting in the car in case anything happened to it.

What a wonderful night full of wonderful memories. And I had my husband and two little boys there to share it with me. So happy!

Food Drive

Sometime last month, there was a commercial on TV asking for help with food donations for our local food bank. Lucas decided he wanted to help, and so he did! I took it to our facebook group for homeschoolers and over the course of our next few playdates, we collected three large boxes of food. I took him this past week to the food pantry to make the donation, and it was so sweet all the people working there coming up and thanking him for this thoughtfulness. There were many families inside waiting for their turn at accepting their share, and so he was able to see first hand some of the people that he possibly helped to feed. 

I feel so incredibly blessed to have a child that has such a huge heart. He is always thinking of the best interest of others. He wants to help everyone he sees that is in need. We can't financially offer much help to those around us, but we can help in other ways and I'm so proud of my little man for starting out young! I know he will grow up to do wonderful things with his life and be a wonderful member of society.

Trunk-or-Treat #2

The Saturday before Halloween was our ward party. I'm lame and didn't take very many pictures. The kids had fun. I have more pictures that need to be scanned, they're family photos that were taken there...and I promise they are worth the wait!

Trunk-or-Treat #1

The week before Halloween we went to Ethan's ward Trunk-or-Treat. We were super late, but it was worth it because Jeremy got to go with us! We LOVE having him join us on our outings, because it's very rare. 

This year Benjamin decided on being a rocket, Lucas was Optimus Prime and Ethan was a ninja.

We love daddy! He sat in the back of the Richey's car and passed out candy with Brian. I know that Amy and I were both feeling so blessed to have our husbands with us.

Checking out the loot

Happy sugared up little boy!

Randoms

Sometimes the boys sharing a room is difficult at bedtime. So sometimes, we let Lucas fall asleep in our room so Benjamin can't torment him.This particular night, things got quiet in a hurry and Jeremy and I went looking for the boy.

He was completely buried, with the exception of a small breathing hole. He even tucked Fluffee in next to him.

It's the little moments in life that make it so wonderful.

Baby Sara

I'm a bad blogger. Sara will be six weeks old tomorrow and I'm just posting about her. Friday October 5th was one of the longest days of my life knowing that she would be born very early and it would very late before I would be able to go meet her. She was totally worth the wait though. Beautiful and TINY and sweet as could be.

Excuse my appearance, I had just gotten out of the shower...wet hair and all)

The following week we headed up to Amy's house to so that Lucas and Benjamin could meet her. They were going CRAZY not getting to hold her. And just as suspected, it was love at first sight for both boys.

Benjamin would rather sit and hold Sara than play with the big kids.

Lucas wanted to bring her home with us...me too!

Hannah has always been adorable, but having a baby sister made her a hundred times cuter! She loved the little princess wand the boys brought for her as a big sister present.

Aruging Is Pointless

I LOVED this article from Fox Business. It had me cracking up and thinking all at the same time. Read it all the way through and really think about what he is saying..... you might just find yourself wanting to argue less! 

It was lunchtime and the seven of us — two kids and five adults — would be in the car for the next three hours as we drove from New York City to upstate Connecticut for the weekend.
We decided to get some takeout at a place on the corner of 88th and Broadway. I pulled along the curb and ran in to get everyone's orders.
In no time, Isabelle, my eight year old, came running in the restaurant.
"Daddy! Come quick! The police are giving you a ticket!"
I ran outside.
"Wait, don't write the ticket, I'll move it right away," I offered.
"Too late," she said.
"Come on! I was in there for three minutes. Give me a break."
"You're parked in front of a bus stop." She motioned halfway down the block.
"All the way down there?" I protested.
She said nothing.
"You can't be serious!" I flapped my arms.
"Once I start writing the ticket, I can't stop." She handed me the ticket.
"But you didn't even ask us to move! Why didn't you ask us to move?" I continued to argue as she walked away.
And that's when it hit me: arguing was a waste of my time.
Not just in that situation with that police officer. I'm talking about arguing with anyone, anywhere, any time. It's a guaranteed losing move.
Think about it. You and someone have an opposing view and you argue. You pretend to listen to what she's saying but what you're really doing is thinking about the weakness in her argument so you can disprove it. Or perhaps, if she's debunked a previous point, you're thinking of new counter-arguments. Or, maybe, you've made it personal: it's not just her argument that's the problem. It's her. And everyone who agrees with her.
In some rare cases, you might think the argument has merit. What then? Do you change your mind? Probably not. Instead, you make a mental note that you need to investigate the issue more to uncover the right argument to prove the person wrong.
When I think back to just about every argument I've ever participated in — political arguments, religious arguments, arguments with Eleanor or with my children or my parents or my employees, arguments about the news or about a business idea or about an article or a way of doing something — in the end, each person leaves the argument feeling, in many cases more strongly than before, that he or she was right to begin with.
How likely is it that you will change your position in the middle of fighting for it? Or accept someone else's perspective when they're trying to hit you over the head with it?
Arguing achieves a predictable outcome: it solidifies each person's stance. Which, of course, is the exact opposite of what you're trying to achieve with the argument in the first place. It also wastes time and deteriorates relationships.
There's only one solution: stop arguing.
Resist the temptation to start an argument in the first place. If you feel strongly about something in the moment, that's probably a good sign that you need time to think before trying to communicate it.
If someone tries to draw you into an argument? Don't take the bait. Change the subject or politely let the person know you don't want to engage in a discussion about it.
And if it's too late? If you're in the middle of an argument and realize it's going nowhere? Then you have no choice but to pull out your surprise weapon. The strongest possible defense, guaranteed to overcome any argument:
Listening.
Simply acknowledge the other and what he's saying without any intention of refuting his position. If you're interested, you can ask questions — not to prove him wrong — but to better understand him.
Because listening has the opposite effect of arguing. Arguing closes people down. Listening slows them down. And then it opens them up. When someone feels heard, he relaxes. He feels generous. And he becomes more interested in hearing you.
That's when you have a shot of doing the impossible: changing that person's mind. And maybe your own. Because listening, not arguing, is the best way to shift a perspective.
Then, when you want to leave the conversation, say something like,"Thanks for that perspective." Or "I'll have to think about that," and walk away or change the subject.
I'm not saying you should let someone bully you. This weekend I was in a long line and someone cut in front of me. I told him it wasn't okay and he started yelling, telling me — and the people around me — that he was there all the time, which was clearly not true. I began to argue with him which, of course, proved useless and only escalated the fight.
Eventually a woman in the line simply drew a boundary. She said, "No, it's not okay to simply walk in here when the rest of us are waiting" and she stepped forward and ignored the bully. We all followed her lead and, eventually, he went to the back of the line.
Arguments: 0. Boundaries: 1.
When I went online to pay the parking fine, I tried to dispute the ticket. Before arguing my case though, a screen popped up offering me a deal: pay the penalty with a 25% discount, or argue and, if I lose, pay the entire fine. I thought I had a good case so I argued and, a few weeks later, lost the case.
Next time, I'm taking the deal.

Art

I love Lucas' art! I think it's so darn cute. This was a math test where he had to show three cars minus two cars. He drew a picture of three cars. Love it!!!

Day 1

*I have a lot to be thankful for, so why not jump on board with this fun November tradition. 

Today I'm thankful for a stellar therapist. Thankful that I've made as much progress as I have in the past seven months. And gratify to have made it to a point in my life where I can forgive and move forward.

I Feel So Free...

This morning I took my final step in my own healing process. I took the letter I wrote to my abuser and read it to Norman. It's a good three pages long, and I'm normally really reserved about reading things I've written out loud, but this morning when I was ready to tell him that I'd written it, I just let go. I sat there on that brown couch, reading a letter to my abuser out loud for the third time. You see, I've already read the letter to my abuser twice, out loud. I wanted to make sure they heard me loud and clear. But for some reason, reading it in front of Norman was different. 

Right toward the end, I got misty eyed. That had not happened while writing it or reading it previously. And when I finished reading and looked up, I saw that Norman had tears in his eyes too. And the most amazing thing for me was when all he could say was, "Wow." I just sat there soaking up the moment. It would be impossible for me to put into words how wonderful it felt to have accomplished something so extremely difficult. 

Norman went on to tell me that it was the most profound letter that he had heard all year, maybe even ever. And he was obviously very proud of me for making it this far. I couldn't have done it without him. I believe to the depths of my soul that I needed HIM. No one else would have done the job. 

For months I've been so stressed out and worried about our pending move in May. Worried that I couldn't continue on without being able to see Norman every week, or twice a week, like I have been for the past few months. But now I can look myself in the mirror and I know that I'm strong enough. I grew a back bone and I can face the world head on. No one will ever have that kind of control and power over me again...EVER! 

I said before that I can't put into words how I feel, but to give a sampling...

 I feel:

EMPOWERED

BRAVE

STRONG

COURAGEOUS

I feel full of:

HOPE

LIFE

POSSIBILITY

WONDERFUL

AMAZING

DESERVING

I not longer feel:

tension

stress

guilty

negativity

But mostly, I just feel free. Free from bondage, free from pain. I just feel free, and it is the most glorious feeling in the world!