Kebarangkalian...

I am testing my memory on the possibilities. Last used when studied Calculus i think. Okay, the numbers are 5,9,8,7,3 and I confident it started with 5 and end with 3….

5 _ _ _ 3 58973 58793 59783

Tested and all wrong! Okay, maybe it started with 5 and ends with 7, because these sets sound familiar to me too.

59387 59837 58397

OK, wrong again…. Maybe it stated with 9 and ends with 3.

95783 98357 95387

OK here I go again.. and it’s failed! Failed! And failed! Happy now? Hahah aku marah sape ni? ;P

*Sigh!

I forgot my password after long weekend - Nway, Happy Deepavali to those who celebrate. It was glued in my head and I really don’t understand why suddenly I can forget the 5 digits which are always on my mind and I type it almost 3-4 times a day. I am getting old, I know. I did try many ways to retrieve it back but none matched. I also did try possibilities, but no success too. After 3 days trying, I gave up. I will inform my team lead in State and tell him the truth.

Hi XXX, I have problem to log-in into system, because I accidentally forgot my password. Things happen right? Hahaha.. I hope you don’t mind to resend me my password again. Appreciate it so much. Sorry for the trouble caused. Regards, Zurah.

OK I admit, this is my stupid mistake. But things happen right? Saje nak sedapkan ati niii… huhuhuh…Lesson learned. Don’t fully trust your brain memory, sometimes it is not working, I mean the memory, not the brain. And don't ignore your instinct when it about to tell you something. Actually the note where the password written was on my handbag. I saw it everyday, and I have the instinct that I will lost it. It seems to call me, asking me to keep it in other safer place but I was too stupid to ignore the siren. And last Tuesday, I forgot the password and I was looking for it like hell, and I couldn't find it. Padan muke sangat kan? I had checked all my handbags and my laptop bag, but nothing. Hmmm.. so sad.

Cloth Diaper

Dear Lovely Mommies who read my blog, Am thinking to CD-ing Zaim - next year; at least for half day. I wonder if it is too late for me? From all the brands, I think only 1 that win my heart... Yeah, am loyal-to-1-brand person. ;P Organic Bum Genius - One Size, All-In-One. Any personal opinions for me? So how many should I buy for a start? Please help. Thanks and Regards, Zurah

"Baby...."

• Normally, at nite, before going to bed, i will spend about one hour talking to my Zaim - his babytalk. I only understand some words, but the rest I just layan jelah dia... One day, while we talked, he suddenly sit and face me...

• Zaim: Memi...Memi...
• Mommy: Yes sayang...
• Zaim: Nak!
• Mommy: Zaim nak ape?
• Zaim: Baby...
• Mommy: (Puzzled! Sejak bile lak dia pandai cakap baby? Tau ke dia baby tu ape? Dia seriyes ke ni?? ... ) -laugh-
• Zaim: -laugh too-Memi, nak! Nak baby!
• Mommy: Zaim nak baby ape?
• Zaim: Memi nak baby... (he keep repeating this...)
• Mommy: Okay, next year ek mommy bagi baby. Now zaim sleep ok?
• Zaim: -smile-
• Mommy: ... speechless...

• Also, during bed time, he suddenly meniarap on my body. His head is on my chest. So I sing him a song, selawat and all. Then he head up straight to my face...

• Zaim: Baby...
• Mommy: Ok.. Zaim baby mommy... Sayang baby mommy...
• Zaim: Memi.. Baby..
• Mommy: Zaim nak baby ke?
• Zaim: Nak!
• Mommy: -cant help laughing-
• Zaim: -laugh too-

• Again, another bedtime, I sleep with him in my bed. I hug him tight from his back. Then after a while, I lay down straighten my body as I thought he already fall asleep. Without I realized, my t-shirt terselak sket, showing up my belly. Zaim moved, and smile to me.

• Zaim: Baby... (with suare paling manjeeee...)
• Mommy: Hahaha.. mane baby?
• Zaim: -smile and finger to my belly.-
• Mommy: Zaim nak baby?
• Zaim: -smile again. then he stand up and kiss my belly.- ... Baby.
• Mommy: Babah.... Zaim nak adik!

Hmmmm I wonderlah, where he learn all this? Is it himself or he's remembering babies in his nursery? And I am so curious, since when he knows baby stay in mommy's belly? Seingat aku, I only say baby if there is any baby infront us, and I will ask Zaim to kiss the baby. But I never introduce him the concept of pregnancy yet... He keep repeating this frequently especially when I am alone with him. Is it the sign for next baby? Hahaha...

Family-Bed to Big-Kid-Bed Transition @ 15mos

It's has been more than a week, Zaim's transition from sleep-sharing to sleep alone. Out of 9 days, 4 nights he successfully sleep til morning in his own bed. While the rest nights, he wakes me up, to pick him up into my bed especially after he finished his night feeding. For the 1st 2 nights, I am so pity with him, as he maybe experiencing separation anxiety (maybe me too... hehehe). So I allowed him to sleep with me again. But then I don't want him to make this as habit, so I just ignore him when he wakes me up in the middle of the night. But he did not gave up, he climb himself into my bed and find his very own space in the middle of mommy and babah. Kacau daun lah...hahahaha ~Sigh*

Our Saturday...

Hmmm... seronok juge kalo celebrate birthday kat A&W ek. It has special room, in here kids are free to play the game. The MC & Bear are friendly too. They play and dance lotsa games and most of the kids enjoyed it very much, except Zaim and few other babies. I think because the music quite loud for their ages. But when they turn the music off, Zaim la hero nye... ;P Anyway, Happy 3rd Birthday to cutie Aisya Batrisya. Sorry we arrived lil bit late - traffic jammed. Too many people buat openhouse, so many people atas jalan. ;(

2nd Tag!

• Apakah benda yang paling penting dalam hidup kamu?

Money! I sound materialistic right? But, am rasional hahaha... Without money I can't buy my other important things such as Zaim's diapers, susu, foods, laptop, handbags, shoes and clothes...

• Apakah benda terakhir yang kamu beli dengan wang sendiri?

My lunch - Mihun tomyam thai.

• Di manakah tempat impian perkahwinan kamu?

My parent's house and impian sudah jadi kenyataan. No other places yang lebih meriah!

• Berapa lama anda rasa hubungan kamu berkekalan?

Forever... InsyaAllah ;)

• Adakah anda di lamun cinta?

Ya! Every single day with my 2 boyfriends! ;P

• Di manakah restoran terakhir kamu makan malam?

Keramat - dekat dengan workshop Bie.

• Namakan buku terakhir kamu beli.

Words, Colours and Numbers for Zaim.

• Apakah nama penuh kamu?

Norbaidzurah Samad

• Kamu lebih senang dengan mak atau ayah?

Ayah. Lebih pendiam tapi memahami... ;P

• Namakan seseorang yang kamu ingin jumpa untuk pertama kalinya dalam hidup anda?

Angelina Jolie ahaks!!

• Christina atau Britney?

Britney hahaha.. coz I bought her CDs mase muda muda dulu!

• Adakah kamu mencuci pakaian anda sendiri?

Hurmm.. yes, am the one who put it in the machine, and switch it on.. - if it is count ;).

• Tempat yang paling seronok kamu mahu pegi?

UK

• Pelukan atau ciuman?

Big Hug!

• Butirkan 5 perkara tentang orang yang tag kamu.

1. Rajin buat homework & pandai mase sekolah dulu
2. Body still slim and maintain!
3. Orang Johor
4. Study kat Jepun
5. BF and CD her baby Sufira

(Lame gile tak jumpeeee niiii… So tau ni pun berdasarkan memori daun pisang mase kat MRSM dulu, and whatever updated kat her blog… )

• 8 perkara yang amat saya gilai-

1. Zaim!
2. Shopping and online shopping or window shopping dengan Has - my partner in crime!!
3. Shoes
4. Handbags
5. Clothes
6. Food
7. Beach
8. Interior Design

• 8 perkataan yang sering di ucapkan

1. Ek?
2. Yeke?
3. Ohhh
4. Alaaaaa
5. Hish
6. Zaim
7. Bie
8. No

• 8 buah buku yang paling terbaru dibaca

All by Sophie Kinsella – erkk tak cukup 8! And few more workflow books

• 8 lagu yang saya boleh dengar berulang kali.

I can repeated listen to any song as long as tak bingit or menyakitkan telinga..

1. All Barney's songs
2. Lagu raya
3. Misha (Bie sukeee dgr…)
4. Indon Band
5. Boyband
6. Britney ahaks!
7. Kire lebih dari 8 dah la kan???

• 8 perkara yang saya pelajari tahun lalu

I have to admit, last year, not so many things I learned, except learned how to take care of my lil baby, handling baby when he sick and all. But this year, I learned a lot.

1. I learned how to make pineapple tart,
2. and cook few new recipes.
3. At office, I work with new assignments, Workflow and Interface.
4. Facebooking
5. Wearing a shawls! I like!
6. Conference call from home using Webex
7. hmmm I can't recall any other... ;P

Bringing up Zaim

After reading my friend's blog, I decided to create this entry, purposely to share about my experience bringing up my lil boy, Zaim. But mainly I will talk about my breastfeed experience. Yeah, I am one of the mommy who failed to BF my baby until he reached 2 years old. Sad? Of course I am. But, every time I felt sad and regret thinking bout it, I will then switch my mind to recall those factors that made me failed, which I believe Allah had decided it for me. Since we were attending antenatal class in Hospital Pusrawi, KL, i had set my mind to BF my baby. I learned a lot of knowledge and guide from the nurses. I am proud with Pusrawi since they really support BF eventho it is a private hospital. When Zaim was born, I first start to BF him in labour room, about an hour he was out from my belly. The feeling, I cant describe with words. I still remember how his mouth struggling to find my nipple. ;) He looks so hungry. ;) And when he got it, he just knew how to suck it. And I can feel the milk flows out. While we were in hospitals, during the day, mommies will need to BF their babies at breastfeeds room. Here, the nurses will help us how to BF babies correctly. Position and all. Too bad at that time Zaim prefer to sleep than drink. I had tickle him everywhere but he just don't want to wake up. I always return back to room sadly and feel a bit frustrated. And yeah, the milk started to produce like mad and the baby refuse to clear it up. So, with nurse's advice, she suggest me to pump my milk and store it in hospital. She will give it to Zaim when Zaim wants it. So I mostly spend my time expressing my milk and watching other mommies BF their baby. To ease my situation, Bie went to OneUtama to buy me a Medela mini electric pump, complete with few bottles for storage and thermal bag. We had eyeing this brand since I was 4mos pregnant. So, he knows what to buy. So i don't need to express my milk in the BF room. We stayed about 5 days there, because Zaim was infected by jaundice. When we returned home, I only managed to fully BF Zaim for 2months. Then I need to go back to work. This is when I start to partially gave Zaim FM because I cant provide enough stock for him. The most I can pump per day are only about 12-15oz with 3 sessions. But during the day, Zaim needs about 4oz every 1 and half hour, which equals to 32oz. It was a tough job I can say. With meetings, whole-days trainings, and workloads, attached with soon-to-go-live project and all. It really challenging for me. But I keep tried my best. At nite, I gave him fully BF. Zaim was such a good baby. We hardly to hear his cry except when he was hungry. Alhamdulillah, I don't have such difficulties taking care of him as I heard some of my friends need to handle all-day-crying baby. But Allah tested me with other things, Zaim was easily sick. At least once a month he will be infected by flu, cough or fever. Yeah that's common when for nursery baby. ;( The worst, he was warded when he was 4 mos. I am really worried. We did took a very good care of him, until one day I was then infected too, and warded too. At this time, my body was sooooo weak, low blood pressure and all. Taking care of sick lil boy with me as well sick was a very tough job. Zaim refuse to BF me as he hardly breath during BF as his nose were blocked. And my milk slowly decrease. We had been warded for 2 weeks. It was a nightmare for me. Then when we both recovered, I have a problem to start BF him again. He's not satisfied with my milk, and I myself realized sometimes he gets nothing. I tried to pump but the most I can get is 2oz in 1 session. At this stage, Zaim needs 6oz every 1 hour. Yeah, too far for me to achieve that. I tried a few petua, lobak putih, ikan tenggiri, plain water and all. But it seems not working for me. Then when he reached 6 mos, I stopped BF Zaim. Yeah, that's my story. And to add, Zaim was warded 3 times within the 2 months gap. So imagine myself at time. Tired. Tense. Work. Sick. Depress. Sometimes, I do offer him (just in case he might want it... ) but Zaim smile to me, and make his shy face. He did tried but then hide his face. Seems like he so shy - too big for BF ke I am not sure why he was acting like that. This is how I failed my mission to fully BF Zaim. I do feel sad, thinking bout this, thinking how I am so all-out to BF my lil boy, but I keep remind myself, all the tough time I had faced when we were at hospital, I am redha with this. Allah had gave me another reward, Zaim is such a healthy boy today. That's more meaningful to me.

So my message here, to those mommies who failed to BF, do not give up and feel down. We can try again next time - unless u only want 1 kid ;P And I think it is good to learn from those who success to fully BF. Share with them, they might help you. Go grab some reading materials. And to daddies, support your wifey. It is not easy to BF. They need you, your help and support. Help them feed your baby. I remember how pain was my back after BF Zaim straight 5 hours non-stop. And Bie, did put some balm to relief the pain. That's enough for woman to feel appreciated. ;) And lastly, don't forget - doa to Allah. InsyaAllah. - I HOPE I CAN BREASTFEED MY NEXT BABY -erkkkk bile ni Bie nak kasik Zaim adik???? hehehe

...

terase tau!!!!! ;(

my turn ;( - i hate wednesday...

Yeah, it is my turn to go back at work. Am purposely taking extra 2 days to kill the blues but it still come. instead of Monday blues, now it is Wednesday blues... haiyak! memang berat betul nak bangun rasenye... guess what, i woke up @ 9.30am and arrived @ 11am. Hmm... suppose i need to be in office @ 9.00am. samseng betol kan??? ;P

• So what did i do in these past 2 days... 1st, sent zaim to nursery for half day. because normally after long holiday stayed with me, zaim moody sket kalo hantar nursery. Berjurai-jurai airmata... so that's why i need to slowly tell zaim that he need to go back to nursery. On Monday, he almost cried when Babah send him there. When we picked him up, Zaim cried when he saw me. Merajuk giless with mommy dia... Whole nite, grumpy semacam. Muke toye btol. Midnight baru ok balik - baru nak start gelak-gelak, senyum senyum mcm biase balik. But yesterday, when we picked him up, he is happy as usual. He excited when he saw me and as usual shouted, "Mi! Mi! Mama!" then gave me a big hug... yeay! Lega sket hati... He can adapt back to his routine.

• 2nd, I was busy making Bie his tart nenas. 1 batch dah selamat habis before raya... So I decided to make 2nd and 3rd batch. Because once i start my work, I dont think I am able to make him the tart. So have to prepare enough stock for him. Dia makan tart macam makan nasik. *LOL Now pon dah habis half.. ish ish ish... perut ape la dia niii... ;P Btw, some tips updated kat resipi pineapple tart haritu...

• And, what else I did. Oh, I did some shopping for lil Zaim. He got a few more books and toys. He bored with the ol ones. Me and my family memang tak tahan sakit perut nak gelak, kesian pun ade when he start his boring face @ home and also when he do funny act and voices, purposely to show he was so demn boring. Tetiba je tergolek pusing-pusing terlentang kat carpet. One time tu, he talk with himself depan dinding. Sometimes, buat bunyi macam orang asli... Kalo boring sangat main kejar-kejar sorang-sorang... Lari ke depan, pastu pusing-pusing sampai pening. Then terjatuh. Gelak dekah2.. Pastu lari ke dapur. Pusing2 lagi. Jatuh. Pastu purposely hit the cabinet and all. And then buat buat pengsan. Then ttbe pulak solat. Kekeke.. So mommy kene la make some new investment. Susah juga nak carik toys yang suitable for him. Coz we need to find toys that suitable with his development, not too advance. I planned for more activities with this easily-get-bored boy. So what am gonna do is, spending more time with him reading, drawing and swimming. Also i am about to teaches him shapes. He kinda start to catch up with shapes. Previously when i teaches him how to put the block in its own shapes, he doesn't look interested at all. I repeated few times but he doesn't seems get the idea. But one day, when i watched him play alone, he did copy what i did before with his own... I'm pretty impressed. So i just watch him from far, he did quite good job. I just bought another shapes blocks, well let me see if he can do well with this one too...

• And the most happiest for me is, i found Zaim's bed. I think Zaim needs his own bed now. He's too old to sleep with me. He start to sleep with me when he was too big for his cot. Always bump on his head. Berdentang-detum bunyi terantuk. Kesian. I let him sleep alone at sofa bed, but midnite, he wakes up asked me to take him up to my bed. I've been searching all around for almost 6 months, to get suitable bed for him. Actually it is an extenable bed from Ikea but the price is almost RM700 including mattress. Gilo! My sis bought a similar type, during clearance sale from Ebay for about only RM280 including bed side tables. So i struggle to find one for Zaim with that price. Alhamdulillah, i managed to find the factory, and guess what, we get the bed for only RM215. Cool? Yeah! Exactly. Why pay more at Ikea when u get the same thing here. I mean here exactly the same bed. Except the mattress, not so cool like Ikea one, but enough said it is comfy for your kid. Anyone interested let me know. I give you the number. ;) But before that pray that I get mine on this coming Friday.

Okay, I have to say goodbye to all coz I need to work la darls! Tomorrow morning I have conference meeting. I need to update my works status. So need to get some work done today. Hmm.. oh ya... I planning for OpenHouse this coming Saturday. Well let me see if I am able to prepare stuff and food for the OpenHouse. Or else, postpone to next week or maybe korang datang jela anytime you like.. hehe.. And lastly, on serious note, I have a doubt, I do sometimes bored working Offshore, and I want to go Onshore - to expand my career. I think I am quite ready to go, but I don't want to leave my boy. And of course my hubby. Somehow I need to sort my career path and my life so I can bring them along if I am going to Onshore. Even for a week. I will not go without them. I hope the opportunity will come at the right time. But for now, I have to say NO for the opportunity... ;( So sad... Pray for me I can sort this soon... But yeah, family comes first and always be my priority. Without them, I am nothing. - thanks for reading my bebel-bebel... -

Eid 2008

Am back!

Alhamdulillah. Safely arrived @ KL last night. As usual, raya is always tiring for me. Been here and there. Busy visiting relatives as many as we can, both sides. Today, am just stayed @ home, help mom kemas rumah, tukar langsir, basuh baju, entertaining guests and all. And now, am suffering headache and stomachache. Too much eat and travel, too less sleep and rest, I guess. Looks how many miles that we had travel? Convert to KM.. you do the math! ;P