I never have regrets. I never make the wrong move. Or so i claimed. Looks like i was wrong. terribly.

For something the pragmatic people will say is important, I missed out on many things which I really feel is important.

Which is why, I sort of hate facebook.

Every photo, every comment, they painfully remind me what I have missed out and what I have lost. Ultimately you realise, friends and company are the ones who can give you warmth, not the cold hard notes and papers.

what are results? they are but just like drugs. they bring you away from your friends, they (might) create shortlived happiness and leave you wanting for more. finally when you see their worthlessness, its too late. and its not even a promise. its days and nights of worrying and feeling helpless.

I’m just worried/helpless turned angry. that’s all.

They say, 1% of success is luck. If only I had that 1% of luck. or why not just 0.5%. if not, just give me a downright disgusting grade, because I hate to be so close.

writing block continues, i think brains all screamed and teleported to outerspace when i told them i really need to get that few tonnes of info to stay in my head.

and anyway, i inserted my dental screws. as usual, i faced it on my own. in a way, its like doing another form of bungee jump. the thrill of overcoming the fear and accepting the challenge. conquering it makes me feel ready, at least for a while, to face the world, come what may.

When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
stuck in reverse

and the tears come streaming down your face
when you lose something you can't replace
when you love someone but it goes to waste
could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones
and I will try to fix you




These things happen to almost anyone, but songs made them sound so emo. i wonder why.
but oh well, the song is nice...

I hope i did the right thing.