Monday, May 28, 2007
Long long day for me today. It felt long for me anyway cos most of my lessons finished early and I couldn't leave cos I didn't wanna skip anymore classes. Worse thing is the last lesson of the day ended late. How ironic!!! School started at 12pm today. No sem pro. Lucky me but I somehow still overslept. I realised I never really got a chance to get a good rest ever since I started working. Its like I have to get up at 6.30am everyday cos I start school at 8am except Tuesdays. Then on weekends I gotta get up at 6.30am AGAIN cos I start work at 8am. On school days I spend extra 15mins 'trying' to get up so it more or less adds up. I only take 20mins to get to school.
I finished at 5pm but stayed on a lil longer to hang around with my friends who just got back from attachment and doing their FYP now. Surprisingly, I WANTED to go home. I didn't really want to stay out. Maybe a lil but not as much. I was bored though so I just watched loads of TV. I realised I'm more entertained by the commercials. Like some kid who watches TV just to look at commercials. I feel damn deprieved. HAHA!
Though I start at 10am tomorrow, I still gotta get up at 6plus cos I have checkup at 8am! AARGH! Damn it! I was supposed to go to Coffee Bean to chill with Rudy and March but Rudy changed his mind and March was coming from school and would only be there at 9plus, which is about this time. He'd probably just drop by for awhile so no point going down... ALONE!
So anyway, I was thinking of resigning at Ritz. Just feel really drained. As I was saying, I haven't had a good rest for too long. I want to be able to wake up at 12pm and not worry about anything and just go back to sleep and go out to meet my friends in the late afternoon and just hang out till late at night. That'd be really nice. It'll be even better if I could just go to the beach and sleep the afternoon sun away with that special someone.
Well, I guess I'll try to sleep early tonight and get enough rest.
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
I had a real bad day today...
Lessons at 10am but I woke up at 9.45am. Damn! I slept at 4am the night before cos I was up doing the presentation for today. I thought I just lay on my bed for awhile then wake up to pack my stuff and get ready for tomorrow. However, I was just too tired. I woke up thanks to my dear friend who called me just in time, if not I would have been later and our presentation would have been screwd. Its funny how I'm never early during this kinda semi-important stuff.
Well, in the end, all the rushing was for nothing. We presented last -.- HAHA! I felt like a total idiot walking around school in formal wear. I should have brought some clothes to change. Attracted too much unwanted attention...
After school, I met Ruz at hilltop. We tried and tried and TRIED! We just had some mega bullshit problem with the network. We weren't able to play anything together until Dan came. The IT expert. HAHA! Think its just the AURA!
Played till we had enough as we haven't played for quite a while. Tired but happy. Dang! School at 8am! 4 more hours of sleep...
Its funny how the people/things you want most to be with/have is always out of your reach. Maybe not. Its never really placed there right in front of you for taking. Somehow, you'll have to do something about it. Lose something before gaining. Thats rubbish! HAHA! I think I'm typing nonsense but somewhere in that sentence proves a point. I think, hope... I'm sure I'm entitled to every amount of attention...
I just wish for something to happen. Be it good OR bad. It'll make my life more interesting.
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Promise not to fade away(again)?
Don't let me let you go
Sunday, May 20, 2007
Stop living in that little world of yours and look around! Wake up! You're going round and round in circles and frankly, aren't you tired? Always dilly dally. You can't seem to make up that mind of yours can't you? Simple decision. Do, or don't do. Is it that hard? Why do you keep procrastinating??? I seriously don't get it. Up till now!
You play mind games, he play mind games. Your mom says no but yet you still go ahead with it. You LIE to your dad? You don't lie! Now you lie about him??? I really want you to be happy, I really do, be it with or without him, I'll support you. UNTIL NOW, you STILL haven't really come to a decision. WHY? Whats stopping you from being with him? Whats stopping you from NOT being with him? You can tell me all the things he can do/not do to make you go all mushy but then again you can turn around and say thats hes the worst person in the world. Whats with you??? Get it sorted out! Get it all sorted out! Stop wasting your life away like that. If you really think hes the one you wanna spend the rest of your life with, then by all means, go ahead, MAKE him OBEY you. Make him your slave. Leave him hanging by a thread! Take it all. Take all of him! Make him all yours and YOURS only. If not, stop wasting your life and move on! Think of him as just 'another one' of those guys. Then, just totally not contact him or think about him. If he bothers you, I'll personally do something about it, be it whether you have any more feelings for him. Once you made it clear that hes just 'another one' of those guys, I WILL do something about it!
Saturday, May 19, 2007
Monday
Ok, I just went for an op, some surgery to remove my wisdom teeth and 4 others. In total, I removed 8 teeth! The feeling of being put to sleep was great. I couldn't remember a thing until I woke up with my mouth all numb. I couldn't move my lips and my tongue. I was told to take the pain killers but the damn pill didn't want to move through my damn mouth. It just sat there, literally.
It didn't hurt at first cos my mouth was still numb all the way till 4 in the afternoon on Monday. I had the op at 8 in the morning. At about 2, I could feel my lips and tongue but my cheeks were still a lil numb. I was craving for Hong Kong noodles though I wasn't sure I could chew yet. I thought just give it a try. However, my Dad bought HONG KONG wantan noodles! -.- The noodles were too hard. I took a bite and didn't feel like eating the rest of it. It was hard and it tasted horrible. Not that I don't appreciate my Dad buying lunch for me but I would rather not have him buy it in the first place. I ate bread and ham in the end to satisfy my hunger.
Tuesday
Nothing much happened just that I met Rudy for coffee at coffee bean. We went to see Qim. Oh Dan, sorry about that. Pump it! Apart from that, I just survived on pain killers while I reluctantly went to school. I had to! Yeah, thats about how my Tuesday went.
Wednesday
I was still surviving on the pain killers cos I didn't wanna have to suffer that much. I was taking less of it anyway. I Dota-ed with Ruz till 3 plus. His damn laptop was screwd. Problem with the networking. We couldn't connect so we just did our own stuff. I even went to the gym with Dan and March after that. Thing is, they said I looked the same, unless I opened my mouth then they would have probably noticed the missing teeth. Had dinner and Capcom. Can't really remember much. Probably cos nothing interesting happened.
Thursday
I love Thursdays! Shortest day of the week. Only 8am to 10am! Damn, I can't seem to remember what I did on Thursday. Probably went out with Dan and March and Capcom. AH! Hack it. Friday is the interesting one...
Friday
Got up real early and was 'supposed' to go to school but I stopped taking the pain killers, only cos there weren't any left, so the pain was a lil too much to bear. It stopped eventually around 1plus. I was making something to eat when I got a text msg from someone I haven't heard from for quite a while. Or at least the msg was weird. HAHA! Anyway, thats all confidential. Main thing is I went to the arcade with a special someone whom I haven't seen for quite a while and I really enjoyed myself. It was nice really. Its been soooo long! I met up with Ruz, Dan and March at the hilltop for Dota at 6plus. It was such a nice day for me. Everything just fell into place so nicely. Bought Nasi Lemak and Green tea and had our 'picnic' dinner over there. We played till about 10plus and left for home. Pretty early this time. We wanna start getting home early and having early bedtimes. Just some 'routine'. What for? That I don't know but it ain't something bad so... WHY NOT? Dan and I had work at 8am the next day anyway.
Saturday
Went to work and was there early... once again. I even had time to go to the canteen and have some Nasi Lemak(again). I still have some difficulty eating but I still finished on time. Work was fast, as in we finished our tasks fast and was almost asked to go back early. The amount of trolleys was quite a lot. Maybe cos Dan and I have been doing RC for too long and forgot what its like to do BC. Came home and changed to get ready to meet Dan. We capcom and had dinner at SA before heading down to March's house for FA cup. My prediction was right. 0-0 draw at 90min. However, Chelsea won =(
After all thats said and done, only one thing has been on my mind lately. I had much time to go think about it. I even thought about it while 'trying' to wake up after the op. I actually thought of her! Its funny how slight thoughts of her actually woke me up from my sleep. As in, I woke up on time. Its freaky really. Its no nightmare. Thats for sure, just more of a SURPRISED dream. If there even is such a thing.
HINT: R*****
Sunday, May 13, 2007
Its been a @$#&@#% week! I'll be gone now, for about a week or so. Not like anyone would notice. I'm that insignificant anyway. Why bother? I'm not sad, just mad really. The ones I loved being around ain't gonna be around. They never really were, well, most of them weren't. I really need someone, just one...
Tuesday, May 08, 2007
Busy busy busy
Everybodys busy
It ain't easy
No time to dilly dally
I missed the times
Which we all had fun
We didn't have to care
We just did what we want
Now its all different
All grown up
We gotta be independent
Can't depend on luck
I love my family
I couldn't ask for another
Though I don't say it
No one is a better father/mother
I miss my friends
Every single one of them
All the good and the bad
We'll last to the very end
Theres a special girl
Whos got me thinking real hard
I know now
Shes etched a spot in my heart
I have come to a decision to continue what I have been doing for the past 2 years or so. I thought why not just go on with it. Well, it makes people happy and I AM happy at the end. Everyone is happy. I read on Rach's blog that whether friends are just friends because they know each other for a very long time or they are friends cos they are REALLY friends, or something like that. That was what I understood from it. I thought to myself, are my friends really friends or just because of the long-term friendship? It was BOTH! We all have our strengths and weaknesses. Good and bad. Even in my darkest moments, the people I never thought that would be around was around. Its the long-term friendship thats keeping us together now. I hope the friendship never ends among us guys and we become better people and greater friends!
I just came home from school. Once again, no one is free until 5 in the evening. I wanna go swim and tan but the weather wasn't kind enough to let me. I guess I'll just go study a lil and pack my room. Somehow, its our bad habits that made us what we are. ALWAYS LATE. HAHA! At least we'll have something to look back and laugh about. Lets start making the memories!
Sunday, May 06, 2007
I feel confused. Yet again. Somehow it just comes back to haunt me. Am I living a lie? Am I adapting too easily to peoples' needs? Their wants? Their DESIRES? Why do I 'pretend' that everything is alright and just smile, well literally? I freaking wanna BLOW! Everythings NOT alright. I'm angry at the people I love MOST. I have been going through life with the "Live and let live" attitude. To a point, it actually WAS something good cos I didn't have to bother OR care about what happened to me or the people around at the end. Everyone just ended up happy. I had enough. I wanna say it but I'm gonna hold back just a lil more...
I just came back from work and now I hate elevators! I love my family. I love my friends. I love her. I just wanna go to sleep and wished I forgot all these when I wake.
Saturday, May 05, 2007
Woke at 6
Reluctantly
Work till 3
Was let off early
Met Rach for awhile
She didn't seem to smile
Burnt my hand
Its freaking pain
I'm gonna watch spiderman
with March and Dan
again
Have a tummyache
cuddled up in bed
Its causing a headache
I miss her
She supposed to call me back
Think she forgot
What the hack
Tummy's still hurting
Its almost time to get going
Should I venture further? Am I just making the same F***ing mistake all over again???
Then again... Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Should I go down that path again? I'm afraid. VERY! Once was more than enough. I only barely managed to pull through it. BARELY!
Thursday, May 03, 2007
Guess WHAT! I'm gonna watch Spiderman 3 again! WOO! Thanks Hannah! I love you girl!
I'm so freaking BORED!!! I was at home sleeping for 2 hours! I was supposed to meet Hannah for awhile. I didn't give her a definite answer so I guess she didn't stay long and left. I miss everyone! I miss my parents. I miss the guys. I miss all my friends!
I just went for a blood test. Damn! They took a lot of blood. One whole freaking TUBE. Why do they even need so much of my blood for? At first, I thought my blood wasn't coming out when I looked at the tube. Before I knew it, the nurse took out the band on my hand and had a whole FREAKING tube of my blood. It was about 6-7cm long!
It was raining heavily when I made my way there. Lessons were only from 8am till 10am so Thursdays are like free days for me. WOO! Theres a good and a bad thing about ending so early. Good cos I'm free and bad cos I've got no one to hang out with =( I got back to Bishan about 12plus and met Dan for lunch. That poor dude is sick, really sick. Inflammation of the throat. You better rest well and recover by Saturday. I don't wanna work alone with you-know-who.
So I'm hoping that there will be a hilltop session tomorrow...
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
Techno music in the cab all the way back from Kembangan to Bishan. From Ding-ding-ding-ding-ting-ting(crazy frog), to I-like-to-move-it-move-it to numa-numa-numa eh... AARGH! It was driving me crazy. Met Dan for supper and told him about my WONDERFUL day.
Went to catch Spiderman 3. Its wasn't that nice. Was expecting better. At the end of the show, you would probably say, "Huh, thats all?".