Off to M tomorrow... A new phase... Part of my 3 years poly studies... Attachment... Been looking forward to it, but now, I'm scare and nervous... Feel as if something bad is going to happen... Why should I be? Perhaps I'm just afraid to be out of my comfort zone... Maybe...

Arrrrrr......... I hate him!!! Why did he have to come back at this time? I should go out and study! Now, I am hoping mad!! How am I going to take the paper later??? Now, he's in the living room cursing and scolding me... Accusing me things that I had never done, putting words into my mouth... If he only stop here, I can tolerate... Telling myself that he's old, he dont know what he's talking... But..... He go around telling others. What others' think of me, our family???? The way others look at us is...... *sigh... My whole family is in a mess just because of him. Dont say neighbours, outsiders, even relatives dont believe us, treating us like thieves... What can I do, except to be in the room, complaining here?

Been having the runs till afternoon... Both above and below... Feeling weak now. Anyway, I am still here, alive... *grins Cant afford to be sick ar. Pouring tonnes and tonnes of water down my throat to replace the fluid that I've lost. Going to take the cold tablets before turning in. Hope I'll be better tomorrow. Glad that tomorrow paper is in the afternoon. At least I can revise in the morning... Ok, I better stop crapping here...

YES! YES! YES!
I've got in!!! Hee... Got into M for my 6 months attachment. Was worrying for almost a week man! Heard from my lecturer that I've got in. Haha... Hope it's really true. He's worse than me; more blur than me... No kidding, and to think he's a Dr. somemore... you know, my heart almost sank when Dr Ho asked me who else is Singaporean in the IAP class. I was thinking "Die lar, I cant get in liao. He's getting another person instead of me... No wonder, I got no news from M..." After telling him the list, I asked him "So, Dr Ho, they dont want me is it? My application failed so you are now looking for another Singaporean to go there?". (sound a bit rude????)Well, as expected, his first response was "Huh?". Haha... As usual... Anyway, it turned out that they need another IAP Singaporean student there. So, I might be getting accompany in the same company after all...

Finally... Finally... Finished the TQM project, I only left the printing part... A great relief... Havent been sleeping well... Slept less than 3 hours a day. Looking more and more like a panda. 5 people in the group only 2 people doing... Opps, Should I say everybody did their part? Just that they gave me rubbish... Haiz... Ought to be used to it already right? It's always been like that isnt it??? But, I just cant accept it... I'm slogging away for the project while they are at home studying for exams... So what you guys got ADs?? Brag that this kind of project can be easily done in a day. Ya, ya, ya, if I was to produce rubbish. Shouldnt complain anymore, it's never fair... Anyway, it's after all the last project and I've survived all this. An achievement??? Maybe...

Now that I'm done with this, I thought finally I can rest for a day.. But can I?? YM just called to ask me to help her with maths... Haiz... Cant turn her down. Cant let her fail right? She need to get at least 67 to pass. But my maths is no better. My grade is only average...

The only thing that I'm looking forward today is the dinner with Bel and Jiahui...

Feel the wind....
I was all drained out in school today... Faced the computer until I was "chased" out of the lab at 5.30pm. When I finally reached the void deck, I was shocked by what I saw... Felt so disgraced... Though I had heard from my mum regarding this but... I felt so.... Arrr.....

Got home, changed and went for a jog or rather, a run at the small hill nearby. Run, run, run... Leave all those things behind. Forget about the projects, the exams, what I saw, what he had done for the past few years... It feel great! Feel the wind, feel my heart beating so damn hard, feel the ache. Was panting so damn hard that I fear that I might get an attack. But oh well, I am still here, alive. Had a good, long cold bath after cooling down. Felt so much better... Guess this works better than eating all those junk food. But, this is so hard... Just couldnt resist the temptations....... Need determination...

I am now ready to face all those things again... Am I?? Hmmm...

Headache Headache....
My head is throbbing with pain... Finally reached home at 5pm yesterday after much torture... Pop in two Pandol Extra then went to bed. Woke up not feeling any better... Tonnes of things to do... Feel like crying when I saw what they send me for the project... This is going to be the worse project that I had done...

I HATE HIM!!!
He's the one who always bring trouble, always start a quarrel, making the home to be in chaos!!! Yet, irony, he's the one who bring us to this world, directly and indirectly..... Funny ar??? I swore that I will not shed a single tear when he's gone.... I cant help but at times I do hope that he'll die sooner.... Am I heartless??? Yes, to others, but when I think of what he had done.... Did he treat us as his children and grandchildren or are we simply money trees, atm???

Got my grades for EM3A, WISP and OCC.... Was rather suprise with the grades.... I finally pass my EM3A test... *Sigh... Was completely lost after common test... Now, I can only get a C or D in this module... Till now both my grades for WISP and OCC are A, as for the overall grade, it all depends on the last assignment. Wasnt expecting any A this semester. Foresee better grades in my IS modules than in core modules...