Grenade

Easy come, easy go, that's just how you live, ohhhh ~
Take, take, take it all, but you never give.

This song just made me think of baby because he always sing this to me, no matter what.

Hate it when people promised but didn't fulfil, in fact, she put aeroplane on everybody. What a girl. She made me change my impression on her from now on. I have so many clothes wanna buy but I just don't have kaching kaching at all!

Yay, Kenze has tickets to the ndp rehearsal so yes, I'm going for the second time with them! :] I don't know why I am so excited 'bout this yr parade but yes, I'm singaporean! And baby bet on the soccer of singapore and malaysia. I don't understand why the odds for singapore is so freaking high. But well, I still support singapore.

Alright, working full shift tmr, gonna catch some drama and sleep! :]
GOODNIGHT EVERYBODY!

The final lap

I'm done drawing my interior design of my resorts for my sip project! Hope this gonna score us well, :]

Finally the last lap to our presentation and we will be officially done with our attachment! I'm so excited with the opening ceremony, teabreak, speech, presentation and last but not least, the appreciation ceremony. Better give us something meaningful, like cash incentives or free stay also good.

Desmond Lim and Trevor will be there for our presentation, sounds grand eh?

Little brown bear

We have walked through seven months of this journey together. It's only till recently that we have been really sweet terms and didn't quarrel much and this is a good sign! :]

Here goes the monday blue again, though I don't have attachment now but I hate waking up early. Met lrm peeps in school to finalise our powerpoint slides and went to meet baby for dinner at bedok! :] We had chicken pot for our dinner, and it tastes really so-so. Bought my fav pink nail polish and I just finished applying. Sui lah!

And my leg kena sand bugs, bloody shit. :(

Happiness lies in your hand

I always believe that happiness is always lies in your hand. You are the only one who can make thing better, with your own ability. I always told I weren't the most happy girl but if you try to see things in other way, you will know that you can actually be happy. K, full of nonsense. [: Just trying to step one chim and logical speaker.



Helped dad plucked his white hair, felt so accomplish. At least he can stop disturbing me for two weeks. ;] Went over his baby's gym to wait for him and we bought our food home. Both of us are kind of declaring bankrupt. Now, waiting for my attachment pay. Kns, they kept postponing their date, making me so cashless/netless now.



Watched teevee over at his house and dinner before we decided to go chinatown to walk around! :] Thanks baby for accompanying me there, after much persuasion by me. Chinatown makes me open my eye wide, with all the cheena stuffs over there. Felt disgusted by the duck food, with its whatever duck body parts, like tongue, neck, liver or whatever. But the strawberry&peace juice was great!



Shopped around the food market and night market before head home. Love him so much! :]
Happy seven months, baby! We have long way to go. Can't wait to go sentosa with you after we earned enough money, hehehehe!

Feast!

Finally a proper date with baby after so long! ;)

Supposed to go singing but there wasn't any available room left so impromptu decision to catch wu xia with him. Had dinner buffet with baby, Kenze and Eugenia at nihon and some thing happened that totally spoilt our mood. :(

Don;t even know if it's a right decision to go there for dinner.

Life's better now

Dragged myself off the bed to prepare for work, don't wanna lose $6 just because I can't wake up. It was pouring heavily till I was hestitating whether to wear slipper out. Worked w Royston and Andy. Was kind of pissed off w A just now. Yes, I know he's a captain now and he has the rights to exert his power but not all the time. I used my phone but when it wasn't busy at all. Whatever lah, and I talked to him, he ignored and walked off. How rude can it be? Fuck, make me look so dumb talking to you.

From then on, I told myself not to work so hard at nihon to crawl as high as possible to get the captain post because it's just nothing there, with all the ginna. I shall aim somewhere higher out there, and this just gonna be a part time job of mine to earn more money! Yes, that's the way!



Baby's so cute in this! ;)

Hope F1 will hire me since they are hiring baby. *prayhard, bobi bobi*

Dim sum at Geylang with baby's family, ;)

All by myself

Suddenly damn curious about Charice, yes the one who sang Pyramid and Louder. She's freaking cool and powerful. Read through her biography and realised that she went through many sad memories and had domestic problem. And, she's only 19y/o!

K, couldn't wake up so went to work at 1pm. Working at nihon is really much better and happier than working at canele or anywhere! But hate it when A trying to exert his power on me, yes I know he's pt cap now, but can talk to me nicely. I know I just came back to work and really unfamiliar with everything, so please talk to me in a nicer tone. Goodness!

Hope tmr gonna turns out well, pls.

Everything and more

Was extremely tired today despite me sleeping for eleven hours. Really cannot take it at all.
Had presentation to the resort managers and always late. Baby was so funny and generous for forgiving me, despite waiting for real long! Love him much.

If only life is always so great like now.

On the edge with you

Been into Edge of Glory lately, the only song I like from Lady Gaga.

Again, felt so exhausted today. Worked 11am and did the opening. I can't click well with the new staffs at all, or maybe Nihon will just be a place for me to work and work only. I can't be possibly clicking very well with those 15, 16y/o xmm.

Second last presentation tmr and gonna meet baby for dinner. Working 12pm on thurs, god! :(

Leg's so pain

First day back to nihon and worked full shift. Was exhausted like mad, especially closing. Was totally shag and I took so much effort to mop the floor. Felt so comfortable working there 'cause like everything flashed back, but definitely not about my past relationship. Aunty asked me if how's me and Zuanzhe, gosh, that was like years ago issue. Now, I have Jiale, and I believe he's better than him.

I had made a fool of myself during work, everyone laughed like mad.
Alright, shall think that I am cute instead. Hehehehe!

Amazing moment with you

Impromptu lunch with Shirlene and Kenze after classroom session. Supposed to have dinner w more people but glad that the someone didn't come. If not, I guess it's gotta be a miserable lunch for me. Not trying to be cruel or what, but you started all these nonsense first.

Lunch at Din Tai Feng then went shopping with 'em at Orchard. Vans has hello kitty version now! Totally love it lots, but I don't wear such shoes that often, so kind of wasted. Shawn then joined us. Went off to meet bb at station and headed to his house to rest and put his stuffs.



Rest till six plus and I supposed to meet the girls for dinner but was cancelled last minute. So, joined bb, Daryl and Songjie to celebrate Songjie's birthday. Dinner at mahanttan fish market, was my first time dining there. K, don't taste good at all. Agree with bb, long john silver is even better. Dessert at Cold Stone Creamery then bb suddenly suggested to go play gmax.



And they really went. I salute them, guys.

Went home and baby slacked at my house till 3am then cab back. Feeling much guilty.

Met baby this afternoon and he said he wanna cook lunch for me so we went to buy those ingredient before going his house.



He cooked spanish food for me! Hehehehe. & Daryl commented the photos that he could not believe his eyes.

Though the bow tie pasta was tasteless but I felt really touched that he suddenly wanna cook for me. But the bacon wrap prawns was yummy!

Slacked at his house and I fell asleep right after dinner, was really tired these few days.

Baby sent me back home from amk, really very touched. Cause I said I had headache, god. I feel even more guilty now. Thanks baby! Though we always quarreled and said things that hurt each other, but you know and I know that we don't mean it at all and we still love each other alot. Gotta not meeting you that often since you have your competition coming, will definitely go support you during your fight. Love you baby.

You're not sorry.

All this time I was wasting hoping you would come around,
I've been giving out chances every time and all you do is to let me down.
And it's taking me this long baby but I figured you out,
and you're thinking we'll be fine again but not this time round.

Could've loved you with all my love, if you hadn't left me waiting in the cold.

.

Presentation to the company big shot isn't an easy task.
My heart gonna drop out anytime soon.
Guess what? I'm back to action in Nihon.

Sometimes, I keep thinking what I want in life. If I can, I wish to turn back the time when I was a baby. I can cry everyday, but I don't feel ache in my heart. I can laugh everyday, don't have to worry about other thing after I finish laughing. I can crawl to anywhere I want. I can do anything I want, and not feeling stressed. I don't have to think about studies, work, relationship, friendship and family. Because everyone will protects me.

I wanna be a baby.

Awkward night

Woke up to make sandwich for bb and he stupidly doesn't seem to be appreciate. Sigh! Met up with Shirlene in the afternoon and pass baby the sandwiches and fruits. Walked to Clarke Quay under the hot sun, like wanna burn my skin.

Shoppped aimlessly, caught my eyes for a flora dress but don't know whether I should buy it, then without realising, I had slowly walked to Ion.



Walked around forever 21, want something but no ability to get it. Met Lihui at Dhoby and waited for baby to come. Then, the awkward dinner started. Everyone brought their partners there and I only clicked with Eugenia. ;) Rochor beancurb after that and cab home w/ them! ;)
I don't understand why whenever waiting for bus with baby, it always come so fast. But when I wait alone, the bus comes freaking slow.

Project meeting w/ Khuzaimah and Ben tmr, then the review presentation on Fri. :(

Life's like that.

What's about life?

I feel like I'm a bastard, because I disappoint the staff at cosway. I wasn't happy at all. I just wanted to try some different job and see what I really want and like in life.

Finished job and I went home to take a rest while made a sandwich for baby.

He was having his training for his upcoming competition. I sat all alone along the Singapore river, reflecting on myself and thinking what I actually want in life. I really have no idea what I want in life and all I know is to live my life a day pass a day. I feel the changes in everything in life, relationship, family, and everything. Everything isn't going on smoothly at all.

Bb injured his leg and he lazy to send me back home and go home so he stayed over at my house.

I think one day I need to go temple and think what I really want in life.

Disappointment

Actually I like this photo alot because the angle just nice. Thanks Thaijin! ;)



And this photo was beautifully taken! Look like chun gu, bodoh.



Thanks Thaijin accompanied me to the ndp preview! ;) Love you load, baby!

Tonight was the real bad night I ever had, really the worst. Heart ache like fucking mad.

Baby, you're the firework

I found a part time and it all happened too fast. I was on my way to the restroom and passed by a healthcare shop and they are looking for retail assistant. So, I stopped and walked in to ask and they were so flexible with my schedule and yah, I've found a job. Mom said it's not really a good shop but hope I won't get cheated.

Lunch with mom and she headed back home while I went to meet bb for awhile since I have nowhere to go. Walked around Raffles aimlessly, till Thaijin came and bb went off. I thought this year ndp was same as last year, held at Padang, that's why I asked Thaijin to meet at Raffles. Both of us stupidly walked to float from Raffles, following all the primary five kids.



The introduction was quite good, much better than last year! ;) Musical.



The songs, without the kopi-o-o-o, was better now. I didn't fall asleep at all and everything was perfect. The firework lit up the night sky and the buildings were all lighted up. Everything was really really damn beautiful.



Thaijin and I sang along the national anthem and said the pledge. I really love the firework and tonight! Perfect!

Hope everyday there's firework lit up the sky and to make my mood happier.

A serious fight for the past few days. It tore me down and drinking was the only option for me then. Decided to meet up for lunch and talk yesterday to settle things and yeap, glad we talked it through. Last night was really happy, like a great date back again. Knowing that it's impossible to meet up that often alr so I must control of my ownself and not being like a superglue and stick to him always.

Yah, not gna do that.
15 jul will be our sip review presentation, currently finding pt job to spend my off-days fruitfully. Finally quit Canele 'cause I have a screwed and fucked up manager that replied, "good" when I said I'm gna quit. Glad that I don't have to work w him anymore, bless!

Thanks Hongjun for this sat ndp preview! ;)
Gna watch it w Thaijin and she said she's gna bring binocular there. And I told bb, "Bb, Thaijin said she's gna bring b-no-cu-le leh". Shit, screwed. Getting more and more worried for my presentation on 27 jul. Hope this yr goodie bag will be nice!

Sober like I'll never do

This is gonna be the worst screwed day I ever had in life, trust me.

It's a matter of letting go or forgiveness. But, I've already predict the outcome. Well, I know it will back to normal soon. Yongji chatted with me right now at 4.03am and he asked me how's life. I replied, " life sucks, like mf." That's how I answered him.

Devastated? Yes, of course!

Being so restless after the shittest job at Canele and searching for a new part time job for the whole afternoon. During all the different interview, all I thought was him, his schedule, accommodating him so I can meet him. Nah, all rejected me. Many things happened coincidentally. Helpless is all I felt right now.

Tell me that everything's gna be okay.

Burnin' like fire

Have a better cool mind now. Wasn't in the good temper and mood for the past few days and I guess everything is settled and I'm back to normal. Sorry friends if you guys were like shocked that I've been like real emotion lately. It's just that it was my lowest point in my life and now, it's back to up again! ;)

Slept till 2 plus in the afternoon and wanted to find jobs at recruit express but gave it a miss. Met Rachel for dinner at Old malaya cafe and bumped into Chengwei. He got real shocked and bet he's feeling guilty like mad now. Then, off to meet bb at Bedok for his dinner. I still couldn't forget last night incident. And I'm so gonna make a cupcake like this for him one day.

Canele tmr! ;) Shall ask if they need people on Friday!

AND ANYONE CAN TELL ME WHEN'S THE NEXT COTTON ON MASS RECRUITMENT? ;)

Sing along to my stereo

# Stereo hearts - Gym Class Heroes

Hiding in my room, wiping my tears nonstop, realised that it isn't the first night that I've been doing this. I cried so much that I don't even realised how many nights I've been doing that. I am tired of doing that already. But I believe I will be back to normal soon. Wait for me.

I'm a cry baby

One week. I hope I don't say it because I feel hurt but is really want to think it properly. I can't think what to do for this one week. All I can do is to cry, to drink and to think. Feeling so heavy-hearted and sad when I know that someone dislike me so much out of nowhere. Feel like I'm a lousy person.

So many times I wanna disappear suddenly, so many times I wanna hurt myself to forget the pain I had. So many times, I've been crying under my blanket, telling myself to be strong. So many times, I wanted to give up but I held back. So many times, I lost control and vent my anger on him. So many times, I don't know what I am doing but feeling really screwed. Is there anything that can numb your pain for very very very long? Tell me what to do, :(

Who can I turn to?

休息是为了走更长的路，你就是我的旅途。
好的事情最后虽然结束，感动十分就有十分满足。

Been ups and downs recently, been hiding under the blanket and wiping my tears when I sleep. Don't ask me what's goes wrong because I don't even know what exactly went wrong. I wanna be your priority, not back-up. I know it's impossible, I know it all. All the small things show us that we aren't suitable but we are trying to make it through.

Will we succeed?

心痛比快乐更真实

A good good night and a sucky time.



Love this polaroid damn much.



Jiale came over to my house to stay last night



Thanks Shirlene for accompanying me to go all the way to Marina Square to see Romeo Tan and was damn glad that at least we took photo. I swear my heart beat like crazie. I still couldn't believe this!

Had a great time laughing with Shirlene and she actually took me to take wrong train. Lol.