It's only 11.37pm now and I'm bored like hell. Time chatted with him just passed so fast that we seemed like only talked for 1min.

Finally going dating with my darlings on Tuesday! <3 Hopefully will caught something on that day at far east. 've been real long since we had update each other regarding our lives 'bout relationship, studies and friends.

Hey, I miss you.

I have finally submitted the enrolment form to tp just now. I was so afraid when I called tp and they said it's closed. Thanks him for accompanying me to tp. Day with him seems so short and fast. Wasted 2 hours, could have meet him longer.

You-tubed now.

Life is so bored, when you got nothing to do. D!

Collected the medical report alone today. I didn't know that tech was so advanced that it's firmless now. No longer those big big x-ray report. It's just a piece of paper stating the heart is normal in size, no active lungs lesions are seen. (: I'm perfectly healthy!

Then took 17 to nihion for meeting. Totally feeling weird 'cause only I turned up for the meeting. Then back home. Finally can meet tzz tomorrow but it's only few hours and he has to visit his granddad at evening. Well, it's better than not meeting. Ohmyhellgod, needa memorize all those pricing for buffet already if not kena scolding on sun.

Will post up pics soon(:

Woke up by some nightmare. I've been clinging on all these nightmare for at least 1 month. Sometimes it happened, sometimes not. I'm seriously get real tired of it already. It seems like I can't get rid of all these. And it's all because of one girl who I will never ever forgive because of her characters. Hey, can you tell me how to stop dreaming of all these. It makes me real insecure, I can't even have a good sleep. Damn her.

Going to collect my medical report tomorrow. I believe this is the time for me to be independent. I love all these. Then, having some meeting at nihon at 5. Hopefully, Y and D will accompany me for dinner tomorrow.

My feeling is fcuking sucks now because of one bitchy girl. I know my always listener knows.

From tomorrow, counting for two days, I will not be meeting him at all because he's occupied with stuffs. Going to SATA to collect my report alone. :( hah.

Okay, boring blogger -.-

I am an officially temasek polytechnic student now! :)

Online enrolled for the registration and went for medical check up already. Couldn't print out those enrolment form in zsq's house, so went to nearby photo shop to print through thumbdrive. There was total of 7 pages and I was freakin' shocked when that aunty told me that one page costs 70cents. What the hell?! She even said that it's actually $1 per sheet but 'cause I'm student, thats why discount till 70cents. Can you actually believe me or not?

It was cool when taking the urine test. I went taller by 1cm but got fatter by 2kg. Eye test was perfect. X ray was scary. Girls gotta take out everything before taking x ray, feeling weird.

Will not be able to meet him more next week. :(
Who wanna go out can ask me yea! (:

Watched Yoga's concert on Fri, it was still all right. I'm sorry to say that the opening was not up to my expectation. Overall, still quite worth it by paying at 43bucks.

Next day, attended cousin's wedding at church. It was cool, just like those appeared in the drama. Went back home and took a nap. Class bbq was fun 'cause I ate alot of foods! :) Foods make me happy.

All right, calling zsq now. Bye everyone!

Oh my god! Bought the latest teenage mag and read it while waiting for zz taking his final theory test. I saw something, I feel like having it! Ipanema Gisele Bundchen Seeds sandals. It's real cool, serious! But it's only available at selected royal sporting house, if not, tangs vivocity. God! Will be going to tm rsh to take a look, and it's quite cheap.

Day with him was not bad, quite all right. We managed to talk about that argument peacefully. :) I hope we will always remain like this. Chatted with Huimin online last night, it makes me feel like going to school asap! Year two will be a problematic/excited days for me! Sentosa, here I come, in one year time.

Will not be meeting zsq tomorrow, going to shop at grocery with mom. But will be meeting him on fri for yoga's concert! Till now, it will still makes me remember that stephanie went to shake yoga's hand twice! Well, suddenly my mind flashed back what happened few days back again. The feeling is real sucks. But I know I still gotta believe it. :(

Fact hurts to the core.

At times, I don't know the feeling that I was going through is it lonliness, or is it depress? Perhaps, it's both. Right now, I don't know how our relationship is going on. It's neither here nor there.

I think I should be a real understanding girlf/friend/stranger now, let him focus on his upcoming exam. I believe he must be real stress with it now. I do not know how stress it is 'cause I ain't experiencing it but darling rachel told me that it's really stressful. Yea, be understanding okay meiyan! :(

I just wish to vent out all my problems into my blog. I hope you all will not ask me what happened in the post because after this post is being post out, I don't feel like talking about it already. Now, there's so many things running through my mind. I couldn't work properly. All I can do is to make myself tired by working more and more. I can't take it soon. The tireness is really hard to describe. I don't know what tireness is it.

Flashing back all the memories we had, my tears just rolled down. Mutual trust is what we really lacking of. What I know is trust is really need time to build up. I guessed I know the ending of our story. I really don't know how to say my feeling now. It's like suck+confused+painful+hurt+sad+torture, it's all mixed up. I want to change. Maybe like what you said, must we really face the result of seperating then we'll know that we should be together. I know we both aren't treating this relationship as a game, I hope I am right. Every song I heard now is love parting song. The current one that I'm listening to is the song that I first heard from you. You gave me alot of memories but now, you are adding lemon to it. I truly don't understand.

I always hoping that you will change because of our relationship. I am just a normal girl who wishes to be loved wholeheartedly. I didn't say you don't. I just don't wish that this relationship will be like the same as the previous one because I will be more hurt than the past. Why things can so easily said out from your mouth? I really don't understand. Believe that I really tried my best to keep a distance from you already.

There were a song lyric which said that,
The most happiness thing is to keep your heart for the one you love.

True, I understand.

14 feb, st valentine day. It just turned out freaking bad for me.

Couple must have mutual trust towards each other. Yes, both might have trust for each other but it doesn't mean that both will last long. It still can be betrayed. On valentine, I'm different from others. I realised something. Love isn't great but love is actually nothing. Love is hurt.

This 14 months of relationship, it's really very hard to describe. There were really happy moments but there were really upset times. In this 14 months, I understand my own stand of love. I'm not saying till I'm noble or what. True, everyone has different way to expressing their love, different view of a love and different perspective. I can't expect everyone to have the same thinking as me. But things just turned out so sudden. My heart is broken, worst than the past. It's different pain that I am experiencing now. Working very hard to let this relationship goes smoothly and knowing some other things, it made me hurt.

Should I say I should blame myself for being so itchy hand and went to look and saw those thing? or I should have know the fact better. Ignorance is really bliss but I guessed it's better to know the truth. Trust can't be build up within few hours or few days. Trust can't be build up alone. But when I had decided to build up trust, you made me fell again. Love? Whats that?

I'm tired. :'(

Love hurts.

Currently, I'm talking on the phone with boy, planning about tomorrow.

Had a small argument tonight but glad it's solved now. :)

Happy birthday Kenneth Tan Li Wen! && Happy Valentine Day tomorrow!

It doesn't start off well in the morning. Till afternoon, it was about the same. Then night, still all right.

Tears in the morning, totally felt helpless and hurt. It was like few weeks ago, the old same feeling. Shocked and helpless. All I know was to cry.

Was being awake by nihon's calls. Rushed down for work at 3 and end work at 1030. Dead beat, feeling so dead now. Its like always repeat the same old thing. Clean the tables, clear the plates, key the orders and fold the scott towels. I'm gonna get sick of it soon! ! !

Tomorrow going back to sec school with the boys and girls. Doubt I will be going 'cause I confirm can't wake up on time.

Rachel, now I realised that I understand your feeling. It's really better to be ignorant at times than knowing the facts. Because facts hurt!

Ok, needa complete v day thing. Goodnight! :)

Feeling's down today.

Forget to mention that Benjamin Poh had successfully appeal to hospitality and tourism! If I know, I would have join him too. Because I still thought that he will fail.

This pangseh kia is no longer gonna be in same course as me already. I am leisure and resort management and he's hospitality and tourism management. Win liao lo Benj Poh SH!

Humph!

Kay, I've made up my mind! Some new rule that gonna apply to my life.

1. One day per month can only buy potatoes chips.
2. No more bubble tea everyday. Drink plain waters everyday!
3. Must have a constant meals, cannot skip meals.
4. Must at least go for exercise twice a week.
5. Do sit up every night before sleep.

Haha, I must maintain all these rules, if not someone gonna keep on complaining about my figure la. I just gain 1 kg after lost 2 kg. It's okay, I still have 1kg to gain before it contra. :)

HAPPY ADVANCE BIRTHDAY TO KENNETH TAN LI WEN.
He's turning 19 this year, I guessed and his birthday is on st valentine day! He just wants me to praise him but seriously sorry, there's nothing for me to praise about. :)

Movie tomorrow! :)

There's only one word I can describe my current feeling, tired. Was called down for work for tomorrow morning last minute. I'm so afraid that I might not be able to wake up on time.

Valentine Day is just in few days, don't know how it will spend this year. 6 more days! :) Out of sudden, I don't feel like working anymore. 'Cause I can no longer tahan the tireness already! Next week gonna put less less schedule. Okay, I'm tired.

Goodnight!

Is poly really gonna start in 2.5 months? And this gonna mean that I have to rot for another 2.5 months?

Working was really just a time for me to pass my time. OhYa! I AM GOING TO YOGA LIN'S CONCERT ON 20FEB, I'm getting real excited for that! :D But still gonna thanks stephanie for helping me to buy the ticket at 50% off.

thanks stephanie lim huiting!

Well, might not be able to post pictures already :( So, if you miss seeing me, meet me up! Gotcha?

Oh my god! It was totally hell man. My desktop just totally spoilt not long ago. And now, I'm using my bro's laptop. Who can give me a comment, whether to buy a laptop or send my desktop for repair? I still need something for my poly this year! Feeling real sian when I realised my desktop just went blanked like that.

Couldn't wake up this afternoon at all, was real tired. Forced myself to open my eye and went to bath. Went over to huishan's house to help out with jueying creating her blog. Then, meet zuanzhe after that for dinner. (:

It's a good day in day, bad day in night.

Happy 18th Birthday, Jasmine and Anna! (:

I was dead beat today. Even Jasmine had realised how tired I was when I was sitting on her sofa. My eye nearly closed. Work today was still all right 'cause managed to chit chat with them to spend the time away. Then, went to prima deli to choose the cake for Jas. It's forest fantasy, taste rather too sweet. Somehow like brownies.

Planned a surprise for Jasmine but failed. How I wish it could restart again. I planned to shock her la, wasted! Steamboat-ed at her house. Hahah, I treat it like my home. So carefree about my move about anywhere. Then kylie and jueying accompanied me home till the bus-stop. Thanks la, it's like my birthday everyday right. I know you guys gonna say that.



Happy Birthday, greentea!

And, I'm still gonna face you for other 3 years. I believe you feel honoured.
:D

Okay, gonna continue my thingy!(:
Goodbye!

Things seemed better today :D but sucks at the other matter. Working was real boring. Buffets only had 4 tables, ala carte only have about 16 people. I was only busy at wiping the bowls and spoons and taking order. Tomorrow confirm will be a slacking day ahead too!
Will be celebrating Jasmine's birthday at her house. Hah. Eating steamboat as her celebration.

Well, what I can said was only, let nature takes it course.

Yah! I remembered something. This morning, the first message that woke me up was my ''moodswing'' friend. I was being scolded 'cause of my previous post. Hah, but it was fun! :D

Things go till this extent. I do not know what's going on, I do not know what to do. I have an easily moodswing friend who said that I've changed compared to past two weeks. I can't say that it's a good sign. I know my moodswing friend will come read my blog but please do not get pissed off again. :D

Bought macadamia nut chocolate to surprise him after I left home.

Nearly forget that I'm working tomorrow at 1. Guess it will be quite a bored day ahead 'cause confirm not much customers. Haha, meeting my two babes after that for tea break talk. Loves!

Got to go, bye!

Down to bugis with darling rachel to search for something(: One bag caught my eyes and rachel said it was not bad and she rated it for 82%. But my mommy said it doesnt look nice la. It makes me real confused now. :{

Slept at 6am last morning/night. Woke up at 11am. Slept for only 5hours but it's all worth it. Wanted to meet him today in between his break, end up I left after half hour. Received calls from ehub nihon to down for work. So, rushed back home to change and down for work. It's so different from tamp nihon la. In tamp, when eating sushi, everyone was like busy chatting and eating but in ehub, only 6 of us sat down quietly and eat the sushi. The customers that came was less than 70 I guessed.

Sigh. In between when doing runner, all my mind was about the past in nihon. I guessed that's the time whereby I was quite happy 'cause everything was just started. Now, one's at tamp nihon, one's at ehub nihon. Just two different places, the feeling was just sucks la. :(