2 more weeks and I will be free from the tense atmosphere. However, it only when I am about to finish my papers, I feel more tense. Weird but, quite a good thing in otherwise.

POA paper 2 was still all right, just that made a few stupid careless mistakes which might make me lose my A1 for it. Next paper will be Social Studies and I am still clueless about the content. I went to Miss Tay's birthday chalet at Aloha Loyang, which was situated quite a distant from the downtown east. Walked along the narrow road and perspire all the way till we reached the destination. It was my first time going to the Aloha Loyang chalet. Not a bad place, it's much more cleaner then normal chalet. But I guessed the pricing of booking might be not 'bad' too.

Took lot of pictures in the room, with Minnie Mouse and even witch. This is to go with the theme of Halloween. As for the pictures taken, I will only post it up after my O's finish.

Anyway, talk about my personal life. It was quite boring. It seems like so many things have been changing, I'm no longer be able to go with my feeling for everything. I am tired for making decision, picking up a quarrel and bothering of it. I do not know what does the feeling mean. Does it mean that I am simply tired or I am no longer bothering it? Can someone gives me an answer to it?

I bet everyone can see that I am changing, even you. Things will change, so as me.

Let me have a good rest before walking towards the other hurdle. I need it. Bye.

Two papers just ended and I am already in the holiday mood. Or I should said that I ain't in the mood to focus on my remaining papers. Geography will kick off tomorrow and frankly speaking, I hasn't even read my notes at all. Till now, I still do not know which topic should I choose.

From so many things happening recently, I realised that I'm not a person who can multi task. You want me to focus on my studies when so many things are happening? I can't. I do not know whether am I settle a problem but I hope the other one will not come. Right now, I wish to focus on my O's and have a part time job after that. To earn sufficient money to prepare to buy a laptop in case I need it in Poly.

I do not want to mention about the problem because I noticed that no matter how much I said, the problem will be forever lies with me. I have no rights to speak up for what I want. No one understands what I'm lacking of. No one ever knows. Listen to this song really give me a peaceful mind to think. I do not wish to compare and regret what I have decide.

I need a rest. I'm speechless. I'm breatheless.

I made a good progress today.

This coming Thursday.

Right now, I'm sitting on the floor in my room, using my Brother's laptop and chatting with online friends. Although O level is just next Thursday but I still could not sense any motivation at all. I'm drained out. Countless of mournful events happened this few days. It happened till I totally feel like giving up, obviously not my O level.

Most of my friends went back for night study in school this whole week but I never intend to go back even once. Because, my mentality told me that I can study on my own and don't need to go to school. But the fact is, I know nothing. I simply know nothing but there's nothing I can do because I'm stubborn.

After reading Anna's blog, I quite agreed. Maybe this is the real time to see a person's true colour. Who knows that I've been hurt deeply this few days because of some problem. I know I can't be a perfect friend, who is there for you when you're down, share your joys or tears. I admit that I can't be because our thinking aren't alike. I'm truly sorry that if you think you're hurt because that I ain't a good friend because I feel that way too. Whenever I tears because of some other problem, you will definitely be the one who is there for me.

Now, everyone who walked passed me will definitely asked the same question, "How come you never study with XXX already". My heart sinked, tears rolled down from my eye. No one understands how I feel and how much I'm hurt. Sometimes, I'm really tired of it. No one seems to care about my feeling and pointing their fingers on me. It doesn't feel good. Well, no matter how much I waste my breathe on explaining my feeling, no one will knows.

It's hard to stick the broken pieces of item a beautiful and flawless object.

3 October 2008, a hot Friday, marked as the day when I had officially graduated from my secondary school life. Sweet memories flashed through my mind when I saw the video made by the teachers in the canteen. Despite numerous scolding from teachers, they still love us. I believe they do.

Post prelim programme finally ended on Friday too and now is the last lap where I will decide my own future. However, by seeing my prelim result, it doesn't seem to be satisfactory. With my prelim result, I can't go to any business courses in polytechnics. Nowadays, there is so many happening around but I do not wish to mention it. As for now, I will go continue my studies group with my fellow sweet friends.

O level is less than 2 weeks time. I'm somehow struggling already.