Maaf, saya sakit.

Hi my loveliesss. Rindu sama kamu semua!

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Rasanye dah berminggu tak update blog, berhabuk dah diari saya nih. Diari eyh? boley laa.. >__<

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Ye, saya sakit for few days. Sebenarnya dah berhari-hari tapi last wednesday memang dah teruk. Since last week, I had this minor shivering & fidgeting syndrome. The best part, these two syndromes struck me between 10am to 12pm only, not later nor earlier than that.

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Mula-mula I thought it was gastric ke ape since pernah ada history but pelik lah jugak because I'm a morning person, breakfast mesti makan walau apa pun. Pastu mula-mula ingatkan air cond dlm court sejuk melampau ke ape tapi tak jugak, dah suruh polis lowerkan temp, still mcm tuuuu jugak.

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sigh.

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So, last wednesday, masa tgh jalankan this one trial, all of sudden, saya sakit dada. Sesak nafas lah jugak, rasa tersekat-sekat, mcm asthma attack tapi dlm keadaan yang menggigil. Luckily time tuh dah nak rest my case, tahan la jap. Habis je case, terus terduduk termengah-mengah, sakit dada Tuhan je yg tau. Polis mahkamah dah panik, terus berdesuupppp hantar pi klinik yg seminit je dari court klang tuh.

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Sampai-sampai je terus pakai mask for oxygen, fuh, drama kan tetibe aku nih. Bila dah lega, doc pun tanya mcm2, check situ sini, amik darah, check BP and for the first time BP naik, check lah segala macam. Cut the story short, saya nih ade masalah orang-yang-tak-sedar-yang-diri-dia-sebenarnye-tension. Paham?

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Saya pun tak paham. Doc says, I have this kind of nerve problem which denies the fact that I am in the state of stress and it happens only when I'm over stressing or hyper-tension. Kih kih kih. Sungguh tak ku sangka! Pandai cover youuu... >_____<

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Okay, serious jap.

Ye, doc cakap ada org mcm saya nih. Sebenarnya tension tapi motivate diri sendiri over over konon-konon mampu la or takpe boleh handle lg when sebenarnye body & mind dah tak boleh terima TAPI my brain doesn't realize that. Tapi alhamdulillah lepas makan ubat yang pelbagai itu, dah kurang dah rase gigilnye, and jantung pun dah tak melompat-lompat mcm biasa, sekarang hanya catwalk gitu jantung I.

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Memang kene bebel sakan lah kan dgn DPP lain & encik-encik polis semua kat court tuh, tu pun nasib baik tuan majistret tak tau lagi tuh, kalau tak mau dia tambah sekati dua bebelan berapi. Hadoi. Nak buek mcm mano, den pon tak sodar den poning. Hampun. Bee, I'm sorry syg.

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So, insyallah, andai diizinkan waktu dan kudrat (chewah!) blog ni saya update ye? Blog hopping pun dah lama tak buat nih, rindu lah kat korang! And to Kak Dina, thanks for the invitation untuk shopping pagi tadi, and thousand apologies sbb tak reply msg, pssstt...line kene bar tlupa nak bayor...hik.

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Peeps, pray for me eyh? Rindu nak cot cet dgn kamu kamu dan kamu!!!

Sebulan Berlalu.

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My sweet readers; kalau ada jiwang-phobia, this entry is not for you.

Readers discretion is advised. Hihihi.

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Sayang,

You may not approve me writing this jiwang note for you here but knowing you, I can picture you sengeh eventually. Hik.

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Sayang,

It's been a month since I last saw you.
For our standard, one month is not that long, kan B?
When you were in Batu Rakit and I was at UIA, sometimes due to the exams, different holiday breaks etc, we didn't see each other quite often and one month was considered okay, kan? =)

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Sayang,

No doubt that I was a lost kitten for the first week after you left.

Crying in the middle of nights, crying whilst driving, crying everytime at the thought of you calling me at your usual hours, pendek kata, crying when I want to.

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The most painful time was in the evening; around 6 to 8pm.

When you were around, you always tell me that everyday, you will wait for those hours because you'll get to talk to me without me rushing to do work stuff.

I didn't pay much attention to those words but I've realized it now.

And I'm so, so sorry sayang. It must been hard on you. Inconsiderate me. =(

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Sayang,

I'm not writing stuff that worries you. I'm not writing to tell the world how inconsiderate I was/am (hihi,tau pun malu...) but I'm writing to tell you that for the past one month, I was alright & happy.

But don't get me wrong, I would be jumping all around if you are here.

What I want to tell you is that I'm doing fine here, really.

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As long as I know that you are fine onboard, I'll be fine baby.

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I can't thank you enough for doing everything possible to let me know that you are fine and you miss me and you love me.

One email per day, satellite phone calls every 2 or 3 days and hundreds of ringgit for SMSes & calls when the coverage is within reach. THANK YOU.

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Thank you sayang,

It feels right to have you in my life.

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Everytime my heart calls for you & yearns for your comforting voice,,,, there you go; +121978010 will be singing at my handphone screen.

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And everytime it happened, you'll hear my usual shrieking of "Bee!!!!!! Baru doa mintak2 Bee call!!!!" and pufffffff, just like that, no more tears & problems.

As if you know that I am in pain.

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Take today, when I was driving with my head waiting to explode and with tears to the office on Saturday morning just to clear off piles of mess, +121978010 >> you called, and the first thing you said to me was, "Assalamualaikum...baby...sayang okay tak...?

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As if you know that I am in pain.

Sweetness.
And after 30 minutes listening to your voice, I was humming all the way and these piles are almost gone. Yeayy to me!

And yes, it feels damn right to have you in my life. Owh, I did tell you that already, did I? ^____^
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So sayang, at least another 5/6 months to go. No sweat right? Teeeheeee...well, I'll TRY. Owhh c'mon, you know I can pull this off. Saya okay lah B, kan? Kita okay. Dulu boleh jee, sekarang mesti lagi boleh, kan sayang? >____<

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Pssttt...I know I say this often, but I do love you. I do love you for who you are, even when you put on 5kgs during your first month sailing. *Laaarrrrriiiiiii....hihihihi......*
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Take care sayang, when you are thinking of me and missing me (you better do! hehehe), just imagine that I am one of the engineers onboard, married to you. I'm sure you'll be smiling & grinning. Uish, jgn sengeh lama sangat bang..hik.

Kalau saya stop jadi DPP pastuh masuk ALAM pastuh join Bee onboard, Bee bagi tak?

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Ye saya tau, Bee tak bagi. Saje jeee tanye... >____<

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Good night sayang, I miss you but i'm smiling. xoxo. Happy first-month-onboard. =)

Qlod is my brainy friend. Bye bye.

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When I first saw her 8 years ago, I said to myself; tingginya dia nih, mesti bleh geng dgn aku.
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The last time I saw her, she is one of my bestfriends. And still tinggi. Memang geng. My definition of geng must include her name. Sangat geng kan? Geng. Sangat.
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Last weekend, the six of us (yang lain-lain tak dapat bersama) spent one night at Grand Seasons Hotel, KL. Slumber party-lah-kononnya. Sebenarnya ala-ala farewell party untuk geng aku tersebut yang akan fly semula ke Adelaide next week.
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Sedih la ko dah nak pergi balik sana wahai geng. Akibat terlalu pandai, ini lah akibatnya. Hihihi. Ada sape-sape nak lawan geng tinggi aku nih? Kecerdikan melampau di dalam electrical engineering memaksa dia sambung PhD TANPA perlu amik Masters. Pandai kan? Ye, geng memang pandai. Jadi pasni kene panggil geng Dr. Aqilah di kala usianya 27tahun kelak. Cesss ko, seronok ah tuh aku tulis pasal ko dlm blog nih. Glamer. Gile glamer. Hikhikhik.
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Baru perasan yang tak banyak sangat amik gambar memandangkan terlalu asyik bercerita mengutuk memuji sesama sendiri bergosip pasal orang yg dikenali mahu pun tidak dikenali dan makan dan menyanyi berkaraoke dan menceritakan hal kahwin masing-masing yang rupanya tarikh kami berderet-deret, insyallah.
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Buat Aqilah atau nama manjanya Kak Yang atau nama kurang manjanya, QLOD; we wish you the best of luck! Jangan lupain kami semua yang sayang banget sama kamu. Dari dulu sampai sekarang, kau tak pernah berubah dari segi kesengalan tapi maintain pandai nak mamp** hingga terbit rasa nak curik otak kau tapi aku tak mampu,hihihi.
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Jangan lupa balik Mesia ye, satgi nangis tunang tersayang ko tuh, kitorang tak nangis, happyyy je ko takde, hehehe...tadela, we gonna miss you so much! Jumpa di KLIA 9 julai yahh! xoxo, hidup TLC!

errr..Paa, bila aku maksudkan tinggi, ko tidak tersenarai. hikhik. Paa, Me, Qlod.

Qlod bangga dengan hadiah die. Ehem, Qlod, aku yg bagi scarf & cap tuuuuu...jgn lupa diri lakk...paham-paham je la ye, nanti ko balik mesia hadiah sape yg paling banyak... =p