i dun usually blog about international events, but this time round, it really warrants a post from an otherwise apathetic individual.
just watched the channel 8 news about the death of the singaporean woman in india. it's not that it's a SINGAPOREAN woman that i'm emphasizing here, it's just that, more than 140 people have died in 36 hours of terrorist attacks, and i really wonder how many more will be added to the death toll.
it's not even a natural disaster that we can't control, it's a HUMAN disaster caused by people who can control themselves.
it must have been a really terrorising experience in the hotels there. i do imagine myself in those scenes, but the imaginations never lasted beyond seconds. it's just too scary.
and all these while thailand is experience such a chaotic situation too. poor people who are trapped in the airports. i suppose my family will not visit bangkok again in the near future.
and and all these PLUS the economic situation and financial breakdown in US and all the other countries in the world.
what is the world coming to man.
sometimes i do count myself lucky to be in s'pore. we're protected from natural disasters, and also less vulnerable to such human disasters. it's times like these when we start to cherish the stability. 麻雀虽小，五脏俱全.
such events really make exams seem like NOTHING compared to the trouble other people are facing. ah well.
that said, i'm still gonna complain about MA paper. i came back from service ops on wed afternoon and did nothing the whole day. so you think i'll panic on thurs? NOOOOO.... i started panicking on thurs LATE afternoon. and i haven't even DONE my MA tutorials can. (i realised i never touched all the tutorials for all my mods this sem.) so no time to do tutorials rite, i went straight to past year papers. CHIONGED thru 6 past year papers all the way to 2am, referring to textbook half the time. and at 2am, i still have not revised my content. but got to sleep mah, so i just decided to heck and went to sleep.
in the end, i woke up at 6am, scanned thru lecture notes, left home and continued with my notes when i reached school at 8am. wow. am i hardworking or not.-_-
but actually, it probably makes no difference since the paper was kinda undo-able in any case. i realised i always meet with all the wonderfully crafted undoable papers. amelia (lee) and ellen were complaining about fna apr 08 paper, and johnson luther daryk they all complained about my stats paper too. haha. maybe that's how i score huh.
mel said she's going for internship this december. sometimes i really envy people like her who has so much motivation to do these things that support her academic grades. i'm just too passive to do anything about all these. or should i say lazy?
one more paper to go. i wonder what kind of 'stunts' i have for macro this time round. i went shopping at bugis with mum today, tmr i'm going polyclinic, and sunday i'm going for tuition. wow i have (not) ended exams!
真希望这对你来说是种解脱，我不能对你说什么，也不能帮你做什么，这关你也许就得自己过。 我相信既然决定是两个人作的，就一定是经过深思熟虑。看开吧！
Friday, November 28, 2008
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
two more to go...
THREE papers down.=) somehow i dun quite possess any more motivation to continue mugging for the next two, but i shall TRY to study hard for both.
finance was fine i guess. missed out some parts of ruth tan's notes so ended up not knowing how to do some mcqs, plus quite uncertain for some answers. but overall it was fine i guess. though i think my poor result at mid-term will prob be a main reason for a lousy grade for finance.
service ops was surprisingly easy. ok not THAT easy, but better than i expected. good thing i attempted the past year papers. even without the answers, at least i have gone through some of his questions before, so i could do it in a shorter time. BUT I WANNA KILL MYSELF FOR BEING SO CARELESS!!! plug answer in also can put in the wrong value..%&^%&^$$%#$^&* and i was still so confident of the answer that i didn't go back to check.-_-. then write formula also write wrongly. VERY GOOD RITE.
ah well. at least the more content-intensive papers are over. now left with MA and macro econs, which i'm not confident of cos both papers are quite simple by nature.=X sigh.
sometimes i feel i'm both a guy and a girl in terms of thinking and actions and mannerisms and language (not referring to anything wrt sexual orientation=X). not like i JUST realised, but it just dawned on me that it IS a cause for concern.
finance was fine i guess. missed out some parts of ruth tan's notes so ended up not knowing how to do some mcqs, plus quite uncertain for some answers. but overall it was fine i guess. though i think my poor result at mid-term will prob be a main reason for a lousy grade for finance.
service ops was surprisingly easy. ok not THAT easy, but better than i expected. good thing i attempted the past year papers. even without the answers, at least i have gone through some of his questions before, so i could do it in a shorter time. BUT I WANNA KILL MYSELF FOR BEING SO CARELESS!!! plug answer in also can put in the wrong value..%&^%&^$$%#$^&* and i was still so confident of the answer that i didn't go back to check.-_-. then write formula also write wrongly. VERY GOOD RITE.
ah well. at least the more content-intensive papers are over. now left with MA and macro econs, which i'm not confident of cos both papers are quite simple by nature.=X sigh.
sometimes i feel i'm both a guy and a girl in terms of thinking and actions and mannerisms and language (not referring to anything wrt sexual orientation=X). not like i JUST realised, but it just dawned on me that it IS a cause for concern.
Monday, November 24, 2008
i'm supposed to be studying
one module down, four more to go. which makes me wonder why i'm here in the first place. was supposed to be mugging for my service ops and finance. ah well.
pls go away headaches. i've had enough of you during mid-terms, and now you are pestering me during my finals too. i can't think properly with you around, so pls do me a favour and go away...
anw yes i've finally changed my template. kinda noob at html, so this is prob the best i can do thus far. and the ironic thing is, the trigger that made me want to change my template is studying the use of html for mis.=X and it led me to be so distracted cos all i can think of is how to change my blog template and what stuff to include in my blog.
it's kinda a tradition to take photos of my rabbits during exam time cos i'll be especially bored. so here are some photos of them!
pls go away headaches. i've had enough of you during mid-terms, and now you are pestering me during my finals too. i can't think properly with you around, so pls do me a favour and go away...
anw yes i've finally changed my template. kinda noob at html, so this is prob the best i can do thus far. and the ironic thing is, the trigger that made me want to change my template is studying the use of html for mis.=X and it led me to be so distracted cos all i can think of is how to change my blog template and what stuff to include in my blog.
it's kinda a tradition to take photos of my rabbits during exam time cos i'll be especially bored. so here are some photos of them!
so cute aren't they?
listened to this rather old song (since 6 years ago?) on the way to school today. heard this song a couple of times, but never knew who the singer was. then realised it was renee's. just feel that i could relate to the song lyrics in many ways. was watching xing guang da dao and one of the judges said that there's always one song that could represent you at each phase of your life. just thought it was so true. that's what i love about chinese songs. cos you can always find a song that matches what you feel at any point of time.
我等的人会是谁
歌手:陈嘉唯 词：林怡芬 曲：李偲菘
我的故事 也许比较特别
走过的路 也许比较迂回
黑暗之中 全凭着直觉
Keep my faith watch my steps
一步步 靠直觉
也许有天 生命中会出现
那一个谁走进我的心里面
他不必是个Mr. Perfect
只要他 善良体贴
be my friend and my soul mate
我等的人会是谁 何时才出现
Make me whole make me brave
我等的人会是谁 不急在眼前
I can wait I will Pray
也许有天 生命中会出现
那一个谁走进我的心里面
他不必是个Mr. Perfect
只要他 善良体贴
be my friend and my soul mate
我等的人会是谁 何时才出现
Make me whole make me brave
我等的人会是谁 希望他了解
不管迷惘或坚决 都是我的某一面
我并不追求完美 只要能 用心体会
每一天 都是Better day
我等的人会是谁 何时才出现
Make me whole make me brave
我等的人会是谁 何时才出现
陪着我 一天一点
让生命 能变得更美
ok fine i shall not be distracted further and start reading thru my notes.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
hopeless lack of self-discipline
sigh i'm really hopeless. exams are in slightly more than a day's time and i just watched 3 hrs worth of variety shows. what can i say about myself other than having no self-discipline!
then again, i've been rushing thru the content of all my modules, which isn't good for my brain at all. have been getting horrible bouts of headache since a few days ago.
doesn't help that my papers are all so close to each other.
mon 5pm - ais
tues 5pm - finance
wed 9am - service ops
fri 9am - ma
next tues 9am - macro
i can say i'm totally unprepared for ais. i'm 3/4 way thru mis, but haven't even TOUCHED ais can. have been focussing on completing the content for finance and service ops, which sadly, aren't as detailed as i'd like it to be.
can't wait for exams to end. then again, i haven't planned anything during the hols yet, except for the one week to taiwan, and twice-a-week tuition. not really time to think of all these yeah.
and i really can't stand planning for modules. got to clear science gem but can't seem to find anyone to take anything with. core mods are worse. only have apb and bizcomm in mind. sigh. and i guess i should decide if i want to continue with my mpp soon.
wish me luck for exams.=)
then again, i've been rushing thru the content of all my modules, which isn't good for my brain at all. have been getting horrible bouts of headache since a few days ago.
doesn't help that my papers are all so close to each other.
mon 5pm - ais
tues 5pm - finance
wed 9am - service ops
fri 9am - ma
next tues 9am - macro
i can say i'm totally unprepared for ais. i'm 3/4 way thru mis, but haven't even TOUCHED ais can. have been focussing on completing the content for finance and service ops, which sadly, aren't as detailed as i'd like it to be.
can't wait for exams to end. then again, i haven't planned anything during the hols yet, except for the one week to taiwan, and twice-a-week tuition. not really time to think of all these yeah.
and i really can't stand planning for modules. got to clear science gem but can't seem to find anyone to take anything with. core mods are worse. only have apb and bizcomm in mind. sigh. and i guess i should decide if i want to continue with my mpp soon.
wish me luck for exams.=)
Thursday, November 20, 2008
mug
i'm FINALLY feeling the sense of urgency to mug hard for the upcoming exams. have been allowing myself too much slack the last few days that i haven't been achieving much. plus i'm getting easily bored from mugging due to my sub-conscious change in studying style - from reading each chapter and doing its tutorial together, to reading ALL the chapters and then doing all the tutorials and practice papers at one go. i wonder if this switch will have any adverse effect on my results.=X
the trigger of my sudden sense of urgency came from the need to edit the 20-page service ops report. i took 7 hrs of full concentration in the afternoon to complete the editing, and somehow that totally drained my energy for the day. coupled with waking up late in the morning, it resulted in a low productivity of only 2 mis chapters (the first two chapters only somemore) the entire day. felt quite bad for it, since i'm now officially left with only 4 days to finish 4 modules due to my horrible exam schedule.
didn't help that i was feeling so irritated with my specs which was giving me a headache that i switched to wearing contact lens. i dun usually wear contact lens at home lar, but somehow, it left me with no choice today.
went to school to mug ytd with bro, who totally pangseh-ed in the end which made me rather pissed the entire day. spent 1 1/2 hr photocopying finance and mis textbooks in the morning, which was the main aim of going to school actually. in the end mugged in the seminar room with dennis. seems weird that i'm mugging at home now especially since i was totally against it in the past. guess now that i can't really find mugging partners, and the fact that i'm broke and dun want to spend more money on food in school, i'd rather save on travelling time and mug at home instead. the trade-off of cos would be the wastage of time on the ultimate distractor - laptop.
ah well. time to rethink my strategy of mugging to accelerate my learning. if not, i think i'd end up unprepared for all my papers.
the trigger of my sudden sense of urgency came from the need to edit the 20-page service ops report. i took 7 hrs of full concentration in the afternoon to complete the editing, and somehow that totally drained my energy for the day. coupled with waking up late in the morning, it resulted in a low productivity of only 2 mis chapters (the first two chapters only somemore) the entire day. felt quite bad for it, since i'm now officially left with only 4 days to finish 4 modules due to my horrible exam schedule.
didn't help that i was feeling so irritated with my specs which was giving me a headache that i switched to wearing contact lens. i dun usually wear contact lens at home lar, but somehow, it left me with no choice today.
went to school to mug ytd with bro, who totally pangseh-ed in the end which made me rather pissed the entire day. spent 1 1/2 hr photocopying finance and mis textbooks in the morning, which was the main aim of going to school actually. in the end mugged in the seminar room with dennis. seems weird that i'm mugging at home now especially since i was totally against it in the past. guess now that i can't really find mugging partners, and the fact that i'm broke and dun want to spend more money on food in school, i'd rather save on travelling time and mug at home instead. the trade-off of cos would be the wastage of time on the ultimate distractor - laptop.
ah well. time to rethink my strategy of mugging to accelerate my learning. if not, i think i'd end up unprepared for all my papers.
Saturday, November 15, 2008
i really feel like screaming out loud
i just can't stand your inability to empathize with people. yes this society has a lot of people who are problematic, but what can we do? barge into their house, raise your voice and tell them that their thinking is wrong? come on lar, as much as we recognise that there are problems in the way society works, you have to empathize with people about why they think the way they do. it's not just a simple matter of they being stupid and unable to see what's wrong and right.
and yes, there are people like me who can sit down, acknowledge that these people are wrong, and yet still keep quiet about it and allow it to go on cos we dun want to find trouble. as you said, 我们"这种人"就是这样. but seriously, there are times that we shouldn't overstep our boundaries. different people have different ways of living a life, and what can we do about it? go to every single one of them and scold them off? tell them that the things they are doing are wrong and they should just die in an accident cos our society doesn't need people like them? how are we helping them like that man.
and furthermore, YOUR views are not necessarily right. i just can't stand it when you like, or should i say LOVE, to impose your views on others. different people think differently, and just because someone doesn't subscribe to your thinking means they are wrong? come on lar, the world doesn't revolve around you. and what YOU think might not be what people think. sometimes you really have to learn how to stand in people's shoes and think from their points of view. there's a reason why parents are overprotective of their kids, and i think that's just human nature. you said you'd slap your child if he or she does something wrong, but i'm sure by the time it comes when you have your own kid, you wouldn't even bear to.
sometimes, violence and taking the hard approach really doesn't work anymore. i dun understand why you think violence can solve everything. yes people are afraid of violence, but does that solve the root of the problem? does it mean that by using violence, everything would stop?
what i can't stand most is why mum is forever allowing you to show your temper like that. i can't stand it when we're in the middle of the argument and she signals to me to stop arguing with you. it's not as if i'm wrong, and by raising my point of view, it's wrong?! can't you tell that even your parents are overprotective of you? so protective that even i as a sister cannot raise my point of view to argue with you. everyone in the family must give in to you when you raise your voice. in fact, everyone gives in to you EVERYTIME. and for me, i'm EXPECTED to be independent.
you know why i become "这种人"? it's cos since young, i've been conditioned to give in to you in order to avoid trouble. because i know that arguing with you is useless. either it ends up with something getting broken, or i'll be stopped by someone else.
mum doesn't even dare to tell me that she sent bro ALL THE WAY to school when he was supposed to reach at 8am. the previous week when i was supposed to reach by 8am, she didn't even send me. you say i'm pampered, hell yes i am, but doesn't it occur to you WHY i am pampered? because what i want is just the same treatment that you receive. but i never even gotten that. mum said bro is more filial and more dong shi than me, yes i do admit that. i've never denied that. but has it ever occurred to her why? since young, i've always had to play second fiddle. and just because your temper is bad, everything you do always seem to be right and i've always been expected to give in to you. so what's my role in the family?!
and when i'm feeling inferior even in my own house, because i'm not treated as an equal, it's no wonder such inferiority complex is so inate in me.
yes i'm healthier physically, but i do believe i'm not mentally. sometimes i really do doubt my own existence in this world.
and i'm really a useless person. the only thing i do about all these is to rant about it in this blog, lock myself up in my room and cry to myself. no wonder i'm labelled as “这种人".
and yes, there are people like me who can sit down, acknowledge that these people are wrong, and yet still keep quiet about it and allow it to go on cos we dun want to find trouble. as you said, 我们"这种人"就是这样. but seriously, there are times that we shouldn't overstep our boundaries. different people have different ways of living a life, and what can we do about it? go to every single one of them and scold them off? tell them that the things they are doing are wrong and they should just die in an accident cos our society doesn't need people like them? how are we helping them like that man.
and furthermore, YOUR views are not necessarily right. i just can't stand it when you like, or should i say LOVE, to impose your views on others. different people think differently, and just because someone doesn't subscribe to your thinking means they are wrong? come on lar, the world doesn't revolve around you. and what YOU think might not be what people think. sometimes you really have to learn how to stand in people's shoes and think from their points of view. there's a reason why parents are overprotective of their kids, and i think that's just human nature. you said you'd slap your child if he or she does something wrong, but i'm sure by the time it comes when you have your own kid, you wouldn't even bear to.
sometimes, violence and taking the hard approach really doesn't work anymore. i dun understand why you think violence can solve everything. yes people are afraid of violence, but does that solve the root of the problem? does it mean that by using violence, everything would stop?
what i can't stand most is why mum is forever allowing you to show your temper like that. i can't stand it when we're in the middle of the argument and she signals to me to stop arguing with you. it's not as if i'm wrong, and by raising my point of view, it's wrong?! can't you tell that even your parents are overprotective of you? so protective that even i as a sister cannot raise my point of view to argue with you. everyone in the family must give in to you when you raise your voice. in fact, everyone gives in to you EVERYTIME. and for me, i'm EXPECTED to be independent.
you know why i become "这种人"? it's cos since young, i've been conditioned to give in to you in order to avoid trouble. because i know that arguing with you is useless. either it ends up with something getting broken, or i'll be stopped by someone else.
mum doesn't even dare to tell me that she sent bro ALL THE WAY to school when he was supposed to reach at 8am. the previous week when i was supposed to reach by 8am, she didn't even send me. you say i'm pampered, hell yes i am, but doesn't it occur to you WHY i am pampered? because what i want is just the same treatment that you receive. but i never even gotten that. mum said bro is more filial and more dong shi than me, yes i do admit that. i've never denied that. but has it ever occurred to her why? since young, i've always had to play second fiddle. and just because your temper is bad, everything you do always seem to be right and i've always been expected to give in to you. so what's my role in the family?!
and when i'm feeling inferior even in my own house, because i'm not treated as an equal, it's no wonder such inferiority complex is so inate in me.
yes i'm healthier physically, but i do believe i'm not mentally. sometimes i really do doubt my own existence in this world.
and i'm really a useless person. the only thing i do about all these is to rant about it in this blog, lock myself up in my room and cry to myself. no wonder i'm labelled as “这种人".
Thursday, November 13, 2008
unpredictability of life
黎楚宁自杀死了？！？！本来有点不敢相信，现在只能感叹，人生无常啊！
原本还蛮期待她出专辑，但这不可能了吧。这么有才华的人，就这样为情而自杀，真的很可惜。
人生总比你想象中来得有意义，当你觉得你已一无所有，你一定是忽略了一些东西。当你觉得身边没有人在乎你时, 你一定是忘了珍惜某个人的存在. 我总觉得一个人的人生不可能山穷水尽, 重要的是你想不想的开, 珍不珍惜所拥有的一切, 就算是比别人少又怎样.
可笑的是, 我总是那个想不开的人.
原本还蛮期待她出专辑，但这不可能了吧。这么有才华的人，就这样为情而自杀，真的很可惜。
人生总比你想象中来得有意义，当你觉得你已一无所有，你一定是忽略了一些东西。当你觉得身边没有人在乎你时, 你一定是忘了珍惜某个人的存在. 我总觉得一个人的人生不可能山穷水尽, 重要的是你想不想的开, 珍不珍惜所拥有的一切, 就算是比别人少又怎样.
可笑的是, 我总是那个想不开的人.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
突然想起你
got hooked on this song. love the way the emotions were sung out by ah xin, and of cos, the lyrics. it just have a way of tugging at your heartstrings.
突然想起你 - 五月天
最怕空气突然安静
最怕朋友突然的关心
最怕回忆 突然翻滚绞痛着 不平息
最怕突然 听到你的消息
想念如果会有声音 不愿那是悲伤的哭泣
事到如今 终于让自己属于 我自己
只剩眼泪 还骗不过自己
突然好想你 你会在哪里 过得快乐或委屈
突然好想你 突然锋利的回忆 突然模糊的眼睛
我们像一首最美丽的歌曲
变成两部悲伤的电影
为什么你 带我走过最难忘的旅行
然后留下 最痛的纪念品
我们 那么甜那么美那么相信 那么疯那么热烈的曾经
为何我们还是要奔向各算的幸福和遗憾中老去
突然好想你 你会在哪里 过得快乐或委屈
突然好想你 突然锋利的回忆 突然模糊的眼睛
最怕空气突然安静 最怕朋友突然的关心
最怕回忆 突然翻滚绞痛着 不平息
最怕突然 听到你的消息
最怕此生 已经决心自己过 没有你 却又突然 听到你的消息
all presentations and projects are finally over! the only thing left now is the service ops 20-page report that we have not submitted. here comes the time to really mug and try not to let my cap drop that much.=X
time really flies...almost the end of my third semester in uni! omg...
congrats to the guys who have ord-ed!=)
camped in hss library for the last two days studying for finance quiz. i must say both days were quite productive. somehow i really dunno how and where to start for my mugging. ah well. first, to finish watching all the macro webcasts.
突然想起你 - 五月天
最怕空气突然安静
最怕朋友突然的关心
最怕回忆 突然翻滚绞痛着 不平息
最怕突然 听到你的消息
想念如果会有声音 不愿那是悲伤的哭泣
事到如今 终于让自己属于 我自己
只剩眼泪 还骗不过自己
突然好想你 你会在哪里 过得快乐或委屈
突然好想你 突然锋利的回忆 突然模糊的眼睛
我们像一首最美丽的歌曲
变成两部悲伤的电影
为什么你 带我走过最难忘的旅行
然后留下 最痛的纪念品
我们 那么甜那么美那么相信 那么疯那么热烈的曾经
为何我们还是要奔向各算的幸福和遗憾中老去
突然好想你 你会在哪里 过得快乐或委屈
突然好想你 突然锋利的回忆 突然模糊的眼睛
最怕空气突然安静 最怕朋友突然的关心
最怕回忆 突然翻滚绞痛着 不平息
最怕突然 听到你的消息
最怕此生 已经决心自己过 没有你 却又突然 听到你的消息
all presentations and projects are finally over! the only thing left now is the service ops 20-page report that we have not submitted. here comes the time to really mug and try not to let my cap drop that much.=X
time really flies...almost the end of my third semester in uni! omg...
congrats to the guys who have ord-ed!=)
camped in hss library for the last two days studying for finance quiz. i must say both days were quite productive. somehow i really dunno how and where to start for my mugging. ah well. first, to finish watching all the macro webcasts.
Sunday, November 9, 2008
夏雨诗
nice song!
夏雨诗 - 潘裕文
等候在 骤来的 夏夜暴雨 时间突然静止
滂沱的 雨势中 停泊两段 迂回著的心事
忽然间 所有的 谈笑风生 瞬间戛然而止
靠著我 挡著你 风雨之中 不让你被淋湿
我们在这个城市 流浪多少日子
却从来没有想到 有人能分享 你倾覆的心事
没有了你叮咛的日子 耳朵总感觉怅然若失
生活上来了又去 得了又失 是你给我扶持
不断寻觅错过了几次 从来不知爱近在咫尺
回头发现 熬过这些日子 总有你的影子
孤独在 各自的 人生旅途 安静或是飞驰
遇见了 彼此后 两个灵魂 不再患得患失
有些话 想启齿 欲言又止 你耐心等我解释
微笑著 不说话 把我抱住 让我像个孩子
在光阴这趟车上 浪费了多少日子
遇见你却让过去 所有的痛楚 通通被稀释
没有了你叮咛的日子 耳朵总感觉怅然若失
生活上来了又去 得了又失 是你给我扶持
不断寻觅错过了几次 从来不知爱近在咫尺
回头发现 熬过这些日子 总有你的影子
没有了你倾诉的日子 耳朵就感觉怅然若失
生活上来了又去 得了又失 你是我的坚持
陪我同游余生的日子 就算走到了穷途末日
天涯咫尺 在人生的白纸 同愉快的写诗
nice lyrics and tune!=)
i'm actually quite looking forward to listening to the songs by xing guang bang. i think all of them have their own charisma which makes it quite exciting and interesting to see how they progress in the music industry.
had a weird dream in the morning. dreamt of me going for my finance quiz late and then chong telling me that i can't take it anymore since i was late. so no marks for that quiz.=( i was how shocked lar. HAHA!
why did you have to remind me of those painful memories of doing nothing and just waiting for a reply to come in? it's even more painful to pretend as if nothing happened.
parents went to KL in the morning. they are going overseas 3 times in 6 months lar! first KL then taiwan then guangzhou! haha but ok lar, time for them to relax too. just that bro and i have to end up eating instant noodles or canned food for 3 whole days!=X
time to mug! since bro is driving to school tmr, i shall follow him early in the morning even though my lessons start at 2pm. 2 weeks to chiong 13 weeks of syllabus! jiayou!!!=)
夏雨诗 - 潘裕文
等候在 骤来的 夏夜暴雨 时间突然静止
滂沱的 雨势中 停泊两段 迂回著的心事
忽然间 所有的 谈笑风生 瞬间戛然而止
靠著我 挡著你 风雨之中 不让你被淋湿
我们在这个城市 流浪多少日子
却从来没有想到 有人能分享 你倾覆的心事
没有了你叮咛的日子 耳朵总感觉怅然若失
生活上来了又去 得了又失 是你给我扶持
不断寻觅错过了几次 从来不知爱近在咫尺
回头发现 熬过这些日子 总有你的影子
孤独在 各自的 人生旅途 安静或是飞驰
遇见了 彼此后 两个灵魂 不再患得患失
有些话 想启齿 欲言又止 你耐心等我解释
微笑著 不说话 把我抱住 让我像个孩子
在光阴这趟车上 浪费了多少日子
遇见你却让过去 所有的痛楚 通通被稀释
没有了你叮咛的日子 耳朵总感觉怅然若失
生活上来了又去 得了又失 是你给我扶持
不断寻觅错过了几次 从来不知爱近在咫尺
回头发现 熬过这些日子 总有你的影子
没有了你倾诉的日子 耳朵就感觉怅然若失
生活上来了又去 得了又失 你是我的坚持
陪我同游余生的日子 就算走到了穷途末日
天涯咫尺 在人生的白纸 同愉快的写诗
nice lyrics and tune!=)
i'm actually quite looking forward to listening to the songs by xing guang bang. i think all of them have their own charisma which makes it quite exciting and interesting to see how they progress in the music industry.
had a weird dream in the morning. dreamt of me going for my finance quiz late and then chong telling me that i can't take it anymore since i was late. so no marks for that quiz.=( i was how shocked lar. HAHA!
why did you have to remind me of those painful memories of doing nothing and just waiting for a reply to come in? it's even more painful to pretend as if nothing happened.
parents went to KL in the morning. they are going overseas 3 times in 6 months lar! first KL then taiwan then guangzhou! haha but ok lar, time for them to relax too. just that bro and i have to end up eating instant noodles or canned food for 3 whole days!=X
time to mug! since bro is driving to school tmr, i shall follow him early in the morning even though my lessons start at 2pm. 2 weeks to chiong 13 weeks of syllabus! jiayou!!!=)
Saturday, November 8, 2008
service operations is (almost) over!!
after today's 1 hr presentation, i really feel quite relieved! all major presentations are over.=)
presentation went fine i suppose. once again couldn't resist the temptation of my cue cards. sigh.
after that was quantum of solace with BR people for bizad night to the movies! it's always fun being with BR people. christmas and new year's eve parties!!!=D
shall leave with some photos and videos of my dsc 3203 module. enjoy!
HAHA! you'll see a lot of similar expressions in the photos that follow.
us after visiting g4 for the last time.
our group!
with one of g4's staff.
with two of g4's staff
yet another one...
girls with the pool table!
HAHA dun be frightened by me!=P
and the next two are short videos made by janny for our presentation!
our introduction video...
and our ending video!=)
presentation went fine i suppose. once again couldn't resist the temptation of my cue cards. sigh.
after that was quantum of solace with BR people for bizad night to the movies! it's always fun being with BR people. christmas and new year's eve parties!!!=D
shall leave with some photos and videos of my dsc 3203 module. enjoy!
HAHA! you'll see a lot of similar expressions in the photos that follow.
us after visiting g4 for the last time.
our group!
with one of g4's staff.
with two of g4's staff
yet another one...
girls with the pool table!
HAHA dun be frightened by me!=P
and the next two are short videos made by janny for our presentation!
our introduction video...
and our ending video!=)
Friday, November 7, 2008
why...?
i cried in the bus again...
maybe long late night journey home induce tears in me.
or maybe the stress from projects and exams is making me emotionally unstable.
whatever it is, i really hate myself.
why am i so short-tempered?
why am i so elitist?
why am i STILL so horrible at expressing myself?
you know sometimes i really feel like i have no true friends around me. i was so pissed off just now but i just couldn't find anyone to call, so i ended up thinking too much and bursting into tears.
sometimes what i want are not solutions to my problems when i confide in others, i just want a listening ear. it never works to rationalise my emotions with me, cos i do that hell lot within myself. it just happens that it never works for me.
一声“我懂”对我来说真得很重要。
but some friends just make me feel worse about myself.
at the end of the journey, i was thinking to myself, "what do i possess?"
and i concluded that i have nothing.
now i sorta get why people get depressed or even think of suicide.
and as always, something made me feel bad about thinking about all these again.
Stay the Same by Joey Mcintyre started playing in my ipod.
Don't you ever wish you were someone else,
You were meant to be the way you are exactly.
Don't you ever say you don't like the way you are.
When you learn to love yourself, you're better off by far.
And I hope you always stay the same
Cuz there's nothin' 'bout you I would change.
I think that you could be whatever you wanted to be
If you could realize, all the dreams you have inside.
Don't be afraid if you've got something to say,
Just open up your heart and let it show you the way.
Believe in yourself.
Reach down inside.
The love you find will set you free.
Believe in yourself, you will come alive.
Have faith in what you do.
You'll make it through.
maybe long late night journey home induce tears in me.
or maybe the stress from projects and exams is making me emotionally unstable.
whatever it is, i really hate myself.
why am i so short-tempered?
why am i so elitist?
why am i STILL so horrible at expressing myself?
you know sometimes i really feel like i have no true friends around me. i was so pissed off just now but i just couldn't find anyone to call, so i ended up thinking too much and bursting into tears.
sometimes what i want are not solutions to my problems when i confide in others, i just want a listening ear. it never works to rationalise my emotions with me, cos i do that hell lot within myself. it just happens that it never works for me.
一声“我懂”对我来说真得很重要。
but some friends just make me feel worse about myself.
at the end of the journey, i was thinking to myself, "what do i possess?"
and i concluded that i have nothing.
now i sorta get why people get depressed or even think of suicide.
and as always, something made me feel bad about thinking about all these again.
Stay the Same by Joey Mcintyre started playing in my ipod.
Don't you ever wish you were someone else,
You were meant to be the way you are exactly.
Don't you ever say you don't like the way you are.
When you learn to love yourself, you're better off by far.
And I hope you always stay the same
Cuz there's nothin' 'bout you I would change.
I think that you could be whatever you wanted to be
If you could realize, all the dreams you have inside.
Don't be afraid if you've got something to say,
Just open up your heart and let it show you the way.
Believe in yourself.
Reach down inside.
The love you find will set you free.
Believe in yourself, you will come alive.
Have faith in what you do.
You'll make it through.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
牺牲小我， 完成大我
the day ended well. dinner with BR at munchie monkeys. kinda miss post-foc days when we can sit down for the longest times and talk about anything. everybody's just too busy now i guess. i hardly even see some of them now.
"and somehow i keep forgetting to thank amelia (i know u'll read this) cos without you i think BR wouldnt be that united too. thanks for all ur efforts every time okay! ((:"
from vivien's post! i think without your enthusiasm, i would be too paiseh to be enthu too! really glad we have BR. of cos with a great aogl (i wouldn't say the same for the ogl!=P) and i know you'll read this too!=D
slept super early (11pm) last night and woke up at 9am this morning. i really can't remember the last time i slept for so long already. but it felt really good. was just too tired last night lar.
the guys are ord-ing soon! it's quite amusing to hear them being so on about it. i think it's been a long time since something can make them so happy. HAHA!=)
nadjad sent us this link in the buckle-buckley yahoogroup (which has been dormant for about 2 years now) from TODAY online. quite an inspiring story i must say.
The Director Who Became Poor
Have you ever laid in bed distressed by this nagging question: “God, why am I rich?” Thought not. Well, Dylan Wilk has. So disturbed was he that he gave up his high-flying lifestyle to build houses for the poor in the Philippines. He started by selling his car. “I was depressed after doing it,” says Wilk, 33. It was a poignant move because Wilk, born to a poor family, had always wanted to be rich. At 20, he took a loan of about £2,500 ($5,955) from a foundation set up by Prince Charles and started Gameplay, a business selling computer games. In five years, it became Europe’s largest direct-selling computer games business. For the record, Wilk was, according to The Guardian, the ninth richest man in the United Kingdom under the age of 30, eight years ago. At 25, he listed his computer games business on the London Stock Exchange, and became the youngest director of a public-listed company then. With the cash from the sale of his car — one of several BMWs he owned alongside a Ferrari and a Porsche — he flew to the Philippines, and visited Gawad Kalinga (GK) sites there. Translated as “to give care”, GK positions itself as an alternative solution to poverty. Its vision for the Philippines is a slum-free, squatter-free nation through providing land for the landless, homes for the homeless, and food for the hungry. The price of his car would have built 80 homes, but when he offered the money to GK’s founder Tony Meloto, it was suggested he return to the Philippines instead. Wilk is in Singapore to speak to students at Halogen Foundation Singapore’s annual National Young Leaders’ Day and National Primary Young Leaders’Day. The foundation is a non-profit organisation. These days, his home is Manila, where he is GK’s International Partnerships Coordinator. “I drive an eight-year-old car and live in a small house,” he said. The transition was not all-smooth. The “depression” of losing his car was just the start of birth pangs. “The biggest obstacle ... was myself,” he said. “I had this romantic notion of what it was to help people. It was a great change in lifestyle and it was definitely painful to sacrifice.” The second obstacle was his family. Wilk had sold his company and spent six months looking at different charities to work with, from South-east Asia to South America. “My family was very concerned andthought I was going crazy,” he recalled. When he decided on GK, “my mum thought I was brainwashed by a cult. So she decided to follow me to the Philippines to spy on me,” he said. After his mum was assured, “my sister thought that my mum was being brainwashed, too!” Crime syndicates are another problem he has to deal with. “They don’t want poverty to change because they benefit from it. For example, when we first arrived at a mangrove swamp to help revamp it, it was barricaded because there was someone illegally leasing out land to the poor,” he said. “We spent two years enlisting the help of many important people to help remove the guy.” Thus, he has become “more patient, more caring, and more focused on empowering others. Before, “the bottomline was everything”. “I’ve found the joy in building relationships with people,” he said. He returned to the Philippines after the first time, intending to stay for six weeks. That was five years ago. He subsequently fell in love with the eldest daughter of GK’s founder and now is the father of two daughters, aged one and three. “I am still amazed at my journey, and where we are going,” he said. “When I first joined GK, we were helping 80 villages. Now we’ve helped 1,700 villages and a quarter of a million people.” GK is now in Cambodia, Indonesia and Papua New Guinea. It will be in East Timor soon. And it all started for Wilk after one night in a Beverly Hills hotel. “I was thinking about how much I had, and how it was never going to be enough,” he said. “I used to change cars every six months ... While others ask God why they are poor, I started asking God why I was rich and what he wanted from me. I looked at all the rich people around me, and realised that most had family or alcohol problems, and few were satisfied. “I didn’t want to be like that in 20 years ... ”
"and somehow i keep forgetting to thank amelia (i know u'll read this) cos without you i think BR wouldnt be that united too. thanks for all ur efforts every time okay! ((:"
from vivien's post! i think without your enthusiasm, i would be too paiseh to be enthu too! really glad we have BR. of cos with a great aogl (i wouldn't say the same for the ogl!=P) and i know you'll read this too!=D
slept super early (11pm) last night and woke up at 9am this morning. i really can't remember the last time i slept for so long already. but it felt really good. was just too tired last night lar.
the guys are ord-ing soon! it's quite amusing to hear them being so on about it. i think it's been a long time since something can make them so happy. HAHA!=)
nadjad sent us this link in the buckle-buckley yahoogroup (which has been dormant for about 2 years now) from TODAY online. quite an inspiring story i must say.
The Director Who Became Poor
Have you ever laid in bed distressed by this nagging question: “God, why am I rich?” Thought not. Well, Dylan Wilk has. So disturbed was he that he gave up his high-flying lifestyle to build houses for the poor in the Philippines. He started by selling his car. “I was depressed after doing it,” says Wilk, 33. It was a poignant move because Wilk, born to a poor family, had always wanted to be rich. At 20, he took a loan of about £2,500 ($5,955) from a foundation set up by Prince Charles and started Gameplay, a business selling computer games. In five years, it became Europe’s largest direct-selling computer games business. For the record, Wilk was, according to The Guardian, the ninth richest man in the United Kingdom under the age of 30, eight years ago. At 25, he listed his computer games business on the London Stock Exchange, and became the youngest director of a public-listed company then. With the cash from the sale of his car — one of several BMWs he owned alongside a Ferrari and a Porsche — he flew to the Philippines, and visited Gawad Kalinga (GK) sites there. Translated as “to give care”, GK positions itself as an alternative solution to poverty. Its vision for the Philippines is a slum-free, squatter-free nation through providing land for the landless, homes for the homeless, and food for the hungry. The price of his car would have built 80 homes, but when he offered the money to GK’s founder Tony Meloto, it was suggested he return to the Philippines instead. Wilk is in Singapore to speak to students at Halogen Foundation Singapore’s annual National Young Leaders’ Day and National Primary Young Leaders’Day. The foundation is a non-profit organisation. These days, his home is Manila, where he is GK’s International Partnerships Coordinator. “I drive an eight-year-old car and live in a small house,” he said. The transition was not all-smooth. The “depression” of losing his car was just the start of birth pangs. “The biggest obstacle ... was myself,” he said. “I had this romantic notion of what it was to help people. It was a great change in lifestyle and it was definitely painful to sacrifice.” The second obstacle was his family. Wilk had sold his company and spent six months looking at different charities to work with, from South-east Asia to South America. “My family was very concerned andthought I was going crazy,” he recalled. When he decided on GK, “my mum thought I was brainwashed by a cult. So she decided to follow me to the Philippines to spy on me,” he said. After his mum was assured, “my sister thought that my mum was being brainwashed, too!” Crime syndicates are another problem he has to deal with. “They don’t want poverty to change because they benefit from it. For example, when we first arrived at a mangrove swamp to help revamp it, it was barricaded because there was someone illegally leasing out land to the poor,” he said. “We spent two years enlisting the help of many important people to help remove the guy.” Thus, he has become “more patient, more caring, and more focused on empowering others. Before, “the bottomline was everything”. “I’ve found the joy in building relationships with people,” he said. He returned to the Philippines after the first time, intending to stay for six weeks. That was five years ago. He subsequently fell in love with the eldest daughter of GK’s founder and now is the father of two daughters, aged one and three. “I am still amazed at my journey, and where we are going,” he said. “When I first joined GK, we were helping 80 villages. Now we’ve helped 1,700 villages and a quarter of a million people.” GK is now in Cambodia, Indonesia and Papua New Guinea. It will be in East Timor soon. And it all started for Wilk after one night in a Beverly Hills hotel. “I was thinking about how much I had, and how it was never going to be enough,” he said. “I used to change cars every six months ... While others ask God why they are poor, I started asking God why I was rich and what he wanted from me. I looked at all the rich people around me, and realised that most had family or alcohol problems, and few were satisfied. “I didn’t want to be like that in 20 years ... ”
Monday, November 3, 2008
tired...
two modules down! other than the final papers of cos. but at least dun have to go crazy for mis and macro anymore.=)
left with service ops presentation (this fri!!) and report (21 nov) as well as ma and finance tutorial presentation (both next week). JIAYOU!! i need to get down to mugging real soon.
weekend has been madness chionging all the work. wasn't as productive as i hoped to be though, but at least completed the mis presentation and individual assignment which were the more urgent ones. the major obstacle is dsc presentation this fri...hope everything goes on smoothly!!
sometimes i dunno if i should say that i'm lucky. when i was SOO not looking forward to the bus journey back home today, i saw daryk they all walking past! and of cos i got a lift home too.=) maybe i should start looking at the brighter side of life and be happy with such small things in life. maybe, just maybe, i'll be much happier and contented.
went for wang lee hom's concert on saturday night thanks to daniel's free tickets! and it was real good. he really is very shuai and charismatic, and the entire concert was filled with surprises. how he appeared on stage with 3 other look-alikes. totally couldn't tell which one was him. then the exciting part was, when he did a disappearing act, the next moment, he appeared right next to my seat! so i was just 2 seats away from him....too bad my camera's shutter speed too slow, he was actually looking at my direction and i could have snapped better photos! ah well, i shall be contented!=)
my best photo of the night.=)
isn't he really good-looking...=P
talented him on piano!
zhizhong and amy at the concert.
guanghao and amy! look at the crowd behind!
it was a rather good break from the craziness of the weekend. and of cos i got to listen to nice live songs. time to get back to my work....
left with service ops presentation (this fri!!) and report (21 nov) as well as ma and finance tutorial presentation (both next week). JIAYOU!! i need to get down to mugging real soon.
weekend has been madness chionging all the work. wasn't as productive as i hoped to be though, but at least completed the mis presentation and individual assignment which were the more urgent ones. the major obstacle is dsc presentation this fri...hope everything goes on smoothly!!
sometimes i dunno if i should say that i'm lucky. when i was SOO not looking forward to the bus journey back home today, i saw daryk they all walking past! and of cos i got a lift home too.=) maybe i should start looking at the brighter side of life and be happy with such small things in life. maybe, just maybe, i'll be much happier and contented.
went for wang lee hom's concert on saturday night thanks to daniel's free tickets! and it was real good. he really is very shuai and charismatic, and the entire concert was filled with surprises. how he appeared on stage with 3 other look-alikes. totally couldn't tell which one was him. then the exciting part was, when he did a disappearing act, the next moment, he appeared right next to my seat! so i was just 2 seats away from him....too bad my camera's shutter speed too slow, he was actually looking at my direction and i could have snapped better photos! ah well, i shall be contented!=)
my best photo of the night.=)
isn't he really good-looking...=P
talented him on piano!
zhizhong and amy at the concert.
guanghao and amy! look at the crowd behind!
it was a rather good break from the craziness of the weekend. and of cos i got to listen to nice live songs. time to get back to my work....
Saturday, November 1, 2008
project madness
it's amazing how projects can drive you crazy and make you reach home at the craziest timings.
francine asked me, "how come you're doing projects everytime i see you?" i also wonder why rite.
for the past week, i've been reaching home past 11pm.
Saturday: 11pm (rag welfare treat)
Sunday: 11pm (BR outing)
Monday: 1230am (clique outing)
Tuesday: 1230am (dsc makeup lecture + ding tai fung + B&Js)
Wednesday: 11pm (ais project)
Thursday: 1245am (macro assignment)
Friday: 1215am (dsc project)
it's no wonder that my mum actually suspects i have a bf. yeah my bf are all my modules, and his home is school rite.
luckily i have wonderful friends like farah, daryk and marcus who send me home sometimes. if not i really wonder how much more money i'm gonna spend on cab fare.
doesn't help that i still have one whole long list of things to do over the weekend:
- DSC presentation slides and script (by wed)
- MIS presentation (by mon)
- MIS individual assignment (by mon)
- Macro problem set 4 (by sun)
- MA tutorials 9&10 (by mon)
- Finance tutorial (by tues)
ahhh this is really quite a trying period. i was complaining about all my workload, and ja suddenly just reminded me that i'm taking 5 core modules this sem. wow, somehow it didn't really occur to me that the crazy workload might be due to the fact that i'm taking 5 core mods. i just conveniently forgot that fact.
my freshies are all so stressed i also dunno how to help them...
anw, i sorta recovered rather quickly from ytd's emo-ness. i guess maybe i just break down too easily without real reason for such times. and special thanks to b2 for listening to all my complaints. thanks for always lending a ear whenever i need it.=)
francine asked me, "how come you're doing projects everytime i see you?" i also wonder why rite.
for the past week, i've been reaching home past 11pm.
Saturday: 11pm (rag welfare treat)
Sunday: 11pm (BR outing)
Monday: 1230am (clique outing)
Tuesday: 1230am (dsc makeup lecture + ding tai fung + B&Js)
Wednesday: 11pm (ais project)
Thursday: 1245am (macro assignment)
Friday: 1215am (dsc project)
it's no wonder that my mum actually suspects i have a bf. yeah my bf are all my modules, and his home is school rite.
luckily i have wonderful friends like farah, daryk and marcus who send me home sometimes. if not i really wonder how much more money i'm gonna spend on cab fare.
doesn't help that i still have one whole long list of things to do over the weekend:
- DSC presentation slides and script (by wed)
- MIS presentation (by mon)
- MIS individual assignment (by mon)
- Macro problem set 4 (by sun)
- MA tutorials 9&10 (by mon)
- Finance tutorial (by tues)
ahhh this is really quite a trying period. i was complaining about all my workload, and ja suddenly just reminded me that i'm taking 5 core modules this sem. wow, somehow it didn't really occur to me that the crazy workload might be due to the fact that i'm taking 5 core mods. i just conveniently forgot that fact.
my freshies are all so stressed i also dunno how to help them...
anw, i sorta recovered rather quickly from ytd's emo-ness. i guess maybe i just break down too easily without real reason for such times. and special thanks to b2 for listening to all my complaints. thanks for always lending a ear whenever i need it.=)
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