say anything

say anything

Here I am on
The phone again, and
Awkward silence is
On the other end
I used to know the sound
Of a smile in your voice
But right now (right now)
All I feel (All I feel)
Is the pain of the fighting
Starting up again

All the things we talk about
You know they stay on my mind
On my mind
All the things we laugh about
They'll bring us through it every time
After time after time

Don't say a word
I know you feel the same
Just give me a sign
Say anything, say anything
Please don't walk away
I know you wanna stay
Just give me a sign
Say anything, say anything

Some say that
Time changes
Best friends can
Become strangers
But I don't want that
No, not for you
If you just stay with me, we can make it through
So Here we are again
The same old argument
And now I'm wonderin'
If things'll ever change, yeah
When will you laugh again?
Laugh like you did back when
We'd make noise til 3 AM and the neighbors would complain

All the things we talk about
You know they stay on my mind
On my mind
All the things we laugh about
They'll bring us through it every time
After time after time

Don't say a word
I know you feel the same
Just give me a sign
Say anything, say anything
Please don't walk away
I know you wanna stay
Just give me a sign
Say anything, say anything

I'm fallin'
I'm fallin'
I'm fallin' down
I'm fallin'
I'm fallin'
I'm fallin' down
Down
Down
Down

somehow dis song represents everythg tt's on my mind.
haha good old charlotte.
nitee.

shutting down...

shutting down...

*dead.

a friend, maybe?

a friend, maybe?

haha. ive been thinking about it. i realise it's just a temporarily crush... hoped it'd be over soon. but i know things just arent the same now. and how i wish i could turned back time. and revert everythg. but i guess its too late for me to say so now. And dun worry about sending wrong signals to me. i get the picture now. just want to tell u that u are one extraordinary girl indeed. hehh. dis i would nvr ever forget. i was attracted to u nt entirely by yr looks but by yr character tt stands out from the rest of the girls. but who cares now.
anw. lets shrug off the awkwardness and concentrate on our As first.
nitee.

: )

: )

im gonna watch russell peters and laugh it off.

i give up.

i give up.

yupp, you heard me.

fantasy & reality.

fantasy & reality.

ahh. im at a loss. i want to be asleep for the rest of my life. or be reincarnated as a malnutrition child in ethopia. i want to experience hunger. pain. desperation. and the thought of facing death every minute. those poor kids. i sob and pity for u. may god, allah or buddha be there for u.

let me fall asleep and i hope never to wake up again.

puttin' everythg behind me. lking ahead

puttin' everythg behind me. lking ahead

its time for me to fufill wad ive been set off to do the day i stepped into vjc. gettin' the 4As'. although till today, i am nt even close to tt ridiculous goal of mine, i'd try to redeem myself in the 6 remaining wks to my prelims. in this teeny course of 1 1/2 yrs, i had really made many friends than before. much closer ones. and of course much more from the opposite sex. ive tried out stuff tt i nvr tried out b4. ive gone thru' many invaluable experiences and forged many friendships. all these turned me a more mature person as compared to the chipmunk, timid-like image i portrayed when i stepped into this fine college. college life has indeed prepared me for the next phase of my life. allowin' me to enter the outside world as a determined person.

was studyin' in sch when i heard stuff tt brought my mood down. i didnt expect the hidden meanin' which lies in tt innocent msg. so i decided to admit wad was actually happenin' when i was in the bus. took me 10 mins before i pressed that 'send' button. yupps. but i soon realised tt i did the right thing. ya those stupid flying rumours really affected our r/s and i hoped those actually strengtened it instead of crumpling it. ya. i sense an optimism in the voice u carried. i didnt regret wad i did. like u put it tt noisy and nonsensical boy would be back. but i doubt so. i certainly dun hope tt u were hyprocritical in sayin' all tt. i trust ya. yupps. u restored my confidence. im certainly lking forward to sdd nite now. i know it sounds cliche but lets put the past behind us. lets be friends again.

OEFA.E
results. i was the bottom in the class for 3 of those. but the twinkling 'A' gave me hope. its time to concentrate on my 4As and nthg else. i guess today mark the first time tt i didnt join my brothers' for lanning. sorry. im set out for a more impt task. see u guys soon.

a glitter in yr eye i caught

a glitter in yr eye i caught.

ive been unlucky once and i dun wish for it to happen again. i dun expect much seriously. i hope i can be lucky. lucky for once. confused u might have been, im also in the same state. things are a bit clearer now. i hope it can improved for the better. hai. its coming to an end. fingers crossed. i dreamt of travelling across the desert in search of a better place. i believe tt beyond the horizon lies smthg greater than determination itself but i found myself turning back. hesitation isnt the way to go. shlg i ponder and think or just go ahead. let the past be forgiven the wise once said. but regret is the one thing i cant shake off.

doomsday is in 6 wks. but tt wads i chose to be believe. redemption is wad i aspire. but i somehow dun feel the need for it. i aint satisfied with my failures. but i dun look back. i look forward. time to get rid of tt 1.3 gigbibyte icon lying on my desktop. i shall hope tt my mind rids itself of tt constant addiction of ownage. the power of trying to conquer my thoughts of gaming with fatigue often result in the weakening of my soul. there's always a light at the end of a tunnel. i tell myself. there's hope for me. for everyone. confidence is half the battle won. but there's still hard work.

i dun feel the pressure advancin' on me.
why is that so?
Am i nt being serious?
i'm in a state of despair
i cant jolt myself back to reality.
im still in dreamland.
i need to wake up.
fast.

cyber gamers.

cyber gamers.

'In a Warcraft battlefield, the difference between life & death depends on whether you are on dedicated ADSL broadband.' tt's true. its the catch line for the advertisers of singnet. when u lag, (meaning freezing screen)vulgarities often spewed out in the hope tt u wld nt die or tt the opponent cant escape. im beginnin' to think tt cybergamin' is uncouth with all the vulgarities and stuff. hmm. but its really the only form of entertainment for our stressed minds.

boring day. started with breakfast at mac with jul, yj and bock. yea we skipped assembly and 2 periods of tut. then maths all the way... had class lunch at pizza hut. been quite some time since we had a class lunch. or actually it just consist of half the class la. the rest all nvr really mix with us. hai. wad's with humans and cliques. they are just everywhere. of cos' after tt the brothers' of heaven went lannin' at katong shoppin' centre again. no more dota. battlefield 2 is the in thing. main aim is to capture as many command posts and eliminate yr foes. we had a little game of dota. yj ken bock bra VS nic shawn wahman julian. cos' the noobs lost. haha. we won la. damn shiok and satisfying to see the victory slogan tt appear after u destroy the opposin' forces' throne. it was a gg mann.

hai i dun know wad to do now. i havent had dinner yet. the pizza is still lurking ard with the hcl in my stomach.. and yea everyone's out. i guess im home too early. hehh. weekends are here again and slowly the counting down for the promos has begun. 8 more weeks. zzz. looks like its time to buck up.

im freaking bored. talk to me.

about the sesquipedalian.

about the sesquipedalian.

haha. the nkf saga has finally come to an end with durai and his gang steppin' down plus Mrs goh nt being a patron anymore. this happens after 3 days of bad publishing for nkf's ceo by the media and the online petition tt was setup to support the resignation of durai. it reached ard 34000 signatures just now when i visited it.haha. dis includes me. but still the public wouldnt dare to contribute to nkf now and this episode totally shatter their confidence towards local charities. now they know tt they shld practise greater transparency and accountability by reportin' how much of the public's donation is going to the needy.

oh mann dun get bored by my first para. haha. i like to start thgs with a perspective in mind. my dad always tell me to be generous but dun give to those flag day tins or calling in thru phone or sms to donate. numerous intermediates are involved before the final amount is reached to those at the receiving end. by tt time it might alr been reduced by as much as 60%. tt's why donate either in the form of vehicles or go straight to the party involved. hehh. i wonder whether Mrs goh is involved in this whole sage or nt. i SUSPECT she is the one that tell durai to back off from the suing case in case much more unintended information is leaked. she also proves my point by resignin' albeit givin' reasons like the govt wanted nkf to change its whole board of directors and stuff. but i definitely think there is more to it than it seems. hmm.

sch's getting pretty interestin now tt every teacher is picking on me esp after my bio marks. hai. but chew and koh are nice ppl. and my stupid classmates are great at spreadin' rumours. lol. they are my good friends la, i remove the stupid. shit i hate debates.i cant think of wad to say on the spot. tt's why i suck at arguing with ppl. like tt also good. make lesser enemies. i cant comprehend why im nt in the least worried abt the upcoming prelims as in im nt even to the pt of being stressed. i hope smthg happens real quick tt will really jolt me from dreamland.

time for me to enter my fantasy world. of warcraft. nite frends. today has been a day of surprises and sadness. nitee.

moussie

moussie

moussie is who i am.

those who makes mischief in the earth, theirs is the curse.

those who makes mischief in the earth, theirs is the curse.

was it just a mere concidence? less than 24 hrs ever since london won the rights to host the 2012 olympics, it has been hit by 4 separate blasts tt killed at least 33 ppl. but the g8 summit which was led by blair was held in scotland. some 720km away from the heart of the blasts. as much as i detest this act of terrorism, it would serve as an awakening call to the european countries tt the barbaric terrorists are still out there. the war on terrorism is still on and those crazy alqaeda f***ers would nt hesitate to harm innocent civilians albeit knowin' well tt they're going against their religion by doing so. i seriously dun know wad benefits cld be reaped from such atks. those brainless gits. they call the mujahedeen, a blessed military operation and that they burned fear and terror in britain. instead i guess every1 is now even more united. extremists need to know tt their determination to cause death and destruction to innocent ppl in a desire to impose extremism to the world is weaker than the americans' determination to defend their values and way of life. in the end, be it the 911 atks or the many bombings round the world, they'd nvr succeed in destroyin' wht Americans hold dear in their country and in other civilised nations throughout the world.

i still dun understand y saddam is nt yet prosecuted for his actions. yet he is enjoyin' himself in prison. eating good food and indulge in the many luxuries tt many prisoners dun get. he is considered both a murderer and a rapist. yet bush still dun want to kill him. then wad's the point of capturing him. the Iraqis want to see some justice be done. he had made them suffer enough and ought to be killed.no i tink he deserved much more. he shld be crucified and fed to the wolves. while in remand, mouldy bread tog with pee shld be served to him. tt cb still believes tt he is a dictator and wld be granted freedom. luckily for him, i am not the warden. if nt he would be so f***ing dead.

hai admist the confusion in the real world, there's still school tmr. cant believe im actually lking forward to it. ;D

ioc.

ioc.

im still in a freakin holiday mood. i still havent awoke. i had ppl naggin' at me, knocking sense into me. but i guess it all depends on me now. went home extremely early today. ard 1pm. i was tuning in to channelnewsasia the whole afternoon watching the various cities presenting their bids so as to win the rights host olympics 2012. brought back memories of pw. i rmb standing like a fool reading from a script while trying to entertain the audience. i did managed to win over some short-lived amusements like sebastian cole who was leading the london bid. yupp. london won the bid. i thought their presentation was more than perfect. they were emphasing on the welfare of the athletes and abt leaving a legacy back there after the games. i was disappointed as i was rootin' for madrid. its such a beautiful country. bringin' the games to london is a bore. at least it shld have given paris a chance. she on the other hand was unsuccessful in biddin 3 times in a row. 4 votes. they lost by 4 votes.

is 7 weeks enough?
hai. there's still much yr 2 stuff to catch up. hmm. my seniors were right. 2 yrs in college did seem like a short time. but at least i made many wonderful friends. hai, looking back i would indeed only afford a weak smile. i had so many chances but i spoil them all. but life has to go on be it with regrets or nt. ive always wanted to study medicine. but 4 As or good social and lifeskills isnt gonna get me far. every single scholarship requires an outstanding cca record. and wad do i have to offer to stand out from the rest of the applicants? so i guess i'd either further my econs and get into entrepreneurship or i dun mind working in a bank, handling money. at least it's be a stable office job before i get into smthg more serious. the gaming industry is also temptin. but the prospects arent tt good yet. it may improve in the future. heh. i also want to try working as a zookeeper, fireman and a reporter. so i guess i'd change jobs every 5 years or so. after i had earn enough money, i'd migrate tog with my whole family to the the swiss maybe and enjoy life. yupp. enjoy life.

i still havent figure out my love life & i tink i never will. im always so talkative in front of my friends but i cant really look into the eyes or even engage a sensible long enough conversation with the girl of my dreams. bleah. oh ya. i got my first A in the 2 yrs i spent in vj. haha. it was no easy feat for me but i did it at the expense of 3 Fs. lol. it just feels good. okie i shall gloat over this and treat myself to a little warcraft. nitee.

feel good inc. gorillaz.