Busy and broke.
It's the season where all the training starts to kick in again...tampines just started a rotational swimming system which sees me heading there at least once a week to visit my old coach...sheares swim have the audacity to start training so early, eating away my precious tues and sat, when ihg is so darn far away and of cos my mainstream bi training which leaves me zombified after the ardous sets on mons, weds and fris. My life is so happening...u peeps out there must be envious like shit...rite? Rite...........................
'Sunning' my clothes only to discover mizwen and sook may sitting on a bed on level 3 peering into the nite sky.
"What the hell r u guys doing?"
"Looking at the moon." These gers have too much free time.
Rewind. Mon was ibg captain's treat. Food was not bad. Best was the chicken. Erm...and the lemonade...haha...oh yar...of cos the cake which was...ahem...bought. But wadeva lar, its free stuff.
The peeps went out last nite to revive their childhood memories of carrying paper lanterns...call it reliving, call it deprivation...wadeva...
Sigh...could haf made the trip if it wasn't for kg's 'effective and persistent' attempts in waking me up...i STILL laid concussed on my bed, oblivious to his presence...sigh...the aftermath of training...
I'm pretty much a churchmouse now, having splurged on like 4 gifts this month and more coming next month. My twin sisters are turning 21. Notice twins. Twins = 2. 2 = twins. U get what i mean. :( .... I nid to start going ard skool to pick empty cans now.
Someone just turned 21 today. Wish her the best in everything she does.
Wednesday, September 29, 2004
Friday, September 24, 2004
Goodness Gracious Great Balls of Fire!
Just caught top gun in eddy's room with aaron san, kenny and eddy himself...tt old show still rocks...its like one of those damn neat action flicks, not holding back all the cool moves a tomcat and MIG can make...read it somewhere tt some of the scenes in JAG was taken off the shelf from the extra takes in the movie...now, how kewl is tt?
Mid term hols are finally over...How i miss those lectures and tutorials...can't wait to work my ass off again...did so little thru out these break but wad the hell...its a break rite?
dun care... mid term = exams are coming = christmas is gona be here soon. K, no connection but still...was kind of missing christmas last nite...yes...i was entertaining myself in my room with some carols...irritatingly nice carols by the chipmunkies. Christmas...sigh...
-interupted-
Invitation to a pancake making session by our block dudette miss charmaine...we had some fun while serving our guest, miss summer who was pigging out even after dinner...sigh...these simple things in life, the break from the monotony of studying and training...i nid to make more pancakes in future...
K, back to my governance essay which is driving me nuts...3 days and 300 words...one can't ask for a MORE wonderful progress...
Mid term hols are finally over...How i miss those lectures and tutorials...can't wait to work my ass off again...did so little thru out these break but wad the hell...its a break rite?
dun care... mid term = exams are coming = christmas is gona be here soon. K, no connection but still...was kind of missing christmas last nite...yes...i was entertaining myself in my room with some carols...irritatingly nice carols by the chipmunkies. Christmas...sigh...
-interupted-
Invitation to a pancake making session by our block dudette miss charmaine...we had some fun while serving our guest, miss summer who was pigging out even after dinner...sigh...these simple things in life, the break from the monotony of studying and training...i nid to make more pancakes in future...
K, back to my governance essay which is driving me nuts...3 days and 300 words...one can't ask for a MORE wonderful progress...
Tuesday, September 21, 2004
the rain inside us
urban rain, fill the space with your splendour
the wait has been long, and i pray
that this rain would be the last time
you shift time with each throb
that echoes through my head
i can take no more than i already have
be gentle, dear rain, be gentle with me
the wait has been long, and i pray
that this rain would be the last time
you shift time with each throb
that echoes through my head
i can take no more than i already have
be gentle, dear rain, be gentle with me
...rain on a tues afternn
wkend escapades
Spent the wkend with my biathlon team on sunny sentosa...and a biathlon camp isn't gona run away from the sops...yeah..we had our crazy training, beach volleyball (tho we all pretty much sucked big time at it), dinner at the newly opened sakae sushi branch at siloso (and someone act ordered cold sakae) and last but not least, our indispensible drinking sessions till the wee hours in the morning...
Weather wasn't on our side...started raining mao and gou but that din dampen our spirits..we pitted stamina vs stamina (notice no skills involved) in a game of beach soccer before someone was crazy enuff to suggest swimming in the choppy waters of the sea...in the rain. We rounded off the day with a dinner at the new sakae sushi at siloso...then moved on to chill in our sijori hotel rooms...watched the chinese martial arts flick (sky dragon 8 steps) and being all hot bloodied males and females (wadeva), killed time by oggling at the female actresses starring in it...
The night went on with us abusing ourselves with alcohol whilst we entertain ourselves with games coupled with funny antics…u haf no idea wad ppl do in their drunken stupor… lots of weird and gross scenarios and the best thing, all caught on tape for the rest of the team and future generations to savour. Of course the freshies were the 1st ones to turn delirious and start spouting nonsense, followed by the seniors…until we were a tired heap on the floor…with tissue, chips, plastic cups, poker cards and liquor bottles. The whole place just looked like a gambling den. I still vaguely remember someone suggesting a 5km run in the morning…those narcissistic idiots…
Of cos the gathering turned out to be somewhat more fruitful for others...congrats to our dear maybeline and aaron! (dun want to comment further…literally a very touchy issue…hahaha)…
I woke up on a mon morning to stone at some stupid cartoon on the network with wei keong…before freshening up to join my hall folks at dragon inn restaurant for tim sum lunch...
Turnout was pretty good, almost filled up 4 tables…wad can I say about acers…we’re a bunch of pigs. It’s almost impossible to have a successful outdoor trip but if one can never go wrong with a gathering involving food…we’re just pigs......period.
It’s like 4am in the morning now. Just had a very satisfying supper consisting of instant udon and EGGS (such rarity nowadays) courtesy of veron…I owe her too much…
Better get back to my work. Have a time trial for sheares swim tmro at src at 9 am and I think I’m prolly gona crap up some stupid excuse to skip it. Paying HSS a visit tmro for some loans and meeting shawn, mich and pris for a show later…my mid term break is so bloody exciting.
Scary, I thought I just saw something black flew past my room in the corner of my eye…it must be the time of the night again...
Nid to join the Ministry of Muggers soon…somehow or rather i just can't seem to make the cut…
Weather wasn't on our side...started raining mao and gou but that din dampen our spirits..we pitted stamina vs stamina (notice no skills involved) in a game of beach soccer before someone was crazy enuff to suggest swimming in the choppy waters of the sea...in the rain. We rounded off the day with a dinner at the new sakae sushi at siloso...then moved on to chill in our sijori hotel rooms...watched the chinese martial arts flick (sky dragon 8 steps) and being all hot bloodied males and females (wadeva), killed time by oggling at the female actresses starring in it...
The night went on with us abusing ourselves with alcohol whilst we entertain ourselves with games coupled with funny antics…u haf no idea wad ppl do in their drunken stupor… lots of weird and gross scenarios and the best thing, all caught on tape for the rest of the team and future generations to savour. Of course the freshies were the 1st ones to turn delirious and start spouting nonsense, followed by the seniors…until we were a tired heap on the floor…with tissue, chips, plastic cups, poker cards and liquor bottles. The whole place just looked like a gambling den. I still vaguely remember someone suggesting a 5km run in the morning…those narcissistic idiots…
Of cos the gathering turned out to be somewhat more fruitful for others...congrats to our dear maybeline and aaron! (dun want to comment further…literally a very touchy issue…hahaha)…
I woke up on a mon morning to stone at some stupid cartoon on the network with wei keong…before freshening up to join my hall folks at dragon inn restaurant for tim sum lunch...
Turnout was pretty good, almost filled up 4 tables…wad can I say about acers…we’re a bunch of pigs. It’s almost impossible to have a successful outdoor trip but if one can never go wrong with a gathering involving food…we’re just pigs......period.
It’s like 4am in the morning now. Just had a very satisfying supper consisting of instant udon and EGGS (such rarity nowadays) courtesy of veron…I owe her too much…
Better get back to my work. Have a time trial for sheares swim tmro at src at 9 am and I think I’m prolly gona crap up some stupid excuse to skip it. Paying HSS a visit tmro for some loans and meeting shawn, mich and pris for a show later…my mid term break is so bloody exciting.
Scary, I thought I just saw something black flew past my room in the corner of my eye…it must be the time of the night again...
Nid to join the Ministry of Muggers soon…somehow or rather i just can't seem to make the cut…
Friday, September 17, 2004
anyway, wadeva.
and in the darkness,
in the midst of the madness,
i bow before you and call out to you.
i let myself loose, before you.
wildly i go, in spectacular twirls.
again and again.
the world turns its eyes again,
and i am left here waiting.
none of you have seen me before, no, not one.
for among the shadows i stand,
gently waiting, slowly forgetting, remembering.
alone, left alone.
just so i can support all of you, forgetting myself.
forgetting myself.
in the midst of the madness,
i bow before you and call out to you.
i let myself loose, before you.
wildly i go, in spectacular twirls.
again and again.
the world turns its eyes again,
and i am left here waiting.
none of you have seen me before, no, not one.
for among the shadows i stand,
gently waiting, slowly forgetting, remembering.
alone, left alone.
just so i can support all of you, forgetting myself.
forgetting myself.
sad eyes
Life sucks. How was I to know that things will turn out this way? I’ve done so much thinking, only to have all those questions thrown back at me when we talked.
Feels like a terrible knot tied in the heart. It’s suffocating the both of us.
The words exchanged spoke volumes…frank and rational…not exactly the hallmarks of anything i had hoped for.
Thought i lost a part of me a long time ago, only to realize I lost another part tonight…where did this other part come frm? God damnit…I’m hurting so many ppl out there and I never intended to… seriously…I dun feel like doing anything anymore…
I nid to train…fatigue is the key to shut down my system… I can’t rest that foot for long...the pain seems to travel up my spine and infects and clouds my brain with useless matter.
I nid sleep. Fuck everything else.
Feels like a terrible knot tied in the heart. It’s suffocating the both of us.
The words exchanged spoke volumes…frank and rational…not exactly the hallmarks of anything i had hoped for.
Thought i lost a part of me a long time ago, only to realize I lost another part tonight…where did this other part come frm? God damnit…I’m hurting so many ppl out there and I never intended to… seriously…I dun feel like doing anything anymore…
I nid to train…fatigue is the key to shut down my system… I can’t rest that foot for long...the pain seems to travel up my spine and infects and clouds my brain with useless matter.
I nid sleep. Fuck everything else.
Monday, September 13, 2004
bittersweet
The feelings of yesteryears are so hard to digest...so bittersweet...so innocent...
Halted work to be with myself for a moment...not that the song is exactly how I feel...but it prolly was...sometime back...sigh
This Ain't A Love Song ( Bon Jovi )
Should have seen it coming when roses died
Should have seen the end of summer in your eyes
I should have listened when you said good night
You really meant good bye
Baby, ain't it funny, how you never ever learn to fall
You're really on your knees, when you think you're standing tall
But only fools are "know-it-alls" and i played that fool for you
I cried and i cried
There were nights that died for you baby
I tried and i tried to deny that your love drove me crazy, baby
If the love that i got for you is gone
If the river i cried ain't that long
Then i'm wrong, yeah i'm wrong, this ain't a love song
Baby, i thought you and me would stand the test of time
Like we got away with the perfect crime but
We were just a legend in my mind
I guess that i was blind
Remember those nights dancing at the masquerade
The clowns wore smiles that wouldn't fade
You and i were the renegades, some things never change
It made me so mad 'cause i wanted it bad for us baby
Now it's so sad that whatever we had, ain't worth saving
If the pain that i'm feeling so strong
Is the reason that i'm holding on
Then i'm wrong, yeah i'm wrong - this ain't a love song
Listening to the song and feeling it. I love rock ballads...they're just so amazingly depressing. I dun understand who can live w/o them.
Halted work to be with myself for a moment...not that the song is exactly how I feel...but it prolly was...sometime back...sigh
This Ain't A Love Song ( Bon Jovi )
Should have seen it coming when roses died
Should have seen the end of summer in your eyes
I should have listened when you said good night
You really meant good bye
Baby, ain't it funny, how you never ever learn to fall
You're really on your knees, when you think you're standing tall
But only fools are "know-it-alls" and i played that fool for you
I cried and i cried
There were nights that died for you baby
I tried and i tried to deny that your love drove me crazy, baby
If the love that i got for you is gone
If the river i cried ain't that long
Then i'm wrong, yeah i'm wrong, this ain't a love song
Baby, i thought you and me would stand the test of time
Like we got away with the perfect crime but
We were just a legend in my mind
I guess that i was blind
Remember those nights dancing at the masquerade
The clowns wore smiles that wouldn't fade
You and i were the renegades, some things never change
It made me so mad 'cause i wanted it bad for us baby
Now it's so sad that whatever we had, ain't worth saving
If the pain that i'm feeling so strong
Is the reason that i'm holding on
Then i'm wrong, yeah i'm wrong - this ain't a love song
Listening to the song and feeling it. I love rock ballads...they're just so amazingly depressing. I dun understand who can live w/o them.
Sunday, September 12, 2004
sunday blues
As u can see, i'm not exactly enthusiastic abt blogging...it's been 2 days since i posted anything..........wadeva...
Sunday is almost over and i simply can't wait for the next week to begin...SO MUCH to look forward to...accumulating readings, unfinished tutorials, soon-to-be due assignments, tt bloody debate...the IF3210 administrators really have no sympathy for the students taking the module...25 pg research thesis outline and a 5 pg debate outline to be submitted within a week...who do they think we are....erm....Manuel Castells?...tt freaking crappy icm-atic guru...
For peeps out there who are even interested to noe, i'm taking this info and comm mgmt course (aka icm) in nus...appealed to me bcos of the IT stuff and projects...but the downside is that i gotta tolerate all the nonsense from the academics in the field...they just love to glamourise their ideas and put it across to ppl in a foreign language...y can they just put it across in simple english? and the most amusing thing is that they love to criticise one another...(like this Habermas guy is the champion...wrote one book and a 2nd one to critique his previous work...i mean wad the fish)
Bowling at chervons with the gang would have been fun..but i have my Habermas reading to complete...promised myself to finish it last nite but being a procrastinator myself (like many of u out there)...u dun nid me to explain wad happened...(ok mb something...I actually spent the whole afternn trying to get the bloody string into my bolster case...but to no avail...sad man)...sigh...but feeling slightly better after catching the 'yi tian tu long ji' show on channel 8 with good ol gerald in the lounge...:p
-interuppted-
And then who else to appear but miss veron who is nice enuff to help me with my bolster strings now...I'm so blessed...and feeling alot happier...one bolster down...back to my research...
sian...its gona be a long nite...
Saturday, September 11, 2004
wad the fish
K...let me explain...i have absolutely no intention to blog...the only reason y i'm here is bcos i wanted to post a comment on dear Prissy's blog and she 'kindly' only allowed peeps who have registered to make a din abt her life...
I never imagined myself doing this kind of shit. I have always stereotyped blogging was for wussies who have nothing else better to do in their free time (forgive me...my male blogging counterparts) but what the hell...since I'm doing something related..i guess it'll be an idea to indulge in this kind of girly stuff once in a while...sigh...i still can't believe i'm doing this...
K..enuff of my nonsense...i reckon since i decided to pen all the shit in my life down...i might as well do it properly then...
Maybe i can start with an intro abt myself...hmmm....I'm cynical by nature altho i'm trying to change that aspect bit by bit (ppl tell me its not healthy). Life seems to be improving and i'm cheering up gradually...prolly a slightly different person compared to last sem (and distinctly different from the me i know years ago)...happier definitely and more focused...the occasional spasms have gone down a great deal as well...got my relentless trainings to drain the very essence out of me...and of course all my friends in hall creating a funny mess of my life...seriously, wad will i do w/o them? I just love all of them.
Another ger mentioned to me today that i'm a sadomasochist again...(of cos minus the portion on the sexual gratification)...meaning i love to inflict or submit myself to lots of physical abuse, unpleasant and trying experiences... i'll have to agree to some kind of extent on tt...Ain't physical pain a pleasure? I always like the feeling of being bruised...nice weird feeling wen u massage tt little black spot...k...i sound sick...
Enuff bullshit. I guess tt's it for a virgin post.
I never imagined myself doing this kind of shit. I have always stereotyped blogging was for wussies who have nothing else better to do in their free time (forgive me...my male blogging counterparts) but what the hell...since I'm doing something related..i guess it'll be an idea to indulge in this kind of girly stuff once in a while...sigh...i still can't believe i'm doing this...
K..enuff of my nonsense...i reckon since i decided to pen all the shit in my life down...i might as well do it properly then...
Maybe i can start with an intro abt myself...hmmm....I'm cynical by nature altho i'm trying to change that aspect bit by bit (ppl tell me its not healthy). Life seems to be improving and i'm cheering up gradually...prolly a slightly different person compared to last sem (and distinctly different from the me i know years ago)...happier definitely and more focused...the occasional spasms have gone down a great deal as well...got my relentless trainings to drain the very essence out of me...and of course all my friends in hall creating a funny mess of my life...seriously, wad will i do w/o them? I just love all of them.
Another ger mentioned to me today that i'm a sadomasochist again...(of cos minus the portion on the sexual gratification)...meaning i love to inflict or submit myself to lots of physical abuse, unpleasant and trying experiences... i'll have to agree to some kind of extent on tt...Ain't physical pain a pleasure? I always like the feeling of being bruised...nice weird feeling wen u massage tt little black spot...k...i sound sick...
Enuff bullshit. I guess tt's it for a virgin post.
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