I told you so

Remember when I said I could never be a gay Mormon West Virginian?  Well, here's the proof.





Now, I love Lady Gaga.  I also love Country Roads.  In fact it is one of the few songs that can consistently bring tears to my eyes (that and Love at Home)  But the country Born this Way simply does not work, for me.  And why do they say "country roads version", it's barely even county, much less anything close to Country Roads. 

Here are the unadulterated versions of each song below, if you were able to bear through the above version and now need your ears cleaned.  

Spring

I hate spring.

Autumn is my favorite season with the color of the leaves and everything falling back into routine.

I love the beauty of white winter snow and the feeling of "snow days"- no work for me!

Summer is great, I can bake in the sun.

But spring? What good is it? The snow is gone, it's still cold. It's windy, rainy and muddy and you have to go back outside and work. It is the season of "change". I hate change; I just want to get to summer. Spring is the longest season ever.



Am I on my own here too? Any other "spring haters" out there?

Coming Out?

The official list of Unapproved Activities in the new church handbook of instructions includes coming out parties. Darn.

What is up.

2010 didn't end up all that bad. I could think of a lot worse things that could have happened. Of course, my mind thinks up some real crazy stuff sometimes.
I completed my first 1/2 Marathon. It was a good day, good time, good run. I kept up with my little (younger) brother, he is -10 years from me, and has more time to devote to fitness so I'm pretty glad about that. It was also a good time to bond a bit.
I had my first trip to NYC. I was convinced that this WV born man would not stand for city life. I was so wrong. I absolutely loved every minute. I could see myself living there easily. I took my wife to celebrate her birthday. We stayed at her openly gay uncle's apartment in Manhattan, one block from Central Park. We enjoyed a Broadway show, dinner with her Uncle and his partner at a fancy resturant and saw all the sights. It was so much fun. We can't wait to go back.
I also had the opportunity to have a friend visit me for lunch one day. I never imagined that I would be meeting him. . It was one of the best days in memory. Words fail to communicate how I felt. To talk to someone in person who has an inkling of what I am feeling was a singular experience that I can only dream will be repeated. After he left, Luke 24:32 came to mind. Thank you for your time, Mark.
Today I do not have such feelings. My wife goes in for a life changing surgery this week. I am scared. I am scared not only about how the surgery will go, but what life will be like afterward. Will she be happier? Will I be happier? How different will our life, marriage and family be? I had the opportunity to give her a blessing with the help of our bishop yesterday. I was prompted to express my love and for her and for her not to worry. I don't know why I still don't feel at ease. I have faith in God overall, I just hope I can still do my part. Thoughts and prayers this week are much appreciated.

Let's GO---------MOUNTAINEERS

    

  Even though last weekend was General Conference (which I really enjoyed,  btw)  this weekend is Stake Conference, which I was looking forward to.  I would actually be able to go to the Priesthood Leadership training to get a better idea of how to fulfill my current calling. But alas, I have chosen to go to a football game.  No, I don't like football, yes I am trying to be manly and forge a relationship with my dad.  I would rather go to Stake Conference, but this is the only weekend it would work for him.  I haven't actually talked to my dad about going, I never talk to my dad, but my mom did just call to say that I should be honored that he is missing the first day of squirrel season to go to the game with us.

Over and Gone

The crickets at night remind us that summer is over and gone, over and gone.  I'd like to say it wasn't the worst summer ever, but I don't know it that is true. 

Today marks the day when the Campbell's go back to work.  We had our typical beach time, theme park time, fair time, pool time.  We had weddings and funerals. As always life goes on.

It was on the very first day of summer break that it all came out.  At one point I saw myself posting 2-3 times a week, trying to get to the bottom of all this.  That was pushed aside in an effort to focus more on the here and now.  My wife and I did talk with the Bishop, once.  He said he would find an LDS therapist, he didn't.  I said, you are really going to need to follow up with us.  He hasn't.  Maybe he knows we are ok enough to not need any of his time.  That being said, I do not have a problem with him.  He was the perfect person for me to talk to, with his experience with his own son. 

We did manage to find an LDS therapist on our own.  More exactly, my wife did.  The therapist ignored us when we first showed up at the closest stake center she worked from, a 90 minute drive.  Apparently there was a communication problem with the scheduling department.  Very frustrating.  The second appointment ended with her trying to encourage us to come at an early time, she didn't like having a 7pm appointment.  We had already explained that with the kids and the long drive we couldn't get a sitter to come any earlier to get there sooner.  When my wife called back to set up our next appointment, she was told that the therapist was not taking 7pm appointments.  The end.  Not that the sessions were that bad, but, I can read the Ensign on my own, and pretty much all we got were SMA's.  After $200 and gas, I think going to the temple will be much better therapy and time better spent. 

Which, we did manage to get to the temple twice. The first time was pretty rough, the second time, seemed back to normal. 

So here we are, blessed to have had a summer off to regroup, probably could have made a little more of it, but now, going back into the job and the stress that comes with work, the real test begins.

Well....

Is it too much to say I still believe?  The way this whole thing came down has strengthened my faith more than anything.  God is always watching out for me. For us.  There are too many little details that He worked out to make this the right time to come out, that I cannot share them all.  I will give you a little time line, however:

First, what you did not know is that I came out to a ward member about a month ago.  He is 19 and not on a mission, and I was prompted to talk to him.  He is also the Bishop's son.  Last Monday I decided to add a new moho friend to facebook and begin chatting.  My wife gets on my laptop at home to check something on facebook that I had not shared with her.  I had never done this before.  Wife sees my chat.  I arrive home after the kids went away with her BFF.  There is some discussion, followed by a night and a day of hell.  Wednesday comes around and as I had no one to talk to, I had called Bishop's son, who promptly (and rightly told his dad of our problem)  Bishop called me, we all agree to meet.  It went very well.  On Thursday, there just happened to be a meeting in the region on SGA.  My wife and I attended with about 6 other guys, including Bishop's son and mom.  So, now she knows too and my wife can have someone else to relate to.  Who knew?  God is great. 

So, basically more people know, and I am less "on my own" than I ever imagined I would be after starting this blog a relatively short time ago.  I am certainly not coming out to the world, but strangely, I am not as bothered or worried now that it has happened.  I love my wife, I am not going anywhere, and because she loves me more than I deserve, we are going to make it. 

As a side note, for Father's Day my wife got me the sheet music books to Les Mis and Wicked.  Have you noticed how I love that music?  My wife ROCKS!