#random

1. 心境如此异常地平静…平静得…我都不敢相信。



2. 再撑一撑十一日就能暂时解脱……脱离日夜写作的“苦海”。哈哈哈哈



3. 再多十四日，就能去透透气了！



4. 虽然恨不得这十一日赶紧圆满结束，心中却不舍在这儿的时光如此飞逝而过。今天是五月的最后一天了……就差那二十分钟就是六月了……



5. 身心灵的成长…什么都无法换取。

~ whatever happens, happens for a reason. =)

My soul is crying for some good novels.

T_T


I welcome a good novel, anytime.



(crunching academic / non-fiction is just not my thing.. I am trying hard though! hahah)

~ whatever happens, happens for a reason. =)

#blessed

What is your word?

#blessed



I am so grateful for the friends made here. So much fun and laughter.. (and auntified moments -_-") sharing new food and adventures.. and I love their sharing.. of things that your direct colleagues won't be able to share with you.. and you learn so much from them. Their experiences, their stories, their peeves, and sharing of "YAH, me too!"-kyoshi-moments. hahaha. We are from the same occupation through and through, no doubt about that. =P

I hope we keep in close touch after we are thrown back into reality.

It's amazing how first impressions can change so much, after you get to know them better. :)

#lovingthismoment(s) #cherish #blessed

~ whatever happens, happens for a reason. =)

ahma :)

Really miss my ahma and I gave her a call this morning.

Would it be weird if I call her again tomorrow?? hahhaha. cos I seldom do that -- continuously calling her.

Though back in hometown, during holidays / early days off (means marking days!), I will buy her lunch.. haha. She's not used to grandchildren doing that, so she will meekly say "thank you" when it's time for me to leave. hahahah. So cute. :))))

So reassuring to just hear her voice over the phone. You know she's there, and she knows you're here, and you know she cares for you no matter what happens. :) Even though we talk about the usual mundane stuff, but it's what her heart and thoughts convey that matters. :)


#blessed #cherish

~ whatever happens, happens for a reason. =)

#gratitude

感恩这两天天气不错（大约15~16°），让我能够坐在书桌前打字！
用不着包裹地像粽子一般窝在床上——即没坐姿（苦了我的颈项、背、臀部和一直盘着的大腿，且又承受着几公斤重的手提电脑），也没环境啊（打字多么不方便）。
I CAN DO IT! Unblock the mental block and writer's block!

~ whatever happens, happens for a reason. =)

Finding lost momentum.

Somehow getting started on the new round of assignments is getting harder.

WHERE DID MY MOTIVATION AND DRIVE GO TO?

Finding back the momentum in researching, reading and writing right now..

Somehow, the task seemed alright.. rationally, I know it is doable. Yet, at the same time, I think I am scarred from the previous scare, that I am not progressing. Then this fear keeps me from advancing.

I kept backtracking to that "disappointment". I realised I didn't have much a reaction when I first saw the bad grade (it was 1.46am then after working on an assignment), but deep down I know, this is my form of coping mechanism -- keeping calm and cool when my inner state is bungee jumping right into the abyss. It's not very healthy. But that's how I had changed since that day in the P6 class. It's weird how some things scarred you when you realised on hindsight. I've been very much alone.. I don't have anyone whom I can share these sadness with.. and I just cope with it and grow up.
[Like sometimes people always say I look calm and patient -- hey, thanks for affirming my exterior demeanour looks cool cos I've got an image to keep, but oh, I am dying right inside. Who knows that?]

I know it's a mental barrier that I need to get through.. it's been a week.. and a week's time is costly in terms of meeting deadlines. So PLEASE. I hope the feedback on my grade come soon so that it can put my heart at ease. If I don't get past this mental barrier, I don't want to wait more lifetimes to do that. It's something that I got to do it this time, so next time I will learn something else to progress.

I CAN DO IT.

~ whatever happens, happens for a reason. =)

流年

有生之年　狭路相逢　终不能幸免
手心忽然长出　纠缠的曲线
懂事之前　情动以后　长不过一天
留不住　算不出　流年
（哪一年 让一生 改变）

我的最爱虽然是黄伟文，但是另外一个伟文（林夕）也不赖。
这首我特别喜爱的歌词…
对我而言，林夕的特点就是无法忘怀的经典，唯美的意境，黄伟文的特点就是传递恒长的经典。
方文山也不赖，他的特点就是从歌词中勾勒出一幅壮观的画面，超脱意境，尽收眼帘，让你沉浸在那氛围、意境当中……


这歌词我一向来就特别喜爱……如今，更为贴切。就连月份、时间的比喻都吻合……

~ whatever happens, happens for a reason. =)

distractions.

Okay.
What is happening lately?
Is it cos I 'complained' I was too bored so life decided to give me some distraction when all I wanted was to concentrate now? zzz -_-""

I was trying to finish two assignments for these few days.. and here are the distractions
- outings
- impromptu gathering (I rarely do that)
- planning for travel (I hate to do that when I am really busy.. but man, gotta firm up plans since I am following other people.. shan't keep people waiting)
- family kept calling me on the holiday (not that it's a bad thing) but... yeah. I was rushing work.
- firming some plans for family (even when I am all out here in this place, hahha) -- technology is sometimes a boon and bane! 
- and now.. a course friend just called to share about her assignment that's due tomorrow (hahah eh. I'm speechless). yeah but I guess she was worried about the similarity report. But please note, she called at 11.20pm.. late or not? hahahah
- oh. And I had engaged in the most phonecalls in the past week, ever since I am here. hahha! Mon, Tue, Wed, Fri... wow. 

As I have always warned myself, be careful for what you wished for.. because you might just get them. =P
haha.

~ whatever happens, happens for a reason. =)

#blessed

This is so true.

On D-day, my dajie accompanied for more than an hour miles away. :) She also 為我打抱不平. Haha. Yeah but I knew what I was doing rationally. On D-5, we were on the phone for more than two hours despite her sore throat. :)

On D-day, had a great impromptu hotpot outing with fellow mates. It was just fun.. or rather the closeness we felt when we're with people from our homeland. :)

Oh and it was drizzling on the entire 15-20min way walking home.. which is so rare here cos you get less than 10s of rain -- but that made me happy cos I love walking in drizzles and looking at rain #crazy And what's even more so-much-win moment was that I was appropriately dressed with a waterproof down jacket (where usually I wear acotton jacket) that night. #somuchwin 

On D-day, I was (and still am) blessed cos everything worked out well.. things happened for a reason. :)

Today, my friend MY purposely made tamagoyaki and shared with me for dinner before lecture, and purposely waited for me to go home cos I was gonna ask the lecturer for feedback on my badly done assignment (usually we just go our own ways since we're from different tutorials). Even on the day she knew of my grade, she also 為我打抱不平 and kept encouraging me.

Thank you :)

Actions speak louder than words.

What is your word?
#blessed

~ whatever happens, happens for a reason. =)

Right answers.

"But you only give me the right answers.. All the right answers you gave me... I don't feel like they are my answers! But.. are those really the right answers? All the answers you gave me, are you sure those are all the right answers?" ~ Kim Minki (SCHOOL 2013 ep 12)


你给的“正确”答案，是他们要的答案吗？
文凭很重要，是不是他们要的答案？
自己身经体验的“答案”，就一定是无可否定的答案吗？


以前，人们总是说，读好书，读大学，未来找一份好工作。

每个人读书的目的都不一样。
从初院毕业后，选择就读的科系的理由分门别类。

有些人为了梦想理想来选择科系。
有些为了它的经济效益来选择科系。
有些因为无从选择而随同朋友来选择科系。
有些误打误撞来选择科系。
有些出于无奈毫无选择只要将就着来选择科系。
有些人因为单纯的兴趣来选择科系。
有些人因为家人的意愿来选择科系。
等等等



经济效益和美好未来这个“正确”答案，是不是你选择科系的标准呢？



兴趣是否养得活你？
预期的经济效益是否持久？
梦想有没有实现？
跟随别人的脚步是否可以走出自己的一条路来？
走投无路之余是不是能另辟蹊径？
出于无奈会不会反而开拓另一片视野？
误打误撞有没有惊喜？
履行‘诺言’的当下，快不快乐？




如今，回想当时的“答案”……是不是正确的呢？

~ whatever happens, happens for a reason. =)

Deja vu.

It's quite surreal that I had a few deja vu moments here in Melb.
In a flash it appeared, and disappeared once the wave hits you, and you are thrown back to 'reality'.

Once was at the Moomba Festival (March), where suddenly the scene in front of me, the big CANDY signboard just seemed so darn familiar and the rush and throng of people all at this festival.

Another was walking down the streets near my house or something.

And I just had another of those moments, while sitting on the bed under covers, LAPtop on LAP doing work, and the scene in front of me feels familiar. Although this is the third/fourth day that I had started working like this (cos it's just too darn cold to sit at the desk with the wind freezing your hands and feet).. the spatial arrangement suddenly seemed all too familiar. Thing is, I had made some changes to the spatial arrangement of some stuff in the room TODAY. For instance, the clothes weren't up yesterday were up, the bottle is in a certain place, my laptop on my lap was in a certain angle right now. And bam, that familiar feeling.

goshie.




Well.. I am sure I had karmic links with this place. That's for sure.




Anyway, back to deja vu..... 

People would usually ask at this juncture (reading too much Western fictional stuff / anime, haha), what second chances are you given to make right this time?

Are you sure you aren't reliving this whole life over and over again without realising you need to change some things?

If you are really given the chance to relive these moments, what are the things you would like to change?

Are you sure this 'reality' you are in is really the 'reality' reality?

Could you be in a parallel universe after that split second wave?? 

(Speaking of parallel universes... urgh.. I so wanna continue reading Kaku Michio's book that I left in hometown.... well. Not like I have time to.. but time to blog is there cos blogging is catharsis. hahahah.)

Are you, YOU?




hahaha. #想太多 #whenyouhaveyourthoughtstoentertainyourself

~ whatever happens, happens for a reason. =)

Markit!!

Today is D-1.
Looking forward to D-day to try those yummy pastries!
(I hope they are not too ex though.... T_T)
(and I hope the weather is nice! Predicted to be 13-14 degrees.. not any lower please!)

Nothing is gonna dampen my spirits. Forward go!
ひとりで. :)

じんせいはながいくない。

Update
Went too late. T_T
All cakes were sold out... 
Nevermind, at least one of the bakery is quite near.. shall visit it some time! :)))

D-day was good! Thank you everyone.. your presence made a difference. :)))))

~ whatever happens, happens for a reason. =)

Got to live.

Kind of realized I've been "living" my life through social media lately.. that's bad.

Got to get a life.
Got to experience things in life.

That's what happening when you're always cooped in four walls doing nothing but reading and writing (and cooking). Your mind tends to go wild and wander... is this madness? Haha. It's all in the mind, mind you.

Can't wait for this stint to be over.

And hope next semester will be kinder to me!

走，溜達溜達去！

連買菜也變成一種樂趣，天理何在？😂

~ whatever happens, happens for a reason. =)

历史重演？

累世累劫如此辗转，相聚碰头，是不是历史又再重演？
一再地执迷不悟？一再地随着习惯前进？一再地难分取舍？
会不会更好，就得看当下的抉择。

业，会看见。

~ whatever happens, happens for a reason. =)