It took me 2 days before I finally got down to blogging this post but even now I still don't feel quite so ready. All the same I shall try. Because I've promised God, and it's never good to put off a promise made with God.

YES!! I've gotten the freaking SEVEN points I keep telling the whole world I'm going to get!
It's God's Promise fulfilled :D

You've seen the whole process. More or less, as much as I have shown on my blog. When God first dared me to believe, I blogged. When I was afraid, I blogged. When he gave me peace, I blogged. It's all in the blog. It would have been quite embarrassing I suppose if I hadn't gotten the 7 points. Because that would have made everything I've written utter crap. But by the face that I DID get the seven point, it goes to show that NO, I AM NOT TALKING CRAP.

NO, I wasn't imagining it when I felt like God was daring me to believe that I could get seven points. NO, I wasn't joking when I told you with a smile that I'm going to get 7 points and go to VJ. THIS IS GOD AT WORK RIGHT BEFORE YOUR VERY EYES. This is God at work in someone you know (ME) so that you can see that this is not just some nice sounding story told by a fren's fren's fren so that you would be deluded into believing that God exist but this is a REAL story.

Judging by how I normally fare among my peers and how they have fared this time round, I should be getting ard 10 points. But NO. I got SEVEN. And here's the more important if not the most important part of the whole matter. Yea, I got seven, AND IT'S ALL THANKS TO GOD!!

Stop deluding yourself that it's because I am lucky and you're some poor ill-luck person who can never do as well as all the people you want to be like in life. Oops, does that sound too harsh? I'm just so irritated that what seems to be sticking out like a sore thumb to me, other people can't see it! IT IS GOD I TELL YOU! GOD!!!!! NOT LUCK!!!

You've watched the whole process! Assuming you've been following my blog posts. I wonder how many people actually do that. Hmm, Anyway, you've watched the whole process. You've read the claims I've made in various post. I said I'll keep going to church and secell (which you may have thought a waste of time) and though I'm not that smart (if smartness can even been measured by a stupid paper) I'll get SEVEN POINTS! And then when people ask how, I'll say, I DUNO. I just honor God, and he decided to honor my work (see it's not luck, in a sense I've worked for this just in a diff form - a better and more rewarding form) and somehow, things just work out in His amazing way.

Example, even though I got 7, I can't get into VJ. That's coz after CCA bonus points, i've a fiver which would have qualified me for last year but for this year you need a four to get in. BUT SEE. Because I'm here for first month, I get 2 loyalty points. Which makes me a 3 pointer! AND SEE. As I've explained before, the only reason I got in for first month was because of some surprising turn of events in which I got a phone call out of the blue. SEE! God works things out in His amazing way.

Another example. Before results were out, I started the debate between geog and chem yet again. I wanted to let my results show me what to take, but I figured there was a low chance of that happening since I was expecting the same grade for both. Chem and geog were suppose to get A1 and English was suppose to be a 2. BUT SEE. God is so smart. Although I didn't complete my compo (or rather wrote an ending that was suppose to be 2 paragraphs in 3 sentences), and although the letter format which came out was the one that I kept failing, somehow, I got a 1 for English so that chem could get 2 without affecting my L1R5 but at the same time tell me what subject combi i should take. God is so amazing!

SEE. God is super real. If you still don't believe, I don't know what to say. Actually I do, it's probably coz my english is not good enough to capture his essence and put it in words.

Anyway, YES I GOT SEVEN.
I'm not smart, it's called, SUPERNATURAL INTERVENTION.

Elizabeth chirped at 12:03 AM | No comments

My thoughts are in a mess right now. When I've sort my thoughts out, I'll type out the testimony I promised God to I'll type. But for now, this song is my best attempt.



When You Believe
Many nights we've prayed
With no proof anyone could hear
In our hearts a hopeful song
We barely understood

Now we are not afraid
Although we know there's much to fear
We were moving mountains long
Before we knew we could

There can be miracles, when you believe
Though hope is frail, it's hard to kill
Who knows what miracles you can achieve
When you believe, somehow you will
You will when you believe

In this time of fear
When prayers so often prove in vain
Hope seems like the summer birds
To swiftly flown away

Yet now I'm standing here
My heart's so full I can't explain
Seeking faith and speaking words
I never thought I'd say

There can be miracles, when you believe
Though hope is frail, it's hard to kill
Who knows what miracles you can achieve
When you believe, somehow you will
You will when you believe

A-shi-ra la-do-nai ki ga-oh ga-ah
I will sing to the Lord, for he has triumphed gloriously
A-shi-ra la-do-nai ki ga-oh ga-ah
I will sing to the Lord, for he has triumphed gloriously
Mi-cha-mo-cha ba-elim adonai
Who is like You, oh Lord, among the celestial
Mi-ka-mo-cha ne-dar- ba-ko-desh
Who is like You, majestic in holiness
Na-chi-tah v¡¯-chas-d¡¯-cha am zu ga-al-ta
In Your love, You lead the people You redeemed
Na-chi-tah v¡¯-chas-d¡¯-cha am zu ga-al-ta
In Your love, You lead the people You redeemed
A-shi-ra, a-shi-ra, a-shi-ra...
I will sing, I will sing, I will sing

Elizabeth chirped at 11:49 AM | No comments

It's D-Day.
So someone started freaking out about results yesterday causing the whole table of girls to freak out too. Yea, I was freaking out too. But then I started questioning myself. You know how as Christians we always have a standard different from the world's? The way we view things should be different. So if I'm doing what everyone is doing(freaking out), then does that signal something wrong?

Proper prayer always put things in perspective. It makes you see things the way God does instead of the way the world does.

It's natural to be nervous about our results. After all, it's the fruit of our months of labour and it'll be nice to know that you didn't labour for naught. So that's okay. Get excited, get nervous, get whatever you want. But I think the differentiation point between us and the world would be the significance of the result. Will we measure our intelligence by the result? Will we think we're that big if we score straight As?

My mom told me to pray this prayer:
"Lord, help me to accept the things I cannot change, but change the things I can.
Give me the wisdom to differentiate between the two.
And in everything I give thanks because I know you have a plan, you have a purpose, and you know and will give what's best for me. Amen."

As of now, I'm in state of calm. That will probably change when I enter the hall.
Last night as I fell asleep in God's arms, I felt a whisper/an echo of what he asked me a couple of months ago. "Do you dare to believe?"

And this is what the Os have been for me as I've proabably mentioned before. The period God got me to exercise my faith. I recalled the many times I've prayed and pleaded for His help, the conference prayers we had before each paper, the calmness I felt as I entered the exam hall. I would say that prep for Os was a pretty amazing period. Results are just well, to get you to the next chapter of your life. It does not, and will not, judge me in my walk with God which at the end of the day is what really matters.

Yes, so I can be happy, sad or even disappointed when I know my results. But that's that. That's all. It may change ppl's opinion of me, but it doesn't change who I am and how God sees me. And once again, that's what really matters.

I have confidence my results will be good. How good? I don't know. But good enough.
People think I can do it because I'm Elizabeth. (i still don't get that)
But for the 100x time, I shall say,
I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.

Elizabeth chirped at 10:26 AM | No comments

Results are coming out on thursday! X( How exciting.
I think the hardest part is not to deal with the results, but to deal with the many people/friends/relatives/uncles/aunties who are bound to ask you what you've got. Do badly and you'll have to put up with the sympathetic pats and what not. Do well and you'll face the "S**T YOU!" or give others the sympathetic pat. Bleah. All the same, I'm still looking forward to results day. In everything give thanks :)

Anyway, now that I've finally gotten orientation photos from my OGLs, I can finally photo-blog again! Snaps of VJ orientation!
-

Introduction

Orientation Theme: VICTORIAN KNIGHTS!
Basically, in the land of Victoria, the Queen old and is searching for the perfect successor to her throne. As such, she summoned 8 of the best knights in her land and challenged them to prove themselves worthy of the throne. From the North came the Rangers and from the South came the Riders.

The Rangers comprise of: Valour, Igore, Cyrus, Theodore
The Riders comprise of: Osiris, Ralphiel, Ivanhoe, Avalon
Together, the 8 knights form the word VICTORIA. haha.
As you can see I belong to Ralpiel :D
To facilitate the playing of games, our OG is further sub-divided into 8 different groups.

.. and this is my group, RAOUL!
---

Orientation Day 3: Wet games

What I learnt from this game: Guys have no idea how to shampoo long hair :/

Astro boy hairstyle :)

Everybody FREEZE!
Not. We're suppose to pass a plastic bag of water over our heads.

Classic game of sissors, paper, stone - SPLASH!
---

Mass Dance @ Suntec [Sat]
We gave our OGLs cups for being such fun and enthu leaders :D
They're the BOSS!

It's hard to tell, but that's the fountain of wealth behind us.
Btw, we're not sweaty. Just really wet because of the rain.
Yep, we mass danced in the rain! :)

Raoul + other people from Ralphiel.
We're doing the hand signal of our most commonly used cheer.
(over here, there's a hand signal for every single cheer so that even if you can't hear what the cheerleader is saying, you know what cheer to cheer. Good idea huh?)

We ended the lovely but super tiring night with STJ! Senior treat Junior :D
--

Sea Regatta @ East Coast
Tug-of-War!
The rope was really really long. That's just 3/4 of our opponent team. Anyway, we won! :D

That's me! I was desperately trying to remember what we were doing that led to such a pose.

Then I saw this. Haha.
It was the relay game, so I was trying to balance a ko-ko-crunch on my nose in the previous picture. *note: look at the common pose of our hands.haha*

Love the expression!
Well since the girls were the once who "suffered" during the shampoo game, this time the guys had to be the ones getting buried. A mistake I reckon, since it meant we had more surface area to cover :/

It's tiring to bury people in the sand!

TADA! Not very well done I suppose.
Not surprising why we lost this round.

We finished our stations early and had to wait for the next one.
So... the cam-whoring begun!

You know, it's really hard to attempt a jump shot while in the sea.

That's our Principal in the middle.
Since we couldn't dunk him, we attempt to get him wet through a group hug. haha.


Emo-ing.

Heartlanders shot.

Someone had a brilliant idea to kill time. Have a slippers race!
You'reo only allowed to push the water in hopes of letting the wave motion move your slipper.

And that was roughly how orientation was like :D
--

My Class 08S51

Doesn't it look like the front center 2 guys did not move at all? O.o

WE LOVE GP SO MUCH!!!ahem. Yeap, and so this is how VJ could be.

Elizabeth chirped at 3:11 PM | No comments

I find that when I fall in a pit, I like to stay there for awhile.
I'll let myself feel/experience the shitty feeling, I'll run away from the problem for a little while, then when i think I've experience these long enough, I'll get to working myself out of the pit.

I think many people are like that. Most of the time when there's something wrong in our lives and we know it, we'll let ourselves take the easy way out of running away. At least for a day or two. I think that's alright. That's why I tend to leave people alone to their pits when they first fall into it. Let them run for a little while, let them experience how dark and lonely it is in the pit. Soon they will realize their foolishness, wake up and start working to get out.

I think this works better than trying to point out their foolishness when they first fall in. More often than not, they would feel like they are being judge, get angry, and stay in the pit longer. It's more effective if they are the ones who decide they want to get out than being influenced by others.

Of course, if they stay there tooo long, then as a friend it's time to send them some warning signals.

Why am I talking about this? Sounds rather random. Because I think I'm in a pit.
I'm still finding it difficult to adapt to JC life. I have no idea what I'm spending my time on, but I just know that I feel tired and busy all the time. Orientation is over but I still feel disoriented. With the whole world. And it seems that no one would understand how I'm feeling because it's just plain bizarre.

Add on the disappointments. I've been feeling disappointed with myself. God has been so merciful. He points out my sins, chides me gently and then tells me He still loves me and would welcome me back with open arms. He's so good to me, I feel bad and disappointed that I can't seem to do anything for Him. He's so big, great and awesome. And I'm just a poor pathetic sinner who can't stop sinning. Yet He still comes and tell me how much He loves me. Sometimes it's not that God doesn't forgive us but we who can't forgive ourselves.

Yea, my life's a bit messy for now. I think I'm about to reach the stage of enlightenment where I finally start working my way out. Until then, I ask for patience from everyone I've been showing my tired face to or doing stuff with my less-than-normal enthusiasm or skill level.

I think I'll feel weird if I know that someone I don't know read this post. But heck, this is elizabeth. She gets low at certain points of her life. You can come back later and read how she overcomes these low parts. Haha. She'll get out, wait and see. Now she just needs a little time to conserve some energy before she gets off her butt and start climbing out.

Btw, I dreamt that I got 9 points for Os and cried in the school hall coz i was disappointed. How random. And I've finally gotten pictures from orientation, shall upload them when i have time.

Elizabeth chirped at 8:50 PM | No comments

Once again, I find myself speaking more than I should.
I think I'm really bad at keeping secrets, unless it's really personal and I can understand how hard it is for the person to reveal that particular thing to me.

Generally I believe in living a transparent life, so I often have the "don't do something you don't dare to tell ppl about" mentality, hence I often speak freely about what's on my mind. Then again, that's just an excuse. The plain fact is I can't control my tongue. Yep, I've finally admitted it. I often end up spoiling surprises unless i'm the one planning it. Sigh.
--
Well I was thinking, some people feel uncomfortable when they find out that people they don't know well are reading their blogs. I mean, I feel it too. You wonder if they would judge you or think you're weird because of something you said on your blog. Sometimes you wonder if you have destroyed whatever good impression a person may have had of you because of the immaturity reflected in your post. (I'm talking about ppl who air their views/opinions in their blogs and not those who just want to keep track of what they did today)

I wonder why are we so uncomfortable. I mean, if we feel uncomfortable, doesn't that mean that however we have been behaving in front of people is just a front? And what we talk about in our blogs is a more accurate indication of who we are? We hide our thoughts when meeting in person coz sometimes that's more polite, but on our blogs we let them go. That's why we're scared and afraid if random ppl read our blog coz basically, we don't like random strangers judging our "truer" selfs when we can't judge them too.

But heck. This is who I am. This is what I like to talk about, this is what makes me tick. If you think I'm weird, well.. welcome to the real world in which everyone is weird because no one is like you because we're all made unique individuals. Nah, more like you can either choose to accept me or well, think i'm weird and never talk to me again. Unless I'm doing something that is not right.

Yep. So instead of wondering what ppl who blog hop and chance upon my blog would think of me, I shall just let them make of it what they will.

That said, while blogs can be a good indicator of what a person is like, that alone doesn't tell you everything about a person.

Am I making any sense? I'm rather tired but I just felt like getting this out of my system.

I love me. Even with all my flaws which I'm trying to change, I still love me. And I'm trying to hold on to the shape He has given me when the world is demanding perfection and conformity.

Elizabeth chirped at 11:50 PM | No comments

I'm enjoying myself at VJ!
I LIKE MY CLASS!
Filled with rather "ON" people. Someone goes, Hey let's do this. And the rest will follow, unless it's to pon class. Sweet :D

That said, life at VJ is not a bed of roses either. I wish ppl would stop assuming that it is. For one, I find PE lessons rather shiong.
3.3km run + lack of sleep = 1 knocked out bird sleeping in the library
Oh oh! If the height and weight machine is accurate, I grew again. It says that I'm 1.73m :(

Well, with the O lvl results due any moment, I really hope that my class won't change too much.

If I don't get 7 points I wonder what I'll do. Would I question God? Would it affect my trust in Him? Sigh. I wish MOE would just announce the date so we can all stop speculating.

Elizabeth chirped at 6:31 PM | No comments

FINALLY!! I get time to blog!

I've been having lots of fun during Orientation. So much fun, I'm neglecting God. I think last sunday was the sleepiest I've ever felt in a sermon. Nothing went in at all. AT ALL. I've been feeling so shag, I can hardly say a proper prayer before getting knocked out.

I'm reminded of the story I think a speaker told during a sermon not too long ago. It's about an old man and a really beautiful and magnificent horse he had. He refused to sell it to anyone even though he was rather poor. Basically, the horse brings about some good stuff and some bad stuff. And each time the villagers will call the horse a blessing or a curse. But through it all, the old man refuses to name the horse either one. He'll just state the facts. I think I've been like the villagers in the way I've viewed VJ.

I still don't quite know what to make of it. My admittance was a miracle. I had lots of fun here, but I also felt lonely and uncomfortable at times. I rubbed shoulders with someone in authority yet I found that it was worth it. I feel like coming here has given my emotions a roller coaster ride. But all the same, I still think that this is the place I'm suppose to be.

I'm going to be a really busy person for the next 2 years. It's gonna be hard maintaining or even improving my walk with God when I stop thinking about him each time i'm busy. But I think, that's why I'm in VJ. I'm here for level two. My sec 3 and 4 life were pretty packed. I call that level one busyness. I overcame it with God's help. Now, He's presenting me a more challenging situation. Will I backslide under the pressure or will I shine even more? Once again, this blog shall record my battle against the world.

I'm sorry God that I didn't start well. I let "busyness" seperate you and me. But I'm going to be an overcomer. I'm going to let my life be a testimony for you once again. So, I'm going to have another hetic 2 years, but not only will i not fall away, I'll grow closer to you. I'll be an overcomer.

So 1 more resolution to add to my list. I resolve to turn up for church and continue to serve despite my schedule. Despite preperation for competition or exams. You'll see me in church and you'll watch me grow, get blest and bless.

With the experience that God honor those who honor Him from level one, I begin level two.
Chiong ah!

Elizabeth chirped at 8:51 PM | No comments

Orientation was fun today!
But something unexpected came up and now, I think trouble is brewing.
Sometimes you just wish that life was a lot simpler. But it's not. Coz we can't seem to give each other a break.

Elizabeth chirped at 11:14 PM | No comments

I'm SUPER TIRED!

But first things first. I want to thank God for healing me and seeing me through Today!!

So i think I ate something bad but anyway, I felt like puking the whole of yesterday. By last night, I wasn't getting any better but even had a slight fever. Which meant that I'm not fit for school. Try having orientation while you feel like puking all the time. Yea.

So I asked my dad and joey to pray. While he was praying, my whole left leg went numb without reaching the pins and needle stage. And i wasn't even sitting in a weird position. Which is quite strange since the last time i experience this, I felt it through the whole body and I was in the presence of the Holy Spirit o.O. I still duno wad to make of that.

Anyway, I woke up today with the fever gone, but still felt a bit nauseous. But I decided to take a step of faith and still go to school anyway. I figured that God would take care of me there. And yep, He sure did. When I reached VJ, I stopped feeling like puking. Sure, I still felt a bit uncomfortable if I stood for too long, but at least I wasn't feeling like puking anymore. THANK GOD FOR THAT :D

And the debate continues. PCME, PCMG or PGME??? diao.

Elizabeth chirped at 8:32 PM | No comments

It's 2008!
A new chapter begins.
I want to blog my final thoughts about 2007 so be prepared for a lengthy post with too much elaboration. =)

Well, looking back, I think God has blessed me abundantly since I starting following Him in sec 1. It's like, whatever I put my hands to, He blesses. Amazing isn't it?

At the start of the year, I had no goal. Didn't know what jc I wanted to go to and how well I wanted to do in my studies. I still remember the conversation I had with Mr AA in which he kinda like shot me down for aiming low. Then somehow, I felt God pushing me to set some pretty high goals. 7 pts, something I thought ridiculous when i first set it and to get into VJ, which I thought was impossible unless I achieved that ridiculous goal. haha.

Now that I really think about it, I would say that 2007 is a year God tried to increase my faith.

I went from thinking that 7 was a ridiculous goal into believing that I truly had the capabilities to get that with God's help. Whether I really get it is a different story. Knowing your potential and realizing it are 2 different things. But still, it's amazing that I actually believe it could happen. God did that. Each time I thought it was impossible, I felt this little voice daring me again and again. Daring me to believe. For surely His word holds true, that with God, all things are possible.

After my prelims result were out, I kinda lost hope in going to VJ. I couldn't make it in based on my results for Prelim. I figured that most people who got in there through prelims would stay there so there won't be a lot of vacant slots. Even if I did get 7 for Os, after minusing bonus points, I'm only in the partial zone. So it was a pretty hopeless situation. Then I got that call. Just when I finally ended my debate between meridian, nanyang and SA, the door to VJ was suddenly open again. God is just SOOO amazing isn't he?

So tmr I would find myself stepping into VJ as a student. Thanks be to God.
Nothing is impossible with God, if only we just believe that.

On a sidenote, God isn't biased. He wants to make all His children's cup overflow. But if people keep having the mentality that such things would never happen to them, they restrict God from working in their lives and then such things would REALLY never happen to them.

It's a cycle, like the prayer thing. Kinda hard to explain but it's like, God gives you a situation which requires level one faith. Person A believes and see something happen. Person B doesn't believe and nothing happens. When give a situation which requires level two faith, Person A is more likely to believe because he saw level one come to pass. Whereas Person B still doesn't dare to believe but is in fact hardened because of past failure. The process repeats so Person A keeps going upwards in faith and B keeps going down.

Get what I'm trying to say? I find that ppl often get lost in my elaborations. HAHA. Especially these few days coz I keep OOP-ing.

Ah well, happy new year!

Elizabeth chirped at 6:28 PM | No comments