I didnt drop off the face of the earth!

Although I would like to drop my computer off of one....we cannot figure out what is wrong with it. So until it gets fixed I will use the iPad to post when I can....Nate uses it at work so I can only do it when he is home and I tend to only want to hang with him when he's home and nothing else. Although march madness is coming up so I may be posting a lot except for the fact that I am holding out to read the hunger games till than!

So how is everybody? I hope well. I've had one hell of a month and just as I thought it was getting better I was wrong. Which got me thinking about tests and trials and the patterns they tend to have in my life. I don't have much to add to it cuz I'm still pondering it all, one thing I feel pretty sure about is that I'm suppose to be paying attention..there is something I need to learn. And just as I'm about to blame it on those who have despitefully used me...I get a little whisper to my heart..."this isn't about them...it's about you". My attention goes from blame and anger to pondering and listening. So that's what my status is at this moment in time..to just "be still". I wonder if these hardships weed out inconstancies and flaws that need to be taken care. It's interesting how god will protect you if you ask him to. When I asked I didn't think it would be in the way it has played out...I didn't think tears and pain would be involved in fact I thought that's what i was asking him to protect me from. But as I have quieted myself I'm starting to grasp that he sees the big picture..and not only that..he knows what is in my heart even more than I do and so he knows what he is protecting me from in my future...and even now. This all probably doesn't make much sense...but that's ok..it does to me. One thing is for sure...I am very grateful to have the teachings of jesus Christ...his way really does bring peace to my life. His way really does teach me to be happy even though opposition has been knocking down my door. I am also grateful for Nate. He has given me a strong arm to lean on and a broad shoulder to cry on. I am also grateful for my brother brad. He has helped me take a hard step that couldn't have come at a more crucial time for me..he has been himself and because of that it gives me courage to find my own self. Thank you. To all of you who get where Im At right now...remember that god always sends a ministry of angels living and not to guide you through to the peace you are searching for.



Disclaimer: if you read my blog and get offended..call me..let's talk. Other than that my blog is my blog..I write what is in my heart, I do not edit, I do not carefully write something to Get a point across or hint at something or someone. If you know me..you know Im a lover not a hater. If you feel bad after reading my feelings..please don't read it anymore, because that is not my intensions. Thank you.

Family

These people are my family..Lance is the oldest and funniest ..I love his dirty sense of humor and deep thinking. Mandy is the next oldest "foosie", she is the mother of the group and watches out for us all I enjoy her close friendship and unconditional love. Brad is the next in line.."beaner" He is the peacemaker and the one that holds us together. I am the baby "pucker -putt" I think too much and get a laugh from them all every once and awhile. We were able to go to dinner and just TALK when we were out in Missouri...we haven't ever been able to do that before. This was very healing for me and was really nice to remember the bond that we all share no matter what happens because we are family. these 3 individuals have shaped and molded my life with the hardships, the good times, the differences, the commonalities. There is no force in this world that could ever take away the 29 years of memories and friendships i hold close to my heart. I love you Lance, I love you Brad, and I love you Mandy...here's to 29 more years!

Ok

Here you go...this is what I look like now..short hair..chubby cheeks..my baby and I are twinners!! I m TOTALLY cheesin it in these pictures. I took these about a month ago. I sent them to Nate while he was at work to say I love you and Thanks for working so hard so I can stay home with my babies!!! that's why i'm cheesen it! GO ahead and laugh Im laughin with ya!

I miss

My LONG HAIR! I cut it short over a year ago to get rid of "dead fried hair" and start new...well my hair is shorter now than when I started. It accidentally got colored green a few months back so we had to cut it shorter than it's ever been before. Even though I get lots of great compliments on it and people tell me I look better with short hair....I just miss it. I felt so feminine with long hair..now my hair is just cute...I want it to be pretty! I hope I can grow it out long again. I have one more big cut to get it where i need it to officially grow it out. If I could just find the right color and then leave it alone so I don't keep damaging it. I'll tell ya what? it's HARD to grow your hair out when you are a hair dresser. The crappy part is..is that in these pictures you can't even tell it's damaged..but I remember doing my hair all of these days and feeling so frustrated that my hair wasn't healthy...well it looks healthy to me now that I look at the pictures...WHAT WAS I THINKING? oh well what can ya do? I'm sure I will do it again someday. for all you considering chopping your hair off...don't do it.

Mandy Waters

Is my sister, but she is not only that she is:
An amazing hostess
She taught me how to do freezer meals
She sews the cutest stuff and made me my very own apron!
Her homemade bread, rolls and cinnamon rolls are to die for!
She also taught me how to make these!

Her home FEELS like a home..and is so inviting and warm
She allways has my favorites at every get together...chips and dip
and an amazing veggie tray with ranch
She has a natural gift of empathy for all people
She captures memories like no other can. she teaches herself
anything she wants to learn and excels beyond measure
She coaches soccer really well

Her front porch and yard are so beautiful and inviting in all seasons


She makes the most amazing cakes for birthdays!
She listens to our prophet..and is completely prepared for an emergency
Her blue eyes are just a taste of the beauty that lays within
Her home usually is filled with family, friends, and fun!
She is a natural at nurturing

She is a mommy of 4 soon to be 5 FABULOUS boys!
She Loves her husband more than anything and lets him BE
who he wants to BE!


Mandy Waters...Yes she is my sister, she is a mommy, a wife, a photographer, a cook, an artist a friend, a nurturer, a homemaker, a Gardner, a decorator, a cake maker, a hostess, an example...But most of all she is my guardian angel on earth and I am soooo happy that families are forever and our bond is eternal! She has been the most influential person in my life consistently. I love that she doesn't hide her light under a bushel. she shares her gift with so many of us and anybody that knows her feels the talent that just oooozes out of her. I could go on FOREVER about all the things she has taught me..but I think the number one thing she has given to me is a living example of unconditional love. she is so humble about her beauty inside and out. a little too hard on herself sometimes but magnificent in all areas of her life. I probably know her better than anyone other than Keith and I say she is what every woman would strive to be like. she has no problem admitting when her kids need help outside herself...I have met so many mothers that are in denial that their kids need something other than what they can give them...but not Mandy..with all her talents she still loves her boys more than herself and will check her pride out the door even brace judgments of others if it's what is BEST for her little ones. Her husband doesn't talk much to people...he keeps to himself..But not once...not ever have I EVER heard her make excuses for him or apologize for the uncomfort it brings some people..she loves him and excepts him for who he is not what others expect him to be like. She has never gone to college but she is one of the smartest woman I've met. If she wants to do something she teaches herself. she taught herself how to cook from scratch, she taught herself how to sew, she taught herself how to make just about every craft on her walls, she taught herself how to be a photographer, she taught herself how to scrap book, she taught herself how to make her home and yard beautiful. She lives within their budget..and enjoys her life. She's one of the few woman i've met that does not make excuses of why they cant...she just does it. i never hear her complain about hardships she goes through..sure she vents but she doesn't have the attitude of what can others do for me rather she takes responsibility for her choices and life and makes the necessary changes. she is my hero. i love you mandy

love your little sis

Remember the park

I miss it these days. I told Tavis this morning that he needed gloves and a hat and boots cuz its REALLY cold outside. He looked out at the sunshine and said "no it's not mom, the sun is shining bright today which means its not cold". I explained to him that the sunshine isn't just warm and inviting..but that it can be decieving too. He looked at me like he wanted to ask what I meant but resolved that it was to early for that kind of inquiry. I love the sunshine..it just makes me happy. I am very grateful for the brightness in my home today I love it..but more than just seeing it I love to bask in it while my kids get exercise on the play ground while we all socialize with friends or I with a great book. We are avid park attendees. AT LEAST 3 times weekly if not more. i'm really looking forward to getting a cherry hill pass this year to be in the sun even more! On a side note..My dear sweet Olivia slept 10 hours straight last night!!! she's a quick learner. all day yesterday I let her fall asleep on her own for naps..it was fabulous to get a full nights rest last night. All though I actually feel more tired today then yesterday...its like my body wants more. I had a really hard day yesterday..I call it my "I don't care days" I just didn't care about doing one little thing other than playing with my kids, eating ice cream and talking on the phone. I also call it "a funk" I get in those every now and again and they are hard to get out of. I cared about something a little too much and got my feelings hurt so it spiraled me down to just not caring at all! The good news is the I am coming out of this one fast. the sunshine helps alot..but also this morning I went walking with my good buddy Lori at 5:30am and it was FREEZING..but you should never underestimate good clean oxygen in your lungs, endorfens running through your body, and a good friend that will tell you how it is..."forgive and forget, until you have walked a mile in that persons shoes you have no room to judge" she's right and so are the other people I have confided in. I love my inner influence of friends and family..they are all such good people with great hearts who love me and help me be bigger than my natural self! thus I feel sooo much better now and I have let go of the offense and am moving on to a new day! The other good news is is that I feel at peace now. It was like as soon as i started judging another the spirit left me. I could actually FEEL the difference in my thoughts, actions, and motives. I felt alone and I did not like it at all..I wonder if that is what I call depression. not having the holy ghost with me. I strive really really hard to make sure I am listening to uplifting music, words and conversation, reading good books and being kind to others not just in action but also what is in my mind about them..there's a reason I strive to live this way..because I want my good friend the holy ghost to all ways be invited into my life..he just makes it so much more joyful and he really does help me see things in a whole new perspective..so when I uninvite him to be with me I feel it..and I don't like it..I feel alone and sad..and depressed..oh my goodness I just had an ah ha moment..hmmmm that's cool. anyways, Im feeling much better and am thankful that I can be forgiven and for repentance. All right since I just went off on a tangent...let me share some fun pictures of a few of our wonderful park days last year. ( these are haileys 3 best friends)