let silence reign for the moment, that might last.

Gaya-Shalu-Sivan
27th March 2006
My Birthday!!!
I love ya girls! or should i say, PANDI!!!

 

Happy Birthday to ME !!!!!! :)


Pre-bday celebrations! Haha! Over at my place and major photo taking @ Sin Ming & LakeSide!

U wld prolly think i had nv seen a cake before! / Brother feeding me with da yummy cake! / Sens and Me! / Sens & my bro, imitating Sajeetha & Me! hmmph! / another lame pose! haha! / Renuka & Me! she was my bday surprise! / Renuka holding "weeeee" the Winnie the Pooh & Me holding da wallet she got me! / Bro & me on da swing at Sajeetha's place! / a nice pic with brother / Sin Ming makkals' lame pose! / Sajee, Me & Deeps! / Deepa Darling & Me!! she's now da new MIA girl! / Deeps & me again! / me blowing out da candles! / 3 of us again, sorry deeps, i didnt mean to cut u out! / yummy bday cake courtesy of Muru!! its cheese, fruit, walnut cake! slurps!!!

That was sunday. Sens, Sajeetha, Muru came over. And brother brought Renuka over too! So fun man.. Really had lotsa fun. Thats why i said it wasnt even my birthday yet but it feels like it is. Been celebrating since Friday.. Goodness. Today is a quiet day for me then. No i doubt that. Gaya and Shalu are coming over. There goes peace and quiet! Hahah!! Thanks everyone for the calls and sms-es. Hemma sms-ed at 11 plus cause she had to sleep soon! haha! Thanks Vanisha for wishing me online! Haha! CHEATER BUG GAYATHRI NAIR, called me at 11.30pm and chatted till it was 12, so she was the first to wish me! for 3 consecutive years! haha.. idiot! and Huishan, who was da first to sms! I miss you girl, we should catch up, with Geksan, Mabel and Cynthia too. Satheeshh called in da morn, when i was still sleepin and ya, kavitha just called. oh ya, Nava aunt and Kaveri aunt called too. hahhaha..

Thanks thanks thanks for all the gifts cards sms everything! Turning 19 has been fun.
But honestly, i dun feel 19 at all! hahaha!

Fid's and My birthday chalet!!
Criz and Me, first pic of da day man! / Jinghui and me! the 'cappers'!! / Group pic! Jh, Min, Me & Criz! / Fid & Me cutting the cake dat Criz & Eileen bought! / Terry Werry's stylo pose! / Firry!! / Fid didnt let me hold the bday knife! :( / Leon Mr.Robocop!! / Benny! another stylo pose! / "Cheese!!" Fid too absorbed with da cake! / Yuanzhi doesnt like takin pics. But i do!! / Benny & Me! / Da deco in our chalet! so sweet right!! / Criz Loves Sivan!!! / Beginning of camera whoring: Daphne, Vanisha, Me & Criz! / Yeah, its me!! haha! nice pic! / So now u know, Daph loves Vanisha & Criz loves Me! / retro Daphne with dunno-whose glasses! / Minyi & Me!! / leon doesnt like taking pics too. but min LOVES! / 'Beautiful Boxer' Firhan with 'Million Dollar Baby' Me! / Criz & Me pointing out to Daphne and Vanisha! Spot them?! / Midnight supper and KhorkiEe's finally with us! / Fid holding the photo album dat Ifa made for him & dats our dear KhorkiEe! / The 'curry puff' skirt girl Daphne with 'the millon-faces' Vanisha!!


So thats how saturday evening went. Uzair was also there too. Alamak no pics of him! He made me play this scavenger hunt that eventually led me to my gifts, which were in the freezer!! haha!
i have the most wonderful and sweetest friends!

GUYS!!! Thanks for EVERYTHING! Thanks for organising the chalet, thanks for coming, thanks for the gifts and hugs, even the wet hug from Fid & Ifa, thanks for cam-whoring with me (dass, daphne & Criz!), thanks for the yummy cake, Criz & Eileen, thanks for the bday song Eileen, in ur 'sexy' voice! thanks for the many many many pictures! thanks for the car rides, courtesy of Mr.Eric! thanks for the cake smearing by Fid and bottom line; thanks for coming, cause it was absolutely great to see everyone again!!!
BESTEST birthday celebration ever! and it wasnt even my bday yet! hahhahaa!!
I LOVE EVERYONE !!!!!! :)

 

Happy Birthday to Mariah Carey!! :)

 

My mum can't keep surprises. Goodness!!!!!!!!!
I feel so bad for brother, cause he wanted to give me a surprise.
Now mum has sorta told me.

Aiyohhhhhhhh...............
Gimme a SURPRISING surprise pleaseeeeeeeeeeee............

I'm back home. Last night actually. Been hell lotsa fun meeting Gaya, Shalu and Ranjan.
For once i wasnt early. Poor Shalu was so early. Haha.. And Ranjan, who doesnt have a sense of time, despite wearing that whatever watch! Haha! I just insulted Ranjan's brand new Marc Ecko watch. Haha.. Shd have seen that look on his face. Anyway Ranjan was more crude than usual last evening during dinner. My goodness. You would think that after 5 years plus he would have matured a bit, well he did, sorta. Haha.. Nevertheless, i wun complain k Ranjan.
Thanks for coming. Without you, Shalu, Gaya and i wldnt be laughing. I almost choked on sambal stingray at one point, cause you said some stupid stuff that i can't publish here, or else your reputation wld be GONE! Wahahaha..

And my ever-wonderful ChandraShalu and Gayathri.. =) I didnt pay a single cent for dinner. It was on them! Oh ya, dinner was at Lau Pa Sat anyway. Been ages since i went there.
After dinner, we walked to Esplanade.. Rooftop, where we just listened to the songs in Ranjan's handphone. Damn i like that phone!! W800i! DAMN!!
Ya, and then i had to leave lah. It was okay, i reached home at 11.30pm. Surprisingly dad was also awake. And i forgot to bring my key, as usual, so i knocked the door and dad came to open it. Surprisingly my dad didnt say anything abt the time. Guess he's cutting me some slack.
Good good. Of course mum will say "what is the time now? Why so late?" but that's normal lah. No lecture, No scoldings. GOOD. Yeap. So Sivan finally got her allowance from her work.
Not Salary, its ALLOWANCE k. And a hundred dollars went to mummy dearest.
Yeah, my first ever pay! So deprived right? Anyway, ya, mum asked why am i giving her! Aiyoh, why wld i give money to my dad? He's earning anyway.
He wld have just asked me to keep it lah.

Slacked in my room. Haha.. watched a hindi movie.
Its Gaya's anyway. Keep forgetting to pass it to her.
And then finally wenta sleep.

Thats how my friday evening went lah.
Now i'm at home, tapping away at the keyboard.
Class chalet in the evening.
Some plans got COCKED UP i presume. So what's new.

Looking forward to see Fid, KhorkiEe, Terry, Uz, Min and company.
U too Dass!

Oh ya, forgot to mention that i saw Daphne last evening around at Esplanade. Haha..
Funny thing was that i kept seeing random girls who actually looked a bit like her.
Then suddenly i really saw her. Haha.. Nice nice.

Happy weekends. I gotta go back to work tmr morning. Meeting. Bummer.

"Perhaps it is only when a family is destroyed
and must rebuild itself that we become
aware of what it means to have one."

Nice quote huh. Got it from a book review website.
Makes plenty of sense doesnt it.

Anyway, am at office now. Somewhat peaceful.
Just hope the telephone(s) doesnt start ringing soon.
When was the last time you felt at peace with yourself?

So i have a meeting on sunday. It kinda messes up my plans a bit, but well, i have to go for it. Luckily the chalet is in Pasir Ris. I just hope i don't doze off during the meeting.
And i have to ask dad if he can pick me up after the meeting. Planned to have lunch with Kumutha aunt & company over at west coast. Pasir Ris to West Coast. I feel like i'm taking a road trip. Hallehlujah everyone.

On a lighter note, i'm meeting Gaya, Shalu and Ranjan tmr.
That's great. But these wonderful people don't reveal where we gonna have dinner at. Well, i should be the one choosing!
Haha. Spoke to them last night. So i've plans on the 24th, 25th and 26th. Why not 27th?! Haha. Prolly slack the day at home or something.

Its just the start of the day. I need some work to do!
Afternoon will be better, cause Alester will be here! Haha..
The Lamers Club. =)


Happy belated birthday Kimmy Kimmy Chan Chan Chan! :)


HALLO VANISHA DASS! I'M SEEING YOU ON SATURDAY!
LALALALALA....

"Perhaps it is only when a family is destroyed
and must rebuild itself that we become
aware of what it means to have one."

Nice quote huh. Got it from a book review website.
Makes plenty of sense doesnt it.

Anyway, am at office now. Somewhat peaceful.
Just hope the telephone(s) doesnt start ringing soon.
When was the last time you felt at peace with yourself?

So i have a meeting on sunday. It kinda messes up my plans a bit, but well, i have to go for it. Luckily the chalet is in Pasir Ris. I just hope i don't doze off during the meeting.
And i have to ask dad if he can pick me up after the meeting. Planned to have lunch with Kumutha aunt & company over at west coast. Pasir Ris to West Coast. I feel like i'm taking a road trip. Hallehlujah everyone.

On a lighter note, i'm meeting Gaya, Shalu and Ranjan tmr.
That's great. But these wonderful people don't reveal where we gonna have dinner at. Well, i should be the one choosing!
Haha. Spoke to them last night. So i've plans on the 24th, 25th and 26th. Why not 27th?! Haha. Prolly slack the day at home or something.

Its just the start of the day. I need some work to do!
Afternoon will be better, cause Alester will be here! Haha..
The Lamers Club. =)


Happy belated birthday Kimmy Kimmy Chan Chan Chan! :)

I am soooooo in love with this. This is the Aprilia Mojito 150.
If love has an image, mine would look like this. Sighhh..
If i want this, i have to fight for this.
But one day, YOU will be MINE.

the feeling of being in love.. might beat all other feelings that we're dealing with.
might cause us happiness, and maybe so much of pain.
makes you wanna fly up high above, all because of this love.
you think you're invincible, just cause you're in love and being loved.
suddenly spice girls' love songs become nice to listen to, maybe to sing along to even.
there's a lightness in your steps, a lightness in your heart, that explains the floating feeling.
there's even a rhythm to your steps, each step feels like you're dancing.
maybe i could go on and on about this. and this only.
maybe i could. give me someone to love.. and i can go on for hours and miles.

Yeah! Fid has the best designing skills man! Anyway ya, the pic says it all. If anyone close wanna come join in da fun, just lemme know. Next Sat! And Pasir Ris Holiday flats are at 110 Elias Road if i'm not wrong. =)

 

ARMY DAZE with Sajeetha! At National Library's Drama Centre. Man da play is damn bloody good. And the star of the whole show, according to me, is KUMAR!!! Hahaha!! 

Ahh, Renga's rocked Marche! Haha! And Swensens!
Brother was there, Sajeetha, Letch, Karthik, Sara and Me! Special guest appearance by Gunaraj! Haha! I shall post more pics up! Anyway, the food was great and the company, greater! I always like going out with the Rengas. Especially the little ones, cause we only see each other on special occasions and parties. We seldom go out and have fun like this. So ya, Letch is extremely comical, man her jokes always crack me up, but then again, what doesnt?! and Guna and brother take turns to disturb the poor Sajeetha! hahaha!! Karthik is 'relek-relek' and Sara, she's just quiet. God know why man, but she's quiet! Haha!! Next time, we shall call the rest of da RENGAS!!!!

 

i can't even view my own blog! it seems as though i am not authorized to do so!! argh!!

All i want for birthday is youuuuuuu

so this gayathri and this vanisha have been relentlessly asking me what i want for my birthday. and i told gayathri, but i didnt tell vanisha. but what this vanisha did was to talk to gayathri and find out from her. see how much she loves me so?! haha.. i will make your lives easier okay? fine.

i wanna get
- a wallet
- a watch
- a sweater/jacket that actually keeps me warm!
- a ring (gayathri u rmbr da one we saw?!) haa!
- more t shirts

And the reason why i prefer to get these stuffs myself is because i am extremely picky about these things, so i like to see what kinda stuff they r before i buy them. ahah.

gayathri nair and vanisha dass! dun waste your money can!
and of course, what i want the most is lunch or dinner with you guys before my birthday! haha!
and lunch/dinner with shan, san, cyn, mabel and premma too.
and juan and company too.
and my poly ppl! Fid, Criz, Min, Uz, Terry, KhorkiEe, Eileen, and the list continues! haha!
oh ya, FAMILY!!!! Lunch with brother, mum and dad. it must be brother's treat!
and with Nava sithi, Bala uncle, Hemma and Divya too.
and hopefully with Sajeetha, Deepa, Sens and company too.

that's all. and ya, i want good results for exams.
results will be known tmr!!!! yikes!

tata for now!!

seek solace in me

seek solace in me
for i am yours to be
seek solace in me
find comfort in words that please
feel not judged by those you see
judged are those who aim to please
carry me with you wherever you may
carry me within you this i say
trying times might get you down
you might be wounded by 'friends' around
half-opened eyes might deceive
an opened heart might give you grief
seek solace in me
i'll be waiting here
seek solace in me
your cries only i can hear.

I forgot to blog that i went back to Deyi on da 7th March. All because Netta asked me to go for the PSL's first ever investiture. So i did. I took a day off from work. Haha. Nice sup was cool with that.

Yeap. So as planned, i was to meet Maryann at 12:15pm at amk. And i reached at 12pm. So i waited. And at 12:10pm, Maryann calls me and says that she is gonna leave home then. The lateness queen herself. Why do you guys like to make me wait?! Oh wells, so i called YongKang who was coming down all da way from Pasir Ris. and thank goodness, he came down to meet me. And we waited for Ms.Maryann who cabbed down. And we saw Jenny, our senior too. So we cabbed with Maryann to Deyi.

Going back was fun. Mrs.Raja was shocked to see me. I really dunno why. Of course i saw Mrs.Ang SB, Mrs.Joyce Ang, Mdm.Kalpana, Mrs.Singh. And Ms.Foo, who seems to be getting younger and younger!
The investiture was not bad. Nett and i kept commenting. haha.. gossip people!
The PSLs actually credited us, the PSL Alumni! Haha.. Kind children. After the whole thing, we went down to da canteen for photo taking. i shd prolly upload da pics soon. I will.

Yeap. Oh ya, how can i forget this? I saw Ms.Renu!!!! Hahaha.. Who is Renuka, my darling friend, who is also a teacher there now! Haha.. Great to see her too. =)

Lunch was with Jenny, YK and Maryann at good old MacDonalds which holds so much of memories. You see, Singapore is so small that most places you go to, you will definitely have some form of memories there. Its both good and bad, if you know what i mean. And amk central has too much of memories for me. Esp Mac. Well ya.. Jenny seemed at ease to talk and crap with us, despite the fact that we havent seen each other for a few years. It was really good eating with them. We were laughing so much. Haha. And then Maryann had to leave and Jenny also left. YK was going back to Downtown East and i was going back to Pasir Ris so he wanted to go hm to wash up first. So i went to his place first. And then we took a bus to Pasir Ris. Haha. Tired us were knocked out in da bus! And i was woken up by Divya's sms!!!! Haha.. from there, we went our separate ways.

One thing abt YK; he is really a wonderful friend. Since sec sch, he has always been. Haha.. Although rather quiet at times, he is wonderfully lame. Unlike Reagan who has completely gone MIA, YK is still here. I thought Reagan and i were much closer friends, but i guess i was wrong. I guess i was wrong about many things. But with YongKang, i wasnt wrong. =)

As we grow older, we should really grow wiser. There's nothing wrong in a little madness in us at times, but of course, we need to grow wiser as we age too.
Now i know we do not make sense most of the times. Well so do i. we goof around too much and crack so many jokes that when we really get serious about something, no one believes it. Now isnt that frustrating? To not be taken seriously when you really are. That happens often. Especially when you are dealing with people younger than you? And they do not take you seriously and continue goofing around with you? Infuriating at times.

Okay. That's not the issue now.
So ya, Ranjan quoted that we were "once frenz". Pandi. So what are we now?! So you will let a little tiff change the way things are between us? Gaya and i bought u a Vday gift.. how can you forget that?! sobs.


It was just a few minutes ago that i thought the office was sooo quiet. Now, the phone keeps ringing almost non-stop. Argghhh.. But still, i like my office. =) Haha.. Hey! Alester is here! I thought it's is off day! Haha! Now this fella Alester here, is sucha nice guy. Really. From the first week of my ipp, he has been so helpful. Really. This bunch of colleagues that i have, they are a wonderful group of people. I am actually happy working here. Its not ideally what i would like to do, but the company makes up for it. I will definitely miss them after April 28.
Now i was wondering if i could get birthday off! Haha. I guess its better not to ask for it, i've already taken an off day on the 7th March. So i will work, on my birthday. Just another day i guess.

Ahh ya, when i was going back after work last evening, i saw a Phamtom bike. And the person who happened to be riding that was a lady in a Tudong! No offence to the race or anything lah. Its just that mum likes to say that we don't see indian girls riding bike. Hallo! My senior in sch has a bike! Now all i want for my birthday is a bike, make it a Vespa. Haha! I am contemplating asking my dad to get me a Vespa, then i can go get my bike license. How bout that? Good idea?
I'm in love with bikes, and it feels great to be in love! And i'm in love with many other things and people too. That's why i am happy most of da times! Haha.. Love makes me happy. =) Of course love gets you down at times too. No, i'm happy now, so i won't think of sad stuff.

Enough blogged! I should do something worthwhile.
Should i ask my supervisor to give me more work?
Haha! I've completed my ppt. 3 Cheers!
And Sajeetha, saturday u free? Call me k! Tata!

The day changes like the weather. Either's its a good day or a bad one. Just like how it might be blistering hot today and shockingly cold the next day. Or the day could be like the weather over here. Sunny all the way. Well, so has my day been. Not sunny all da way. Sun's much brighter today than yesterday.

I think i can finally let go of Mass Com. Of wanting to do mass com i mean. I no longer have that strong interest anymore. I know that was what i wanted to do since secondary school. But not anymore. I write because i want to, i like to. I dun write because it's a chore to me. That's not how i want to be. To be writing for the sake of writing. I will write as and when i wish. That's how i want it to be.
If that's the case, how about majoring in journalism? I dun mind. I can't guarantee that i can write what i love to write about. But still, if writing in that aspect makes me happy, i dun see why i shouldnt pursue journalism.

Going into career-wise, like many others, i still do not know what i want to do ultimately. Aunt and i were talking about it this afternoon. And so aunt asked if i might consider joining the Prison Service. I have seriously thought about it. And it's a challenging job which would definitely give me job satisfaction. You have the opportunities to changes lives, to mould ex-convicts into better person. Yes, i would take the challenge. I can't sit at a desk all day, tapping away at the computer and staring at the monitor till my head hurts. However if it is part of a job that i love, then i would absolutely not mind doing it. Same goes for joining the Force.

Actually there are lots of opportunities out there. Just that, we do not make full use of them. And later when these opportunities go to expats, we complain!
Where i would land in the future, or you might land, we might never know. Whatever the future brings, i hope it's good.
Let's not ask for much.
I've been pondering over the idiom "the grass is always greener on the other side."
Or you can ponder over it in Tamil,
"ikkarai maattuku, akkarai pacchai." Which means, "the cow on this side thinks the grass is greener on the other side," Haha.

so i'm not having a good day.. kinda screwed things up here. and i'm feeling really really sucky and lousy about it.
haven't felt this bad in a long time. damn..
i'm just wishing for the day to be over soon. so that i can just get things over with.


thanks KhorkiEe for talking to me.
and thanks for saying u'll come down later.
=)

Sizta, somehow unknowingly u always manage to perk me up when i'm feeling low. thanks for ur tag and lunch with u is always welcomed by me.


SCREWED UP.

Doesnt it make sense when i say,

Just when you thought one was nice, he/she proves otherwise.
At da end of da day, they're all da same.

Ooooo and how can I even forget - the highligh for the day! Sivan, who hardly wears anything feminine or dresses up in the 'girly' sense was in a SARI! Yep and I couldn't believe my eyes though I knew way before that she was gonna be wearing one since it was the dress code for the females. And did I mention? She looked S-T-U-N-N-I-N-G! My entire family was awed by her beauty last night *sajeetha drools*

Note to Sivan: So darling, now you know. Feminity suits you best! Go on, be encouraged to dress up and who knows, you might end up breaking millions of hearts. Muacks!
_________________________________________________

Now that was ripped off from Sajeetha's blog.
As you can prolly read, she is absolutely biased towards me! Haha! Okay, it was sooooo sweet of you sizta. I am laughing. Haha.. Goodness..

Okok, enough. I need to get back to work!
Ya siz, thanks for the flattery! Coffee soon k!

I love my DCM!! She buys great food to da office!! :)
Yeap. I hereby declare my love for her!

Happy Birthday Terry! :)

Haha.. we were over at Terry's place.
He was blind folded and brought over to his own place by KhorkiEe. Haha. Poor khorkiEe had to make dunno-how-many turns at the car park while waiting for Dass and me to reach his place. It was great.
Uz, Fid, Raz, Im, Daph, Peinam, his girlfriend, Mac, Mel were also there. Good to see them.. some of them lah. haha..

anyway, Terry Lee! i hope you like the surprise party and the helmets and the card. =)
Thanks for being so nice.. haha..
He even accompanied me to da bus stop when i left his place. Prata soon k? :)

And KhorkiEeSamy! It was good seeing u too. Meet up soon k. Cldnt talk much yesterday. =)
Thanks Daphne for 'keeping me company'! Haha! U're great.
Razinah get well soon. U too Fid!
Uzairrr!! Haha.. we ate alot ya? actually u did. i just accompanied u! haha..
Im, try to have fun at ur workplace. go learn mandarin in da meanwhile k! haha.
Dass! dun kan cheong da next time k! hhaa.. ur mum's cooking is nice! we will meet up for dinner soon. i mean, soon!!

to da rest i cldnt meet, i miss all of you!

Shan! Congrats on ur results! so sorry i cldnt make it da other day. we'll meet up soon. Mabel, sorry too!
Cynthia, i'll see ya on tues. Geksan, when am i seeing ya?!

Pandi Gayathri and Shalini!! i'm seeing ya guys tmr!!! hahahaa.. with Ranjan too. haha..

Premma, tmr! no violence with the fork please.


Neshie Smashie!! :) Hallo!!!
Tell Deepa i missed her! no, i didnt miss you much! haha!