is this the cursed land where the troubles never end
we switch on the tv and this is what we see;
bombs, riots and fights everywhere
people yelling and shouting while some couldnt even care
dead bodies sprawled around getting stepped on
while the city's in chaos with people losing their ground
first the tsunami, then the floods
you know it affects me when i see them losing all they've got
see the kids waddling through the water
they're too young to know if things would get better
and the mums are worried that they wont get any food
tell me, where is all the good in this world
there is little humanity there yet some hearts shine ever so shiny
and i see a glimmer of hope and i pray that it would last
not only through the adversity but till every day would pass
when you turn on the news nothing seems to be new
its the same old sad sobbing story and its not just a few
oh if i knew, like maybe God do, then i would have done something
cause my heart breaks everytime their spirits and hope shake
even though i'm so far away there's no single day where i dont pray for them
i see the scars from their daily battles and wonder if its gonna stay
are things gonna be the same or will they ever change one day
i wish i could ask God why he tries to put these people through
all these terrible things and what they have done to deserve this
tell me please would you answer me or tell me where do i go to find your reply
they say the world's coming to an end, is this true
i hope not though i see it swirl
and the seas and the clouds changing from time to time
is that a sign or a premonition that the world's gonna change its position
and again i wish i can read God's mind and do something to prevent all these
sheesh, sometimes living in this world isnt that fine, do you agree
dont you see what's going on the tv and the papers
war everywhere, there arent any lovers, just the haters
they're playing their war games, the world isnt the same anymore
and before all these, i remember there was peace
well not all was peace but there was still some
when good things come you know they gotta go too
whew, this has been going on for too long will it ever stop
and we bring it back to the top to the question
is this a cursed land where the troubles never end
the only person who could answer this is the God
maybe he was too busy, maybe he just forgot.

Just a random conversation with Vanisha over msn.
She's the one in purple and me in red.. this really made me laugh man!


Prata Lover says:
nalla friend lah nee!!!
v a n i s h a - life and death brigade says:
nalla frienduku nala friend theyvai
v a n i s h a - life and death brigade says:
MY GOD
Prata Lover says:
OH MY GOD!

*Translation: I said she's a good friend and she replied that a good friend needs a good friend! Haha!


Vanisha! Ur tamil improving greatly! Keep it up! :)

Ranjan Kumar!! Its a candid shot, and its good isnt it? Haha! This guy here rocks! 

That's Gayathri.. wearing my jacket.. while waiting for bus.. what to do, i was bored.. 

yay!! i've successfully revived the unconcious person!!  

CEPP! Me demonstrating CPR. i think the officer behind me is cute! haha! thanks qiu for sending me the pics! haha! 

sometimes u feel like giving up on a person. because you dunno where u stand with him/her.
you think you've tried so hard with the person till you can't try no more.
you just feel like walking away without him/her.
you just want to.
then something stops you. you just dun want to walk off.
you dont want to give up on that person.
because if you've hold on for so long, why would you wanna throw it all away in a split second?

i guess that's what i'm feeling right now. i wanted to just walk away from everything. from all the years.
but i couldnt. i never could. back then, and even now.
and i realise, i shdnt walk away. there's too much to lose.
and i'm glad i didnt. =)

friends don't just give up on each other. and i won't too.


dear ******,
we've had these 5-6 years so far. i know things haven't been great and all. but surprisingly u're still a part of my life. and i'm glad you are.
it makes a big difference.




life seems blissful.. for the moment at least.

This is a candid shot taken by Huishan. She asked us to pose for a pic and both of us went "who wants to take a picture with HER?!!" *click* went the camera! Shan says its my attitude face! haha! 

Dun ask what kinda pose this is! As suggested by Cynthia! The SPP; from left: Premma, Me, Geksan, Cynthia, Huishan and Mabel! 

Her life was such that it didnt mean much to her
Life held in her delicate hands, slowly slipping away
She's losing her ground, losing her stand
Impatiently she waits, just for the end

She has lost, the will to live
She gave up searching for, her beliefs
What went wrong, nobody knows
Nobody she told,
Till the day, to the devil she sold her soul

Hatred filled her beating heart
Anger and scorn tore her apart
What would happen, only time would tell
As fury and malice befell

The ending of the story, is yet to be penned down
Where is the glory, none was around
The Lucifer stays on with her
Not too far but just quite near

The scars may heal, this time will reveal
But the pain will never fade away
It'll stay, it'll reappear again
And when that happens ... ...

Vanisha!! This is for you man! I did a REPORT on YOU!!! Honoured???!!! 

Criz and our Fitness Instructor Tan Tse Yong!! the gentleman who drove me home after dinner on saturday! 

Jinghui's Oscar smile! Haha!! 

I wrote Hanson's name in Tamil! And he pasted it on his sleeve!! Nice?!! Haha!! What a wide grin Hanson?! 

My primary school friends Ching Wen and Michelle.. At Harry's Bar!! Sivan was in a bar!! Haha!! Pls dun tell my dad that! 

End of TEP!! Some of us with Mr.Lee and Mr.Ng..  

That's Kavitha, Prakash and Me. Okay i know i really look chachat here.. however u spell that.. because, i didnt put any gel!!  

Darling Prakash posing! I really like his "Thomas and Friends" t shirt! 

I'm back.


So many stuff to update. But, i dun feel like going on in details. My passion for writing is waning off. Why...

Okay nvm i shall try!

Met Sajeetha last last sunday. and the rest of the Renga's clan too.
Aunty was feeding me cake as though it was my birthday! That was really funny. Everywhere i turned to, she was there feeding me the cake! And then it was Sajeetha! I guess they were just happy to see me. I was too. Sad i couldnt really spend much time there. As i was leaving to Sajeetha's place, Ayla anni said to me "so u are really dropping by only lah?!"
I felt so bad.. i have so many ppl to catch up with.

Sorry everyone. I havent really been there at all. I'll catch up with you when i can. Now that my FRIDAYS ARE FREE CAUSE I DUN HAVE CLASSES ON FRIDAYS!!!!

Joy to the world!!!! :)

Was playing with Uma sis' children.. so adorable.. the 6 year old Raquel and the 8 year old Mathias! Haha.. will never forget how Raquel posed for the picture.. goodness.. a picture frenzy girl in the making! ahh.. kids, they can really make your day..



So school has started.. things are okay.. alright..
Vanisha, thanks. You know why.

Okay im being absolutely random here. So when i have something proper to blog about, i shall blog.

Till then, i shall share something that Vanisha shared with me!

we are different people with different friends..
some friends are for fun,
some friends are there to share your sorrow,
some are there just for shopping,
some are there just for games you have in common.

Ponder over it..

Daily Singles:
Yikes -- that quick temper of yours isn't far below the surface, and you might even snap at someone you think is sweet. Bite your tongue and keep out of the way now, so you don't alienate anybody.

Provided by Astrology.com

Shoot! How true can that be?!!

Feeling f***ed up but i dont know why.
My mind is screwed up while my heart is worked up.
I wish i wasnt even here sometimes.
Thinking so much till it hurts my mind.
Wasting the days and nights all these time.
Life doesnt have to give you everything you ask for.
But i asked the minimal, nothing more.
Can't even get that, what the hell.
I know i dont say this, but it really hurts.
But you dont even notice this, do you?
Do you even care, cause you're never there.
The only thing i want is what i can never get.
But i dont wish to let go because i dont have the heart to do that.
Its crazy cause i care while you dont.
And its crazy cause i'm loving you and you simply wont love me too.
Tell my heart to give it up. I cant try.
Cause i've tried enough.
But you're blinded to it, you dont like such stuff.
I'd rather leave than to let go.
But now i'm letting you know.
If you change your mind, tell me.
Cause you have all my time.


Feeling pathetic. Just not a good day i guess. Maybe not a good week. Its the end of TEP. Semester 2 starts on Monday.
I'm missing my donkeys.. sighhh..
Qiuyu and me on night shift at the gym. Anna's on MC. Let's count down the time..

Renga's Clan. And its only half of it! There's still half more! Ha! The cousins, plus Uma siz's 2 kids. The macho men standing behind us! Before that, Senthil bro and my bro were playin with Keegan's toy rifles! 

Whew. Finally a picture with the one and only Sajeetha! We call ourselves the Missing In Action Cousins! Haha! I LOVE YA SIZTA!! 

Tongues out!!! A lame pose suggested by the oh-so-lame-one, ME!!  

Uma siz, Ayla anni, Sajeetha and Me! The Happy People!!! 

Nathan bro, Ayla anni, Keegan and Dylan! Keegan looks so cute! Ha! 

My darling Dylan can finally walk!!  

I have no idea what Keegan is trying to do here! He looks like he's having some dinosaur pose! Haha! and that's Sajeetha looking in amusement! 

This is for a Bob Marley fan.. "No woman, no cry". Erm, i dun think this applies to you though! :) 

do you remember how falling in love was? most of the times, it brings back the smiles onto your face. and sometimes, it reminds you of the heartaches that you have gone through. i am rather cynical about love. rather surprising for an optimist isnt it? usually i feel rather positive about stuffs. but this is one aspect that i'm not totally negative about, but rather somewhat pessimistic about.

why do people fall in love? have you ever wondered what attracts you to a person? is it the eyes? the nicely combed hair or the dishevelled hairstyle? the cheeky grin? the soothing voice? the plentiful jokes? the songs you seemed to be able to sing together? the many meaningless-yet-meaningful conversations that you have? the way your heart just seems to lit up when you see the person?

GO FIGURE!

"Can you define love in your own words?"

Love is..
the way your whole face seems to lit up when the person comes along.
the way you just can't stop having that silly little grin on your face.
the times when you feel like strangling the person, but you can't bear to do so.
the hours you can't wait to get over with so you can see the person.

Love is the lightbulb that lights you up.

Blah!! so mushy!!!!!!!
can't seem to stand it.. okay, what has gotten into me??!!!
i think i know what. that PT report that i have to hand in by wednesday morning!
yikes.. be working on that till my brain seemed to have walked off course and landed in the hot topic of love..
wow wee..


on a lighter note,
gym duty today was fun! thanks to Uz, Carolyn and frequent gym-er Yang Jianxiong!
Carolyn was pushing Uz and i to do some exercises.. wahhh.. that was painful.
oh ya, i injured my index finger while moving some weights to the rack. Carolyn couldnt be sympathetic enough. how nice?!

lunch was great!! why? coz i met up with Miss. Denise Tan!!!
that was a sudden decision. of all days, mum forced me to have lunch outside as she wasnt cooking. and since Uz and Carolyn were fasting, i obviously couldnt ask them to join me for lunch. thus calling Denise and askin if she was busy. Of all luck, she was sleepin at home. Fated, it has to be fated! Haha! Usually she would be busy on a weekend, but somehow today she wasnt. There, its fate! Haha!
So we met!
Wow the coffee shop opposite Deyi sec has gone thru a revamp! .. my memories has been rattled with.. the place used to be just like a normal coffee shop. now it looks like a food court. so posh, yet no happiness. at least my FAVOURITE fishball noodle uncle was there! yay! :)
so ate we did! while catching up on our lives and exchanging gossips! its always great to hang out with that girl. but i dont remember her being so lame back in sec sch. haha..
its kinda funny how we are still somewhat close. hmm.. well, life is kinda weird at times..
but still, Denise is still a fun person to be with and to have lunch with! i actually finished ALL my food!
ANNA WOULD BE SO PROUD OF ME!!

so now im all alone at home, working on the PT report. sighh.. this is exactly why i am not cut out for a fitness job. who cares about RM, % MHR and all? i don't really.
Life is about compromise!!!!! so compromise i shall!

Look out world! "Concussion" the movie, staring 'Eileen-Fann Wong's Fan' is coming to a theatre near you!  

I think i can't write well anymore. Forget about just speaking. Maybe i could give Mr.Phua Chu Kang a run for his money. If Singlishness was a descriptive word, then Sivan might equal to Singlishness. Or Sivan could be the epitome of Singlishness.

Lets try and minimize the usage of Singlish words in this entry. I shall come up with an entry that would make Mrs.Singh and Mrs.Ang proud of me. They were my English teachers back in secondary school.
So what shall i write about? I got no idea. As days go by, i am finding absolute nothing to write about. Well i do, just that somehow i couldnt find the way to write it or even type it. Like i've always said, i'm afraid one day i would ultimately lose my interest in writing. Okay, a lightbulb just went off in my head and i think i might know the reason behind the sudden lack of interest in writing.
You know, back in secondary school, we would always write letters to friends. Yes i know of people who will be thinking otherwise, but it was really fun at that time. Whether it was writing about a problem or to complain about someone or just plain nonsensical scribblings, we still wrote. And i still keep those letters. All those from my regular "writers" like Kim, Denise, Dawn, Cynthia, Michelle and so on.
SO, there goes a huge part of my letter-writing. That's one thing thats missing in poly life. Or at least in my poly life. Put away these thoughts and move on. Afterall its poly we're talking about. Grow up will you? You might say that to me. I'm kinda tired to defend my case. Objection overruled, if i must say.

Can you believe how different poly life is from secondary school? Wow.
For the umpteen time, i wish i was back in Deyi.
Shut up. If only wishes could come true. Then why would i be here right now?

Pardon me. My conscience seems to be taking over the blog.
Yes, a realization came over me the other day as i was reading through what Vanisha had tagged in my blog.
Many people hide a part of themselves from the rest of the world. Why? Because that is not the face that people want to see. You can't be yourself. So you take on the role of an imaginary "you". The "you" that people want you to be. The "you" who wears a fake smile and going on about with your life like nothing is wrong.
Why can't you be you and let me be me? Wait, take a while to comprehend this. I know its kind of tongue-twisterish. But it makes sense. At least to me it does.

I realize its difficult to be yourself.
Being "you" means being a bitch/jerk at times.
Because sometimes you have to be like that.
Nice guys finish last.

Enough ramblings okay? For now at least?

My darling Dylan is turning 1 soon! I'll be seeing him this Sunday!
Isnt that something great to look out for?!

Sometimes you just hate the world,
but you can't help but loving some of the people in that world.

There's always lotsa stuff to say but time is being a real pain and not giving me enough of itself. Or rather, i'm not using it in a better way? I guess.
My week had been trashy. But i'm better now. Thanks all. Qiuyu, Anna, Uzair, Kai. Thanks for da help with the aerobics. And also Sam, Miao, Jia Ling and Lixia. Helps to have friends like you guys. I'm sorry i couldnt form a class. U guys are first on the list if there's another class next time.




Eileen,
wow u're becoming nicer and nicer! [fine, u've always been nice!]
Thanks for the packet of apple gummy thingy and the sweet note.
Much appreciated.

Gayathri n Shalini,
life would be so damn different without u guys.
Thanks for the constant laughter and gossip!
And thanks for always remembering.

Cynthia, Shan, San & Mabel,
where u guys are, there's always madness,
there's fun, laughter and comfort too.
When are we meeting next?!

Dawn,
i miss you again!
hurry finish ur A's so we can meet!!
Dee Dee!!!

Denise,
i miss your craps and laughter!
call me out when you're havin ballet. =)

Subash & Suthev,
u boys are the nicest!
thanks for sms-ing,
chatting thru msn and phone!
and thanks for all the stories and songs and dance!
i love you lots!!

Divya,
my best 'friend'!
never failing to make me laugh!
let's gang up together to bully ur sister! opps!
get together soon yeah!

and lastly,

Sajeetha,
i know we're both busy,
but that hasnt stopped me from constantly thinkin of you!
i miss you like hell! :)
i dunno why, but whenever i'm down,
thinkin of you comforts me in a way.
so thank you for that.
-smile




to everyone else that i had missed out on,
blame my head and not my heart.

Presenting... the Funny Faces of Sivan and Christina!! And that's Uzair's peace sign.. well half of it actually! 

Its kinda funny how my blog is always the platform to embarrass Eileen. Its coincidental! Not done on purpose! Haha! Doesnt this girl look lost?! Well, strangely lost lah! Die, she's gonna strangle me when she sees this!!!