12/13/20

 Even with so much being canceled this year, the girls got to have their violin Christmas concert (in a church gym)! Though our performance was a bit scary with only a couple of weeks to prepare, it was so nice having Christmas music to work on--I've missed choir a lot this year! We've had fun birthday celebrations with Emily's 19th last Friday, and Jane turning 7 this Friday.  I had a sushi lunch w/ Emily and then a birthday meatball dinner & cheesecake on Sunday when Brent & Breely could join us.  I took Jane for a Happy Meal lunch on her day, and we had pizza before the violin concert for her birthday dinner.  She also requested a Husky cake for dessert (!?!)--which I tried, but without the surprise of Nerds spilling from the inside (where is Emily when I need her?)--I think these kids are watching too many baking shows! Emily headed back down to Provo Wed night to finish up her classes and finals (though everything is online until Jan).

I appreciate Pres. Nelson's challenge to be looking for gratitude in our lives.  It has helped me to see little moments, like Jane peacefully offering her seat to Seth at the (too long for a 1 year old) concert and showering him with love.  Even Anne & Lucy, after a hard day (week? year?) with each other, both ended up in tears as I stopped to talk to them because they both WERE trying, and really DID want to be friends.  I've also worked on RS ministering interviews over the phone the last couple of weeks, which has been more of a blessing than I expected.  Much more than making sure people are looking out for each other, almost everyone I talk to is hungry for conversation and connection (mostly me!), and just realizing how universal struggles are makes everything SO MUCH LESS LONELY!!!! 

In other Christmas celebrations, we had youtube cooking classes for a RS activity (and as the youngest member of the presidency and activity committee, I was over posting said videos, haha), we're having a virtual ward party--a video filming everyone waving from their yards, a few musical #'s and messages, and instead of treats, the bishopric dropped off a ham to every family!! Brian and I found a little drive-through Nativity in Bear River City for our date night Friday, and while our expectations were low, it was sweetly impressive!--with radio narration and music, live animals (of course!) and well-lit displays! Go rural living!

  There are still few eating options in rural towns, bad messups at concerts, Seth might've tipped over a huge stack of metal folding chairs (luckily it was during applause), the kids still fight and don't clean up all the way, and it's all a bit exhausting at times, but there are a lot of great moments, and we have so so much to be grateful for! I love all of the service opportunities at Christmas time that also remind me how abundant our little lives are.  I'm just SO much happier when I'm turned outward than in!!--which is sometimes hard, because the laundry still needs washing, the house is better when there's some order, and the kids need a good deal of time and attention in their lives, but all that stuff is NEVER done and never brings the same happiness as caring for others! (And I only need to be reminded of this every other day!) 

Merry Christmastime to all of you! Love, Char/Mom

Pictures: Brian replaced our kitchen faucet!!!--Hooray for no more leaking!!/ first (sticking) snow, and Seth has started the funniest squinty smile--I think it may be from seeing everyone in masks so often, he wants to smile more with his eyes 

11/29/20

 I LOVE the last two weeks! Getting to be with Mom all week, seeing all 5 Mildenhall families in their homes, and then coming back to have Duncan time in Idaho for Thanksgiving--it's like I got two Heaven trips back to back!! I was so worried about Seth managing all those miles, and he was so much a champ, I felt angels had to be ministering in that back seat over the 2476 miles we drove and then flew back! The family staying at home were all champs, keeping things in one piece and not complaining.  I was blown away by all the love in each of my brothers' homes, and loved the chance to be with Wayne & Loralee and Tom & Marva as well, giving me sweet perspective of future life stages.  

Seth and I (& Emily from Provo) all got home Tuesday night, so I could make rolls and apple pie Wed morning while the girls got out Christmas decorations, and we got up to Idaho Falls in time for dinner and pie Wed night.  We had a great feast on Thursday after playing games in the church gym and making gingerbread houses.  Nate and Stacey hosted the lovely meal in their new home, and it was just so great being together and being so relaxed.  We came back home Friday night, and I am still in awe of how wonderful it has been seeing so much family so close together.  I really feel like I need to do this trip every year! It was a perfect week to focus on gratitude like Pres. Nelson encouraged us, and though tired and a bit chaotic, I am really, really grateful.  One of the first (of many!) things Mom & I listened to mentioned a study on enduring happiness, where the major point was that RELATIONSHIPS are the biggest key to life satisfaction.  And focusing the last several days on relationships has reinforced that being the most important thing in life.  Love to you all!! Love, Mom, Charlotte

the chili cheese fries I thought would be so good for Seth!

guest room view from Wayne & Loralee's

out front door of Wayne & Loralee's

Seth and baby TJ

Caleb & Seth

Analisa, Sami, Anne, Breely

11/15/20

 That verse in Ether where the Brother of Jared asks, "Wilt thou suffer that we shall cross this great water in darkness?"(2:22)  is something I feel all the time.  There can be a lot of darkness on some days, and I so often cannot see how this path I'm on is supposed to be a good one.  But just like God was in the the wind sending the Jaredites TOWARDS their promised lands, and just like He touched those little best effort stones, I know, and try to remember Christ is guiding me, darkness and all.  As we were reading Monday, we concluded that God will MEET US and LEAD US (1:42-43) if we turn to Him.  It doesn't mean we won't be buried in the sea or be chastened for hours, but we'll be going in the right direction and we won't be alone.  

Last Sunday night, I had about had it.  There seemed to be endless things to do, it was our lonely week to not be at church, and after the whole weekend cooped up with the family, I felt like everyone would rather watch football or play games than do any blessed thing, and I was the crazy one trying accomplish anything ever.  I felt like so many efforts were wasted and hollow. The girls were bickering and adamant about all unfairnesses, Seth was in a clingy cold, and I was slipping into depression and discouragement. Again.  As we finally sat down to eat, Lucy slipped me this note. She not only shared an answer to prayer she had had (when she is normally so reluctant to share very much), she thanked me for starting the day off so positive when everyone else was grumpy, and how much it helped her to cheer up.

I'd totally forgotten that I'd even had a good morning! I had started with good efforts, and gotten worn out. It didn't solve every problem, but it sure was a glimmer of light in my darkness that day, and a reminder that even when my efforts seem fruitless, the trying counts!

 And now I'm getting ready to drive Mom back to GA.  I can't BELIEVE it's already been a year since she started her mission here! I've been sad more than once that my life's not been in a more stable place while she's been here, to better be able to support/be with her--hoping one day I'll be "adult" enough to begin to pay back all she's done for me! It was a darkness to me that I wasn't in a better serving place.  As chaotic as my life has remained, I just realized this last week that had Mom NOT been on this mission this year, I may very well not have seen her at all! What a light it has been, when so much has been stuck this year, to be stuck together! I'm SO grateful, that even though things didn't look a thing like anyone had planned, that we had each other in such "buried" times!

And actually, it's beginning to feel like things are settling down a bit.  At least I've had enough time to think about cleaning out drawers and closets! And in our last week of warmth, I dug out old bushes, trimmed raspberries, cleaned the garage & garden area, and even got up on the roof with our new ladder to brush out the dryer vent and repair Christmas lights.  Utah has shut down most non-essential activities, so our nights have become filled with more family time again.  The kids have done tons of sliding down the stairs on an old crib mattress and playing a non-virtual version of "Among Us" that has us finding random "task cards" taped around the house like "stack the blocks" or "make the bed."  Seth has finally mastered stairs, and still loves going outside, even in below freezing temps.  And as much as I was dreading cold weather, the coziness of turning on the fire and mugs of cocoa is making things bearable.  SO excited to see so much family over the next couple of weeks with this trip east, and then the holidays.  Love to you all!, Charlotte/Mom

Maddie and Tommy wrap

chubby Tommy fix

Anne as tall as Grandma before she left?!

time to take the gate down!