Revisiting

I'm not sure why I'm here. Looking back, I see who I was. Perhaps who I am too. Seems down at the core, I don't differ much. I've made mistakes, some I'm still consciously making. There's someone I think I should be, there's someone others think I should be, then there's someone I shouldn't be. And yet after all this, who am I? I've struggled with this for some time. Middle child syndrome? Maybe. I thought having someone who'd make me a better person existed. I got fooled into thinking that instead. I'm 30 now, and I know I'm no where near where I should be. Where I think I should be. 

30 is almost half my lifespan. I know this, remind myself so often, yet I'm still doing nothing about it. Since... when I started this blog?  Haha. Never thought I'd be talking here again. Perhaps wanted to let this out. Not that it's gonna make a difference anyway.