Daisypath Anniversary tickers

Daisypath Anniversary tickers

Thursday, September 27, 2012

My Favorite Things: L

I'm just going to jump right in because there are LOTS!!

Lucky:

My sweet boy. I sure love him. He will give me lovies and cuddles whenever I want them. And for as long as I want them. Some of his expressions crack me up! Yes, I realize that he is a dog, but I've had him since right after he was born and I'm his mommy. Therefore, I can tell when his little expression changes. He isn't the smartest, nor the most obedient, but he sure is the loviest.



Lists:

Gosh, I sure love lists. They keep me on track and help to keep me from forgetting things. In fact, I have a love of lists so much that I have a list I make each day and sometimes, there are more than one list, so I must make lists of my lists! Maren and I each have a book that is one of those "Write Your Own Biography" types and it's completely in list form. ie. "List All the Habits You've Successfully Kicked" or "List All The Memories You'd Like To Forget". It's great and totally up our alley! Lists keep me calm and sane in a world of chaos and confusion. There is nothing quite like getting to make that check beside or cross off items when you've accomplished them. Seriously, when I've completed every task on one of my lists, I feel very much like Wonder Woman or Hercules. Like I could crush diamonds in my hands, run faster than a speeding train, or lift large vehicles off babies. You know... crazy, awesome mind boggling amounts of coolness. Yea... lists are pretty much amazing.



Laura:

My Sissy Sue. Oh how I love my Laura Loo. She makes me laugh so hard. She's one of the greatest people in my life. I don't know where I'd be without her in my life. If you want to read more, I wrote a whole blog post on her and you can read HERE.



Laughing REALLY, REALLY Hard:

Who doesn't love to laugh so hard your sides hurt? So hard that you end up giving yourself a headache? So hard you can't seem to stop because the very fact that you are laughing is making you laugh harder? So hard that a little bit of pee comes out? Yea... everyone does. Don't deny it. Laughing has actually been proven to lighten your mood, increase the serotonin levels in your brain, and make you feel better about people and the world around you. Did you know that studies have shown that if you laugh really hard for 20 seconds, it gives your heart the same workout as for 3 minutes of jogging?! Isn't that amazing?! Let's come up with a diet and exercise plan with THAT in mind! Whoo!!



Leather (Mostly just the smell):

I have a Grandpa Henrie, even though he's now on the other side of the veil, who used to own a leather shop in Driggs, ID. Whenever we would go to visit him when I was a little girl, we would walk into the house and there Grandma would be in the kitchen making a fruit salad (I kid you not, every single time! That woman must have thought we really liked fruit salad or something! Anyway, I digress....) and Grandpa would be in the shop. So, after our hellos to Grandma, out to the shop I'd go to give Grandpa a love hello. You could smell the leather from 10 steps away and it was overpowering once you hit the little front porch. And there he'd be, whittling away at the most wonderful works of art that you'd ever seen. Bridles, saddles, belts, bags, you name it. If it could be made with leather, he could do it and it would turn out incredible. He was an amazing craftsman. The best part though, was that even when he left the shop, he still smelled of leather. So, now, even though Grandma and Grandpa have been gone for 23 and 16 years respectively, the smell of leather takes me back to the good old days of Grandma and Grandpa's place and how loved I felt there. And how well fed on fruit salad I was. Mmm. :)



Letters:

I LOVE to get letters in the mail. In the world of today, it is so much easier, quicker and cheaper to send off a quick text or email or ecard. Isn't it sad though that because our society has created a simpler way to do something, that we hardly ever get to experience what it's like to get a good old fashioned letter in the mail? I love them. I loved writing to missionaries when I was in my early twenties because I loved to go down to the mailbox at my apartment and find little crisp notes addressed to me from all over the world. They always came stamped from some far off place in envelopes foreign to anything I'd ever seen before. I couldn't wait to rush up to my bedroom, flop onto the bed and rip into those puppies. And maybe that's just me being all nostalgic and sentimental, but I don't care. Now, there are times when I just want to send a letter for the heck of it. So... I'm grateful that Alan has a brother in England on a mission. Yes, we email each week, but I am going to send him letters through "post" anyway, just because.



Lighthouses:

This is one of those symbolic things where I look at a lighthouse and see something else entirely in my mind. To me, lighthouses represent Christ. So, in times of trouble, in times where the waves are crashing, you can't see where to go, you could be dangerously close to peril; that is when you look for a guide, that light through the storm that can guide you safely through.



Lightening:

I really love a good thunder and lightening storm. I think they are beautiful and exciting. It was one of my favorite things to do as a child to sit out on the front porch with my dad and momma when I was little, wrapped up in a fuzzy blanket and watch a thunder and lightening storm. I never had to be scared of them because my parents were there to protect me. I plan on doing the same with my kids.



Lilacs:

My Grandma Street loved lilacs and every time I smell them, my thoughts turn to her. Each summer when the lilac bushes in my mom's front yard bloom, my thoughts instantly jump to the act of running a handful down to Shelley to her grave. She would love that. And each time I smell them, my thoughts turn to her and I instantly remember how much she loved me. What a good feeling, to be loved!



Literature/Libraries:

I have a sick obsession with books. I'll admit it. And I'm ok with it. There are worse things. I love classic literature. Don't get me wrong, I love reading a quick easy reading book too, but there are times when I really feel like I need to push myself when it comes to reading and that is when I bust out a classic novel. Something like Bronte, Austen, Dickens, etc would write. My most recent foray into classic literature was Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte and I LOVED it! One of my absolute favorites (other than pretty much every Austen novel written) is Great Expectations by Charles Dickens. Love it. And libraries... well, they are houses to books. They are temples TO books! What more needs to be said?!


Friday, September 7, 2012

Hard Days...

Gosh, you know... it's so hard sometimes to get your thoughts organized enough to formulate words and even when words DO come, it's even harder to get them out of your head in such a way as to have them make sense on the page.

The past couple of months I've either been absent from the blogosphere or I've posted and been vague, disinterested, and slightly off. Have you noticed? Maybe not... I tried not to appear so.

Here's why...

Death sucks.

It truly does.

Even when you know that someone is going to die, it still sucks. I wish there was a way that I could describe it differently, but in my current state of mind, that's what we are getting. Me... the "vernacular ninja extraordinaire" has no other words. Give you a hint as to what my brain is struggling through?

And let me be the first to tell you, I have a testimony. I have a testimony that my loved ones and I will live again through the Atoning Sacrifice of Jesus Christ and through resurrection. I KNOW this.

That doesn't make it easier when life gives way to death in someone who has not even yet fully lived.

Back at the very end of May, my sister in law was pregnant. We saw her on Memorial Day for a big BBQ and she was very glowingly pregnant with her 3rd child. A son, who name is Logan. The next morning, she went to the doctor for a regular checkup with her doctor and there was no heartbeat. She was 2 weeks from her due date.

It was a hard day.

We went to the hospital and then to the funeral. We went to the cemetery and bid farewell to a little boy who never even got to take his first breath.

It was a hard day.

It was hard because he never got to take a step, grow a tooth, lose a tooth, fall off his bike and scrape his knee, say his first word, go to school, drive a car, go on a date, have a first kiss, have a first love, play sports, go on a mission, go to college, graduate, get married, have children of his own... etc.

When you think of all the little milestones of what makes up a life, you begin to realize just how amazing it is to watch those things happen. And the sudden realization that those will not occur in this life, is hard.

It's a hard day.

Not quite a week ago, on Labor Day, I got a phone call from my mom telling me that my cousin had been killed in a car accident late the night before. My head spun, my mouth went dry and I literally lost words. The only words coming out of my mouth were "Oh my gosh" and stutters.

As my mom started to explain what had happened, my brain took it in, but didn't believe it. I couldn't fathom how Heavenly Father had taken away a girl so vibrant with life. How in a moment, she was just... gone. Then the tears came.

It was a hard day.

Since then, every time I would think of it, I would put it out of my head because I could NOT believe that it had actually happened. My mind would not wrap around this idea that she was dead. It was impossible.

My cousin is the same age as my baby sister... 18. Her birthday is tomorrow. She would have been 19. She had just gone off to college and had been in class for a week. She came home to celebrate the long weekend, went out with friends and never came back.

And I suppose that the lessons we must all take from this horrific tragedy are not getting into a car when you know someone had been drinking, even if it had been several hours and he'd only "had one drink". Or maybe it's to ALWAYS wear your seat belt. Or maybe it's to be grateful for even the almost 19 years we got to have with her, even though it seems like too short of a time. Or, maybe it's something else all together. Those are just the obvious ones in a situation that seems so completely senseless. I don't know right now. I just know that she's gone.

She will never again come bounding through the door of Grandma JoAnn's with her megawatt grin and sassy attitude to take part in the annual pumpkin carving or Easter egg hunt. She will never again come take part in birthday parties, baptism luncheons, bridal showers, etc. She will never again be seen at weddings, baptisms, funerals, etc. The veil has been drawn and we cannot see her there.

But....

She will be there in spirit. I know this. With every fiber of my being, I KNOW that our loved ones are never completely lost from us. Just hidden from our sight for a time.

So why, today at her funeral, was it so hard? Why do we all gather in hoards to say good bye? She is not got forever, just gone for awhile.

In the meantime, we miss her. We mourn for her. And as we do so, our minds turn again to the things that will never be on this earth for her. Graduating college, getting married, having a baby, etc. Things that are major milestones in anyone's life. They are major for those around you who care about you too. Watching those things happen for your family members and friends, and sharing in their joy, is also what makes life so grand.

And instead, today, we watched Keely take her last ride as her casket was pulled gently around the cemetery in a horse drawn hearse carriage with her own two horses following after. And while it wasn't a joyous occasion, it was still momentous. I'm grateful I got to be there for it.

It's been a hard day.

And though I still cling to my faith that I will see Keely and Logan again, it's hard to think about all the things you feel like you're going to miss watching. The birthdays, the weddings, the simple everyday things that make a life a life.

My prayer is that when I look back in 20 years, I will be able to say "oh wow. See how fast time has gone? I've missed them, sure. But, I can do this. I've got this. What's another 20? It will be ok."

Comfort and peace will be given through that ultimate comforter, Jesus Christ, who not only atoned for our sins, but also for our sorrows. He knows this pain and can help bear it. That is how I plan to get through the next 20 years. And if I have a plan, the hard day doesn't seem so hard. I have a Savior who loves me and will help me get through it. Come what may, I can do it.

Here is Keely's Obituary:

http://eckersellfuneralhome.com/fh/obituaries/obituary.cfm?o_id=1576382&fh_id=12591