Omerta

nothings helping
not the finals
not jyc
not haka
not kicking
not running
not dep
nothing
maybe cept band
could listen to them
for the rest of my life

how..fitting
persian overture
right on the day
i see someone
and then run
and run
like that american chap
in the persian overture
i wonder where im headed

memories fail
i tell myself
ka ora
i tell myself
ka upa
i tell myself
the best is yet to be
it doesnt help
not
one
bit
even the
word
acs
is slowly losing its
inspirational grip over me



10aug

posted by S @ Saturday, July 31, 2004 0 comments

what a screw up
whatt a screw up
its on days like these
i wish i was still in rugby
cant believe
i can be
SO
messed up
in a debate
that ive
seen
and
DONE
COUNTLESS times
how sucky
felt like hitting a pad
smacking something
sigh
sigh
sigh
the one thing i was
LOOKING FORWARD TO
throughout
keith tans
sucky periods
mdm khngs drop dead BORING
classes
frentic HMT with ling hui
thats was ONE thing
i was looking forward to
and well yeah
how nice.
dep tomorrow.
journal not completed.
yes yes.
mayhaps i shall injure myself tmrw morning
give me another week at least.
sigh
another crapped out week
cant wait for the 10th
anyone want to go sentosa then?
didnt think so.

 

 

not head over heels anymore

posted by S @ Friday, July 30, 2004 0 comments

anyone want to go to sentosa on the 10th of aug?

oops..last entry..didnt mean it to be that way..apologies to anyone i might have offended...its not what u think it means..

posted by S @ Thursday, July 29, 2004 0 comments

grief
what a week its been
what a week
 
sec threes
....man...
WE"RE PROUD OF YOU
yes!
even though u didnt win...
two words...
SO WHAT??
you guys STILL rock
and you guys WILL
destroy in the JG's
im SURE of it!
yeargh! kiarite s3s!
ka upa!
 
 
RUGBY SEMI FINALS TOMORROW
ARGHH
go ruggers
justin
ian
alex
sankaran
woohoo
u guys have come this far
go take on barker and go on to the finals man!
 
 
spar this friday.
mgs y14 team..
hmm
after this fri..
there will be none
(you all get me)
lets go for the goal guys
all the way!
*up and on*
 
 
haha
its been an ok week i guess
ho hum
 
why oh why
do i long for you
when you're but an impossibility?
*longer versions in my math textbook*
and ILLOGICAL ANOMALY
thats what it is.
yeep
oh well
 
 
 
 
 
tempora mores
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

posted by S @ Monday, July 26, 2004 0 comments

friendly faces in the crowd dwindle
as the ground rushes up to my face
and down
down down
i go
further down that pit
deeper into that mess
on my knees
bowed
bowed to pressure
others dont succumb to
keeled
destroyed
by derisive laughter
from cold faces
and yet colder hearts
and i think of that night
think of that final
think of that flag
the red blue gold beaming down on me
of those few voices still screaming my name
of those few hearts still beating for me
think of that fire and passion
that desire
of that hate
that love
that anger
that peace
and suddenly
blank
theres nothing left
except
me
emptiness all around
vast desolation
just me
above everything
seeing yet not understanding
hearing yet not comprehending
hanging there
susepended
limbo
and how wonderful
it would be
at that moment
above everything
just watching
waiting
ever patient
ever emotionless
only to crash down again
back to mortality
back to reality
where i have fears to face
faults to correct
work to do
objectives to complete
so
much
its hard to see the big picture
 
down on bended knee
succumbing to
myself.
courage
loyalty
passion
love
hope
faith
peace
all gone now
residue remains
starting from the try line
having to work my way all the way
to the other end of the pitch
into the enemy's half
across the line
for the goal
 and fight i will
struggle i must
for what?
i
know
not
perhaps that will be my
greatest hindrance
but for now
i fight a blind fight
a wild flurry of determination
carrying me as far as i can.
and then.
we'll see.
 
 
 
blank
 

posted by S @ Tuesday, July 20, 2004 0 comments

sad
mess
 
i wonder if murphy's law in reverse works
anything that can go right will go right?
i wonder
will things always get better eventually?
im sure theres a universal law out there
somewhere
there has to be..
has to be..
 
 
 
crouch, hold, engage

posted by S @ Tuesday, July 20, 2004 0 comments

wannabe me 

posted by S @ Monday, July 19, 2004 0 comments

clarification
im gonna stop caring about what happens
 
question
who is --
 
statement
kiarite

posted by S @ Sunday, July 18, 2004 0 comments

well
its alll over
all over
yeah
the paradigm has shifted properly
what was supposed to swing to
the other extreme
stopped
right in
the middle
leaving me nowhere
nowhere at all
belonging neither here or there
perhaps i was a bit rash
or harsh
but i was scared
and i make no apologies
cos in retrospect
i see no wrong
 
i remember the time
i was practically shoutin
at dad
insisting that he didnt trust me
he didnt trust me
to type his email
to do his online work
to check somethin about the house
he didnt trust me
it was so logical
he tried to argue back
said that i might have seen things wrong
and i went on and on
proving the links
until he said
maybe you see things differently
and at that exact same moment
i realise i did make a mistake
in what i was doing for him
a mistake that would have
had dire consequences
if he had not pointed it out
trust.
is.
manifold.
 
anyway
i dont care
ive made my stand
if things dont turn out alright?
oh well
ill just move along
go somewhere else
or just stay with the musks
or ill just turn to another group
my teammates perhaps?
yeah
i guess
 
paul, john, adriel, jacob, josh
5 people
how..
poignant
 
ive given up on caring
its easier that way
so
enough of that wishy washy
nonsense
its back to
the rugby ball
the debate floor
and above all
acsi
and not
that other place
that i go to.
for now.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 do it ala stefan
 
 
 
 

posted by S @ Sunday, July 18, 2004 0 comments

did it ever occur to you
that
you shouldnt know?
did it ever occur to you
how you would have reacted in
HER
situation?
a secret told is meant to be a secret kept
its not about whether she trusts you
or not
its about honour
its about
keeping a promise
how would you have
liked to be in her situation?
where if you dont tell
youre ostracised by her closest friends?
but if you do
you betray the trust of a confidant?
would you have liked to be caught
in that awful dilemna?
do unto others
what you want
others to do unto you
spare a thought
for your friend
and her confidant
you could be the most
trusted friend of hers
but that doesnt
give
any
reason
for
betrayal
and you know what?
if someones secret is let out
guess who he'll be angry at?
not only that person
but
the
people around her
who forced her into it.
think about that
before you go any further
think
think well
think hard
think.
 
 
 
uncharacteristic obviousness

posted by S @ Saturday, July 17, 2004 0 comments

swimming finals today
reclaimed b
reheld c
WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS
haha
cheering was great
specially to the end
crazy swimmers
and koping RI's cheer
cutting into their
announcment with
" WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS"
woohoo
go ac!



acsi/acjc/mgs

posted by S @ Wednesday, July 14, 2004 0 comments

today was a brilliant day
just brilliant
we were drowning out raffles as usual
then rgs turned up
so it was pretty much equal
and then RJC turned up too
so we were on the losing end
BUT..
BUT
the good gents and ladies at RJC
provided us with some hearty entertainment..
by
hanging their sch flag
on a pole..
UPSIDE DOWN
haha
quite brilliant!
(no offence rafflesians)
;)

voiceless

posted by S @ Tuesday, July 13, 2004 0 comments

nuff said 

posted by S @ Monday, July 12, 2004 0 comments

swimming finals tomorrow
that means more cheering
ahah
yeahh
time to roll
cant wait




hate to love her

posted by S @ Monday, July 12, 2004 0 comments

all for one and one for all 

posted by S @ Sunday, July 11, 2004 2 comments

i shall give up on it
its so silly anyway
guess youre right jie
argh
my fingers are bleeding




wish against logic

posted by S @ Sunday, July 11, 2004 0 comments

lets add
brilliant
smart
witty
funny
and hopelessly out of reach
to the list shall we?

christine- horror stories about YOUR SEC ONES! yeah, haha. btw, i dont like ur coach! not at all!

yk- ITS NOT HER LAH REALLY


sent out emails to every club on the sru
hope i get a reply
if not..
time to call.

posted by S @ Thursday, July 08, 2004 0 comments

youre ever so pretty
youre ever so charming
youre ever so sweet
youre ever so happy
youre ever so helpful
youre ever so caring
youre ever so kind
youre so much older

as such i determine it is an impossibility.
and i shall throw this daydream away

things arent heating up
not much things going on for the s2s
trained the s1s today
ok i guess
hope theyll retain the y14
then again
after the 'horror' stories
ive been hearing bt mg
i doubt it0

another thrashing by the ruggers
pity i didnt catch it
81-0 i think
at 41 minutes to boot
haha
keep on rolling guys





rolling his greedy eyeballs about his head

posted by S @ Wednesday, July 07, 2004 0 comments

friday 5pm
acsi vs pioneer
c div rugby

score
well
i have no idea what
but it was a major thrashing
cant say it was awesome
but it was good
yeah
i mean
justins beautiful try
after sidestepping two of em
and draggin em across the line
alex's pick and runs
gained quite a fair bit of ground
paul ongs catch
followed by a run to the tryline
haha
grats guys
oh
and you too ian ;)
ill try to watch your tuesday match
keep it up!

ac rugby

posted by S @ Saturday, July 03, 2004 0 comments

havent blogged in ages..

well
heres a big shoutout
to all the ac ruggers
specially to
paul ong
justin
ian
alex
sankaran
yeah
guess i wish i could be in your shoes tomorrow
but i chose another path
anyway
ill be on the sidelines
bring us back our first rugby gold!

sigh
never thought
what i did
could be so devastating
so many consequences
what i felt
so..
useless
pathetic really
i still long for her
yet.. i played along
with you
what a fool
now things are all bad
well
well
well

hey jude refrain
dont carry the world
upon your shoulders
and well
you know its a fool
who plays it cool
by making his world a little colder

haha
ill go back to blacks this sun
look see

sigh
how..bothersome
no one nearby
no one close
no one with me
its just me
the guitar
the rugby ball
and my debate book



though i wish it wasnt always so.
ahah
useless


experiment by faith

posted by S @ Thursday, July 01, 2004 0 comments