come aboard... we're expecting you... (**)

There was a 2-hour period yesterday when my wife and I were seriously considering booking a Royal Carribbean cruise for the middle of January. Thankfully, the insanity was only temporary. We're thinking maybe July, instead.


PS... as a kid who was a band nerd in school during the late 70's and early 80's, I played the theme from The Love Boat in band. I still preferentially focus on the trumpet fills between the lyrics when I listen to the song.

a series of short declarative sentences...

I didn't go ice skating. I didn't buy a cymbal. I finished my grades. I played PS2 until 1:00 AM. I am very tired. I have a cold.

is it getting cold in here, or is it just me...?

Ok, it was a great topic for a final thermodynamics paper, but after grading 5 of them, I'm officially tired of reading about "How Refrigerators Work".

more days like this....

I'm at the café, as I have grading still to do. (Some readers seemed to get the impression that I was done... I'm only done with the EXAMS.) I was supposed to do this YESTERDAY, but the wife was sick and in bed most of the day, leaving me with a kids-all-day headache. It hasn't quite gone away. I think I'm getting sick too... I've got that throat-omen feeling.

On the bright side, we've had 2 days of rain and 40+ temperatures, so I walked out the front door and saw LAWN for the first time in a month. It feels like springtime. Of course we're going to ruin that by going ice-skating this afternoon. Don't even fucking ask. If everything goes as planned I'm sure my next blog post will include a full account of my broken hip.

Off to grade for now. If I finish everything but the term papers, I'm stopping at the music store on the way home and rewarding myself with a splash cymbal for my new drumkit.

what is it now... the FOURTH day of Xmas...??

That would explain the "four imposing relatives."

Still no time for a proper update, faithful readers... things have yet to let up around here. Today I'm heading into the city with my brother and his fianceé, while the wife holds down the fort here with my Mom and her roommate.

I'm looking forward to today NOT AT ALL, as nobody seems to know what they want to do besides "walk around the city". Yay. You know... Manhattan isn't just a big fucking shopping mall... there are museums and stuff there. And I know for a FACT that there are Starbucks back in Baltimore.

Anyway, my brother bought me a drumset for Xmas, so I probably should just grin and bear it.

... just like the ones i used to know...

Where treetops glisten? (check)
And children listen? (yeah... right...)

Merry Christmas, readers.

the dr. dave code...

I've always meant to compile a list of the marks I use while grading papers, so that students can understand the subtle shades of meaning that I attach to them. Today, in order to procrastinate, and to fill my weblog with more grading-related fun, I have decided to finally create this long awaited list...

COMMON GRADING MARKS

good - Correct and complete answer.
(check) - Good enough answer for full credit.
Exc! - Very well-phrased, more-than-complete answer.
OK - This could probably be phrased better, but I'm giving you pretty much full credit
NQ - Almost right, but "not quite".
? - This could be right, but is unclear.
?? - What you've written doesn't make sense to me, and is pretty clear that it's wrong.
?! - This is wrong in a particularly weird and surprising way.
Yes - This part of your answer is correct. Usually followed by...
NO! - This is very wrong. (The more exclamation points, the wronger it is.)
EEK! - This is wrong in a way which disturbs and/or depresses me.
So...? - You have made a correct statement, but have stopped short of actually answering the question.
! - You have said something in a particularly interesting way. This is often a good thing, but not always.
YES!! - You got this right, and many people up to now have been getting it wrong.
Wow! - You have said something particularly insightful that blows me away. (I don't get to use this one that often.)

PS> anyway... mission accomplished... home with all exams graded by 11:44.

grading update...

God this sucks. the first three papers I graded had scores of 100%, 100% (with extra credit bonus question), and 37%.

Things have leveled out a bit since then, but there is still a big gulf between the very high A's and the very low B's. Someone get an 87, please. A few C's would make me feel better too.

grading, day 2...

Well, the last time I got all my Astro exams done. Today it's physics. It's a smaller class, but a longer exam, so... it may just even out. I'm back at the café, a little earlier this time... I intend to get a quicker start on grading. I don't have any blogs pulled up on the laptop, cuz I read everything last night, and there wasn't much new this morning. Probably a good thing...

uh.

did my monitor just flicker?

please tell me my laptop screen is not fucking flickering.

didn't I have a laptop die the week of Christmas before???

it seems to have stopped. maybe it was a trick of the light or something. i do NOT fucking need that.

Anyway, as I was saying... it's probably a good thing that I don't have to much time-wastey stuff with me today. The house is a wreck and there is much Xmas preparedness that needs taking care of, so... I should try to get this done well before noon and get back home. Not that I really WANT to go home and wade through the crap there and try to get it put into decent shape by Sunday, but... I hate having Xmas in a messy house. Probably some sick thing my Mom implanted in my brain.

Anyway.

(sip)

The Boy seems fine this morning, so we sent him to school. We're pretty sure it's one of those Two-Pukes-And-You're-Done stomach things, so we don't feel TOO guilty about it. Luckily he isn't old enough to know to try and leverage his illness into a day off school. We need this last No-Kids-Day before the holiday weekend.

Looks like the transit strike is essentially over. Thing is... I kinda wished it would have lasted a few more days, since my crazy wife made plans with some friends on Long ISland to meet in NYC on the 26th. Of December. As in, the day after Xmas. Which is just sacrilege to me. The day after Xmas is for sitting around in your pajamas all day and fucking around with your presents and throwing away wrapping paper... not for trekking into Manhattan. I was hoping the transit strike would cancel our plans. Oh well. Maybe someone else will be projectile vomiting by then.

Ok... off to grade.

i forget...

On WHICH day of Christmas does my true love send to me - One Projectile Vomiting Toddler?

santa's devious little elves...

The Boy has been asking for a "big astronaut toy" for Xmas. We've run into this problem before... it is actually surprisingly difficult to find space and astronaut toys short of a science museum gift shop. And what with the transit strike in NYC, I was unable to get to the Museum of Natural History this week as planned. So we looked at various toystores... but... no dice.

Then today at KayBee, I came across this very cool looking Fantastic Four Ben Grimm astronaut figure with "face-changing action". Meaning what? Meaning that you push the button on the back of this (very cool looking) astronaut figure and his human face spins around transforming into The Thing. Bleah. The Boy would NOT like the scary Thing face. So...?

So, I bought it for $7.99, took it home, opened it, took a hacksaw, cut off the button on the back, filled the hole with glue, and... viola! One very cool astronaut figure... sans changing face!

Oh yeah, I threw away the big "space cannon" too.

xmas woes partially solved...

The wife's gift-card redeeming scheme at Sharper Image was exposed, so she had to cancel her recent order. Thus I immediately rushed to the phone and ordered her a 2Gb iPod Nano, which will arrive in time for Xmas.

Yay for Apple.

from the corner table...

Ok, this was the deal... I preload my blogs and email, drop off the Boy at daycare, head to the cafe, order a full pot of Darjeeling, read my blogs, write one short post, and get to work.

So... I'm at that next-to-last part.

These corner tables are cozy, but maybe not so good for grading. Too dark. The tea is good, but I let it steep a little too long. I feel somewhat ready to grade, but a little *bleah* about it as always. Still... the mountain of papers is high. The time for procrastinating is passed. There may come a day when the courage of men shall fail... but it is not this day! Sorry... I got a little Tolkeinesque there for a moment.

Maybe I'll move over by the fireplace.

I really should do some SHOPPING today. I need more stuff for the wife, and I don't know when I'm going to get another chance. Ugh. It's gonna be a lame Xmas, and I just found out my daughter TOLD my wife about the fucking coffee machine, so... there goes the one fucking decent gift I had.

Sigh.

I celebrated the end of the semester last night with a Jim Beam and Pepsi, which was yummy but perhaps ill-advised on a fairly empty stomach. I went to bed somewhat woozily at 11:00. Slept well, though. Note to self... just because the name of the liquor always comes first in a mixed drink doesn't mean you should use more of it than the mixer.

I can't believe Xmas is in 4 days. I can't believe I have to teach three classes next semester, and only have 3 weeks to prepare. Actually, I'm teaching three and a HALF classes... there's one team-taught course that I'm on the team for. I plan on telling my Astronomy class straight up... Ok, guys... I'm teaching three classes this term, and when I teach three classes, ONE class always loses when it comes to my general preparedness and attention... This semester it will be YOU. Get used to it. The good news is that sometimes my best lectures come when I'm completely unprepared and talking off the top of my head. The bad news is that so do some of the worst. My advice to you? Tangents are your friend. The further afield the better. They are always more interesting than the real course material. Make a game out of it. Try to get me to talk about black holes at least once a class. You'll have fun, and I'll always have more to talk about than I can fit into 1h 40min.

Crap, it's almost 10:30.

Ok. Grading... now... really...

things I learned about Hoboken...

* The PATH train takes a while, but probably no longer than the walk+subway ride to Penn.
* The Hoboken terminal is much cooler and and historical-looking than either Penn Station or Secaucus Junction. It's very "Platform 9 3/4".
* There are more places to sit and wait here than at Secaucus.
* There is an awesome little Thai food stand here where I just got a big heap of rice and curry chicken for 3 bucks. There is also pizza.
* There is a bar. Not today I didn't, but...
* Since it's the end of the line, the trains just SIT here and you can board them early, get your seat and get comfy.
* Have I mentioned that this would save me $50 a month? And that I'm an idiot?

travels and travails...

I felt a little lame for not having an exciting and daring travel story to share with my coworkers today. I didn't have to walk across a bridge or share a van with strangers or swing Spiderman-like from the rooftops or anything.

Most of my students seemed to manage to find their way to class one way or another. So, my finals are done and many days of grading await. Our science faculty meeting is cancelled tomorrow, which means as far as the strike goes, as long as it's over before January 24, I really don't give a subway-rat's ass. I'm outta here!

mess transit...

I was going to start this post by saying "Well, at least the TRAINS aren't affected by the strike..." but, well... I just spent 40 minutes sitting at my station listening to cancellation notices until finally an emppy train hobbled up to the platform, paused, then drove away without opening its doors. "Mechanical difficulties", they say. Riiiight.

Anyway, I'm on a train now which is carrying the past three trainloads of passengers. It's pretty full already, and I live near the end of the line. I expect to be squished fairly soon. I have my fingers crossed for a "petite" seat-mate.

And, as you may know, I'm headed for a city which I expect to find in utter chaos due to the transit strike. It should be an interesting day. I'm debating how to get to work... do I take the Secaucus trains or the PATH? I expect both will be crowded. At least the PATH puts me close to work and gives me less of a walk. I hate to try something NEW on a day like today, though.

Meanwhilst, I have an astronomy exam to write. I'm sure I can get it done by noon... the question is... will anybody be there to take it? I told them that no matter where they live, if they start walking at 8:00, they should be able to make it.

Anyway... off to read my websites and write my exam. Updates galore to follow.


(PS... not just "petite" but "petite" with leather pants!! I knew something good had to come out of this day.)

...

Hosting two parties in two days has drained me of my will to LIVE, much less blog. You may have to wait until tomorrow for a substantive update.

back when atoms were cool, daddy-o...

Last night I discovered the website archive.org and it's curious depository of all things public domain. The most remarkable find has to be the huge stockpile of short films from the 1950's... particularly the science films. Wow. These are going to get some serious mileage in my science classes... movies about X-rays and satellites and the wonder of "stereophonic sound". But the best has got to be "A is for Atom". Not only is all of the animation just... sublimely vintage, but content-wise... the thing is actually pretty fucking well done. There is no way I'm ever teaching about nuclear isotopes again without showing this film. I encourage everyone to go there and poke around in the collection. (And if you stumble upon the one about "springs"... well... prepare to be utterly perplexed.)

i'm just going to let myself believe...

... that the little "-" symbol on the LCD doesn't mean what I think it might mean, lest I be led to the conclusion that the receiver end of our indoor-outdoor digital thermometer is somehow picking up signals from fucking Wisconsin, because there is no way it was NEGATIVE SIX fucking degrees this morning!!

I'm just going to stop complaining about the temperature, because every day I do, it's fucking 5º-10º COLDER the next morning.

a man, a plan...

I double-clicked on OmniOutliner (my new favorite program in which to pretend I'm doing "work") yesterday, and proceeded to construct a list of all of the professional projects that I'm currently planning/working on/neglecting. I thought it would be a good first step towards being more productive in January (and beyond) but once I finished the list, my reaction was simply... "Holy fuck, how am I going to do all of this??" The problem is... there is so much short-term stuff that I can't even imagine when the long-term stuff will rise to the surface.

Anyway, just to give myself a feeling of accomplishment, I tackled one item right away... The Play. I got an email from my collaborator a few weeks ago informing me that he was pursuing another rewrite commission. So I emailed him to let him know that I was still interested in keeping involved and providing input on the manuscript as it evolves... basically so I can claim credit in my professional portfolio for someone else's work. I was up front about that. He seems fine with it.

He also informed me that not only is the Foundation seriously considering an extension of our grant (which would mean a couple hundred bucks for me) but that a small but well-regarded theatre in the Hamptons (with whom he has worked before) is interested in seeing the new draft to evaluate it for a possible production. So... what are you doing this summer Dave?" "Well, you know... same old stuff... working on my classes... vacation with the family... oh, yeah... and I'll be heading out to the Hamptons for the premiere of my play."

Take THAT, lackluster-profesisonal-portfolio!

As a result of the possible renewed interest in The Play, I'm also planning on registering the domain name www.the-name-of-our-play.com and putting up a small informational website with some excerpts and some links and some essays that I've written about the main character. It will look nice, it will get a few hundred hits every time somebody searches for this obscure figure in the history of science... and it will be a "significant contribution to the field" in the language of our university's expectations for professional output.

That's the plan anyway... we'll see if anyone is fooled.

it's "vermin fresh"...!

For the past few days, while waiting for my subway train and staring down at the tracks I've noticed a single piece of Altoids "Curiously Strong Chewing Gum" lying down there between the rails. I'm a big Altoids fan, so I know it when I see it. Today when I stood in my usual spot and looked down at the tracks, it was gone. I can't be sure, but I strongly suspect that today, somewhere deep beneath the streets of Manhattan, lurks a "Curiously Minty Rat".

three. fucking. degrees...

And I get on the train and all the good seats (far from doors, close to heating ducts) are taken, so I'm sitting right next to the doors, and under some kind of air-recirculation vents blowing COLD fucking air. I'm thinking of starting up Photoshop just to heat up my laptop.

So, the end is near. Three more classes, not counting the 2 finals. A review in Physics today, a lecture on extraterrestrial life in Astronomy, an Astro review on Thursday and that's all for the "teaching" part. A couple of exams, a big mountain of grading, and I'll be clear for the month of January.

Not that there isn't plenty to do during January. I need to convince my wife of this. She seems to be under the impression that Winter and Summer breaks are "vacation" time, as opposed to time that I'm supposed to be developing new courses and publishing papers and working on some kind of research. She'll claim to understand this distinction, but when it comes down to it, she's expecting me to clean and paint and fix shit. And yes there will be some time for that, as a result of having a schedule that is flexible, but really... I HAVE FUCKING WORK TO DO!! So I've already told her that on December 30th, we are sitting down with a big sheet of paper and scheduling the month of January... day by day, hour by hour, just like we did when I was unemployed. That way we'll both get time for all the "stuff" we think we want to accomplish, and we won't sit around in our pajamas all day watching 4 Netflix movies a week.

I'm actually starting to get more than a little freaked out by the whole "research agenda" business. It's starting to look more and more like we'll be expected to produce something a lot more serious in terms of published research than we've been led to expect all along. And maybe not technical scientific research, but at least "education research" (which I personally believe is a load of crap) or some kind of "significant contribution to the field". The thing is... I'm not even sure what my field IS any more. It is physics? Education? History of science? These are all things I DO, but none of them are really fields in which I'm poised to make a "contribution." What I consider my professional program is the creation and distribution of new curriculum materials and new approaches to science teaching for non-scientists. So... what "counts"? A couple articles in "The Physics Teacher?" The creation of a popular online resource? A book? A play?!

There is no kind of clarity AT ALL from the administration, because there is nobody "above us" who understands science, or more importantly - who understands the limitations on doing "real science" at an institution like this one. I'm just worried that I'll spend a year or two working on the projects that interest me the most and then find out that none of it counts for anything when my 3-year review comes along.

Anyway... I have plenty of other things to stress about right now, but this is something that's been in the back of my head lately, and pretty soon it's going to come to the FRONT of my head and I'll probably wind up in a panic of sorts. Maybe I'll add it to my list of "Things That Need To Be Done In January"...

* Plan a whole new course on acoustics
* Assemble a course reader for History of Astronomy
* At least perform some token planning for my Modern Physics course
* Order lab equipment for new courses
* Assist with the planning of the new team-taught course.
* Create a poster for a colleague's conference presentation.
* Assemble the skeleton of a departmental curriculum website
* Have at least one manuscript ready for submission/publication

Oy... what the fuck am I supposed to be painting again?

and the coroner's report will read "cause of death - three day weekend"...

I can't deal with the kids anymore. A weekend is enough for me. Add a snow day to the front of that and I swear, I'm ready to kill somebody. They make me nuts. It never stops... the yelling and the arguing and the whining and the tantrums... FUCK!

So today I'm taking some quiet time to sit in my newly-discovered cafe and sip some tea and grade some papers. Nothing like 3 days with the kids to make grading seem like a fucking TREAT. Anyway, I should really not spend too much time blogging. Just enough to have some quiet time. (At least they don't have internet access.)

I'll also mention that I finally got my first review on "ratemyprofessor.com"... a positive one, of course. No "chili peppers" though... sigh. Maybe someday. And it's not like I wouldn't rather be considered a good professor than a "hot" professor, but... you know... just once? Would be nice.

Lastly I'll mention that the incredibly hot "Danni" won Survivor last night, which was cool. Although my wife and I were both kinda pulling for Rafe. At least StephEnie didn't win. We hatess her. The funny thing about Danni was, she showed up at the finale/reunion thing wearing all this makeup with her hair all done, and I honestly think she looked a hundred times better all sweaty and jungle-y and natural. She's got that Gina Gershon lip-curl thing going on that no amount of lipsticking can improve upon. (Although it was nice to see she'd put a couple of pounds back on... she was getting a bit of a Dachau look by the end.)

Ok, fuck... it's time to put this down. Must work.

the plastic supper...

When I visited my brother last month, he mentioned that he was looking for certain works of religious art to decorate his office at The Vicarage...

This is just a prototype, of course (click to enlarge)...



I hope to have the final version shot and framed by Xmas.

whose idea was it to go sleeding today...?

MINE!! I plead temporarty insanity.

Fuck, my ankles hurt.

it finally stopped...

Just shy of a foot in the end (11.5" according to the yardstick on the back deck.) Shoveled the driveway, then the snowplow covered over the bottom 4 feet again. I'm taking a break, needless to say.

Have I mentioned before that I'm not particularly fond of the snow?

humbug...

6" + of snow already. friday is my day to stay home and get things done while the kids are at school. instead i'lll be shoveling snow and sledding and dealing with kids all day. and i know i should make of point of ENJOYING things like that, but... fuck... this week? i really can't afford to lose a whole day like this.

to science or not to science...

I've been thinking a lot lately about the relative lack of science-related stuff in this blog, and whether that's ok. I mean... it has the sciencey NAME, and much of my online identity is wrapped up in the "professor" persona, but I don't really talk all that much about what I do. Then again, purely topical blogs tend to bore me, so... I'm sure there is some kind of appropriate balance. Next year I'll be teaching a new course on the nature of science... I imagine it will spawn more reflective essays on science and the teaching of science. Maybe I should institute a "Science Friday" or something. Or rather, "Science Monday", since the other name is already taken by NPR and that chucklehead Ira Flatow.

eleven point three...

... degrees, that is. At least according to the digital thermometer, that's how cold it was this morning. Now, I know it's cold in the winter, and as much as I dislike the cold, I try to deal with it. But I don't want to be seeing and single fucking digits, people... and 11.3º is getting WAY too fucking close. As a result I've decided to adopt the Kelvin temperature system for the remainder of the season. It may not make any difference to the actual weather, but when somebody asks me about the weather I can say... "Why, it's 261 degrees!! Which is nowhere NEAR Absolute Zero!!". I imagine it will make me feel somewhat better.

Speaking of absolute zero... I was teaching about the concept in physics class the other day, and it occurred to me (after-the-fact) that I need to assemble a presentation on the topic, and that the first slide needs to be a mock vodka ad. ("Absolut Zero") Even if it's already been done... I bet their ad didn't feature a picture of Lord Kelvin.

it's ALIVE...!

Few things in this world give me more pleasure than resurrecting an old Mac from beyond the grave. I recently came across a Powerbook gathering dust in a drawer in the science lab... one of the old black curvy ones. First generation G3. I tried to turn it on... nothing... probably a dead battery... no surprise there. I rooted through the drawer and found the power cable, and its end was frayed and dangling from a thin thread of wire insulation. That would explain the dead battery. I asked someone about it and was told that a new power cord cost almost $100, and it was kind of an old computer, so nobody thought it was worth it to buy a new one.

Come ON, people...

One wire cutter, some half-assed splicing, and a foot of electrical tape later, and we have a nice 250 MHz G3 Powerbook with a 4 Gig HD running OS9 quite peppily. And my coworker who had given up a bunch of files for dead 2 years ago is going to get them back.... once I figure out how to get them off a computer with no USB port or CD-R... just an antiquated SCSI port with a weird square hole. (My coworker claims that there should be a SCSI Zip drive around somewhere, but methinks some clever AppleTalk networking will be a better solution.)

But man... when you find a dead Mac, fiddle with it for a few minutes and get rewarded by that... "PING!!" It's almost as good as sex. Not to mention it solidifies my reputation around the department as having nearly God-like computer powers.

good ideas gone bad... and back again...

Well, it started out as a good idea. I felt so crappy yesterday that I decided I was going to sleep in today. There really is no reason NOT to sleep in on Wednesdays. I have nothing to do in the city until noon. So I lay in bed until the luxurious hour of 6:35 (!!) checked the train schedule and figured I'd take the 7:29. Which was a great plan but for the fact that the Boy woke up at 6:50 and needed my attention. (The Wife was running on the treadmill, and I figured it was better for me to deal with it than have her interrupt her routine.) So I left the house 5 minutes later than I intended, but still should have had time to make the train. Except I forgot that my path to the train station takes me past a SCHOOL which is not a problem at 6:30 when I usually drive by, but turns the whole fucking area into a parking lot at 7:15. So I missed the damned train. And the next one isn't for 45 minutes. Fuck. Maybe this whole plan was NOT such a good idea.

So rather than sit in the car and run the engine the whole time, I decided to drive down the road and maybe find a cafe or something. I wasn't hoping for much... the station I go to is in the middle of nowhere between two tiny towns. Town A is too far to drive to and back again, so I head to Town B. But before I get a mile down the road, I see a sign for a HUGE new coffee place (in the middle of nowhere) and decide to drop in. Jackpot. The place is gorgeous and fireplacey inside, with a million tables... AND they brew Republic of Tea loose-leaf in a french press. Sweet.

So, I'm on my late train with a big warm cup of tea, and all is well again. I guess it ended up as a good idea after all.

train stuff...

I'm an idiot. All this time I've been taking the train into Penn Station, because in my mind that's just where trains GO. I come down from up north, change in Secaucus NJ, take the train into Penn, and take the subway from 34th down to 14th.

I've known for a while that there is another option. You can take the train PAST Secaucus to HOBOKEN. There is a train called the PATH train that runs from Hoboken terminal right to 14th street. It always seemed like it would be more trouble, and probably more expensive, since I have no idea how much the additional PATH ticket costs. Well, I recently learned that not only is the PATH ticket just $2... same as the subway I take down from Penn each day, but today I found out that a monthly ticket to Hoboken is FIFTY DOLLARS CHEAPER A MONTH than the ticket I've been buying to Penn Station.

Did I mention that I'm an idiot??

end of day...

Ugh. I have felt like The Crap all freaking day. And yet I still managed to have 2 moderately successful classes, AND finish a student recommendation letter. Accomplishment! Yay! Of course I usually like to reward myself with some goof-off time after I accomplish something, but... fuck... not THIS month. For now I need to spend the rest of the train ride gearing my brain up to deal with the mess that no doubt awaits me at home.

bleah...

I feel like crap this morning... headache... nausea... no idea why, really.

At least it didn't snow today. They were throwing around talk of 2-4 inches up here... 5" + in the city. I woke up today and...? Not a flake. What the hell? Not that I'm complaining, but... get it right, people.

Spent a good chunk of yesterday shopping with the wife. My wife bought some Xmas things, but mostly we bought things for ourselves. I needed snowboots and some jeans... a new scarf. (Long! All my current scarfs are too short and stumpy.) I also bought a new light-tan mock turtleneck. I'm wearing it today with my dark-brown blazer. I call it my "homage to Carl Sagan". (Dave's Wife: "I can't believe you're CULTIVATING that look!")

I finally did get some Xmas shopping done for the wife. Pajamas. Some iPod Nano accessories for the Nano she's planning on buying... an armband exercise-holder, a $15 iTunes gift card, etc. A few stocking stuffers. And a fairly pricey coffee machine. I know, I know... appliances for Xmas... but this is for HER... I don't drink coffee, and she frequently expresses dissatisfaction with the current coffee-making setup. This one grinds AND brews AND has a timer. In other words, you can put whole beans and 2 cups of water in it and have coffee ready in the morning. It will be a hit, I think, and count as the "big" present.

I did some grading this weekend, but not at ALL as much as I wanted/needed to. I'm very unhappy with myself about that.

Xmas has come to the Dr. Dave house. It looks like Santa's fucking workshop exploded... half-emptied bins of decorations EVERYWHERE. It's awful. The tree is about 3/4 decorated... ugh. We have about 2 weeks to get the house together in time for the Boy's b'day party and then our neighborhood Xmas party. Yes, we're throwing a Christmas party. No, I don't know what's wrong with us.

a quick rant...

Hey! MTA! Is the $260 a fucking month I pay to ride the train three fucking days a week not enough for you? You're gonna start charging me for PARKING in this barely-used station out in the middle of nowhere?? Another two bucks a day?? Fuck you. Especially given that half the time I wind up standing up on the goddamned train. You'd better fucking use that extra two bucks to add a couple more cars to each train, you greedy bastards.

dave translates the label on his new jeans...

what it says: "Comfortable waist, Relaxed seat and thigh."

what it means: "Here, try THESE on, FAT-ASS!"

O!! Tannenbaum!!!

Prepared for the annual ordeal of freezing my ass off while whiny children and picky wives stand in a circle and reject fir after fir, I was stunned today to drive to the local farm, get out of the car, pull an absolutely perfect tree out of the stack on the first try and toss it on the roof. The whole process took maybe 3 minutes.

"And what happened then? Well in Whoville, they say that the Grinch's small heart grew THREE SIZES that day!"

have i mentioned that i hate grading...?

It never fails.... any time I get all geared up to grade papers, I barely get started before a case of flagrant plagiarism crops up and pisses me off.

It's right there in the syllabus... DO NOT COPY AND PASTE STUFF FROM THE WEB, I WILL GOOGLE YOU AND FIND OUT. Do they really think I'm too stupid to spot writing that is OBVIOUSLY not written by a non-science college student?? "... and measure the three-dimensional structure and dynamic behavior of the magnetosphere" DING! DING! DING! Off to Google we go!

And it wasn't even plagiarized fome someplace GOOD, but fucking Wikipedia!!

Lazy fuckers.

ok... i'm done screwing around...

Today is the last day. One more train ride of fucking around and doing nothing and I'm DONE. It has reached that critical point where one more day of procrastinating will get me fired. If I don't start grading some crap now, there is no way I'm gonna get through it all before the final, and I want the students to have MOST of their stuff back before the exam. And I have deadlines with regard to equipment to order and letters of recommendation to write that need to be done NOW if they are going to get done at all.

So.

I am making some deals with myself. No TV tonite until I finish this recommendation letter. Then I will grade Astronomy papers tomorrow morning. Once finished, I may allow myself a trip to B&N or Target to do some Xmas shopping. Saturday night I will handle departmental administrative tasks and answer nagging backlogged emails. Then Monday I will grade Physics and Astronomy homeworks, and a make-up Midterm exam.

By Tuesday I will be giddy with accomplishment. You wait and see.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to enjoy my final two hours of fuckoffery.

more great ideas from the procrastination department...

Hey, Dave! You know what would be a great idea to spend your time on this morning? Instead of actually planning your lectures, spend about an hour fucking around with that new "outlining" program that came with your Mac. That would be great to use for lecture planning. And given that it's three weeks before the end of the semester... what better time to go and change your workflow by adding a brand new tool to the process?!

disclaimer...

Ok, it's a great looking costume, and "award winning" and all that... but the poor kid fell on his face before he even got out of the driveway tonight!

"help us, obi wan kenobi..."

As promised, here are the pics of the kids' Halloween costumes...



In case it's not obvious... I was in charge of one costume and my wife was in charge of the other. Who did a better job? It's not for me to judge. Although I will say, only ONE of the costumes won First Place for "Most Original" in the town Halloween Parade this weekend...




Oh yeah, baby...

(PS> Yes, that IS an actual color-changing LED light on Artoo's head. Thank you.)

cute pics of kids...

Because it's been a while...




Stay tuned for Halloween pics, too. The boy's R2-D2 costume is seriously going to kick ass.

Shhh....!

I don't want to type too loudly lest Old Whitey here get jealous, but his days are officially numbered. There's about to be a new kid in town.

Oh, yeah...

i wonder if he usually... "takes the helm", if you know what I mean...?

Via Dr. Bitch, big entertainment news of the day... George "Sulu" Takei has come out in a recent interview. Which is great, y'know? Good for him. But really... do those Star Trek fan-fiction weirdos needed any more fuel for their twisted little fantasies.

dave's political shitstorm minute...

Seems that the Miers nomination has tanked. I have mixed feelings about it... given that most of the criticism of Miers was coming from the RIGHT, I expect we'll eventually wind up with someone more conservative and more ideologically objectionable. but in the meantime...

NYAH-NYAH!!

A handful of indictments tomorrow would make this a fine week indeed.

dave's celebrity gossip minute...

I hear Angelina Jolie wants to adopt some more kids. I think it's pretty clear from her history that Ms. Jolie has a bit of an obsessive personality, and that adoption is her new Billy Bob. Problem is, you can't just have those Cambodian kids lasered off when you get tired of them in a few years.

exam day...

Today promises to be a fairly low-key, if a bit long, day. I'm giving two midterm exams, which means a whole-lotta sitting around doing nothing. Or grading, which is what I SHOULD do while they are test-taking. We'll see... maybe a little of both. Then in the afternoon I'm having lunch with a former colleague... the guy who replaced me for a short time at the Old School. We worked together pretty closely during the transition... now he teachers Anthropology at a "Major Texas University", as they say. Anyway, he's in town for a conference of some sort, so we're going to get together at the Museum of Natural History and catch up.

Then I have to head back downtown for a committee meeting at 4:00. Yay. The good news is that my OTHER committee adjourned it's business for the semester on Tuesday, so I won't have to meet with them until the Spring. Maybe this whole committee-thing won't be so bad after all.

Other tidbits...

* I finally got around to updating iTunes on my Mac the other day, and I have now discovered "podcasts". Not the crap that people do in their bedrooms, but stuff from NPR and Nature and Macworld. It's great for the train. One more way to multi-task!

* Speaking of the Mac, I'm starting to get itchy for an upgrade. A recent consolidation of the Powerbook line, and a price drop on the 12" Powerbook in particular makes it a pretty good time. Plus we just recently got a $5000 check back from the house closing, and a $1600 rebate from the idiot movers who lost our truck for a month. (Boy, did we have to fight for THAT check!) So we have a little extra cash lying around this month. We'll see.

* I'm still sick. I thought it had gone into Sinus Infection Land, but that seems to have passed, and it's been a chest thing for a couple of days. Fuck. Are there any symptoms left that I've missed??

* The woman sitting next to me on the train has a perfect manicure. (So RED!) Now she's doing the lipstick thing. Love that. Anyway, *I* on the other hand have paint all over my hands as a result of applying a primer coat of special "sticks to plastic" spray paint to our Astromech-droid-in-progress last night. Know what the special "sticks to plastic" spray paint sticks to even better than plastic? FLESH!!!

I think that's it for now. I'm going to take advantage of the whole "no teaching today" situation to close my eyes for a while.

will this make me a "scab"...?

Well, it's beginning to look more and more like the part-time faculty at our University are going to go on strike. Which raises the question of...? What do we FULL-TIME do? Do we cross a picket line and teach our classes anyway, or do we try to hold class someplace else, or online, or...?

And I'm not the most pro-union Democrat you'll ever meet anyway, but in this case any sympathy I may have with the PT faculty's issues (which is not a whole lot) is going to pretty quickly evaporate if their strike fucks up my semester. My inclination is to teach my class at their regular time and place... picket lines be damned. I don't like to be bullied and I don't like groupthink and I don't like other people deciding for me how I should feel about this or that issue. And if I'm not overwhelmingly supportive of the PT Union's demand, I consider my primary responsibility to MY job and MY contract and MY students.

And I know the life of an adjunct professor is pretty crappy and low-paying and the prevalence of adjuncts is symptomatic of wider problems with the academic establishment, but... still. I still can't help but feel that if you've been working a part-time job for 15 years... you must not be very good.

about last week...

I was so distracted last week about various distracting things that are still occupying certain parts of my distractible brain, that I never got around to writing about my guest lecture gig. (There are other things I haven't written about as well, but that's mostly on purpose.)

I rolled into the Hamptons at around 10:30 PM Thursday night, so figure I was coming off a 3 + hour drive from NYC. I checked into the swank guest house, and proceeded to pace off excess energy and fuck around online until 12:30. (Mistake!) By 7:30 next morning I was up and off to the Old School where I was welcomed back like a conquering hero by all my old colleagues. It's good to be a superstar! I was even told by an English teacher that it was like seeing a historical figure come to life. ("Like Charlemagne" she added, in her posh, British accent.)

My ego was feeling fine last week, I must say.

The lecture was impeccable, if I do say so myself... and the HS students were rapt and attentive and asked questions. Questions! THOUGHTFUL questions! More questions in 2 hours than I've been asked ALL SEMESTER by my college kids. I was "in the zone". There was applause... there were accolades... there were invitations to return on a regular basis.

I am... indeed... "The Man". If there was any lingering doubt, let it be cast aside now.

Then I spent all day sitting at the lunch tables, telling the same life-update story to person after person after person. That part was quite grueling. My voice began to give out. I started to get headachey. Too much socializing takes a toll on me.

So, by 2:00 I was on the road again... 5 hours later I was home. It was a long, sleepy drive but I took lots of food breaks and managed not to drive off a bridge. So... that was that... all in all a pretty good day. I don't know if I want to do it again. As nice as it was... that was a LOT of effort for a few hundred bucks. I probably will do it though,... since I have an overly-strong and often-misplaced sense of loyalty, and because I'm a sucker for rapt audiences and comparisons to historical figures.

bite your tongue, weather.com....

"Windy with showers this evening changing over to rain and snow overnight. Low 37F. Winds NNW at 25 to 35 mph. Chance of precip 70%"

Oh no you di'-nt!!

morning commute non-entry snipped from email...

God... 6:40 AM is way too fucking early to be on a train. I don't have any idea what I'm doing in class today... EITHER class. I was supposed to review for midterms, but... that's not something that I should really waste a whole damned period on. I'm too tired to plan anything, though. It's still the Week From Hell... committee meetings and crap, and the Mother-in-Law is flying in in a couple of days, so we're spending all day cleaning the house and/or fighting over cleaning the house...

I promised my students some grading by today, but... fuck...

Anyway, I'm gonna go read my morning blog downloads and then maybe take a nap. No snoring, I promise...

have i mentioned there was ICE on my car this morning..

Tonight marked the third visit by someone to supposedly FIX our heat upstairs, which currently has none. You know? The upstairs? Where everyone SLEEPS? Including two small CHILDREN?

How fucking hard can it be to localize and repair this problem?

hey, i know...!

Let's go pick apples in the pouring rain! After all, it's a refreshing 48 fucking degrees!

(Ah, it's good to be back...)

back to reality...

I probably don't need to explain why I haven't blogged for a couple of days... you all saw the "list". Basically, Thursday and Friday came down to 48 hours of constant anxiety, punctuated by a handful of perfect moments that made the whole two days... well... more than bearable.

I may say more about that. But probably not.

a list or something...

I hate starting the day off by oversleeping... even when I have nothing in particular to be late for. I mean... I don't teach on Wednesdays, I just have office hours at 10:00, which means I can miss 2 or 3 trains and still get to work in time to sit in my office and do nothing, but I still like to catch my regular train and get there at the regular time. And when I don't, it just fills the morning with a constant low-level feeling of being rushed and stressed. And there's no reason for it at all.

Especially when I have legitimate reasons to be stressed!

Agreeing to give this talk on Friday was downright insane. Because it has to be ready TODAY, given that I drive out there tomorrow night. It also means I'm DRIVING to work on Thursday, which... ugh... I never know how much time to leave myself to drive into Manhattan. It's so fucking unpredictable. I always wind up overcompensating and leaving at 4:00 AM or something.

But because I'm driving, that deprives me of 4 hours of useful train time to plan my regular Thursday classes. So everything I'm doing for the next two days has to be done by tonight. I know it's probably NORMAL for SOME people to REGULARLY be prepared for things two days ahead. I hate those people.

So I need to make myself a list or something.

To Do Today:
* Grade at least one set of homeworks for each class
* Print out in-class activity for astronomy tomorrow
* Figure out what the hell we're doing in physics class Thursday
* Go through Friday's presentation once more and figure out what's missing
* Print out some directions and other files for Friday

To Do Tonight:
* Watch "Lost".
* Select and pack change of clothes, overnight bag for Thursday night.
* Iron clothes for Thursday.
* Plan drive for Thursday morning, decide on times. Figure out how the hell I got to the Lincoln Tunnel last time, which was accidental, but very effective.

To Do Thursday:
* Drive to NYC
* Teach classes, discuss midterm exams with both.
* Have lunch with out-of-town visitor.
* Attend faculty meeting.
* Remember to pack up my computer gizmo bag from the office.
* Have coffee/dinner/?? with out-of-town visitor. Wait out rush hour. Consume large amounts of caffeine.
* Drive to Hamptons. Stop often to rest if not enough caffeine. Stop often to pee if too much caffeine.
* Check in at Guest House. Look over presentation one more time. Sleep.

To Do Friday:
* Get up early if presentation still needs work. (I always like to stick in a few last-minute slides!) Iron clothes if necessary.
* Head to Old School for breakfast, chit-chat w/ former colleagues.
* Give talk.
* Hang out through all 3 lunch shifts, chit-chat w/ former colleagues.
* Begin driving towards home by 1:30 or so
* Resist and/or succumb to impulse to visit once-favorite Long Island lap-dance establishment.
* Continue driving towards home.

I feel like I'm missing some things... especially with regards to things I need to do tonight. But I think I'll print this out and use it as a check-off list. It will give me the illusion of control, which really... is about all I can ever hope for.

the judas priest thing...

There was a Judas Priest concert around here the day before my birthday that I *almost* convinced myself to go see. Now, I was never much of a Priest fan as a teen... I was always more of an Iron Maiden kinda guy. Iron Maiden, being more progressive and science-fictiony was basically heavy metal for guys who really would rather be listening to Rush. Kinda like Rush was Pink Floyd for kids who didn't smoke pot.

But I digress...

I was never a HUGE Priest fan, but I had the requisite albums in my LP collection... British Steel... Point of Entry... Defenders of the Faith. I enjoyed these albums and all the "hit" songs, but... eh... they were never a favorite. But in light of recent events, I can now look at these old Priest songs in a whole new light. You see... since Rob Halford "came out" a few years back during his vacation from the band... the songs take on a whole new meaning. I get great pleasure in knowing that all these songs we teenage boys once thought were about motorcycles are really about a good, hard ass-fucking!

games people play...

When I fall behind in grading, sometimes I bribe myself... other times I try to trick myself. Like for instance, I could semi-intentionally neglect to charge my laptop all afternoon, so that I will have no choice but to close the lid on the train and work on something else.

Of course... nothing's stopping me from sleeping.

f-f-f-foolin'...

God... these long weekends are a killer. It's been 5 days since I've been to work, and I found myself sitting on the edge of the bed this morning looking at the alarm clock, saying to myself... "5:40?? Shit, is that really what time I get out of bed??" Unfortunately, the answer was - yes.

So, if you think a 5-day weekend would mean that I perhaps had done a little extra course planning, or caught up on my grading at all, well... clearly you're new around here. I did do a lot of work on my guest lecture for Friday, which mostly consisted of resurrecting an old PowerPoint and changing all the fonts. (It's amazing how quickly fonts look dated, isn't it??) I had a problem while planning for today's classes - it's happening a lot lately - where I know exactly what I want to accomplish in class, but I also know that it doesn't amount to NEARLY 90 minutes worth of material. Around 10:00 PM last night, a flash of inspiration hit, and I now know what I'll be doing to fill up the physics class, but as far as astronomy goes... well... that second flash of inspiration had better come along real soon.

My whole astro class has become a bit of a disaster, actually. I cut out some topics early on, and then rushed through the historical stuff, and now I find myself kind of disturbingly far ahead of my syllabus. I'm worried I may run out of stuff to teach. I think it may be time to look into some MOVIES!

In other news... still suffering from migrating cold symptoms. Last night I was starting to feel pretty normal, but today I feel sinusy and headachey. Both kids are walking snot factories too. It's a LOVELY time to be at our house!

Today begins the Two Weeks From Hell. I think my wife is going to be out for the next two evenings, then I'm away Thursday nite, possibly until lateish Friday. Then next week I have two committee meetings and the mother in law is visiting, and we're going to a party Saturday, and my daughter's weekend classes start, and the wife is spending Sunday in the city with her Mom, and I have to start this fucking R2-D2 costume over again because the silver paint I used is flaking off the plastic trash can, and I have to write 2 midterms by next Thursday...

I know. I've been through it all already. Sometimes I just forget and need to jump start my anxiety levels.

Oh, also... speaking of anxiety... for the past 5 days I've been vaguely unsure of the whereabouts of my iPod. I was 99% sure that it was in my other blazer, which I left at the office on Thursday (you'll recall there was a blazer swapping incident that day) but my brain is famously unable to let go of that 1%. (Update: I'm in my office... it was in the blazer.)


On a completely unrelated note... the rock radio station around here suuuure does like their Def Leppard. And speaking of bad 80's rock... remind me to tell you the thing about Judas Priest...

But right now, I have to go...

and the "parent of the year" award goes to...

I was trying to give the Boy medicine this morning, and the Dimetapp was empty and I couldn't get the cap off the Sudafed, and I don't even remember saying it, but I must have, because while I was checking on the dosage for 3-year-olds on the bottle, the Little Guy picks up the bottle of Dimetapp and says...

"What... da hell... is... UP wif yis?"

Me: (calmly) Buddy, don't say that.

(thoughtful pause)

Boy: ... shit.

"that's a perfectly good bike! who would throw that away...?"

The third Monday of the month around here is "bulk trash pickup" day. Which means that all over town, curbs are piled high with mattresses and lounge chairs, bikes and microwaves, bookshelves and treadmills. And I can't tell you how hard I am fighting my genetic predisposition towards driving around town and loading up the van with junk. I swear to god... this would be like CHRISTMAS for my Dad!

nothing ever works...

I decided yesterday to try looking into Apple's mail program (cleverly titled "Mail" if you must know) as an alternative to the Eudora I've been using for 4 or 5 years. I've been reading about many people who have switched recently, so I was hoping that maybe it didn't suck as bad as the version that I tried out with OSX 10.1. And yeah... it doesn't. It feels nice and streamlined and Appley, so I may stick with it.

One problem.

I needed to import all of my existing Eudora mail... 7000 or so saved messages, which it did happily, even keeping my subfolder structure intact, but when it imported the messages that *I* myself had sent, it somehow dated them all as being sent "Yesterday". Which kinda permanently fucks up my sent-mail archive. So now I have to decide if I care enough that it's worth NOT switching over.

Or maybe there is an update I can download and DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN!

Computers are FUN!

snif, snif... squawk!

I have a headache. And a fever. And now I'm congested too.

It's the fucking Bird Flu, I know it.

ok... this is serious now...

The rain has GOT to fucking STOP.

Now.

Really.

how much worse can it get, dave?

We have dual zone heating in our house... meaning... one floor of our house is heated, while the upstairs is TOTALLY NOT!!

on the bright side, after another 36 I'll almost surely be dead...

Leave the house, walk to car, notice it's raining, walk back to house, pick up umbrella, open to test for spiky-ness, walk back to car, drive to train station, get out of car, pick up umbrella, push little somehow-now-jammed handle pushbutton repeatedly to no end until reaching the conclusion...

Birthdays... oh how they suck!

There is a science department meeting today, and we all have a "project" that we're supposed to have completed, which of course I haven't even started, so I have to go to my office and rush-rush-rush the thing out before noon. Not a big deal, but it does mean that nothing else gets done today.

I woke up with a sore throat today. Not sure why. There is a lot of low-grade semi-cold floating around the house. Snotty kids. Maybe this is that.

I'm wearing a grey blazer with brown shoes because my brown blazer is at the office. I'll swap them when I get there, but in the meantime, it really bugs me.

I had yoga class yesterday. The verdict is still out on this one. It's a lot more rapid-fire-Vinyasa crap than I really care for... but the instructor always pulls some kinds of weird-ass pose out of her bag-of-yoga-tricks that I've never seen before, which feels like utter TORTURE while I'm doing it, but makes me feel really great after class. She still runs 15 minutes over, though... which is NOT cool.

I put first coat of silver and blue paint on the Artoo trashcan last night. Painter's masking tape doesn't really work very well on the plastic, so I think I'm going to have to do a lot of touch-ups, but I think it's going to be cute. My wife and I are currently arguing over the minimum acceptable face-opening size for safe visibility. Moms ruin everything.

I feel like I was awake every hour from 1:30 AM to 5:30 AM last night. Bedwetting incidents... scratchy cats... then there's that damned "alarm clock" thingy. At least that has an off button. Oh yeah.. did I mention I was a half hour late getting out of bed? Yeah. I'm having Jolt caffeinated gum for breakfast at the moment.

Oh, also... I forgot my watch.

So, it's 7:30, and the day already kinda sucks. Oh well... at least I have the lame presents and perfunctory sex to look forward to!


(PS> I managed to PRY my umbrella open, which is good, because it is fucking POURING. Also, I just realized I left the powercord to my laptop at home. Buy guess what? I HAVE A SPARE! At the OFFICE! Take THAT, Universe!!)

"I'd like 2 reams of 8.5" x 11"... extra curly...!

Almost every day on the way to work from the subway station, I pass a stationery store called "JAM Paper and Office Supply". I don't know about you, but when I'm shopping for office paper, I always look for the word "jam" right there in the name.

it's not even going someplace NICE...

One of those days, right... late committee meeting, try to rush and get a train at a decent hour... sit down on a train, but screw up the track numbers cuz you don't know the schedules this late... quickly gather your things and rush OFF the train when they announce it's not stopping where you want to GO...

The upshot? Not only am I NOT getting home at a decent hour, but my fucking leather jacket is going to TRENTON MOTHERFUCKING NEW JERSEY... WITHOUT ME!!

starting to lose it...

Busy... man, do I hate being this busy. My October calendar is PACKED. It's not even funny. Tomorrow is my fucking birthday, and I keep forgetting. I bring this up not to solicit birthday wishes from readers, but rather to point out how little it matters. It's just one more thing to "deal with", really... I could honestly do without it. Can I celebrate by being allowed to SLEEP for all of Yom Kippur?

The number of meetings I'm expected to attend seems to be growing exponentially.... and... I'm sorry, excuse me a moment...

"HEY, ASSHOLE!! That's a very nice 20" Dell Inspiron laptop you've got there, but believe it or not, it does NOT entitle you to take up FOUR FUCKING SEATS. MOVE IT!

Where was I? Ah... The number of meetings I'm expected to attend seems to be growing exponentially, and when you add in various social commitments, and the impending Holiday Seasons... I'm starting to feel a little overwhelmed. Make that VERY overwhelmed. A sample...

Thu 10/20 - lunch w/ friend from out of town.
Thu 10/20 - Evening: drive to Hamptons
Fri 10/21 - lecture at Old School, drive home (4 hrs)

Tue 10/25 - Academic Committee meeting
Wed 10/26 - Student Life committee meeting
Wed 10/26 - Mother-in-law visit

Sat 10/29 - Daughter's weekend 'enrichment' class begins
Sat 10/29 - Evening work party in NYC
Sun 10/30 - Wife in city w/ Mom all day, watch kids

Mon 10/31 - Halloween (must complete transformation of trashcan into R2-D2)
Thu 11/3 - Work/student party/event at 6:00 PM

That's not to mention, at some point in there I need to write, deliver, and grade 2 midterm exams. And yeah, I know some peoples' lives are like this all the time, but... NOT MINE. It's not even so much the events themselves as the mental energy that must be expended THINKING about the events. Every committee meeting means a 14 hour work day... every party means social-anxiety-stress... every deadline means procrastination and worry. Then we get to plan our trip to Baltimore for Thanksgiving. OH BOY!!

It was not my intent to be such a downer today, but... I'M TIRED AND I LOST MY FUCKING COAT!!

choosy dads choose...

I made the kids lunch today and then cleared the table of all the bread and stuff and went to check my email. After I while I noticed that The Boy was sitting at the table going... "J...A...I...F! J...A...I...F!"

OK, I'll bite... "Whatcha spellin', Buddy?"

(I was pretty sure I knew what was coming...)

(pause) "Peanut Butter!"

Yes, yes you are. My only question is how he knows what a lowercase "f" looks like.

the delicate dance of parental responsibility shirking...

So, the wife is at a professional conference of some sort in Manhattan today, which means I'll be stuck on kid duty from wake-up to bedtime. (It's pouring rain too, so we'll be trapped in the house all day.) I'd bitch and moan, except that the Old School came through with a speaking fee for my guest lecture, and agreed to put me up at the Guest House for a night, so in a couple of weeks I get to leave work on a Thursday and drive to the Hamptons for an overnight gig. I think I win.

it's not MY project, but...

... wouldn't you think if you were going to spend hours designing a custom closet online and spending $800+ on the pieces that at some point during the process you would have actually measured the fucking closet to make sure that what you were buying was actually going to FIT where you intended to put it?

I'm just saying.

out of joint...

Last night I found myself sitting in a chair with my left palm and wrist aching (new piano -> carpal tunnel and tendonitis) and a dull, deep pain in my right arm from my fingers up to my elbow. (wet fall weather -> arthritis flare up.) It's not much better today, although the right is better than the left. Being old sucks. Less than a week until I hit the downside of my 30's. Pushing 40? Yup. Pushing it so hard my arms hurt.

and those little yellow lights don't do SHIT...

The fog around here in the mornings lately is fucking insane, and I can't imagine it's going to get anything but WORSE as the weather continues to cool. I seriously almost drove into a fucking ditch yesterday trying to make a left hand turn onto a road I couldn't see. The last thing I need in the mornings is low-grade, white-knuckle driving-stress.

Anyways, I graded some papers yesterday, and then some on the train today, but I'm STILL not caught up. And I have more coming in today. I was a little depressed by the marginally-more-than-50% hand-in rate in the physics class for the most recent assignment. Although I guess it matches the typical marginally-more-than-50% ATTENDANCE rate most days. Some people had better get their withdrawal forms in.

Ok. I need to make some plans for Astro class.

students have lives...?

So... I've been invited to serve on the "Student Life and Outreach Committee". That's the way they phrase it, you know... "We would like to INVITE you to serve on such and such committee." I'm not sure an answer of "no" is really an option. Nonetheless, I've tried to think of a way to respond to the Dean to say, politely... "You know... I think my expertise would really be put to better use on another committee... given that I really don't give a rat's ass about students OR their lives." But I can't help but feel that wouldn't come off well. So I guess I'm stuck.

school update...

I think I mentioned that my wife and I had a meeting scheduled with our daughter's principal on Monday? Maybe? Anyway... the result of that meeting is that, pending a few reading and math tests and a talk with the school psychologist, we will most likely be the parents of an "instant second grader" some time next week. It basically comes down to... yeah, it would be nicer if this could be handled within the first grade classroom, but the teacher doesn't really have the time or the experience to modify the curriculum THAT much, so the only place for her to really get work that's at her level will be in second grade. So. There you go. Time to call that financial planner...

She's a little sad about leaving her new friends after only a few weeks, but her initial reaction was a HUGE smile and a shout of "YES!" She spent last night doing practice problems in math workbooks. (With no prompting from us, I might add. It was completely her idea.) Should a first grader really be "cramming" for an exam?

out of the closet...

For reasons still somewhat unclear to me, we're installing a custom "Pax" closet system into the master bedroom. Purchasing said closet system involved not only a certain amount of "consultation" with the IKEA closet planner guy, but sitting around for a half-hour while they pull all the pieces from the warehouse. All this with two evil little children running around and fighting and screaming at one another. Add another 20 minutes of trying to figure out how to get five 8' long by 24" wide boxes into the van, and you may just be able to imagine the scope of the headache I had yesterday afternoon.

So... there is $800 worth of closet-fixin's sitting in our foyer. This Friday I get to empty the closet... tear out the existing wire shelves, spackle the wall-holes, and then generally keep the kids at bay while my wife assembles FIVE giant pieces of IKEA furniture. (The wife has inherited the job of furniture assembly. It's like a puzzle. She enjoys it. Totally fucking fine with me.) The end result will be a beautiful, well-organized closet with considerably LESS storage space than it had before. But you didn't hear that from ME...

"Hello? This is Discover Card fraud protection...?"

Sorry. No time to post. We're out spending all the money we got from the sale of the house. On Things...! We....! Really...! Need...!

is he strong? listen bud, he's got radioactive blood...

I've decided that one way Netflix allows you to SAVE money is by allowing you to rent extremely silly DVDs that, despite their silliness, you've been tempted to actually drop $50 on everytime you pass them in Target. Case in point... last week I Netflicked the first disc of "Spiderman - the Complete '67 series". As much as I enjoyed some of the groovy music, I'm somewhat disappointed that overall, my tastes weren't quite as discerning when I was EIGHT as I remember them being.

One amusing thing... a large number of the voices are from Rudolph the Rednosed Reindeer! Example... J. Jonah Jameson - Donner... his secretary is "Mrs. Donner" and every random child and paperboy sounds suspiciously like Rudolph himself. Worse yet... you'd never know when he's Spiderman, but when he's Peter Parker, the voice becomes a little more tenory... it's HERMEY!!

I feel betrayed somehow...

one, two, three, four... HI-5...!!!

We're going to take the kids to go see Hi-5 this evening at a Hurricane Katrina benefit event in upstate NY.

I dread the peppiness!!

Although, a couple of the chicks ARE kinda hot...

just say no to (cheap) drugs...

The cover story in the local paper today asks the question why crystal meth (which has become "The Scourge of the Nation"!) hasn't gained popularity here in the NY area. Any guesses as to why? I didn't even have to read the article to figure it out.

Give up?

Cheap, plentiful, and readily available heroin and cocaine!! WE'RE NUMBER ONE!!! I knew there was a reason I moved back to NY, though... as if people who spend $600 on shoes would be caught dead using off-the-rack DRUGS.

The thing that amuses me about crystal meth is... you know the Sudafed people love it. They have to pretend NOT to, but seriously... what LUCK!! I bet the people who make Tylenol have a lab set up trying to figure out a way to make Tylenol into something to get you stoned, so they can leak the info to the Street.

hey kids! what's the best kind of night...?

A VOMIT NIGHT!!

Ah well... it was one kid, one vomit, before bedtime, well foreshadowed, and mostly trashcan-contained. This, I have decided to label a "Category One Vomit". (One step above an "Intestinal Depression".)

This is what parenting does to you. You can actually find yourself fairly pleased whilst cleaning up vomit.

the wisdom of dr. dave does not come cheap...

I just got an email from the science teacher who has my old job at the Old School, and she heard I'm back in NY, and she wants me to come give a guest lecture to the seniors. ("The Fate of the Universe") She's not offering to PAY me anything more than just travel expenses.

Uhh... no? From where I live now to the Old School is FOUR HOURS... whether by car, train, or bus. Getting out there for a lecture at 9:30 in the morning is no small feat. I don't even think it's possible. They'd have to put me up out there the night before. And even still... we're talking about a whole day of my time... if not a day and a half. Besides it's time away from home on a Friday, which is a day that I'm usually on kid duty so the wife can WORK. I'm not giving up a whole day of my life for $50 of bus fare and lunch at the cafeteria. I want at least a TOKEN fucking speaking fee, for christ's sake.

So I replied with that argument... although phrased a bit more diplomatically. If she can come up with some money from the administration, I'll consider it. I would like to see some of the gang at the Old School again. And if they were willing to put me up the night before the lecture, the night in question (Thursday Oct 20th) would be a VERY nice night to have an excuse to NOT go home after work... for reasons I'll not go into right now.

Anyway... the moral of the story... DAVE IS A PHYSICS WHORE!!!

how to know when you've been reading too much news and not enough physics...

... when you read Newton's Second Law (F=ma) as "FEMA".

"You might have Mail...!"

I have to remember to always sit in this train car on the way home... when we pull up to the first stop, we are close enough to a neighborhood of houses that I can pick up a weak open network and check my mail really quick. Not that I actually GOT any mail just now, but the whole idea just strikes me as TOTALLY NAUGHTY AND COOL!!

entry 1,139... in which Jesus gets dissed...

Believe it or not, I wasn't TOO sore yesterday. Granted, I couldn't really easily raise my arms above shoulder-height... but my legs were ok and my abs were ok. Then I walked up to 20th street to look at some Timbuk2 messenger bags (I may order a custom one with my birthday money in a few weeks, but I wanted to see them "in-person" first)... and then I walked down to NYU to grab some books from the library and suddenly my legs started to complain a bit. Now... TODAY?? NOW I'm sore!!

So... the committee assignments came down yesterday. I'm on the "Academic Standards Committee". According to the announcement the committee is "responsible for reviewing student appeals of grades, mediating in cases of charges of plagiarism and other academic standards issues". Great... so all my LEAST favorite things to have to deal with in my OWN courses?? Now I have to deal with them in EVERYONE'S COURSES!! Oh well... there are worse committees, I guess.

I just realized yesterday that I have pretty much a 5 day vacation now... given that I don't teach on Fridays or Mondays, and that next Tuesday is Rosh Hashana. Yay for the Jews and their scattered fall holidays! I have no idea what Rosh Hashana IS, really... I just know we're celebrating by driving to IKEA and spending our house-sale money on a custom closet for master bedroom.

Speaking of religions, I had a great experience at the Unitarian church last Sunday. It was the first time we've seen a sermon by the actual minister of the church. (Meetings are often congregation-led, especially in the summer). He was going on and on and decided to illustrate his topic with a reading from the Book of John (from, as he called it... "a book called 'The Bible'..." as if perhaps many of us had never heard of it.) He reads this thing about sheep, and thieves coming over the fence, and Jesus coming through the gate, and sheep following the voice of their owner... and.... who the hell knows... once the Bible comes out, Dave begins to tune out a bit. Then after he reads the thing, the Minister says... "What John is saying here, and what Jesus is saying... if in fact he did say these words..."

Hmm? What? I'm awake!!! I perked up even more when, after explaining the meaning of the parable, he added... "This is one place where I think the Bible is wrong. There is NOT just one path to spiritual truth. I think ALL world religions offer a path to enlightenment..."

Dude... did you just dis' JESUS?? I SO have to trick my Mom into coming to Church with us when she visits. SHE WILL FUCKING EXPLODE!!!

Alright... time to think for a few minutes about what I'm teaching this morning. This is the 4th week of classes, folks. THE SEMESTER IS 1/4 OVER!!

TV updates...

First 2 minutes of the "West Wing" premier? Inexcusably lame. I hope Aaron Sorkin watched it... got all whacked out on heroin... showed up on John Well's doorstep... and beat the living fuck out of him. (The rest of the episode did not suck too terribly badly, but I will never forgive them the "flash-forward".)

"Lost"... never ceases to elicit a "what the fuck?" at least once an episode. Although Jack's flashback came too close to the next scene and my wife and I both guessed it was the Australian jogger guy in the bunker. But the opening scene... where you're trying to guess what character we're seeing in a flashback to the 70's and it turns out not to be a flashback but some guy living in the bunker RIGHT NOW!!! Nice...

Not impressed with "Survivor" so far... but it always takes a good 6 weeks before I get into it anyway. "The Amazing Race" also started last night. Not sure how I feel about the family-team idea. I feel sorry for the people with the young kids. We can't even take ours to NYC for an afternoon without wanting to kill one of them... what are they THINKING?? And God, please let that Brooklyn family with the two sons get eliminated... I can't listen to them shout at each other for another episode.

That "Geena Davis is President" show is on the TiVo, awaiting a watch. I hear the Republicans are claiming the whole show is a liberal-Hollywood conspiracy to soften people to the idea of a female President in preparation for a 2008 Hillary run. Really? How do we know it isn't it a Republican conspiracy to get people read for a Condi candidacy? Because that would be paranoid and silly.

O, Alabama... Where Art Thou?

Hey... I have a question. Didn't there used to be a season between summer and winter that lasted more than 4 days? Because it's FORTY-ONE FUCKING DEGREES THIS MORNING!!!

Also. Can I just say how much people who SNORE on the train piss me off? I mean... dozing off a little is fine, but there is no excuse for a non-homeless person to be in such a deep sleep on public transit.

o(m) my GOD...

Oh... I have another equation for today... one I just discovered myself...

(beginner's yoga class in NYC) = ((beginner's yoga class in Alabama) ² + 30 minutes) x (ouch)!

Holy fucking FUCK. There was WAY too much of THIS going on...

Ok, now we're going to do another downward dog, heels against the wall, now lift your right leg BACK hip height, right foot against the wall, now straighten your right leg and lift your left leg, left foot against the wall...

Umm... hello? My schedule says "Yoga Basics"? I'm pretty sure the 90º feet-on-the-fucking-wall handstand DOES NOT QUALIFY AS BASIC!!! (**)

It was rough. And HOT in there! (Where on the schedule does it say "Bikram"? Hmmm?? NOWHERE!!) It was so brutal that the additional NYC-sexiness of the women in class DID NOT EVEN MAKE UP FOR IT!!

Worst of all, the hour-fifteen class went fifteen minutes OVER. Meaning that I had to SPRINT back to the office and the subway in order to make my train. Yoga classes are supposed to help me RELAX, which doesn't really help if they are followed by 30 minutes of "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHH!". Y'know?

Anyway, I fully expect to need assistance getting out of bed tomorrow.

Namasté!

Dave


(** Although... truth be told, I rocked this pose. Because the second part of it is to take one foot OFF the wall and stick that leg straight-the-fuck-up in the air. And while the yoga instructor chick was standing in front of (behind?) me holding my hips square, the back of my calf touched her head. "Ooh!" she exclaimed, "That one touched my head! You really don't have to do that. I mean - it was nice, but... yeah... that's plenty." Yeah... you're damned right it was "nice". NOW EASE THE FUCK UP!!)

speaking of geniuses...

I had a pretty clear idea what I was going to do in my classes today, but then yesterday I received an email from an APS mailing list reminding me that today is the 100th anniversary of the publication of Albert Einstein's first paper on relativity, containing (a form of) his famous equation E = mc². So in celebration, I'm going to trash my planned lectures for the day and talk about Einstein instead. It actually dovetails quite nicely with what I'm doing in "Foundations of Physics"... not so much with "Astronomy", but... it's Einstein, so...

Oh, also... I'm wearing my Einstein tie. (Although I was unable to find my E = mc² tie-tack.)

--- --- ---

I spent most of yesterday lying about the house and recuperating while the wife took care of Important Parenting Business like doctor's appointments and teacher conferences. The teacher conference was scheduled so that we could begin to address issues with our daughter's classwork. The basic phonics and "what letter does this start with" assignments she's been getting have us somewhat worried. (Just this past weekend, while we drove to the Ren Faire, she read aloud to us two chapters from C.S. Lewis. I think the only word she stumbled on was "prodigious".) We went to an open house at her school, and even the most "advanced" readers in her classroom bookset were at a level FAR below where she is now. So we wanted to talk to her teacher about options for enriching the curriculum and so forth. While nothing was decided, a few ideas were tossed around... and the idea of "skipping" her was also put forward. So now we have to agonize over THAT decision.

I'm not worried about 2nd grade or 3rd grade... she does well with older kids... she makes friends pretty easily... she was in an accelerated Kindergarten class last year with kids who were all a year older and didn't have any problems. What I'm worried about is 6th grade... or 7th grade... or 8th grade... Jesus, middle-school is hell enough ANYWAY without being a year younger than everyone in your class. So the social ramifications have me a little resistant to the idea. But then... do I really want her as bored in school as I always was? My wife skipped a grade in elementary school... I was offered the opportunity but my parents decided against it. Who got the better deal? Probably my wife. I was quite the slacker from 7th grade on. Every class my quarterly grades would go B, C, D, A. (bored... bored... bored... oh shit! I'm gonna fail!) Maybe if I was "challenged" early on, those bad patterns would never have developed. Who knows? All I know is I'm going to stop teaching my 2 year old son the alphabet NOW and start working on football. At least that PAYS for college as opposed to giving us ONE LESS YEAR to save!

white stripes concert review...

It was a good concert, all in all. I wish I hadn't seen the "Blackpool Nights" DVD... I would like to have been a little more surprised by the tone of the live shows. The mix of songs was good. The live "arrangements" (if you can call them that) were good. The "sound" was about as good as you could hope for / expect... given the fact that the band consists of essentially a really distorted guitar and a bass drum.

There were more than a few screw-ups, musically... and not just the Jimmy-Page like sloppiness, which is part of his "technique"... A few places where Jack's fingers were in the wrong place... and a missed cue by Meg which earned her a positively withering look from Jack. But the interplay between the two if them is really nice, most of the time. It seems really loose... the way he cues her on all the accents. He even chokes her cymbals for her sometimes, which I think is really... cute? I dunno... it amuses me.

I have to say I can do without the thing where he just unstraps his guitar and drops it on the floor between songs... letting it feedback for 20-30 seconds while he switches instruments. I know it's part of his bad-boy-rock-star "schtick", but really... it pretty fucking obnoxious.

There is very little between-song-banter. I think he spoke to the audience 3 times. One of the exchanges went like this...

JACK: Meg had breakfast with Dennis Hopper today.
AUDIENCE: (applause)
JACK: (pause) ...that's not true.

He was also dressed like some sort of satanic bullfighter. You really have to be a "Rock Star" to pull off wearing a hat like that.

The crowd was far more diverse than I expected. I thought it would be all black-clad greasy-haired hipsters, but no... there were both younger AND older people there than I expected. It's nice to see that they have such a broad appeal.

(I also ran into a former student from the college there, which is always good... helps to reinforce my 'cool prof' street cred!)

Anyway... it was a long night. I didn't quite realize that the drive would be THREE HOURS. Plus, lots of standing around. Fuck "general admission"... I want a CHAIR!! I'm taking many naps today in an attempt to recover.

Dave

PS> The opening bands didn't suck either, particularly "The Shins" who were quite good, if a bit... "flippant"!

cans't thou heareth me now?

It's been a few years since I've been to a Renaissance Faire, but I'm pretty sure there weren't *quite* as many period-inauthentic tattoos and body piercings peeking out of all the costumes the last time... and I know I didn't see nearly as many people in full garb talking on the cellphone.

what dave's days off are like...

Hung one bathroom cabinet, one IKEA shelf, and four West Elm shelves.

Honestly... I'd really rather go to work... thanks.

(Although I have to say... how anybody ever hung ANYTHING before THIS amazing contraption was invented, I have no idea. Fucking brilliant. Buy one!)

dave was very busy today...

...so he didn't post.

please don't be alarmed.

because 40 gig is just not enough...

I tried to burn a CD yesterday, but my iBook told me it COULDN'T because it had less than 650 Mb of hard-drive space free. Ooops! Time for a good house-cleaning. I discovered that an archive of files and programs called "Old Mac Apps" was taking up 2.1 Gb, so... I think that's going to get burned to a DVD today. I could probably clean out the iTunes folder of downloaded-but-disliked music... not to mention retire some mediocre porn. I should also get rid of the Mac "Developer" tools. It's not like I ever actually write C-programs anymore, even though I like to know I could if I needed to.

I really, really would like a new computer. The problem is... I promised myself I would never buy another iBook. And to do what I want to do is really going to require a PowerBook anyway. (I'd like to be able to run GarageBand and iMovie at decent speeds.) And even a 12" PowerBook is gonna run me $2400 or so. Yeah... it's hard to be a Mac Snob at upgrade time, especially when there's always an ugly Windows laptop at Best Buy for $500.

I'm considering a few options. I could add some RAM, a bigger HD, and a new battery to the iBook for maybe $500 and get another year or so out of it. But hell... for that much money, maybe I should just buy a MacMini to use at home. They are, after all... awfully CUTE!

pant, pant...

Is there a better way to start the day than with a brisk, full out sprint from one's parked car to an arriving train? HOW COULD THERE BE???

It was a rough morning... the boy was up 3 or 4 times during the 3:00 AM to 5:00 AM stretch. I'd hate to be HIS preschool teacher today. After all that I couldn't sleep, so I just got up at 5:15. (I'd hate to be MY preschool teacher today!)

Last night we watched "The Day After Tomorrow". Don't ask me why... the wife has been asking to rent it forever... she seems immune to bad movie reviews for some reason. I mean, she knew it was supposed to be "bad" but she thought it might be kinda "funny bad" or "campy bad". No. It was just plain BAD. Maybe the worst movie I've seen since "Mission to Mars." I'm not sure I've ever seen a movie with less buildup. Five minutes in it's like... "Gee, the weather sure is getting crazy". No effort at all is put into building any suspense... not to mention any sense that any of this is remotely plausible. It's all just a lame excuse to show cities being leveled by tornadoes or frozen or covered in water. And the thing is... it's no longer so much fun to see a major American city covered by water when... you know... a major American city has just been covered by water. (Although the portrayal of the arrogant, stubborn, incompetent government officials comes off as somewhat prescient.)

Oh well... I guess the good thing about Netflix is that when you rent a bad movie, you don't feel like you've actually explicitly paid money to watch it.

tidbits...

* I fucking hate how crowded these trains are. Grr. I always wind up squished in with somebody... that never happened on the Long Island Railroad unless it was rush hour. (This train left NY at 3:45!)

* The closing finally happened on the Alabama House, and the money showed up in our account today. We're going out to dinner tonight... y'know?? Maybe we'll even order a fucking appetizer for the first time since MARCH.

* We got a laser printer in our office today, just for my office-mate and I. Seems like overkill, but I'm not complaining. The fucking thing is FAST!

* The Science Dean is trying to organize a "summit" between the art and science faculty over drinks this Wednesday night. It's a good cause, but two social events in 3 days is a bit much for me. Besides, we've seen what happens when I drink on a school night! And anyway...

* Tomorrow evening is the "Back to School Open House Parents' Night" thing at my daughter's school and we have to go yell at her teacher. I mean... I know it's just 1st grade, and that it's only the 3rd week of school... BUT... we need to make sure that she KNOWS our daughter is reading at a 2nd or 3rd grade level, and that she plans to eventually DO something about it. Uppity parents!! As a former teacher I can tell you first hand... TEACHERS LOVE THAT!!! But if my wife sees another "circle the picture that starts with 'c'" homework come home... I think she may explode.

* One of my students was wearing a "Rush" concert shirt today, and I asked her if it was a true statement of musical interest or an ironic comment of some sort. She replied with a longwinded explanation about it being a sort of Canadian inside joke, and her Dad buying her a Rush album when she was young because she liked one of the songs, and then an ex-boyfriend who used to wear this Rush concert shirt that she would borrow, and the album came out in the year she was born so one day they were "vintage shopping" she saw it and bought one for herself. Ummm... excuse me...? "Vintage???" Jesus... it's not like it was "2112" or something... It was "SIGNALS"!!

a good argument for not drinking on a Monday night...

On days when I have class, I usually wake up at 5:30... leave the house at 6:00... and catch a 6:30 train.

Today I woke up at 6:38.

Oops.

It's not a big deal... I caught a 7:30 train and I'll still be in by 9:00 (class is at 10:00) but it still makes me feel like a bit of a fuck-up. It's not like I was passed out or hung-over or anything... I just forgot to set my alarm.

Anyway... I was going to deliver today's Astro lecture on the blackboard, but at the last minute I decided that a slideshow would be more visually appealing... so I scraped together at 45-slide Keynote presentation out of old lectures... a slide here, a slide there. I've nearly reached critical mass in Astronomy where I have a PowerPoint presentation in the archives with a slide about just about anything I could ever want to teach. It's just a matter of tracking them down and reshuffling them.

So, it's gonna be a whiz-bang astro lecture. Unfortunately my FIRST class is Physics, which is going to be a big problem-solving BORE. Oh well... they can't all be multimedia extravaganzas.

faculty reception + open bar = wheeeeeee!

Shit... I JUST made this train at 7:50. If I hadn't, the next one is at 9:40!! That would have been highly sucky.

As it is, I'm fine. It's surprising how much more bearable a faculty get-together is after a vodka & ginger-ale... and then a rum & coke... I'm beginning to understand why booze was invented. I stopped short of having a third, since I wanted to be able to find the train station. I know... I'm a lightweight... but in all fairness, the only thing I've had to eat since 10:00 AM was an apple.

So, the upshot is I was dangerously close to having "fun" at the thing. It's funny to see your serious academic coworkers get a little liquored up. God, I would never have thought it was possible for the woman who teaches Bio to talk any faster than she normally does, but... get a couple of mixed drinks into her and... ZING!

Not much else of interest today. I finished my grading this morning (yay!) and that's about it. I'm going to be back at this train station in about 12 hours, which is a little depressing. I should have had that third drink and just slept under my desk. I'm going to read some handouts for our next science meeting and call it a night.

afternoon trains...

Heading into work late today... no classes, just a faculty meeting at 4:00. It's weird... you meet a whole different cross section of people. Instead of crabby commuting businesspeople who don't even LOOK at each other, much less talk to one another, you wind up striking up conversations with a grizzled Tom-Waits-type trucker on vacation from California, who is complaining about the prices of mass transit and theatre tickets in NY. (Him and his buddies went to see "Cats" in San Francisco for $50 each. Truckers? At CATS?)

Anyway... luckily he was headed in the opposite direction, or we'd probably be sitting together on the train talking more about drag-racing his truck in California...

But instead, I'm on my train... blogging for the first half hour as usual. I have some grading to do... it's a small stack, but I need to do it today. I plan on being too tired to do it on the way home. The faculty meeting is from 4:00 - 5:15, then we are supposedly having a "welcome the new faculty" reception at some tavern somewhere. I assume there will be drinking. Actually... I'm kinda counting on it.

I didn't blog all weekend, I guess. Not much to say. The village we live in had their annual "Harvest Fest" and parade on Saturday. Our daughter walked in the parade with her school. It was cute. We walked a LOT, actually... from home to the parade dropoff, then downtown for the festival, then back home... pulling 2 kids in a wagon for a lot of it. Between that and the yardwork Sunday (rake, mow, seed, fertilize) I lost a good 5 pounds this weekend. I plan to walk to work today rather than taking the subway to continue the activity trend.

(You know... it occurred to me the other day... not only does getting back to NYC mean that I'm walking more... I bet the actual ACT of teaching burns a considerable number of calories compared to just sitting at a desk all day. I mean, lecturing isn't exactly "aerobic"... but it involves a fair amount of movement and activity. At least, moreso than... click... click... click............. click...)

Watched the Emmy's last night. No big surprises. Yay for Jon Stewart and for "Lost". Also for Felicity Huffman. (Love her... she's "smoky".) Letterman's tribute to Johnny Carson was nice and heartfelt (for HIM anyway) but I couldn't help but wonder... "Hmm... wonder how LENO feels about this??" Unfortunately the cameraman never cut to him. Anyway, nothing too exciting. There weren't even many eye-popping dresses to gawk at. (Actually I think the person who looked hottest was probably Naveen Andrews, who plays Sayid on "Lost." I would totally do him.)

In other TV news, the fall premieres are starting to roll out. Not too impressed with "Survivor" so far. Why bring back two moderately-popular losers from last season? Bobby-John?? I'm sorry, but just the name alone should disqualify him from being on television. Hanging on for the "Lost" premiere... we Netflicked disc 7 of the first-season boxed set last week and watched all of the extras, so we're all geared up now. The wife is all excited about "Desperate Housewives" and I'm looking forward to "Gray's Anatomy". (It's a little heavy-handed and earnest, but I think I'm developing a crush on Sandra Oh). We'll watch "ER" and "West Wing" for a few weeks out of habit... but I suspect that this will be the season we give up on both of them. But all in all, our nightly TV menu is pretty full. It was probably a dumb time to start Netflix, huh?

Uhhhh... what else...? (I can't stop writing or I'll have to start grading papers!)

This old man just tried to swat a bee that's been flying around the train. The bee is now wounded and angry!

I saw this chick at the train station whose WRIST was pierced. Not like... top to bottom, Jesus-syle, but like... along the top where you would wear a wristwatch there were two balls about an inch apart, connected, one would assume, by a GIANT METAL BAR EMBEDDED DEEP IN THE FLESH OF HER ARM!!! God, I thought working with Greenwich Village college-kids had me pretty used to all manner of freaky body piercings, but this thing made me woozy. That can't be safe. There has to be a risk of permanent nerve damage if somebody fucks that up. I'm trying very hard NOT to imagine the act of getting such a piercing and the length and width of needle required, and the tortured screams that must fill the room...

Excuse me while I get myself a drink of cool water...

Ah.

OK. I should go grade or something now...