cannot stand.

i cannot stand the way u act...i cannot stand the way u flirt arnd guys...especially him...i cannot stand the way u tink u are that busy and others are not...i cannot stand the way u ignore me...i seriously seriously cannot stand the way u tried to pass me a case...yet its "too complicated" that u took it back...ok lor..fine...let ur list of cases be 21 and above...then suit ur age mah....i cannot stand the way u treated me like dirt....

i seriously dun care for anyone much...if they dont matter to me ba....not that u matter alot to me...we have some in common...we have lots in uncommon too....we click well sometimes...i dislike u sometimes too...recently especially...argh!!

warning: dont ever ever treat a scorpio gal like that..or shld i say...dont every treat ME lidat....

okie..fine...i cannot stand the way i am now...fine!

i tink i need a more fulfilling weekend.

coming back to work on a sunday....is boring....cant get my beauty sleep....not enuff...and tmr is monday again...sianz....

ytd went to celebrate ken bday in advance...the gf is a great planner...coz she planned kbox lunch!! wee!! initially needa go bukit timah hill to rankee for RC de...but was cancelled..so i tot can surprise her by reaching on time lar...but...apparently...i still overslept...=P at least i went rite? hahaha...=x but think the bfs were abit sianz?? duno leh...my own feelings lar..hahaha....lucky i got no bf..wahaha...=P cut-cake time was cool....wahaha..shant elaborate..arbo later the gf kill me...hehehe.....cant wait to get the photos and videos frm miao miao....wahahah=P

after kbox...we went bowling...bought socks lar...i suggested bowling to the planner the day before...then i wear slippers lar...bah!! waste money buy socks...boo~~ anyway, first casualty was jac lar...who ask her to grow her nails..wahahah..=P guess wad...next casualty is me lar...so cannot say other ppl de....bah!! have to clip away lor...almost got a more heavy casualty...bowling ball drop on the floor before it went rolling down the lane...phew! nvr swing too hard...so nvr fly back..wahaha....hmm..not me wor..=x total...played 3 games...first game was high...couples v.s singles plus one half-single lar...=P then couples li hai lor..got love power mah.....then towards 3rd game...everyone was tired and hungry le....no energy to play liao...wan to faster finish it..wahaha...tink at most wan to bowling...can onli bowl 2 games ba..haha...

after bowling..went dinner at sumo house....newly opened at clementi i tink...duno whether is it different frm sumo-ya...the one near the arcade de...but i tink its different...coz the portions and the servings were different ba....but anyway, its cheap lar...=P tt is enuff liao...hehe....

walked arnd clementi....realised that if too long nvr walk clementi..then suddenly go walk arnd...got things to buy de wor...best if there's sale lar..=P wahaha...so i bought a pair of pants at bossini! hehe....cheap cheap....coz 50% wor...usual price was $43...which i doubt i will even look at it ba..=P good thing is...even during sales period..they still offer FREE alteration!! wahaha...but i kinda like bossini pants...got my size lar...then got free alteration lar...cool and sweet!! hehe....tink im in the mood for shopping liao...=P

had a bubble tea break...at sweet talk lor..but the standard darn drop until jialat lar....last time buy was $1 and very very sweet...i wished that it was not-that-sweet....this time buy was $1.20...well..it was not that sweet le lor....or shld i say...its not sweet at all lar...wahaha..and the pearls are so miserly....sianz...i eat the pearls and threw the rest of the tea away...=P hahaha...spent quite alot ytd i can say..=x

now at office working..later gng imm....was tinking of gng to get some working clothes frm Bega...my "fave" working-clothes shop lar...wahahah....coz got discount card mah...=P

ok lar..enuff crap.....shall go finish my work fast...and shopping..here i come!

p.s: i still tink i need a more fulfilling weekend...

relief.

im really glad we had that late nite "chat"....i seriously tink....if u cant even figure out whether im still your fren anot....then dont bother having that kind of reaction when u see the 2 of us tgt okie...haha...coz the whole world knows that u are still waiting for her....she's all that u need....she's the one that u dream of....she's the one that wake up tinking of....so....go get her!! dilly dally for 2 years...wad kind of guy are u!!! duhz!! ok lar....back to the topic where...im glad that we had that "chat"...coz...u cant even figure out whether we are still frens anot...i know the line-not-to-cross...but cant help wondering "why that reaction?"...hmmm...nvm...its over...wahaha....

i heaved a sigh of relief....u can actually say "no feeling" towards me...haha...so...i am relieved...no more hope...on the other hand...still a bit upset lar...wahaha...contradicting lar..i know...as usual lar...but i can definitely say im a more carefree person now?? coz at least i have other "diversions"?? i know im bad...but well..since they start teasing...so might as well play along with it....i dun tink he will mind rite? =P

"eh..ur boyfriend come back frm appt liao..."

"eh...where's ur lao gong?"

hmmm....we have promoted frm the colleague-colleague to the boyfriend-girlfriend to the husband-wife le!! wahaha...we skipped the fiance-fiancée stage le...hmm...so wad's next?? seperated....then divorced.....not bad hor....

weird though...im enjoying it...wahaha....u seem to be enjoying it too hor...we are so farnie!!! but i gotta admit...i love teaching u chinese...pay me money lar...i teach u...faster than the stupid cheena teacher that kept speaking and writing in chinese lar....=P i got the dedication u know...dedicated tcher de leh...=P wakakaka...

sorry i used u as a life buoy.....for the time being...tt's the only way now that i can manage my feelings better....=x

im loving it.

i love the way u act...or shld i say...i love the way u REact...hahaha...no...it doesnt give me hope again...but i do wonder whether it realli matters to u anot...im not the one who have seen ur face....its them....so...when they say ur face immediately turn black when u know that we are at the back...is that true? i realli wan to see that face sia...well...i tink i saw....hahaha...was looking at u frm outside the server room remember? ur face was dark.....maybe the room was dark hor...or maybe...he was just beside me? hahaha...u are a weird guy....tt's all i can say....i love the way u REact...

i love the way u treated me...although i know its just an office joke...haha...but well...u needa improve on the treat-gals-nicer way lar...u are such a heck-care person sia...hmmm....dun tell me that im.....hmmm....nah im not! wahaha...gotcha! im not rite?? hmmm...shurks!

i love the dancing ...hippy hoppy...wahaha....but my knees hurt...my legs wobbly....my hands shaking...my stomach crampy....win liao lar...wad a "torture"...4th lesson only...and its the 3rd dance le lar...how to catch up...plus...i dun practise at hme lar...weird sia...i tink i will try to remember the steps ba..=x but no matter how cheam...i always love it...the sweating...the breathlessness....ha! already tinking of signing up next class le sia...but i tink i need to have the musicality in me sia...shurks...duno how to groove~~ duno how to body wave~~~ jialat~~ wakaka...

i love shopping at malaysia...IF i got money lar~~ =P will go in after payday...wee!! TLC was asking "why u say 'go in' de?"..hmm..duno...coz im a singaporean...so when i go malaysia...i use 'go in'?? then when come back...i use 'come back' lor...hahaha...

i love OT...bah!! duhz!! ok lar...when im busy...i love it...but too busy....sigh...stress until outbreak! wahaha.....tmr gotta go back office lar...so well....

ok lar...enuff of love liao....not enuff love to spread arnd....

i loving it....i love u....=P hahaha...

ciao...

am i a scorpio?

thanks cindy for helping me to find my horoscope wor...but....the engrish too cheam...i dun understand sia..wahaha...how true? duno lor...wahahah...

Scorpio, you rule the eighth house of the chart, which is associated with other people's money, possessions, and values, as well as wealth received through inheritance; it also describes how and to what extent we commit, and bond with our partner, both on a sexual and emotional level. Yours is a fixed sign, which means that you are steadfast in adversity. Once you put your mind to something, you display self-discipline and staying power. You work stoically to achieve your goals - no matter the cost!
Dear Scorpio your strengths lie in your ability to confront and channel powerful emotions and profound insights. With your great tenacity and willpower, you are well suited to positions of authority, thanks also to your firm sense of responsibility, your strategical approaches, and your charismatic aura. thank
Your sign is that of intense Scorpio, the eighth sign of the zodiac, best characterized by passion, intensity, and emotionality. You are considered to be the most powerful and extreme sign of the zodiac, because you deal with the process of fundamental transformation on all levels.
Pluto is your ruler, Scorpio, and is known as the planet of permanent change and transformation. It is also associated with sex, the life cycle of birth and death, and regeneration.
You are the second of the three water signs. Pluto's influence makes you a charismatic, yet enigmatic person. While you may appear serene on the surface, you contain a magnetic intensity and powerfully hypnotic personality, belied only by a penetrating stare of deep intelligence.

You do have weaknesses, too! You can be blunt and demanding, and at worst, you may become merciless, obsessive, and manipulative. You are known for your passive-aggressive behavior, which sometimes reveals your proclivity for martyrdom. You also run the risk of displaying destructive, and revengeful behavior, which confirms your radical all-or-nothing approach to life.

JB day!

its JB day today!! was tired and dont feel like wakin up this morning lar...but somehow..did not regret going afterall...=P i enjoyed myself....

met up with jac and est at bb mrt first..then head to kranji...filled in the white card..so mafan...need to keep writing "singapore"....reach kranji...not many ppl leh...we find it quite weird..hahaha...but anyway, boarded 170...singapore custom...clear...malaysia custom...clear too....hmmm.....too clear until we find it weird..coz its a sunday today mah...=p but well...no human traffic is good lar...we can shop more!

first stop was F.O.S...and jac was the first to buy something lar...weird wordings on the t-shirt though...hahahaha....but nice lar..=P =x found out that the guys were more dilly-dally than gals lar...finaly, we went for brunch...marrybrown...chicken rice..=_=!! hmm...not realli a fan of marrybrown i can say....after that...we just walked arnd lor...kinda like shoes frm Summit...too bad singapore only got 1 outlet in suntec lar...haha...so well...when i go jb next time...i shall go see Summit shoes...bought a pair of black shoes...rather nice i tink...but its the last pair..one side was display piece..the other was not...so....the display piece was the comfortable one...but the not-display piece was the tight one...duhz! i tink im more comfortable wearing shoes that are worn by other ppl lar....coz its has been worn many times..so more comfy lar...=_=!!! but anyway, although the other piece was abit tight...the sales person managed to convince me that after waering a few times, then it will be looser lar...so...i bought it...i needed a pair of shoes too ba...and its cheap ba~~

went for bubble tea break...but the ppl working there look so sian...i also feel sian after seeing their faces sia..duhz! anyway, the bubble tea not nice and expensive lar...roibo...dun go there next time le..=P anyway, comforted myself...by buying pretzel..wakaka...cheap cheap too...choco mint flavour...one thing that i will nvr buy in singapore ba...=P satisfied sia....

then we went to holiday inn?? duno wad that place is called...zf they all called it holiday inn leh...took cab there...kinda cheap too?? tink got quite alot of things to shop too..but we nvr realli walked...haha...saw alot of hair salons lar...and i mean ALOT lar!!! can go there cut hair next time de...smelled damn-nice tea egg!! wahaha...but onli i know how to appreciate lar....heavenly smell~~ some went to get some "dao sa pia" stuffs...something that i wouldnt know how to appreciate lar..=P hahaha..

then we went the something sri something that place to eat dinner..wahaha...cant remember the place name still...onli remember the "sri" in the middle nia...ate a full dinner...got stingray lar..kangkong lar...another-type-of-vege-which-i-cant-rem-the-name lar....hotplate tofu lar...salad you tiao lar...some-meaty-thingy-which-i-cant-rem-name-too lar....and got "hei po" lar...cch almost bite off the shell!! tink we can all agree that the "hei po" is nice lar..=P although it cost RM$75...quite ok ba...i guess...we get to eat 3 each?? but est eat at the expense of getting some rashes lar...=_=!!! sacrificing sia~~

full dinner...and tink each of us paid like RM$25.20?? hahaha...cool manz!!! and jac still can say "durian for supper?"...shocking manz...but we didnt eat lar...all so full le...hahaha...and its like 8plus le?? so we took cab back to the custom there...outside ramly burger where est bought for her brother...wonder wad's nice abt that burger leh...hehe...

well...dun tink i left out anything ba?? hmmm...i enjoyed myself lar...for the x-number of times that im saying...shall we go again next mth?? =P this mth's out...im broke!!! wahahaha...but i love it manz....

did i mentioned that the gals are crazy abt earrings?? 3 pairs for RM$10 is like so cheap lar....duno?? can spend so long browsing lar...maybe wait till i got earholes lar...then maybe i'll join in too lar...=P hahaha...duno when~~~ wait lor~~

im tired....and surprised that it didnt realli bring my mind to u...good...im starting to let go le....but if i still mentioned anything abt u....it is still becoz i "bu gan xin"....u heartless freak!! wahahaha!!! sound so rough leh...hmmm...cbb...

looking forward to the next trip!

i tink i've had enough.

had an interesting evening on thursday...had a nice dinner...although its SO filling...well..i didnt have to cook lar...=P but the after-session was good..=P hmmm.....pondering still....i tink i shld slowly let go le.....not easy....but hope its not hard....

realised that hip hop class brings me out of all those misery thoughts...im glad...realli had no time to tink of misery sia...coz the music was just sooo hip! wahaha..learned a new dance....and tcher gotta catch a flight...so class ended abit earlier... tcher was wearing this cool singlet that says "addicted to fucking"...=_=!!! cool ba...

im glad that there's also u to talk with me....or maybe...u were listening to me talk...hahah...but u let me know ur thoughts too...i know that i shld have done what i shld...but well...saying it is always easier than doing it lar...give me some time ba...i hope the "some" time is short....=x anyway, thanks....also for the lift hme...

u asked her to watch fireworks...of coz...she said ok...im a selfish person...i tagged along for dinner...and realised...its realli weird to be a lightbulb afterall...then...i asked u and u said "no thanks"....of coz...i will feel hurt....will wonder why....i see the picture...she's happy...i tink u are too....that hard to even go out with me now?? haha....ok lar....all i can reply is "ok ba".....and we talk no more.....maybe u are trying to give me a hint that i shld stay away frm u....or maybe u are trying to stay away frm me....maybe~

still...im still looking for someone to watch with me....=P yet...i would like to watch a movie...hopefully it will not clash lor....i might just give up the fireworks for the movie again....just becoz an "old man" saying he's old already...hahaha....weirdo lar.....too old to watch movie....but not old to watch later timeslots of movie...bleh...=P

im just an underage immature gal....with no hope of such stuffs again...and looking forward to nothing too....i tink i've had enough le....boy...i sound old!! let me flip this page of my life-book.....and start all over again....thank u....

im in depression.

happy national day.

work on a public holiday...how "fun"....wahaha...

well..at least after the work...we had dinner at bugis....went V8 Cafe...hmm...ordered their chicken baked rice...apparently..they are not skilled in cooking rice lar...bleh....hard hard de....tink i will stick to eating spaghetti next time i go there ba...=x hehe.....

after that...we went swensens to eat giant earthquake...yum yum....played with the leftovers..=x

its weird how i can see the difference between the 2 of u....the way he asked whether it matters when the others were all teasing abt us...i said its ok arh....coz its teasing only....and he said that's good....tt's the difference.....he dont give false hope??? tt's good....=) but still...i missed u....although still...u arent worth being missed....=x haha...

7C's of Happiness.

THE 7 C's of HAPPINESS

What are the critical ingredients for experiencing genuine happiness? Here are seven elements of life that I believe are essential to the attainment of human happiness. I call them the "7 C's in the pursuit of happiness." One is not more important than any of the others.

1) Compassion. In order to evolve into a state of happiness, you must develop your in-born ability to care about life, to value life in all its forms, to engage in loving, kind actions, to cultivate an attitude of what Nobel laureate, Dr. Albert Schweitzer called "reverence for life," (including your own).

2) Contentment. Inner calm and peace of mind and heart does not mean acceptance of everything that happens. It does mean letting go of fear. When you live life fearlessly, you experience a kind of peace that permeates every cell of your body, every thought of your mind, every emotion of your heart, every element of your spirit.

3) Connection. Without effectively connecting to other humans, you become less than human yourself. Connection means involving yourself in relationship to everyone around you, connecting to your own inner life, and becoming aware of the environment in which you live. Learn to create high-quality relationships, and your happiness is almost guaranteed.

4) Communication. Communication is our primary method for connection. It increases your knowledge, your understanding, and your awareness. Language is precious. Words are the building blocks of all happiness.

5) Commitment. Oprah Winfrey says that what motivates her to get up in the morning is "my commitment to my life and fulfilling my life purpose." If one of your life's purposes is to enhance your happiness, committing your life to the service of others brings more happiness than you can imagine. Happiness requires you commit yourself to something larger than yourself.

6) Consciousness. Most spiritual teachers believe we are living in a sleep-like or dream state. In order to be happy, one must increase one's awareness of life. And the single awareness that is most conducive to happiness is: the impermanence of everything. Life is in a constant state of flux, of change, of rhythm and of evolution.

7) Creativity. Creating your life experience by consciously choosing your thoughts, your actions, your decisions and your attitudes will allow you to attain personal happiness regardless of external circumstances.The pursuit of happiness is not something you search for or attain from outside your skin.

Happiness develops from within. You were born to be happy. You were given life to experience happiness. Pursuing it is your right. Sail the 7 C's of happiness and the pursuit of it becomes obvious and being alive becomes the happiest of moments.

messy fireworks?

went to np WIL ceremony...rather meaningful until i almost teared becoz of wad the students said...-_-!!! weak~ after that...we ate yong tau foo at canteen 1...pretty cool....drank the 40cents soya bean milk too...school food is so cheap lor...sigh......

then went suntec to walk...realli walk awhile only...then went back office...wanted to do some work...but ended up playing psp...=x and didnt managed to save my level coz no time...have to chiong down to marina to meet up with the gang...watched Click...quite funny...then towards the end....rather touching...almost teared....then evil jac start looking at who is crying...hahaha..hmm..i wont want to have a universal remote control ba...seems scary..........

after movie..went dinner at swensens...ate the chicken baked rice for the first time i tink...still tink the hk cafe that one is better leh...but duno why jun, val and miao can condemn it until so jialat...

anyways...we went to watched the fireworks...by italy de...i find it messy wor...but i still like it...very crowded as usual lar...but very fun...we played arnd...took photos and our best cch...took video of the fireworks!! so i wan to get frm him...tink he said its 600mb...-_-!!! but i enjoyed myself...managed to get a ride frm zf to clementi lar...but the wait at the carpark was half hr lar..hahahaha...still better than this year's new year that time....tink we waited for a whole 1 hr then...

but this fireworks seem so long le....the last fireworks i watched was with u i tink....very sweet...the best spot i guess...i missed those times actually...why does all these have to happen? is it really becoz of me?? i blew it?? sigh...i cant help but kept tinking lar...especially if u were to be with her....especially if u can feel so comfortable with her....which affects me very badly...i guess i needed the assurance and u didnt gave me?? suspicious is inevitable...coz u can feel so comfortable with her...yet...ur tone of voice can change so much...or maybe...others arent that affected?? i really duno sia...i tried not to tink...but seems like everywhere i go...it tends to remind me of u....

i was jealous....really jealous le....when i realised that u actually asked her to the next fireworks...and u onli asked me "how's the fireworks today?".....sobz...

im not the strong ger that ppl tot i am...as my tears flow easier when it comes to u....can practically say that my whole mind is full liao....full of u....bah! tt's bad?

typed out this whole chunk of stuffs abt u...but decided not to post it...in case someone related realli sees it...ha! but overall, the rough picture was "how open-minded can a gal be? to the extent of holding hands and kissing in public..with a normal guy fren? one that u dont even know whether u are interested in?" tink abt it...i accept long draggy answers (with examples) frm anyone...wahaha...just drop me an email...

enuff said....cannot take it again...sianz..sigh..

hip hop.

i was pissed!!!!!!!

but lucky there's u....i finally have someone to talk to....thanks alot...

went for my hip hop class finally....was cool...but tiring and sweating...and shaky....physically hands and legs shaking sia...wahaha...hip hop was fast...so hard to catch the steps sia....omg! but it was fun...the music was nice...very cool indeed....

a guy and a gal went for a walk after dinner...and her nick goes "nite walk has eaten up my sadness" --> what will this sentence mean to u?? haha...well...the nite walk with that guy definitely eaten up her sadness lor...wakakaka....

give me back my self-confidence.

blogged a long entry abt my feelings and stuffs...but stupid IE...stupid stupid...make my mood worse....

conclusion...i know im worth being treasured lar...maybe not by u....maybe its by u....if its by u...the way u treasure me...is definitely different sia...=_=!! dun wan to tink liao ba...if u wan to ignore me...i cant do anything too...like i always said....u are the one making the "choices" and "decisions"....i dont get to make anything! its all up to u...weird? suan le....hmmp....

but if can realli suan le...i realli wan to suan le sia...=_= talk big nia....chey...

i wish u can give me back my self-confidence.....stop playing arnd with them will ya? sigh...