Found this damn funny joke over on the web... on one forum... sgclub... damn funny... u guys enjoy reading... some got simple translation... some dun haf... guess u all can translate urselves bah... haha... enjoy.. peace!
白羊座 (Aries)
妈妈经常叮嘱羊羊： "穿裙子时不可以荡秋千；不然，会被小男生看到里面的小内裤哦！ " 有一天，羊羊高兴地对妈妈说： " 今天我和小明比赛荡秋千，我赢了！ " 妈妈生气地说： " 不是告诉过你吗？穿裙子时不要荡秋千！ " 羊羊骄傲地说： "可是我好聪明哦！我把里面的小内裤脱掉了，这样他就看不到我的小内裤了！ " （勇敢直率、敢做敢为的白羊） Mum always tell sheep sheep : wear skirt ah, cannot play the swing wor.. if not later those boi boi can see what is inside leh! one day, sheep sheep happily told mummy: today ah, i have a competition with xiaoming on the swing. And... I win!! Mummy was damn angry and said : i thought i told u, wear skirt cannot play swing la! sheep sheep yet proudly say: But i very clever leh! I take off my underwear le. So that xiaoming cannot see my underwear! (brave, dare to do dare to admit de sheep)
金牛座 (Taurus)
卖瓜小贩： "快来吃西瓜，不甜不要钱！ " 饥渴的牛牛： "哇！太好了，老板，来个不甜的！ " （持家、想出轨又顾全自己的金牛） watermellon vendor: come and buy watermelon ah... not sweet foc wor..! thirsty de cow : wa! so good! Boos, i want not sweet one hor! (Anyone can help me with this? LOL)
双子座 (Gemini)
妈妈叫双双起床：" 快点起来！公鸡都叫好几遍了！ " 双双说： " 公鸡叫和我有什么关系？我又不是母鸡！ " （自我意识强烈、自行思维的双子） Mama ask twintwin to get up of bed: faster wake up ah! the male chicken called alot of time le leh! twintwin say: What has it got to do with me when the male chicken called? Im not a female chicken also mah! (Anyone can help me with this?)
巨蟹座 (Cancer)
公车上，蟹蟹说：" 今晚我要和妈妈睡！" 妈妈问道：" 你将来娶了媳妇也和妈妈睡阿？ " 蟹蟹不假思索： "嗯！ " 妈妈又问： " 那你媳妇怎么办？" 蟹蟹想了半天，说：" 好办，让她跟爸爸睡！ " 妈妈： "！＠＃＄％?＆＊（ ......-" 再看爸爸，已经热泪盈眶啦！ （恋母情结、依恋的巨蟹） on the bus, crab say : i want sleep with mummy tonite! mummy say : then when you are married, you still want to sleep with mummy meh? crab say : Yeah! mummy say: then your wife how? crab say: easy la. Ask her to sleep with daddy lor! mummy :@#$%^&@#$%^& and mummy look at daddy, already excited till cry le! (dunno oso)
狮子座 (Leo)
狮狮去参加奶奶的寿宴。到了吃寿包的时候，狮狮问：" 我们为什么要吃这种像屁股的寿包？ " 众人听了脸色大变。 接著狮狮拨开寿包，看看里面的豆沙，说： " 奶奶，快看！里面还有大便！ " 众人晕的晕，吐的吐。 （以自我感受、不怕旁人眼光的骄傲的狮子） lion went to granny birthday party, when its turn to eat the birthday bun, lion ask: why must we eat this type of bun that looks like a butt? Everyone face turn white after hearing this. And, lion open the bun, and take alook at the ingredient inside and say.. Granny, see see! inside is shit lor.. Everyone fainted and vomitted. ()
处女座 (Virgo)
处处对肚脐很好奇，就问爸爸。 爸爸把脐带连著胎儿与母体的道理简单地讲了一下，说： "婴儿离开母体之后，医生把脐带减断，并打了一个结，後来就成了肚脐。 " 处处： "那医生为什么不打个蝴蝶结？ " （好奇心强又追求完美的处女） (anyone help me translate this? )
天秤座 (Libra)
父亲对天天说： "今天不要上学了，昨晚．．．你妈给你生了两个弟弟。你给老师说一下就行了。 " 天天却回答： " 爸爸，我只说生了一个；另一个，我想留著下星期不想上时再说！ " （聪明、权衡利弊的天平） father tell tian tian: today you don't need to go to sch le. Because yesterday your mum gave birth to two little brother, you gave 1 to teacher can le. tiantian ask: daddy, i tell teacher mum only gave birth to one. Den another one, next week when i dont feel like going to sch then i say! (clever, .........................)
Quote Of The Day: A certain amount of opposition is a great help to a man; it is what he wants and must have to be good for anything. Hardship and opposition are the native soil of manhood and self-reliance.
Feeling Of The Day: Good...
Joke Of The Day: ^^^^^^^^ it's on top... haha... enjoy...
Signing off, Chris
6:15 PM
Haiz... can't really get to slp man... i also dunno y... maybe is becoz dun need to go work tmr bah... toking abt work... friday was my last day! and i onli get to know it on tt day itself... i was like WTF!!! how come so sudden wan!! on friday... it was like any other working day for me... i went to work as usual... reach the office ard 8.45... den start with my usual routine... den my senior Alvin came telling me... "hey... heard today is ur last day ar??" i was like "??"... "wat u mean?? y today my last day??" (i tot i did something wrong lor... tot they wanna sack me... damn stun sia)... but dun really care about it... and continue doing my stuffs... not long after tt... my supervisor Elson came and asked me to help him with some packing... on the way... he tell me that... "ur agent got call u??" i asked y? den he say the same thing as wat Alvin say... this time... it makes me more stunned!!! den he continued... "actually at first... we wanna find someone who can work for 6 months... but the agent say they cannot find anyone... but they say got one temp can work for 2 months... ask if we want anot... we agreed and took u in... but now ur agent say they have found someone who can work for 6 months... therefore they will find u another job and get the person to work for us..." after hearing that... it makes me more angry... y didn't they (the agent) call me to tell mi before hand...!!! argh!!! after lunch tt day... went to see the HR staff... den the tell mi it's not my fault... i did not do anything wrong... etc... (sad i angry) but i say i was not angry with them... i am beri angry with the agent... they did not call mi... to tell mi before hand!! den i get the HR staff to help mi get the agent to call mi... after settling everything... the agent promise to hlp mi find a more better job... *let's hope so*...haiz... damn disappointed man! tmr still need to go back to the company to get them sign the timesheet... if not i cannot get my money... haiz... den still have to go back to the agent there... haiz... maybe i go sleep first... if not tmr cannot wake up... take care guys... choaz... peace!
Below are some photos taken...
I like the above two banner alot... they are quite meaningful
Lunch Break area...
Nice hiding place... with nice scenery... haha...
The project noticeboard...
The tape machine...
Guess where is the place with the arrow pointing... Yes... Singapore Changi Airport...
Quote Of The Day: Life is something that happens when you can't get to sleep.
Feeling OF The Day: Haiz... Disappointing man...
Joke Of The Day: Waiting for bus
A woman got a problem with her closet door - it was felling every time a bus was passing by. So she called a repair man. The repairman comes and sees that indeed, the door falls out every time when a bus passes by. "OK, I am gonna see what is going on, just close the door behind me" and he stepps into the closet. At that time the husband comes from work, opens the closet and finds the repairman. Husband: "What the hell are you doing here!"Repairman:"Well, you are not going to believe it, but I am waiting for a bus!"
Signing off, Chris
12:32 AM
Monday, August 18, 2008
Well.. started work today... first day feel like a nerd man... dunno anithing.. haha... somemore dunno wat to do... can say tt today i almost seated there most of the time... lolz... really can rite? haha... normally tt's the first day bah i guess... frm tmr onwards will be having more stuffs for me to do liao... i really hope so.. haha... heard frm one of my senior whu i am attached to say tt tmr he will give me practical lesson... haha... let's see wat will i do tmr... lolz... the equipment there are damn damn heavy... 20-30kg for one... and it can cost up to $20,000 for one of it... which means u can buy a car with the price of tt... omg... but luckily... the whole warehouse is air-conditional!!! haha... dun need to scare of heat... lolz.... it's kinda cold there lar... keep feeling of going to toliet... btw... toliet is damn far away frm my workspace... need to pass by the so call "lady boss" de room... so pai seh lor... keep walking pass... haha... bo bian i wanna wee wee mar... hahahahaha... heard tt need to do quite alot of things there... but if u finish the job fast... den u can rest early... haha... and slack... :D oh ya... i also have my own workstation... haha... took photo of it... lolz.. super tired now man... going to take a cooling bath and den head back to my bed to have a good nite slp... damn tired... haha... take care guys... choaz... peace!
Yeah!! tt's my workstation... cool rite? haha...
Quote Of The Day: Well done is better than well said.
Feeling Of The Day: Super Tired...
Joke Of The Day: Bush and Hussein Joke
Saddam Hussein called President Bush and said, "George, I had a wonderful dream last night. I could see America, the whole country, and on each house I saw a banner."
"What did it say on the banners?" Mr. Bush asked.
Saddam replied, "LONG LIVE SADDAM HUSSEIN."
Mr. Bush responded, "You know, Saddam, I am really happy you called. Last night I had a similar dream. I could see all of Baghdad, and it was more beautiful than ever. It had been rebuilt completely, and on each house flew an enormous banner."
"What did the banners say?" Saddam asked.
"I don't know," replied Mr. Bush, "I can't read Hebrew."
Signing off, Chris
8:37 PM
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Another Sunday afternoon... just came back from a movie... went to watch Meet Dave at E-hub with Guanwei... all i can say tt it's awesome!! a very nice show indeed... hmm... gonna give it 4 stars... so dun wait... go catch the movie!! lolz... have been like watching movie for the past three weeks straight... lolz... spend quite alot on movie... but nvm... as wat the chinese say... 有出才有进... i believe wat it says... hahaha...
well... gonna start work frm tmr onwards... wun have the time to come online so often already... except on Saturday and Sunday bah... :) gonna miss my com i guess... haha... Well... there's a show i tink u guys shd watch... able to watch it online... it's call 篮球火 aka Hot Shot... it's a very nice show indeed... casting... Jerry Yan, Wu Zun, Luo Zhi Xiang... it's a very nice and comdey show... make u laugh non-stop... especially the basketball stuns in the show... it's damn damn nice... it will definatly catch most of ur attention... anw gonna go catch the third episode of it... take care guys... choaz... peace!
Quote Of The Day: Inspiration is wonderful when it happens, but the writer must develop an approach for the rest of the time... The wait is simply too long.
Feeling Of The Day: Great!!
Joke Of The Day: Boss Joke A guy phones up his Boss, but gets the bosses' wife instead. "I'm afraid he died last week." she explains. The next day the man calls again and asks for the boss. "I told you" the wife replies, "he died last week." The next day he calls again and once more asks to speak to his boss. By this time the wife is getting upset and shouts, "I'VE ALREADY TOLD YOU TWICE, MY HUSBAND, YOUR BOSS, DIED LAST WEEK! WHY DO YOU KEEP CALLING?" "Coz," he replied laughing, "I just love hearing it..."
Signing off, Chris
3:59 PM
Saturday, August 16, 2008
OMG... saw this video in youtube... it is damn funny lor... u guys take a look.. haha... enjoy... peace!
Signing off, Chris
11:08 PM
HAHAHA!!! FYP finally over!!! so happy sia... the long waited holiday is finally here... lolz... found myself a part time job with the help of recruit express... went for the interview on thursday and it was successful... going to start work straight this coming monday... which means no break for me... haha... nvm... work den earn more money... den can spend more... lolz... today is like any other saturday... woke up kinda early today... i also dunno y... took my breakfast den was my show time... lolz... after all the shows... clean up the tank for xiao hui and pudding boy... haha... they are damn cute... but cleaning two tanks at a time is damn ma fan... lolz... but nvm... coz i am the wan whu wanna keep them... so no compliants... after cleaning up them... it's time for me to clean myself up... lolz... by the time it's ard 4 liao... time past without u knowing huh... haiz... turn on my com... actually wanted to download my shows online... but the internet not working... i was like "WTF!!" how come not working!!! argh....!!! made a call to singnet... the guy over the phone asked me to switch off the modem and turn on again... den pull out the cable frm the modem and behind cpu den plug in again... (it's the way to test which is faulty) but... haiz.. still cannot work... den he say he will help mi make an appointment for their technican to come down to troubleshoot on the problem... when i heard tt... i was thinking... "WTF! if need to pay how!!" den i asked if need to pay... the guy say if it's their side de fault den i dun need to pay... if it's soemthing wrong on my side... den i have to pay... no choice... internet still cannot work so agree to let the technican come down... the appointment is next tuesday lor... damn flare up den... cannot use the internet... so when to play my PC games... tillard 6+... i still dun believe it cannot work... try the internet again... to my surprise! it finally work!! lolz... so happy... just now call them back to cancel the appointment... so worries liao... finally can use!! lolz.. btw... below of some other photos of pudding boy and a house i made for him... lolz...
below is the lab tt i did my project deployment in... see... all the com with the screen on tgt... damn nice... lolz... anwgonna go makan dinner liao... take care guys... peace!
Quote Of The Day: Procrastination isn't the problem, it's the solution. So procrastinate now, don't put it off.
Feeling Of The Day: Fine...
Joke Of The Day: At The Convention
A man had to attend a large convention in Chicago. On this particular trip he decided to bring his wife. When they arrived at their hotel and were shown to their room, the man said: "You rest here while I register - I'll be back within an hour." The wife lies down on the bed... just then, an elevated train passes by very close to the window and shakes the room so hard she's thrown out of the bed. Thinking this must be a freak occurrence, she lies down once more. Again a train shakes the room so violently, she's pitched to the floor. Exasperated, she calls the front desk, asks for the manager. The manager says he'll be right up. The manager (naturally) is skeptical but the wife insists the story is true. "Look,... lie here on the bed - you'll be thrown right to the floor!" So he lies down next to the wife... Just then the husband walks in. "What," he says, "are you doing here?" The manager replies: "Would you believe I'm waiting for a train?"
Signing off, Chris
7:30 PM
Saturday, August 09, 2008
Hehehe... it's Saturday nite... and it's National Day today... take this opportunity to wish all a HAPPY NATIONAL DAY!!! Every year de national day is almost like the same... just stay at home watch the national day perade... lolz... but at least the weather is good... kinda rainy... and can see lightning and hear thunder every now and then... Well... ytd went to adopt a cute pudding hamster frm my online fren at punggol... haha... kinda cute... a male hamster which is light brown in colour... and i have given him the name pudding boy... haha... below are two photos of him... Kawaii neh... lolz...
toking abt punggol... omg... the place is damn ulu man!! went there by MRT... but took bus back... the bus like keep turning ard in punggol before i finally see SengKang... haiz... After collecting pudding boy... went to Downtown East E-Hub to buy movie tickets for the new 3D movie... Journey to the Center of the Earth... a very nice show indeed... it's rather an adverturous movie... alot of surprises... and it's fun... it giving the movie 4 stars out of 5... really a nice movie to catch... :D after buying the tickets... went back home to "house" pudding boy first... as the show starts at 9pm... so too my dinner at home first... before i set out to meet weihan at E-Hub again... for the movie... hmm... finish the movie ard 10.40 like tt... den took bus home... kinda tired went i got back... after taking my bath... straight away knocked out on my bed... lolz... sweet dreams... Wahahahahaha.... 一觉到天亮!!! lolz... anw gtg catch my shows... take care guys! once again HAPPY NATIONAL DAY!!! god bless all... choaz... peace!
Quote Of The Day: Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away.
Feeling Of The Day: Great!!
Joke Of The Day: Designated Decoy
One night a police officer was staking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible DUI violations. At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb and try his keys on five different cars before he found his. The man sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes.
Meanwhile, all the other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started his engine and began to pull away. The police officer was waiting for him. As soon as he pulled onto the street, the officer stopped him, read him his rights and administered the breathalyzer test to determine his blood-alcohol content.
The results showed a reading of 0.0.
The puzzled officer demanded to know how that could be. The driver replied, “Tonight I’m the designated decoy.”
Signing off, Chris
9:05 PM
Sunday, August 03, 2008
Sunday afternoon again... the weather is SUPER DUPER HOT man!! can't stand the heat... bath with cold water also no use... haiz... tmr marks the start of the 11th week of FYPJ... which means it is the last two weeks!!! Yeah man!! can't wait for it to finish... job hunting for part time job... hope can find one soon... and hope it is a decent one... can earn alot de... stay at home the whole day ytd... lazy to go out... but later going out... see can get a PDA phone anot... had been wanting one for age... really hope can get one later... :D well... going out soon... choaz... take care guys! peace!
Quote Of The Day: All progress is based upon a universal innate desire on the part of every organism to live beyond its income.
Feeling Of The Day: HOT!!!
Joke Of The Day: Globalization Joke
Finally, here is a definition of globalization anyone can understand:
Question: What is the truest definition of Globalization?
Answer: Princess Diana's death.
Question: How come?
Answer:
An English princess riding with her Egyptian boyfriend
I like the above two banner alot... they are quite meaningful
Lunch Break area...
The project noticeboard...
The tape machine...
Guess where is the place with the arrow pointing... Yes... Singapore Changi Airport...
well... gonna start work frm tmr onwards... wun have the time to come online so often already... except on Saturday and Sunday bah... :) gonna miss my com i guess... haha... Well... there's a show i tink u guys shd watch... able to watch it online... it's call 篮球火 aka Hot Shot... it's a very nice show indeed... casting... Jerry Yan, Wu Zun, Luo Zhi Xiang... it's a very nice and comdey show... make u laugh non-stop... especially the basketball stuns in the show... it's damn damn nice... it will definatly catch most of ur attention... anw gonna go catch the third episode of it... take care guys... choaz... peace!
below is the lab tt i did my project deployment in... see... all the com with the screen on tgt... damn nice... lolz... anwgonna go makan dinner liao... take care guys... peace!
Quote Of The Day: Procrastination isn't the problem, it's the solution. So procrastinate now, don't put it off.
