Tuesday, June 18, 2013
what a bummer
official first day of being a bum :) gotta learn to live without income for a while. staying at home cuts the expenses drastically, but I should really think of some place to go since long holidays like this aren't easy to come by. and I certainly do not want them to come by too frequently either. wanted to start an exercise regime but the weather has been acting against me. extreme heat is bad enough, but haze as well? the world is against me getting back my fitness. haha.
waiting for that phone call from the recruiter. I think he's fed up with me as well.
Saturday, March 23, 2013
the letter
the second time i handed in the letter was like the first. a decision made in haste, yet a decision that was long in the coming. yet it was different as well. the first time it felt almost right. i was going ahead in my career, i had a pay bump, i was going somewhere everyone else wanted to go to. this time, i'm not so sure. and i was almost, almost talked into staying. it's true, i'll not be able to find another job which pays me $135k p.a., nor one which attaches such a brand name. i'm not even sure where i'll end up at now. just over 2 years into working life, and i'm already moving into my third job. for the first time in years i'm not sure how to tell my parents about something.
am i just lazy? there are those at wongp who have withstood much longer hours and have persevered on still. my hours have comparatively been better. yet being in a relatively better position isn't quite enough for me. i want a job that doesn't consume my life, that doesn't make me dread mondays, and that doesn't make me fear losing my weekends. i want a job that doesn't stress me to the point where i spend every waking moment worrying over work. yet i want a job with good prospects and salary. we don't always get what we want. there are attributes to success which i've come to realise and admit that i just don't have. that kind of doggedness and ambition.
yet in spite of all the worries there's relief. a relief that comes with the letter. a loss of expectation. a bright light at the end of the tunnel. is this bright light a false dawn? i will know in time to come.
Sunday, March 03, 2013
direction
after a 2 week break, it's back to work. as always, there will be too many deals, too many emails, too many things i don't know and do not have the motivation to find out. perhaps this is a sign that i should move on. if work is such a daily struggle, then life is as well, since work is synonymous with life at times. this job has this effect.
i'm not sure what i dislike most. the loss of freedom? being chained to my blackberry all the time is not the way i envision the next few years of my life. the inability to ask questions? having such a boss takes away the chance for learning. the lack of ppl that i can talk to at work? or just the fact that my job does not interest me anymore, and has no meaning to me other than the paycheck at the end of the month.
the break was too short. but which break isn't? i enjoyed myself though. travelling to a foreign land always has its excitement, and travelling to a rather foreign climate for the first time brought an even greater sense of adventure. i'm glad that you were there with me. without you, i would have felt lost, and would have most probably actually been lost. but you were there, and together we found all the places i had wanted to see, and did all the things i had set out to do. thank you.
i probably need someone to give me some direction in the way of my career as well. i dislike where i am, yet i know that if i persevere, i'd reap greater rewards. yet i feel tired, and want to call it quits already. ah, choices, choices and opportunities.
Saturday, September 08, 2012
it was good while it lasted
just over 3 months since i've joined a&o. probation over, for now, and i've had a great appraisal from my mentor, but things are just started. next week i go back to a familiar dept, in kinda familiar circumstances. banking, here i am again.
my time in cap mkts was great. my mentor was understanding and willing to teach, my hours were good, and i felt that my work was appreciated. it was a shame that it could not have lasted longer.
i'm not sure how a&o banking compares to wongp banking. in all likelihood it would be similar, which i'm not too sure is a good thing. having enjoyed my time at cap mkts, i'm not sure if i can go back and adjust my expectations again. sigh.
ah well. i guess knuckling down and working hard is necessary if i want my career to be heading anywhere. i don't have great ambitions or anything, but i do want to fulfil my potential somewhat. i may not going to be a superstar, but i want to be a competent lawyer at the least.
and i just realized, that other than blogging abt work, i don't really have anything else to blog abt. this is kind of sad, isn't it?
Sunday, June 24, 2012
i need to learn to be more open with the ppl arnd me. gahh.
Sunday, June 03, 2012
first post of 2012
can't believe that my first post of 2012 would be in june, but here it is. i was about to give up blogging altogether, just as i had nearly given up on facebook, but somehow there's still a desire to maintain a little of my presence on the www. haha.
i'm about to start working life with a new firm tmr. my working life has been rather eventful thus far, to say the least. even though i had been with wongp for almost a year and a half, i've never really felt settled in. an opportunity arose in a firm i wanted to be a part of, and i jumped at it, even though there were many people who warned me against it. but it was too irresistable for me, and i just had to give it a try, even if it were likely that i had made a bad choice.
i want to settle a bit now. hopefully i will manage to do so in my new firm; if not, perhaps i should think of alternative careers. haha. i know for certain that i would remain in law, but i'm not sure in what capacity.
it has been a gd break for me, if a little too much so. i must get back into the rhythm of working once again. jiayou!
Friday, September 23, 2011
it seems like an eternity since the last time i blogged. discipline is something which i do not have much of, and a lack of discipline is seeing the decline of this blog, as well as my fitness. haha. where do i begin? i finally became a lawyer. i had a month's break. i went for my first overseas trip alone (the hk exchange trip notwithstanding). and i applied for a transfer from m&a to banking&finance. during the break i set out to improve on my fitness by jogging daily. it didn't work out. not even close. with my new ippt window opening soon this is a source of concern. a greater source of concern however is my impending switch to a new dept. i'm currently in limbo, not knowing if the transfer will go through any time soon. being a lawyer has not been what i've expected it to be. funny how we spend our lives chasing our dreams, but when they become reality, they are not what we really want. in any case i felt that it was a good time to make a switch, and i made a small one. not a jump to litigation or to another firm. just trying out another area in corporate. i think i just had to make the switch to do justice to myself, although i don't know if this is such a wise move after all. oh well. weekend's here!
About Me
wants:
to be a lawyer
more sleep
Tuesday, June 18, 2013
what a bummer
official first day of being a bum :) gotta learn to live without income for a while. staying at home cuts the expenses drastically, but I should really think of some place to go since long holidays like this aren't easy to come by. and I certainly do not want them to come by too frequently either. wanted to start an exercise regime but the weather has been acting against me. extreme heat is bad enough, but haze as well? the world is against me getting back my fitness. haha.
waiting for that phone call from the recruiter. I think he's fed up with me as well.
Saturday, March 23, 2013
the letter
the second time i handed in the letter was like the first. a decision made in haste, yet a decision that was long in the coming. yet it was different as well. the first time it felt almost right. i was going ahead in my career, i had a pay bump, i was going somewhere everyone else wanted to go to. this time, i'm not so sure. and i was almost, almost talked into staying. it's true, i'll not be able to find another job which pays me $135k p.a., nor one which attaches such a brand name. i'm not even sure where i'll end up at now. just over 2 years into working life, and i'm already moving into my third job. for the first time in years i'm not sure how to tell my parents about something.
am i just lazy? there are those at wongp who have withstood much longer hours and have persevered on still. my hours have comparatively been better. yet being in a relatively better position isn't quite enough for me. i want a job that doesn't consume my life, that doesn't make me dread mondays, and that doesn't make me fear losing my weekends. i want a job that doesn't stress me to the point where i spend every waking moment worrying over work. yet i want a job with good prospects and salary. we don't always get what we want. there are attributes to success which i've come to realise and admit that i just don't have. that kind of doggedness and ambition.
yet in spite of all the worries there's relief. a relief that comes with the letter. a loss of expectation. a bright light at the end of the tunnel. is this bright light a false dawn? i will know in time to come.
Sunday, March 03, 2013
direction
after a 2 week break, it's back to work. as always, there will be too many deals, too many emails, too many things i don't know and do not have the motivation to find out. perhaps this is a sign that i should move on. if work is such a daily struggle, then life is as well, since work is synonymous with life at times. this job has this effect.
i'm not sure what i dislike most. the loss of freedom? being chained to my blackberry all the time is not the way i envision the next few years of my life. the inability to ask questions? having such a boss takes away the chance for learning. the lack of ppl that i can talk to at work? or just the fact that my job does not interest me anymore, and has no meaning to me other than the paycheck at the end of the month.
the break was too short. but which break isn't? i enjoyed myself though. travelling to a foreign land always has its excitement, and travelling to a rather foreign climate for the first time brought an even greater sense of adventure. i'm glad that you were there with me. without you, i would have felt lost, and would have most probably actually been lost. but you were there, and together we found all the places i had wanted to see, and did all the things i had set out to do. thank you.
i probably need someone to give me some direction in the way of my career as well. i dislike where i am, yet i know that if i persevere, i'd reap greater rewards. yet i feel tired, and want to call it quits already. ah, choices, choices and opportunities.
Saturday, September 08, 2012
it was good while it lasted
just over 3 months since i've joined a&o. probation over, for now, and i've had a great appraisal from my mentor, but things are just started. next week i go back to a familiar dept, in kinda familiar circumstances. banking, here i am again.
my time in cap mkts was great. my mentor was understanding and willing to teach, my hours were good, and i felt that my work was appreciated. it was a shame that it could not have lasted longer.
i'm not sure how a&o banking compares to wongp banking. in all likelihood it would be similar, which i'm not too sure is a good thing. having enjoyed my time at cap mkts, i'm not sure if i can go back and adjust my expectations again. sigh.
ah well. i guess knuckling down and working hard is necessary if i want my career to be heading anywhere. i don't have great ambitions or anything, but i do want to fulfil my potential somewhat. i may not going to be a superstar, but i want to be a competent lawyer at the least.
and i just realized, that other than blogging abt work, i don't really have anything else to blog abt. this is kind of sad, isn't it?
Sunday, June 24, 2012
i need to learn to be more open with the ppl arnd me. gahh.
Sunday, June 03, 2012
first post of 2012
can't believe that my first post of 2012 would be in june, but here it is. i was about to give up blogging altogether, just as i had nearly given up on facebook, but somehow there's still a desire to maintain a little of my presence on the www. haha.
i'm about to start working life with a new firm tmr. my working life has been rather eventful thus far, to say the least. even though i had been with wongp for almost a year and a half, i've never really felt settled in. an opportunity arose in a firm i wanted to be a part of, and i jumped at it, even though there were many people who warned me against it. but it was too irresistable for me, and i just had to give it a try, even if it were likely that i had made a bad choice.
i want to settle a bit now. hopefully i will manage to do so in my new firm; if not, perhaps i should think of alternative careers. haha. i know for certain that i would remain in law, but i'm not sure in what capacity.
it has been a gd break for me, if a little too much so. i must get back into the rhythm of working once again. jiayou!
Friday, September 23, 2011
it seems like an eternity since the last time i blogged. discipline is something which i do not have much of, and a lack of discipline is seeing the decline of this blog, as well as my fitness. haha. where do i begin? i finally became a lawyer. i had a month's break. i went for my first overseas trip alone (the hk exchange trip notwithstanding). and i applied for a transfer from m&a to banking&finance. during the break i set out to improve on my fitness by jogging daily. it didn't work out. not even close. with my new ippt window opening soon this is a source of concern. a greater source of concern however is my impending switch to a new dept. i'm currently in limbo, not knowing if the transfer will go through any time soon. being a lawyer has not been what i've expected it to be. funny how we spend our lives chasing our dreams, but when they become reality, they are not what we really want. in any case i felt that it was a good time to make a switch, and i made a small one. not a jump to litigation or to another firm. just trying out another area in corporate. i think i just had to make the switch to do justice to myself, although i don't know if this is such a wise move after all. oh well. weekend's here!
|