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david hoe.
NorthC.
catholic junior college.
(more to come. haha.)

incredulous

never did i thought all these were ever incredulous.
It's possible.

I just want to make my point clear as crystal.

Kingdom Citizen have Kingdom Rights as well as Kingdom Responsibilites.
When one sees any problems it's his/her responsibilites to do something and not mull over things.

That's my reason for what i'm about to do.

It's never about one's talent but about your HEART for the lord.

david

---

impeccable

when you know the decision that was made by now,
you might be thinking 'why', trying to survey my deeds to firgure out why.

i will simply state why i did things they way i choose too.
'Does he really like this decision?', this might be running through your mind.
No. Formality is what i would prefer.
Family is what i appreciated and always treasured.

I'm doing this because of his saving hands and love has always been with me.
It's also almost like done with the work here.
This one year, the family ties i have made.
The tears i have sherd was because of love.
Those trying moments was being transcend by love for man because i've been saturate by his love.
Responsible is what i've grown over this one year in this family and 2 years you have took care of me.

What i'm about to do must not cause you to be awestruck.
Because we live for him, don't we?
I hope that i have trained you guys up well.
Strong man of God.
This one year i've seen so many ups and downs but it's His love that kept me ongoing.

The reason i've made this decision is because of love and compassion for people once again.
Tough it might seem but i'm going with his love.
I treasure and love all of you.

You have made this one year worthwhile for me.
We might be naughty at times but i still believe in all of you.

I always trust and blieve in all of you and i want you to lead them as how jesus would do it.
Many times my leading it's not the best but i just know that it's him that i'm following.
Thus i have given him my life.

Take my life for i'm yours.

david

---

drank to drown his sorrow

i live to one decision.
call me dumb or stupid or whatsoever you like.

once the decision is made i will not turn back anymore.
this is just where i belong not for long.
i know that you have enabled me to so what you need to.
This family i will have a place in my heart.
Silent tears will break from my heart.
But i'm going to be strong with you.
I have live not to regret this decision that i will make.
This path i will choose i will not turn back.

you have played such a part in my life.
I love you.
i mean it from the depth of my heart.
You all have made me who i am today.
No matter what this family, i will always remember and love you.

But i'm going to step out now.
out to this land that i will never know what might crash on me.
But i have him.
Goodbye. i will still move on.

I will stand strong and not be pushed down by waves.
I love all of you.

STAND STRONG AND GROWING MY BROTHERS.
i LOVE ALL OF YOU.

i live not to regret this DECISION that i choose.
This path i might be alone but never lonely.

I have sink deep into thoughts about this day.
Time to go against myself.
I am not turning back anymore.

Even as the decion is made,
i urge this north conquerous group to live up to your calling.
Boys to Man.
Love God love people!
Catch my spirit man.
I never want to return again if things are still the same.
i love all of you.

David

clover

Time. Something can never be brought, sold or even borrowed.
This race is not one that he has given to me wrongly.
It does test me, mould me and shaped me.
Never did i once say it was a breeze.
Because i know he only promised me peace.
well. think about it.
He didn't promise me the world of friends.
But he did promise me his presence.
Well. think about it, david.
What's more worthwhile then his presence.
Sometimes we just simply wished that we will have never even known him, isn't it?
But think about, what life will be without him?
Fun. Yes.
but after a hardcore day of fun.
Honestly where can it boils to?

Friendships of the world and this kingdom are world apart.
Choose for yourselves.

Never be so blinded but what's temporal.

This was a rush post.
Just a thought when my fingers landed on this entry.
=)

Meanwhile, it's 3.03 in the morning.
DAVID HOE. WHAT ARE YOU DOING ONLINE!
eh. apparenly. Melvin is showering. so i'm waiting for him.
I'm at his hse.
It was a impromptu event.
but still God i thank you for such a honest friend like him.
When i count my blessings, i will never fail to thank you for this spiritual family though and also the friends that you have given. Help me to always remember ya goodness.
As tough as this race might get,
oceans may rise,
thunders will roar,
earth may shake,
storm may ruin,
and even if the world was to collapse.
Help me to remember your hands with me.
WILL I LIVE TO REGRET THIS DECISION?
answer: for me to know and for ya to find out.
He's out! i better stop now! whahahha.
still. Thank you jesus.
david hoe...

---

cataphora

how can his hands not emplace things in the right footing?
God, to me. You have never ever let me go.
I tried to run away at times but your hands seems to be like the blood that flows through my vessle.
You never seem to let me go.
All i did was to ask you and you answered through my friends, e mail followed by my quiet time.

I thank you jesus.
I have made up my mind once again that i will not do life alone.
You have encircled me with friends that have played a consequential role in my life.
I love the friends you have given me.

God i thank you for having a wonderful buddy, Jarvin.
Thanks for letting him to be part of my life.
I appreciate all those friends you gave me.
Same goes for melvin who comprehend certain things that not many could.
Thank you jesus.

The test gets tougher and tougher.
I'm ready.
Here i am, shoot whatever you got.

David

down the streets

it's been long since i last walked down the streets in town.
Gazing at the shining lights that evokes off from the LED.
Looking at the streets which were covered with cars.
Walking down the streets aimlessly but with many questions that bombarded my mind.
As much as i choose not to think about it,
i knew it will never stop flowing.
I knew i had to make a decision and things cannot carry on this way.
I tried many ways to forget about it but the 'washer devil' never seem to entertain me.
Reality slice through my flesh.
As deep as my thoughts could go, i let it sink.
'Did i do anything wrong?' my inner voice accent with a sense of husky sound.
It kept resounding within me.
Coming to this conclusion, i asked myself.
'why must it always be i'm at fault?'.
'Has it all got to do with me?'.
I thought about things.
I decided i'm not giving in this time round.
I checked if i'm prideful.
There was not angle of it.
All i wanted was to know why must i always be wrong?
Simple concern got misunderstood.
'Why?'
I'm not going to be the dog you called.

It occurs to me that if true friends even exist now. It's such a superfical word.
God you painted so many incidents today.
Harry, melvin and him.
What were ya implying to me?
i cannot decipher your acts.

It all happened close to one year.
Maybe i will swim in this ocean alone again with you.
I will encricled myself with you alone.
All those are just part of me now.
Maybe.

Father,
my question to you is still this.
Am i in wrong?
if i am, i've said sorry to ya and the party.
But why must it happens this way?
A slight concern got to be understood.
Your child,
david

*** btw. this is all just thoughts.
i hope it will never be real.
NEVER
ONLY THOUGHTS

---

hello again. as promised. I will blog for today.
It's not blank to me that blogging have not been part of me recently.
Then again, i cannot believe this. It's my 401 post.
I've been blogging since last year and time indeed flies. Just by a glance or so, a year have passed.
thus it becomes my 401 post.
why am i making such a long deal over it?
apparently, i do not know why.
But still. It gave me a shocked when i saw that it was a 401 post. Stop making a big deal over it, DAVID HOE!

well. i shall just move on to what i want to unleash out from my heart to this little rectangular box.
cradle to grave? sounds nice. that's out of the topic.
well. hmmm. time files. indeed. I just come to realize recently that i've been spiritual buddy with jarvin for a year already. Taking a quick flash back of this one year, i must say that i really have been strengthen a lot by his encouragement and being truthful with me. I surely appreciate this brother a lot! Just on monday, i was counting all those people i treasured a lot in my life during my retreat. i really appreciate all of them.
well. highlights of my past week:
1- had our sub district bro's night. it was surely interesting.
2- i ran 15 km today.
that's what my short term memory mind can recalled
i don;t wanna blog now!
com ultra lag.
full stop.
david

festonned

this is my no. 400 post. i was flabbergasted when i saw the number 400.
eh. i think i will blog more tonight.

---

coated

went to watch harry potter today with melvin.
relatively a gd effects show.
melvin is a gd friend frm what i think. =)
whee.
eh. i think i want to go and PRAY NOW!
AND I'M SO CONVICTED
GET OUT OF THAT PIONNERING STAGE!
DON'T CARE JUST WACK!

DAVID

---

euphemistic

there's an URGENCY in this HOUR.
we as children MUST obey.
GOD is MOVING.
can you HEAR the sound of REVIVAL?

A complete feeling of ambivalent surge me this morning as i woke up at half past nine. Caught in a dilemma,i still decided to fall back to sleep to compensate for my lost of sleep for the past few nights. At least i did not wake up in a fluster like all other past three days. Surely i enjoyed my three days experience with God. Being submerged in full turth teaching how can my cognitive self not be renewed. I surely learn a greater depth into healing. A healing church. In short FAITH is required. In God's general plan, he wants all to be in gd health however there are some when God does not healed it's for his glory. Another thing that caught me real deep was that do not steal God's glory.

There are so much i have been learnign over there. =) i enjoy it!

well. i need to bump off nw.

david

---

Pandemic

the intensity of the sun shone onto the asia skin of mine.
Drops of salt water dripped from my head.
It rolls down form my head to neck and downwards till it touches the shoe.
The climax i thought would end there but it did not.
Pushing myself a little further and further.
Every step i took it had a mixed of feelings hovering within me.
Two voices i heard.
I wanted to stand motionless at moments but i kept running in the route.
His encouragement added the fuel that i needed.
I kept running and running.
Never in my life i did about 13-14 km before. =)
It's beyond myself.

Through this whole run, i've learn one strong thing from God.
'It's ok to slow down but never right to stop!'
Just like in this race, it's ok to slow down and reflect but not stop and give up.
through this whole run, i see the value of encouragement even to a greater depth through melvin.
Thanks man!
Through this run, i have got to know myself better and melvin too.

God i'm always thankful for people you have never failed to place in my life. Everyone is here for a reason in my life. All of them become a pillar in my life. Even through all these, your faithfulness still remains. I met matthew up today for dinner. AGAIN. i could not finished my food. how sad. That's just so common. But still i treasure my friendship with him too. Jia you A level people! for your exams!

whahah. sunddenly thought of all my buddies. I;m just so glad to have them in my life! Jarvin, brandon and harry! They simply become a pillar in my life! Our relationship is beyond words. God being in the picture ease all things!

I love God!
one man can touch the world,
david

---

decision

The fickled mind of a man will never be able to comprehend by us.
We might live to say, 'A man will fully understand another man.'
But how many times can even the own man understand himself.
Even if he does, the complex mindset and heart of the man only can be understood by the creator of him.
Sometimes, man are just man.
That's so common sense.
How many times do we fail to understand that they are man?
Even if we forgotten about it, grace still comes from above and understand that as a sinful man you sinned.
Accept his forgivness.
will you not come before his courts and laid it all down? =)

A facade of things happened today.
Firstly, service was great. I learn much from the pastor. Though it was a relatively long sermon but still God spoke! =) FAITH! WHEE. Then afterwhich had lunch then we had our sower's meet. Though jia qi did not come today due to some stuffs and anty had to leave for China it left with all of us. Simply i believed that God spoke. One man can touch the world. You got to make a decision to step out of your comfort zone and abhor sin. I do not know about you but the sight of sin detest me tons. =) This is how true. well. then we had ULM today at Asia room. Had a long yet fruitful one! =) Great! whee. aftewhich we head to s11 to had dinner/supper. Because our stomach called out for our mouth to the gullet then back to him. =) So ate with the leaders and cls too. Teck yang and justin were there too. Then afterwhich went to meet my good friend, Melvin. But upon going there i saw yk, step and anglea. Caught a sight of jarvin but didn't say 'hi' to him as i rushed to meet melvin. whee. took the train to kovan with him. Because i met up with jemery to collect camp money from him. whee. i really am grateful to God for few things during my trip from nel to home:
1- Great shepherd God gave in my team. Jeremy even so late will come out to pass me camp money.
2- Great friend i have. Melvin. Being honest with me to share his thoughts on drawing the line of begin yourself. I learn from you too. =)
3- Great God i have who send me a cab because the train and bus was not alternatives at then
Simply everything was great. The meeting we had today. great! the buddies i have GREAT! i love all of them!
whee.
The diff between a leader and a loser is this:
Leaders make prayer FIRST but losers make prayer LAST.
think about it. do you pray?
whee.
i'm off to looking at what i learn for today.
david

---

the howling wind slice through my ribs.
but still i'm standing strong.

i'm flabbergasted at certain thoughts and things i would do at times.
the catch is that many time i do not know myself till i was told to look deeper.
the deeper i searched the more fear grow within me.
Th darker the tunnel and deeper it sinks my hands keep reaching out for you.
Never you failed.
You held me up so tightly thus i can Conquer the world. =)

whee. i had a day of great enjoyment and breakthough. =)
What i will always remember is today.
I had shepherding wiht si yuan at my house.
It's great. we spend around 4 hours being together and do life together.
My house simply great with him around too. =)

Then afterwhich, my foot led us to the train station and bump off we were in a train. Heading towards town to find ant and lk. =) sure it was always best to huddle together with them for a moment. I call them all my family and friends. The skies turned darker as time slides passed me. But still i caught hold of those moments that i need to be alone to plan and think through about my group and life. =) sure i had a unspeakable moment with him aagin at starbucks. with my usual mint tea. whee.

well. i shall go and do soem com stuffs nw.
till then

david

time to blog.
what a day i had today. with so many unexpected things that happened within moments. =)
firstly we had potential shepherds meet today. =) unexpected 15 people came. =) but still everyone had fun and learn the word of God. The good thing is that i see many world changers in this group. I see students with desire for God to saturate their life and school. You guys can surely make an impact that no one else on this earth can duplicate likewise because YOU are unique. =) this team of people are really fun to be with too. Surely it's a time of refreshing in terms of family renewal. =)
after which i had shepherding with teck yang. I must said that i really enjoyed shepherding today. =) We wanted to go to coffee bean for our tralk however God foreknows that it's not going to be a gd place thus we were directed to MARCHE. whee. i cannot believe it. i'm had shepherding there today. It's so. cool. but still we enjoyed the mouth watering food. It was simply sweet and hot. =) nice choice of pizza, sheep! hehe. spend most of the time discussing about issues. But still the point was hitted home. (",) Friends i call you.
The afterwhich i met up with jarvin. Got my bottom to root firmly to sofa seat at x box and had my fingers touching those black looking stuffs. I played precisely. I tried HALO. eh. kinda fun though. The played burnout 3 with jarving. I'm super bad at it but i still love playing it for the trill factor. He kept winning me over those rounds we played. went to kfc to had our dinner. again. i couldn't finsh my food. He sure knows me well. had a chat too. He helped me realize certain things. Jarvin if you are ever reading this, THANKS for being a honest friend to me. I really enjoy the fact that ya are always very frank with me when ya see things are not right. =) thanks for the reminder and trigger me to sink deeper into thoughts. YOU ARE APPRECIATED! i'm grateful to God for having ya in my life. =) kidding with ya abt the 1yr thing. you will know what i'm saying. BUt most importantly i appreciated ya buddy! =) seashell in my heart. =)
then i 'buff' to kovan at 8 odd. Met brandon to figure math with him. God i pray you help him in his math paper tomorrow. =)
i'm looking forward for few more hours later. well. i have to pull my feet to school
BUT
I'M LOOKING forward for shepherding with SI YUAN at MY HSE! whee. that's so damn cool.
seriously God, i really thank you for those sheep, friends and buddies. They make up one strong pillar in my life.
You are my strong tower!
flying off.
david

---

fishes

fishes. how nice. Don't they just captivate you for a spilt second in the moment. when you simply gazed at the magnificent fins of theirs it just bring great awe to us. Total awestruck.

well. apparently i was being SHEPHERDED! and i'm damn glad since i have not been having that often.

questions are not meant to be always answered. This was what i learn too.

i'm going to bring back a family group in my seed level and above meeting which i can touch down personally.

meanwhile i better buzz off to re look through my seed meeting and shepherding plans tomorrow.

=) here i come!

Please grant me wisdom.

---

how nice. just let the picture take you to a ocean of thoughts. Let you pluse stop pacing up with the city streets. and just go slow and take the time to rest in him. =) he rocks!

I gazed upon thisblue sky and sea but what seems to stand out is that pen like looking building. It just give me those moments to just be still and look at the art piece of God. =) ha. i need him to paint my life with his love as well. daily.

waves

The simplicity of this picture shows a specturm of my personal feelings at time.

I will never have enough to fathom those really nice waves that might crash over me.

Somethings i will feel helpless when all those waves come crashing over me. But all i ask is that God make me anchor firmly to the ground.

Waves are coming. Give up sign up is infront. But i will want to root firmly to his word. Though at times i might not make it.

But i do no care!

 

 

---

dumbfounded

i feel so ACCOMPLISHED!
whee. today i manage to do the unthinkable of me.
i went to run 4.8km then i went to the gym after which i went for 10 laps in the swimming pool.
manage to find a day where i can recuperate myself.

finally the pluse is beating faster again. =) that's gd!
haha.

well. i'm apparently gald about my paper. out of all the questions there was only one i think i could not do. but still i'm gald. =) physics prct always rocks for some reasons. =) shall not blog that much.

questions for you to think:
1- why in every healing that jesus performed he did it diffrently? What was he trying to tell us?
2- what the line between working with a heart that hides his word and just a worker?

david

---

cascaded

yawns. it's way before the sun rises and i'm blogging nw. apparently it's not because i not woke up early but i have yet to sleep. it's five mintues past three in the morning. I know he will still rise the sun for me. I cannot face reality that i'm to wake up hideously early tomorrow. like 8am? please.
but still. just want to blog a little about my day. =)
The rain may splatter onto my skin as i past through certain areas today but i do sure know you are always there. Nevertheless you spoke. That's all that comforts me. My yearning for more of you never come to an end. I will never want it too. =) I want to be with you. Had a great meeting with my guys today. apparently i really love this family and team of potential shepherds. Eager to desire for God's word. =) Presence.
also. thanks melvin for the rubric cube. =)
i'm so gald to anncounce that i've completed 42 questions of a math trigo. Each questions have many parts. And it was like so tedious for some and while some i brezze it. =) whee. today i think i did like? eh. 42 -12? 30 questions. Not me but HIM. But STILL I CANNOT imagine the fact i have like 13 more chapts to complete? chem? english? Banging my head against the wall. ahhh. but i'm kidding. so much work load
well. i better get some rest nw.
love the love you gave. =)
david

---

embraced

it came across my mind, 'How many times have i broken your heart?'
Frozen and still thinking, 'I'm not sure. but i do know. it's uncountable.'
'How on earth did i ever deserve this grace?' i pounder.
Simply it was the word GRACE.
Flabbergasted.
A paradox gift that had a paramount flare.

surprises were exuded today to me. I feel appreciated once again in this serving the Lord.
Yi feng, if you are reading this, i just want to say thanks for the sweet you came to find me to give it to me. It was surely a surprise. Nevertheless, it's a blessing in disgust. Thanks. It has really been long since i felt this way. Thanks people! Thank God for bryan. You are a simple heart guy but sure make an impact to many. =) Your heart of blessing others i can see. Indeed you apply what you learn. I feel so encouraged talking to you. =) I doubt melvin will read this too. but still i just wanna thank God for you being in my life. Thanks for those songs and also standing my crap. Brandon. Thanks for spending time with me even when i feel at the lowest pit of my life. Those train rides does have a meaning i behold. Si yuan, thanks for acitvely seeking to grow. You really ease my load a lot. Looking at your life, it encourages me! =) Teck yang, hard egg but sure know what God has for you. You have grown lots but i'm confident God's not done with you yet. He has such a great plan for you. Not done! I'm certain! Justin! Food. Thanks for being open and it helps me to help you to grow even more! I just really enjoy those people being in my life. Sure, there are more people that i really loved to be with and i do not have that ample time to pen it down!

world changer!
1- hunger for God's word.
the key to last to the end of race you must have a strong foundation in the word of God
there are more.

david

---

subtle

the city lights shone forth on the hectic streets as i gaze out of the panle of two inches thick piece of glass.
the intensity of the heat of the tropical sun never seem to tone down but blazes through the street such that the relfection occurs when it heats the car.
i sat down quietly and i looked out and being to pounder about what has happened to me recently.
i enjoy the times i can just be let alone and think about how am i as a being in the sight of God.
The melody of voices sunk into the blood of mine as i glanced through life once again and grateful am i not for his love and grace that never stops.
This is what i called taking time out from this hectic world that demands your hell load of life from you. It so suck you away. Taking that time away i choose to embed myself firmly to the chair and my pen and paper will attend to me. i need not to rush through this life. I love it. Doing life with you.
I just love to be anchor freely into his presence.
That was my retreat for the day. =) thought through many things that has happened in my walk with the lord and the unit as well. really desire to see an ultimate growth in my personal walk with him.

i shall blog for that till today.
i love my spiritual family of God.

david

---

TALK TO ME.

My FRIENDS. (will be here asap.)

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