Poooooooooooot!

I am up real late cuz well, i dunno.

Ruth woke a little just now and i cuddled her back to bed. It's nice when she's feeling lovey and wants to cuddle up. Usually she'll just shrug u away cuz she wants her space (but not left alone, have to stay beside her).

Anyway i had just adjusted into a nice cuddly position. She was opening and closing her eyes, trying to get back to sleep. Then i felt (my arm was near her butt) and heard a very long (about 2-3 second) pooooooooooooooooooooooooooot! I giggled at her, and she grinned ever so widely and sniggered abit.

So funny. heh.

Decision?

As i've previously stated, have desperately been trying to segregate my personal blog from Ruth's developmental stages here.

In the past few months to a year (???), i think i've given up (with flailing hands and all) and struggled to even give an update. Also, as Karen had neatly pointed out, the involvement, influence and "amalgamation" of Ruth in my life is unmistakably overwhelming.

Oh you know all the cliches.....BEFORE you have a kid, that you'll maintain your own interests/hobbies/me-time/LIFE! etc. But wait till you have one and all that goes down the drain (at least for me). I dun think my life isn't important, but it's just that I've made the (unconscious?) choice to dive headlong into being with Ruth and all.

I think the crazy workload - and my crazy commitment - also 'stopped' me from executing all the fancy things I want in life, including NOT looking like I'm still pregnant. (double sighs)

So i think from now on, i will try once again to segregate the blogs. I'm just wondering if i should re-post the ruth-related posts here and backdate it - just so it's all more erm, chronologically coherent. :P

HOLD TIGHT!

Yesterday at Vivocity, my mum decided that she'd piggy-back Ruth. So I told Ruth "HOLD TIGHT!!"

She mimicked, "oh-tat"

Made my day. :)

Livejournal>

Intent

The original intent was for my personal blog at Livejournal to be continued as my own, while maintaining this blogger site for the family posts.

but keeping this up alone is seemingly quite an uphill task, and I've given in to just updating livejournal since well, family is my life now mostly. Which mother (full time working or stay-at-home) is able to clearly delineate her roles in life vs that of a mother? All our waking moments, are spent in one way or another with relation to the family.

I'm still wondering how to proceed with the blogs. Hmm....

Intently waiting for the (right) bus

Intently waiting for the (right) bus, originally uploaded by LezY.

Yes, Ruth can be very intense. She isn't a 100% super spirited child, but she exhibits quite a lot of qualities of one. i believe she's a very focused, determined and intent girl. Sometimes she only wants her way and she's still pretty young to be reasoned with actually. We try our best to be patient with her, to understand why she cries or goes into her arm-flailing, inconsolable rages but it seems there's nothing you can really do but to let them ride out their emotions. These emotions frustrate them so because it's not within their capability to deal with such intense and rich feelings yet, despite feeling them so strongly.

The audio books I've been listening to really help me to understand my baby better and hopefully, will improve my ability to deal with her and nurture her.

pancakes

pancakes, originally uploaded by LezY.

Ruth has pancakes for breakfast (and snacks if there's "extra"/"leftovers") on weekends.

I've been experimenting on the texture of the batter. Regretably, it's still 'instant' pancakes for now since we had bought a box of batter in a hurry.

I've experimented with water, more water, less water. (The instructions specify "just add water" though.) I've also tried with milk as well cuz i remember from a long time ago, I've made pancakes from scratch and they tasted jolly good. Either I was GOOD or I was easy-going. hah.

So far, the fluffiest has to be a thicker batter with just water, over medium heat.

Yes. At least she eats this.

Walking and Smiling

I was deleting SMSes in my phone and found this one from Daniel that reminded me.

Ruth started walking on her own more confidently at about 14 months. Prior to that, she was kinda lunging all over the place in spurts of energy. It was an incident at the playground that spurred her to walk. She was enchanted by a ball rolling on the floor - subsequently picked up by an older girl. So she followed that girl (holding the ball) for some time on her own - before realizing she was walking and i think promptly plomping her ass back down on the floor. Hilarious.

Recent 1-2 weeks, Ruth has been smiling very very broadly, and at about EVERYTHING. Thank you is a smile. Please is a smile. Yes is a smile. OK is a smile.

And it's one of those smile-till-u-can't-see-my-eyes kinda grin that she gives. WHen you ask her for a sweet sweet smile, she will cringe up one side of the face - looks more like monkey face than smiling.

She's also now able to understand what we say - though she's not very vocal and doesn't speak much. She'll point and give a holler if she wants something. WHen she wants to eat something, she'll point and go "AHM!".

I think communication-wise, we're getting there. THere are period of tension whereby she'll deliberately not listen and you can somehow see some sorta thought process going through her head - perhaps considering if she WANTS to comply.

ALso, she's takes the soft approach better. If you praise her and ask her to do something, there's a higher chance of that particular thing getting done. I think my girl is really quite a fun-loving soul. Give her a playground and she'll be so happy she'll forget everything.

TOmorrow, we'll bring her for her MMR - her 17th birthday. Really hope all will go well. I hate bringing her for jabs. My heart aches as much as it hurts her.

When Ruth gets difficult...

she can be extremely hard to appease.

In the last weekend, she displayed such a wide range of behaviours it was bizarre. But it must have been even weirder and stranger to her, than it should have been for us. It's possibly very new and scary when you have abilities but no control over them. How you can suddenly feel happy and sad, overwhelmed, loss of appetite, pain, frustration, tired, anguished, etc and not know what all these are, or how to deal with them - and if you need/should deal with them.

Repeatedly, i find myself rebuking myself for trying to find a reason for her behaviour...cuz somewhere in me, i find that there shouldn't have to be a reason for everything. Hell, sometimes i'm pure frustrated but just can't figure out why too.

So here's my little active girl, who needs to be continually engaged and perhaps just needs a break from it all. Perhaps she can't quite figure out all these emotions, decisions, etc that are bombarding her...thus refusing to be carried, refussing to walk and just plomping her butt down on the floor - no matter where she is - refusing to budge.

My girl.

But her newfound smile is awfully heart-warming and would melt away any frustration we feel. Ask for her sweet sweet smile/pretty smile and she'll flash you one so wide, with the smallest eyes possible. :P

Self-regulation

Today I learn about self-regulation. And I also observe that Ruth is learning bit by bit how to 'get along' with us. The dynamics between parents and grandparents and how this 2 sets of 'guardians' impact her life.

Watching Ruth is an amazing part of my life. I feel blessed when I look at her - even when I'm not one to go goo-goo ga-ga over children. Watching my own child grow is an immensely humbling experience - and one that makes me appreciate many things that I've taken for granted.

Ruth now will seek affirmation and i've read elsewhere before that it is important we give her the affirmation as it would help in her self-confidence. Spirited children like her need more verbal/physical assurance than quiet children apparently.

It is also really fun because when she does something "good" (in our eyes!), we will praise her and she will do it over and over again. This kinda tells her that it's a "do" and doing "dos" can be fun too.

She is WILDLY happy when we praise her in response to her requests for us to clap our hands. it's almost funny!

A small para from the article.

There is no magic moment when children become more likely to follow directions. But from around 12 months, something very important happens: they begin to develop the ability to control their urges, change their behaviour, and may start to do what mum or dad says. Not all of the time, of course. But as children grow, so does their ability to stop themselves from doing something they want to do (like writing on the walls) and perform tasks that they don't like (picking up their toys), even when parents or caregivers aren't around.

The name for this wonderful part of development is ‘self-regulation’ and it is one of the most important milestones of life. Without it, we would have a very hard time functioning, learning lessons in school, playing with friends, or getting along with people in general.

Even though just about every child develops some level of self-regulation, each person is different. Some kids will naturally develop this ability earlier than others. Just as some children show more shyness, some children show more ‘effortful control’ which is a personality trait that leads to self-regulation.

So instead of removing this blog....

I've decided (for now!) to convert it into things I've learnt about Ruth and toddler/child behaviour.