Past few weeks has been really rocky. Can't really pin point any particular cause, but it just didn't feel right. Nitty gritty details became the focus of our conversations and nit-picking became a habit. The hardest part was there seems to be no solution to an evident problem. A problem that, left unsolved, would bite at us constantly. Unless we can learn to live with it, which we haven't, we'll just have to constantly pressure ourselves over the instability it's causing.
Am I thinking too much? I was told so, still the problem stands. I always thought time was a helping hand, now it's just a crowbar, wrenching on the cracks in between. Why wouldn't time help us?
Sunday, 2 November 2008
Sunday, 19 October 2008
Combat Ready
Forewarn anyone that tries to get funny with missy here. I've been so hooked on a gym class that I'm practising my moves even on my poor darling... *OoPs* The class is Body Combat and it uses martial arts moves with music. Shiok! I've only gone for 2 classes but it's adrenaline pumping! LOL! Reminds me of the time when I went for weekly kickbox plus dance trainings, tiring but so fulfilling! I declare myself officially hooked!
But the truth is when you have paid for the membership, it's like a crime to miss exercise. Being a money-sensitive and motivated lady, without paying the price I don't see myself moving my ever growing butt and flabbing my butterfly sleeves. At least next time when I'm ask how often I exercise during health checks I can proudly say at least 3 times a week! What self praise, I can't stand myself.
But the truth is when you have paid for the membership, it's like a crime to miss exercise. Being a money-sensitive and motivated lady, without paying the price I don't see myself moving my ever growing butt and flabbing my butterfly sleeves. At least next time when I'm ask how often I exercise during health checks I can proudly say at least 3 times a week! What self praise, I can't stand myself.
Tuesday, 7 October 2008
Work it off!!
Lot of things to be happy about this week. First of all, no need to go to work 'cause I'm on course. WaHhaaHaHA!! Everyday go course slack, listen to lecture and stone. But still one of the speakers got on my nerves by his sheer lack of professionalism and atrocious attitude. Let me explain my outrage. The topic was on learning more about my organization (mind the careful omission of any names, it is purely intentional) and the speaker came up and the first thing he said was "I don't know why I'm doing here. I've already tendered my resignation and this is my last month. I was arrowed to do it." Then he goes on to saying the slides were boring, calling our Chairman "the bald guy" and constantly uttering "shit". Totally unprofessional. No doubt he's leaving the place, but it's still his job anyway, shouldn't he still be carrying out more acceptably? I'm not even asking for an excellent or even satisfactory presentation, just bare minimum. To the guy, you top the list now for the most utter lack of professionalism, EQ and character. *sPiTs*
Back to the happy stuff, so because of the course I get to wake up almost 1 hour later than usual. Hoo-ray!! Sleep is like the most wonderful thing on weekdays. So all the energy led to me starting my exercise plan. I signed up for a fitness club and I started going yesterday. As everyone would agree I think, the hardest part is starting, so everything's good! I wouldn't be wasting my hard-earned money as I'll be making full use of the facilities and classes. So anyone interested please come join me k? Gets boring when you haveto work out alone. WahaHaha!! Determined to work off that growing thunder thighs and ever-expanding butterfly sleeve. LOL!
Back to the happy stuff, so because of the course I get to wake up almost 1 hour later than usual. Hoo-ray!! Sleep is like the most wonderful thing on weekdays. So all the energy led to me starting my exercise plan. I signed up for a fitness club and I started going yesterday. As everyone would agree I think, the hardest part is starting, so everything's good! I wouldn't be wasting my hard-earned money as I'll be making full use of the facilities and classes. So anyone interested please come join me k? Gets boring when you haveto work out alone. WahaHaha!! Determined to work off that growing thunder thighs and ever-expanding butterfly sleeve. LOL!
Wednesday, 17 September 2008
Reality
Work late today, but not because I needed to, but because I didn't wanna be protrayed as a slack worker.
Anyway the story began when a colleague who was rather free asked to join for tea break. My workload was manageable, so I thought why not. Took a walk to the pantry with another friend to join her. Sat down and saw the papers on the table, so we took it up and read. Apparently our presence and actions drawn displeased response, so when I left the pantry for a moment to my desk, a colleague stopped me and conveyed the response. So after relaying the message to the other 2, we left the pantry after a short 5 minutes' break.
Firstly, I admit we were probably wrong to openly have our break and read the newspaper in the pantry. Ignorance.
Secondly, our volume could have been a factor as my colleague did have a loud voice.
Thirdly, it may have been 'cause of the meeting that was just taking place in the room beside the pantry. Not sure who were in there, might have been someone high ranking.
Conclusion, don't be open about your workload, meaning don't show that you are unoccupied. Even if it is because you are a fast worker. I guess it just pisses some people off that they can't finish their work.
Act busy at all possible times. Stay at your desk and stare at your inbox, respond in the shortest possible time. Even if it doesn't promote much efficiency. Anyway you never know who's a backstabber to notice the slightest instance that you are not at work and wrings you by the neck with it.
That's reality and I learnt it the hard way.
Anyway the story began when a colleague who was rather free asked to join for tea break. My workload was manageable, so I thought why not. Took a walk to the pantry with another friend to join her. Sat down and saw the papers on the table, so we took it up and read. Apparently our presence and actions drawn displeased response, so when I left the pantry for a moment to my desk, a colleague stopped me and conveyed the response. So after relaying the message to the other 2, we left the pantry after a short 5 minutes' break.
Firstly, I admit we were probably wrong to openly have our break and read the newspaper in the pantry. Ignorance.
Secondly, our volume could have been a factor as my colleague did have a loud voice.
Thirdly, it may have been 'cause of the meeting that was just taking place in the room beside the pantry. Not sure who were in there, might have been someone high ranking.
Conclusion, don't be open about your workload, meaning don't show that you are unoccupied. Even if it is because you are a fast worker. I guess it just pisses some people off that they can't finish their work.
Act busy at all possible times. Stay at your desk and stare at your inbox, respond in the shortest possible time. Even if it doesn't promote much efficiency. Anyway you never know who's a backstabber to notice the slightest instance that you are not at work and wrings you by the neck with it.
That's reality and I learnt it the hard way.
Monday, 15 September 2008
Work, work, work
Today was the first time I stayed late for work. In fact I could have stayed later but it wasn't really necessary. Anyway it's a good sign, as I seem to be better utilizing my time at work. At least I feel my momentum returning after a major lull from being to used to the GC pace of life.
Feel more inspired to get back to dance classes, learn squash, go blading or basically go sun-tanning. I've been growing a little tummy since I return home a month ago, and I'm ready to get rid of it!! Saturday morning jogs, maybe a game of squash in the afternoon which I've been contemplating for ages.
Also I should get down to changing my blog skin to something more direct. Something people can straight away read without having to click an extra "Posts" button. I'll get to that.. Soon...
Feel more inspired to get back to dance classes, learn squash, go blading or basically go sun-tanning. I've been growing a little tummy since I return home a month ago, and I'm ready to get rid of it!! Saturday morning jogs, maybe a game of squash in the afternoon which I've been contemplating for ages.
Also I should get down to changing my blog skin to something more direct. Something people can straight away read without having to click an extra "Posts" button. I'll get to that.. Soon...
Tuesday, 2 September 2008
Happy-ness
This couple of weeks have been full of good news. Other than myself starting on a job, it's about my friends.
Top on the list is from my dearest jie-mei YY who getting married. Although it's just ROM but it's greaaat news already! The rest of us have been waiting for so long for the 2 of them to finally tie it amidst all the drama in between. Another news was from yesterday, when another friend slipped her tongue and informed me m other jie-mei got hitched. Shocked. Surprised. but in the end still happy. Another finally.
Knowing each other so long, I really feel happy for my jie-meis. Whether we meet each other often, or that I'm not the first person they look for when they've got good news, bad news, doesn't bother me. At least I know they are on the top of the list when it comes to my wedding invitation list. (Disclaimer: it's just a way of expressing their importance to me, not indicative of any plans soon.)
Met up with my councillors, also glad that I'm still included in the loop, despite several last minute absence from previous meetings. Most of the girls are working and the rest are all halfway through with studies.
Due to the close proximity of my workplace and my sis's, I've also gotten the chance to have a closer relation with my sis. Sleeping over at her place, going places together after work. Indeed I feel closer to my sis in this past 2 weeks, compared to complaining and arguing with her before.
So generally it's been a positive month for August 2008, if not considering my thoughts on the current standing of progression in my career path. Not gonna mention about work today. I'll pass judgement later, when I have really gotten my own work. Just to be fair. :P
Top on the list is from my dearest jie-mei YY who getting married. Although it's just ROM but it's greaaat news already! The rest of us have been waiting for so long for the 2 of them to finally tie it amidst all the drama in between. Another news was from yesterday, when another friend slipped her tongue and informed me m other jie-mei got hitched. Shocked. Surprised. but in the end still happy. Another finally.
Knowing each other so long, I really feel happy for my jie-meis. Whether we meet each other often, or that I'm not the first person they look for when they've got good news, bad news, doesn't bother me. At least I know they are on the top of the list when it comes to my wedding invitation list. (Disclaimer: it's just a way of expressing their importance to me, not indicative of any plans soon.)
Met up with my councillors, also glad that I'm still included in the loop, despite several last minute absence from previous meetings. Most of the girls are working and the rest are all halfway through with studies.
Due to the close proximity of my workplace and my sis's, I've also gotten the chance to have a closer relation with my sis. Sleeping over at her place, going places together after work. Indeed I feel closer to my sis in this past 2 weeks, compared to complaining and arguing with her before.
So generally it's been a positive month for August 2008, if not considering my thoughts on the current standing of progression in my career path. Not gonna mention about work today. I'll pass judgement later, when I have really gotten my own work. Just to be fair. :P
Monday, 18 August 2008
First Day of "Work"
Got through my first day at DSTA. Will avoid using the name in future, just in case I want to complain about work. LOL.
First thing in the morning, I was mistaken to be a guy. Not physically but because of my name. Initially I thought LT sounded perfectly female, but after some thought maybe it can be unisex, but to be totally male sounding is unacceptable. A bit over-reacting but probably it was the build-up to it. I was waiting in the lobby for the corporate staff to receive me, but many came and left but none for me. So I started worrying and the anxiety builded up. Well small matter actually.
Then I got shown around the place and brought to my department. The second thing then happened. My department is in the back wing of the building, but my desk is not. I'm across the hallway, past the toilets from the rest of my section, in the territory of another department. Like a sore thumb sticking out. My workstation is also empty. No chair (that was quickly solved so can't complain about that anymore). No cupboard so I had to long-bang my laptop in a colleague's cupboard. Just a phone extension and some stationeries. Don't really feel like personalising it 'cause I don't even wanna stay in that station for too long. Please let me have a workstation with my section, I'll even make do with one beside the manager. I'm desperate, especially when I found out that seat is near the Assistant Directors' offices. Well at least I've got a laptop to play with.
Lunch was a relief, thanks to Zinc. Went out for lunch, the fish soup was pretty good, as recommended. Got into their clique and they are a interesting bunch, with appointments and organisation structure. Wonder what appointment I'll be getting. *raises eyebrow*
In the afternoon, I was doing work but not official work. I was helping to prepare for a performance on Wed for the section. Drawing and cutting out 5 stars and a crescent for props.
So yup, that was how I spent my first day at work. Pretty productive eh?
First thing in the morning, I was mistaken to be a guy. Not physically but because of my name. Initially I thought LT sounded perfectly female, but after some thought maybe it can be unisex, but to be totally male sounding is unacceptable. A bit over-reacting but probably it was the build-up to it. I was waiting in the lobby for the corporate staff to receive me, but many came and left but none for me. So I started worrying and the anxiety builded up. Well small matter actually.
Then I got shown around the place and brought to my department. The second thing then happened. My department is in the back wing of the building, but my desk is not. I'm across the hallway, past the toilets from the rest of my section, in the territory of another department. Like a sore thumb sticking out. My workstation is also empty. No chair (that was quickly solved so can't complain about that anymore). No cupboard so I had to long-bang my laptop in a colleague's cupboard. Just a phone extension and some stationeries. Don't really feel like personalising it 'cause I don't even wanna stay in that station for too long. Please let me have a workstation with my section, I'll even make do with one beside the manager. I'm desperate, especially when I found out that seat is near the Assistant Directors' offices. Well at least I've got a laptop to play with.
Lunch was a relief, thanks to Zinc. Went out for lunch, the fish soup was pretty good, as recommended. Got into their clique and they are a interesting bunch, with appointments and organisation structure. Wonder what appointment I'll be getting. *raises eyebrow*
In the afternoon, I was doing work but not official work. I was helping to prepare for a performance on Wed for the section. Drawing and cutting out 5 stars and a crescent for props.
So yup, that was how I spent my first day at work. Pretty productive eh?
Saturday, 16 August 2008
Finally contributing to society
Gonna be starting work next monday. Wish me luck! Not exactly the job I wished, but then again I didn't want to sit around and wait for the chance to fall from the sky. So AT LEAST I'm no longer the only dependant in the family :P
Hopefully my dwindling account holds out for the next few weeks before my first pay...
Hopefully my dwindling account holds out for the next few weeks before my first pay...
Saturday, 2 August 2008
Returning to Life
Finally back in Singapore (with good stable internet connection), so probably ought to update my dear friends. It'll be difficult uploading all the photos here so please refer to my facebook account for them:
http://www.facebook.com/photos.php?id=785625157
I'm still uploading them as I type this entry so please be patient. Hehehe.
Some feelings from the trip. I did enjoy myself there and I really appreciate the very friendly culture in general. Something I wished happened in Singapore. Smiles and hellos, plenty to spare. But working there makes me realise how "Singaporean" we are. We simply cannot tolerate inefficiency. As described by my darling, it's a really huge feat to try to do a task that can be finished in 1 or 2 hours in more than 5 hours. Luckily it's not everyone that does that (but enough to irritate :P), and there are quite a number of Singaporeans and Thais who work similarly to us.
Apart from work, we made really great friends, especially with the Thais. Some of whom I'm sure are life-long relationships. Next time when we visit Phuket and Bangkok, we're gonna have personal guides. Haha! So if you ask what is my biggest take-home from working at Grand Canyon, I'll have to say it's the friends from Thailand. :)
As for the travelling part, I can only say it was great. I have never done more shopping in my life than the time I was there, all thanks to the cheap prices. But one thing I was stunned by was that prices stated are always excluding taxes so we end up paying more than we expected. Tipping was also another thing we had to get used to. Something I earn my extra pay from too working at a dining room. But since it isn't a fixed fee like in Singapore, we can pay according how well we were served which was more reasonable for us. When service was good tips can be up to 20%, but sometimes you don't even feel like leaving the small change behind. However generally service was good for most of the places we ate at, which is also one reason we enjoyed the trip.
Anyone that ask me if they should go for Work & Travel, I'll definitely say a yes. But it requires planning if you want a fruitful trip, so that days off are well-spent. Initially we ignored the fact that we had only 2 months and we had to make very rush arrangements for travelling in between which caused huge friction. If you are looking at earning back the programme fees and air tickets, you'll probably need at least 3 months and still it will depend on your job and pay. All in all it was a great trip which I didn't regret going for, but I certainly missed home so I delighted that I'M HOME!!
http://www.facebook.com/photos.php?id=785625157
I'm still uploading them as I type this entry so please be patient. Hehehe.
Some feelings from the trip. I did enjoy myself there and I really appreciate the very friendly culture in general. Something I wished happened in Singapore. Smiles and hellos, plenty to spare. But working there makes me realise how "Singaporean" we are. We simply cannot tolerate inefficiency. As described by my darling, it's a really huge feat to try to do a task that can be finished in 1 or 2 hours in more than 5 hours. Luckily it's not everyone that does that (but enough to irritate :P), and there are quite a number of Singaporeans and Thais who work similarly to us.
Apart from work, we made really great friends, especially with the Thais. Some of whom I'm sure are life-long relationships. Next time when we visit Phuket and Bangkok, we're gonna have personal guides. Haha! So if you ask what is my biggest take-home from working at Grand Canyon, I'll have to say it's the friends from Thailand. :)
As for the travelling part, I can only say it was great. I have never done more shopping in my life than the time I was there, all thanks to the cheap prices. But one thing I was stunned by was that prices stated are always excluding taxes so we end up paying more than we expected. Tipping was also another thing we had to get used to. Something I earn my extra pay from too working at a dining room. But since it isn't a fixed fee like in Singapore, we can pay according how well we were served which was more reasonable for us. When service was good tips can be up to 20%, but sometimes you don't even feel like leaving the small change behind. However generally service was good for most of the places we ate at, which is also one reason we enjoyed the trip.
Anyone that ask me if they should go for Work & Travel, I'll definitely say a yes. But it requires planning if you want a fruitful trip, so that days off are well-spent. Initially we ignored the fact that we had only 2 months and we had to make very rush arrangements for travelling in between which caused huge friction. If you are looking at earning back the programme fees and air tickets, you'll probably need at least 3 months and still it will depend on your job and pay. All in all it was a great trip which I didn't regret going for, but I certainly missed home so I delighted that I'M HOME!!
Thursday, 12 June 2008
Clearing tables with a Degree
My first job after getting my degree is to clear tables at a posh dining room. LOL. I requested for a transfer because of the $$. The tipping culture is very strong here and to earn from the service line you gotta earn it through tips. Yup, there's seldom any tipping at the cafeteria, so I'm going to a dining room called El Tovar. Hopefully get more money to shop!! Hehehe...
Moved to a cabin room few days ago, which has our own toilet. And finally we are much nearer to the guys which are just a few room down. Our ceiling has all these glittering minerals which sparkle like little stars at night quite nice to look at before sleeping. "p Had a couple af barbeque sessions including one yesterday which we invited our other Singaporean friends. Jumbo hotdogs wrapped in bacons, chicken breast chunks, garlic toast and fish and chips. Woo-hoo! Great for the cold night.
At Maswik Lodge eating and using the net, waiting for a friend to knock off work and we are going to Tusayan. Look around and eat steak. Heard about the Steakhouse there which serve reasonable food. Otherwise it's been pretty plain, looking forward to the upcoming Vegas trip.
Moved to a cabin room few days ago, which has our own toilet. And finally we are much nearer to the guys which are just a few room down. Our ceiling has all these glittering minerals which sparkle like little stars at night quite nice to look at before sleeping. "p Had a couple af barbeque sessions including one yesterday which we invited our other Singaporean friends. Jumbo hotdogs wrapped in bacons, chicken breast chunks, garlic toast and fish and chips. Woo-hoo! Great for the cold night.
At Maswik Lodge eating and using the net, waiting for a friend to knock off work and we are going to Tusayan. Look around and eat steak. Heard about the Steakhouse there which serve reasonable food. Otherwise it's been pretty plain, looking forward to the upcoming Vegas trip.
Thursday, 5 June 2008
Worn out
Sometimes I wonder how I ignore the many signs.
Blind myself out to the world.
To common sense.
To logic.
Sometimes I wonder how long I can last.
Wear myself thin every other moment.
I'm just tired.
I need a rest.
Blind myself out to the world.
To common sense.
To logic.
Sometimes I wonder how long I can last.
Wear myself thin every other moment.
I'm just tired.
I need a rest.
Monday, 26 May 2008
Visit to the watchtower
On our way there to the watchtower.
流星花园 Grand Canyon version
Me and Mei Lan
Trying to climb the canyon
The Ruins
流星花园 Grand Canyon version
Me and Mei Lan
Trying to climb the canyon
The Ruins
Beautiful scenery from the hole
At my workplace now which is called Maswik Lodge. Working as a cafeteria attendant here, serving food. Beginning to get bored of it. "p That aside my off day today and still lots of beautiful photos to upload, so wil make the best out of the stable connection now before the crowd comes in at dinner time. Freaking a lot of people now because of Memorial Day celebration. "p
View of the canyon behind us. Looks fake right?
The animal that scared the shit of out us at night. That's the real life size.
Went for a sunset tour earlier last week. Here's some photos.
The small stretch of river you see on the left is the Colorado river. Hopefully we'll make our way there on one of our off days together.
Next up funny photos up at the watchtower!!
View of the canyon behind us. Looks fake right?
The animal that scared the shit of out us at night. That's the real life size.
Went for a sunset tour earlier last week. Here's some photos.
The small stretch of river you see on the left is the Colorado river. Hopefully we'll make our way there on one of our off days together.
Next up funny photos up at the watchtower!!
Saturday, 17 May 2008
All the way from Grand Canyon Part 2
More photos of our 1st 3 days in the Canyon.
The Canyon after the snow
1st American breakfast. Look at the humongous portions, especially the pancakes. Stupid HK sticking his head into photos.
Our 1st snowman! His mouth, eyes and buttons were scraps found off the ground. "p
My own snow angel!!
After getting snowballed.. LOL!
Stinky mules (cross between a horse and a donkey), hate walking pass them. "p
Connection's cranky again so it's to be continued. Colorado river and sunset photos coming up.
The Canyon after the snow
1st American breakfast. Look at the humongous portions, especially the pancakes. Stupid HK sticking his head into photos.
Our 1st snowman! His mouth, eyes and buttons were scraps found off the ground. "p
My own snow angel!!
After getting snowballed.. LOL!
Stinky mules (cross between a horse and a donkey), hate walking pass them. "p
Connection's cranky again so it's to be continued. Colorado river and sunset photos coming up.
Thursday, 15 May 2008
All the way from Grand Canyon Part 1
The 3rd day in Grand Canyon, or affectionately known as GC. It was a mad rush from boarding the plane in Singapore until arriving in GC. The flights were so awfully long most of us were so glad when we got to Pheonix. 4 hours flight to Taipei, immediate transfer to a 11 hours flight to LA, then another 1 hour domestic flight to Pheonix. Took 20 hours to travel, including transit time. So glad to touch down man, and glad is a total understatement. Took the local bus service which arrived at Flagstaff at 2am before resting there for the night.
Baby & Orh-orh on the plane for the 1st time!
The sunset view from the plane
Cute little girl that sat in front of me. Loves peekaboo.
The gang in LA
1st meal in US
The 2nd day was administration at Flagstaff, travelling to GC and more administration at GC. Most of us were dead beat by the time we were done with the day. Anyway Flagstaff is a quiet, old town which Route 66 passes through, nothing exciting over there but with interesting old shops.
Pink Mustang!
"Hi, Loser"
HK's Church
Peeing by the road
Trying to mail Leon away (head's too big can't fit!!)
Magic School Bus!
3rd day (Tuesday) was the final part to the admin, after which we travelled around the canyon for photos. The most exciting part was that it snowed!!! Yes!! For a true Singapore-grown child, nothing beats seeing cold white snow. Snow-fight, snowman, smoky breaths and frostbites. All part of the package. Wrapped up in layers of thin clothes and jackets, I was totally unprepared for this weather, since I had signed up for summer travel, not winter. I’ll let photos do the talking. :)
Snowy morning
Ice-cream!
Snow angel in the making (freezing butt in the making too)
Self-pawned
Snow-fight!
Taking the leap!
to be continued...
Baby & Orh-orh on the plane for the 1st time!
The sunset view from the plane
Cute little girl that sat in front of me. Loves peekaboo.
The gang in LA
1st meal in US
The 2nd day was administration at Flagstaff, travelling to GC and more administration at GC. Most of us were dead beat by the time we were done with the day. Anyway Flagstaff is a quiet, old town which Route 66 passes through, nothing exciting over there but with interesting old shops.
Pink Mustang!
"Hi, Loser"
HK's Church
Peeing by the road
Trying to mail Leon away (head's too big can't fit!!)
Magic School Bus!
3rd day (Tuesday) was the final part to the admin, after which we travelled around the canyon for photos. The most exciting part was that it snowed!!! Yes!! For a true Singapore-grown child, nothing beats seeing cold white snow. Snow-fight, snowman, smoky breaths and frostbites. All part of the package. Wrapped up in layers of thin clothes and jackets, I was totally unprepared for this weather, since I had signed up for summer travel, not winter. I’ll let photos do the talking. :)
Snowy morning
Ice-cream!
Snow angel in the making (freezing butt in the making too)
Self-pawned
Snow-fight!
Taking the leap!
to be continued...
Thursday, 1 May 2008
Wednesday, 30 April 2008
Farewell Grandpa
He left quietly in the morning. He chose to be alone. Probably didn't bear to have his children send him off. Maybe he felt the grief will be too much for them. He somehow had it all planned.
Yesterday evening, I received the call with the news from my sister. Mum had told her not to inform me until they were sure I had finished my exam. Everyone seemed so calm. Everyone was prepared for it. I was too. When I went down to the wake, no one was sad, or at least no one was showing it. They were either chatting, folding "money" for grandpa or entertaining the distant relatives that came to pay their respects. I joined my cousins and burn some "money" for grandpa. We ended up catching up with what each of us are doing. It was bonding between the family at a occasion of separation. Ironic, but I guess we can take it as the passing down of the bond. Our grandpa's bond with us, passed to us to strengthen our bonds with each other.
There are still issues unsettled in the family but all seems minute at such a time. Grandma's health is one, but it seems like a blessing for her at a time for this. Mummy told me she cried when they brought her to see grandpa, but soon after she left she couldn't remember a thing she saw. It was amusing to know that she thought it was because she hadn't taken care of grandpa. She didn't know about grandpa's condition, or maybe I should say she couldn't remember.
Whatever the case, grandpa planned it out for us and made sure everyone was mentally prepared for it too. Thank you, grandpa. Rest in peace.
Yesterday evening, I received the call with the news from my sister. Mum had told her not to inform me until they were sure I had finished my exam. Everyone seemed so calm. Everyone was prepared for it. I was too. When I went down to the wake, no one was sad, or at least no one was showing it. They were either chatting, folding "money" for grandpa or entertaining the distant relatives that came to pay their respects. I joined my cousins and burn some "money" for grandpa. We ended up catching up with what each of us are doing. It was bonding between the family at a occasion of separation. Ironic, but I guess we can take it as the passing down of the bond. Our grandpa's bond with us, passed to us to strengthen our bonds with each other.
There are still issues unsettled in the family but all seems minute at such a time. Grandma's health is one, but it seems like a blessing for her at a time for this. Mummy told me she cried when they brought her to see grandpa, but soon after she left she couldn't remember a thing she saw. It was amusing to know that she thought it was because she hadn't taken care of grandpa. She didn't know about grandpa's condition, or maybe I should say she couldn't remember.
Whatever the case, grandpa planned it out for us and made sure everyone was mentally prepared for it too. Thank you, grandpa. Rest in peace.
Saturday, 26 April 2008
Fragile
Was in the hospital the whole of last night. The beeping of the machine and the hard breaths through the respirator. How can life be so fragile? The family that didn't seem very close to start with, all seem to feel the pain yesterday. The decision was hard, but it seemed right. It was painful for him and it was for us to see him that way. Mummy was so upset I really didn't know was to do. Please stay strong and get well, grandpa. At least for my mummy's sake.
Saturday, 19 April 2008
Grad trip Excitement
Just attended a time-wasting orientation by our sponsor for our Work-and-Travel program. I don't understand why they call themselves our sponsor 'cause I ain't receiving any money from them! "p
That's side-tracking from the purpose of this entry which is to show how excited I'm getting!! wOO-hOo!! Yup it's official, the employer has been fixed, the tickets are booked, it's just left with my lugguage to pack. Still a tad bit early to pack considering I'm still having exams and FYP's not finished (Anyone with contact for A1 poster printing please let me know k?). Was talking to ML during to orientation and it seems like her excitement was pretty contagious and I'm infected! We have the option of travelling to Mexico even! wOo-hOO!! But that's provided the rest of my group wants to, but Las Vegas's good enough! Met more friends just now which also added to the excitement. My 1st 3 month JC 绯闻 senior during was going too on the same flight, which is so 巧! The 绯闻 was just a prank played by the seniors then, so don't read too much into it. Haha! Don't wish to set my expectations too high, 'cause I'm afraid I wouldn't get much travelling time since I'm planning to come back for convo. But no regrets 'cause the friends back at home are pretty fun to be with too, not to forget the convo ball! If anyone knows of any DIE-DIE-MUST-VISIT places in US especially in the West, TELL ME TELL ME TELL ME!!! Need to plan my time (and money) carefully. "p
As for job search, I'm trying not to get too troubled over it. I guess I'll survive as long as I'm not picky. Just hope for the best.
That's side-tracking from the purpose of this entry which is to show how excited I'm getting!! wOO-hOo!! Yup it's official, the employer has been fixed, the tickets are booked, it's just left with my lugguage to pack. Still a tad bit early to pack considering I'm still having exams and FYP's not finished (Anyone with contact for A1 poster printing please let me know k?). Was talking to ML during to orientation and it seems like her excitement was pretty contagious and I'm infected! We have the option of travelling to Mexico even! wOo-hOO!! But that's provided the rest of my group wants to, but Las Vegas's good enough! Met more friends just now which also added to the excitement. My 1st 3 month JC 绯闻 senior during was going too on the same flight, which is so 巧! The 绯闻 was just a prank played by the seniors then, so don't read too much into it. Haha! Don't wish to set my expectations too high, 'cause I'm afraid I wouldn't get much travelling time since I'm planning to come back for convo. But no regrets 'cause the friends back at home are pretty fun to be with too, not to forget the convo ball! If anyone knows of any DIE-DIE-MUST-VISIT places in US especially in the West, TELL ME TELL ME TELL ME!!! Need to plan my time (and money) carefully. "p
As for job search, I'm trying not to get too troubled over it. I guess I'll survive as long as I'm not picky. Just hope for the best.
Friday, 11 April 2008
《那女孩对我说》
心很空天很大云很重
我恨孤单却赶不走
捧着她的名字
她的喜怒哀乐
往前走多久了
一个人心中
只有一个宝贝
久了之后
她变成了眼泪
泪一滴在左手
凝固成为寂寞
往回看有什么
那女孩对我说
说我保护她的梦
说这个世界
对她这样的不多
她渐渐忘了我
但是她并不晓得
遍体麟伤的我
一天也没再爱过
那女孩对我说
说我是一个小偷
偷她的回忆
塞进我的脑海中
我不需要自由
只想背着她的梦
一步步向前走
她给的永远不重
Got pretty hooked on this song recently. Sweet and Simple
我恨孤单却赶不走
捧着她的名字
她的喜怒哀乐
往前走多久了
一个人心中
只有一个宝贝
久了之后
她变成了眼泪
泪一滴在左手
凝固成为寂寞
往回看有什么
那女孩对我说
说我保护她的梦
说这个世界
对她这样的不多
她渐渐忘了我
但是她并不晓得
遍体麟伤的我
一天也没再爱过
那女孩对我说
说我是一个小偷
偷她的回忆
塞进我的脑海中
我不需要自由
只想背着她的梦
一步步向前走
她给的永远不重
Got pretty hooked on this song recently. Sweet and Simple
Thursday, 10 April 2008
Final Dash
Haven't been a good girl when it comes to blogging and keeping my friends and readers updated. But trust me this is going to change.
WHY?
It's my last semester in school. The last time I can see occupation on an application form and write "STUDENT". Reality started to kick in a couple of weeks back when I was rushing my FYP and design project. Whether or not I'll be doing what I'm currently studying isn't the issue. The fact that being away from school equates to end of hostel life, end of lecture chit-chatting, end of tutorial and assignment rushing (this is probably the only good thing). Doing an assignment wrongly in school merely just means poor grades, nothing too extreme such as expulsion. Working is another thing altogether. Daddy kept telling me "Working is different", but it's something I've yet to truly discover even after attachment and the part-time stints.
Lucky for me this exam period isn't that stressful, so that cuts back on 1 bad school memory. Design's bad, but it was pretty fun staying back with friends in school, seeing each other stress ourselves dry. Starting to miss my hostel life too. The late nights, suppers, LAN gaming, illegal MJ sessions, meeting my dear everyday. My life's changing and I don't know if I can handle it. Maintaining relationships will be tougher, considering the amount of time and chances to meet is much much lesser.
Whatever the case, let's just all jiayou for now! The last month of our carefree student life. Live it to the max! UsH!! LOL!
WHY?
It's my last semester in school. The last time I can see occupation on an application form and write "STUDENT". Reality started to kick in a couple of weeks back when I was rushing my FYP and design project. Whether or not I'll be doing what I'm currently studying isn't the issue. The fact that being away from school equates to end of hostel life, end of lecture chit-chatting, end of tutorial and assignment rushing (this is probably the only good thing). Doing an assignment wrongly in school merely just means poor grades, nothing too extreme such as expulsion. Working is another thing altogether. Daddy kept telling me "Working is different", but it's something I've yet to truly discover even after attachment and the part-time stints.
Lucky for me this exam period isn't that stressful, so that cuts back on 1 bad school memory. Design's bad, but it was pretty fun staying back with friends in school, seeing each other stress ourselves dry. Starting to miss my hostel life too. The late nights, suppers, LAN gaming, illegal MJ sessions, meeting my dear everyday. My life's changing and I don't know if I can handle it. Maintaining relationships will be tougher, considering the amount of time and chances to meet is much much lesser.
Whatever the case, let's just all jiayou for now! The last month of our carefree student life. Live it to the max! UsH!! LOL!
Friday, 22 February 2008
Life always gets you down.. Somehow
It's one of those days where nothing seems to go as you would have preferred it be. After a nearly perfect week of the valentine's hype, this week was far from anything I consider good. In fact to say that is a total understatement, it's bad if you asked me.
Supposed to be mugging away for my quiz in the afternoon, but I'm just not in the mood at all. Nothing's going in anyway. There a constant clash to plans, which isn't in my control either. It's an "either-or" situation, no compromise or any shit like that. I hate it.
It feels worse when others can't understand that it's not a matter of first-come-first-served, but importance of reponsibilities. If I had the choice, I wouldn't want to have to constantly change my holiday plans over a stupid project that just wouldn't work.
The once motivated and on-the-ball attitude has gone back to its hometown. It's hard to get moving even if I've managed to start. I guess it's all because of myself, no one else to blame. Feel like a total loser. A jerk that screws up. A scum to the people I'm around. Sometimes I wonder, am I still good at anything? I seriously doubt, probably just at messing up my life.
Supposed to be mugging away for my quiz in the afternoon, but I'm just not in the mood at all. Nothing's going in anyway. There a constant clash to plans, which isn't in my control either. It's an "either-or" situation, no compromise or any shit like that. I hate it.
It feels worse when others can't understand that it's not a matter of first-come-first-served, but importance of reponsibilities. If I had the choice, I wouldn't want to have to constantly change my holiday plans over a stupid project that just wouldn't work.
The once motivated and on-the-ball attitude has gone back to its hometown. It's hard to get moving even if I've managed to start. I guess it's all because of myself, no one else to blame. Feel like a total loser. A jerk that screws up. A scum to the people I'm around. Sometimes I wonder, am I still good at anything? I seriously doubt, probably just at messing up my life.
Tuesday, 29 January 2008
Gearing up, Moving on
Finally gotten down to sending out my resumes, the process has been slow but it's picking up. Hopefully I'll receive favourable news before I leave in May.
Anyway I'll be leaving for US in early May for Work & Travel. Will be at Grand Canyon for 2 months until mid July. Pretty excited but at the same time worried that if anything goes wrong with my FYP it'll affect all my plans. Reality's beginning to set in ever since this last semester started. Modules I'm taking are more practical and inclined to preparing us for working life. My mentality has finally caught up with my actual time in my life. Anyway it's probably because I see several peers already clinching ideal jobs even before graduation, while I sit here worrying if I'll even get an interview. Why does it have to be so pessimistic? I used to tell myself no rush, the right job will come in time, yet when I'm actually in the position of job search I feel extremely panicky.
Probably it's the expectations I set upon myself that I have to have a job after I graduate, or in the case now after I return from USA. Then there's the issue of a job and a career. Do I just want to get a salary or is job satisfaction more important? In the past, we easily answer those question with the normal TYS answers, but reality really creeps in so discreetly that those oh-so-easy questions don't seems so easy after all.
I'll be trying my luck on anything that remotely interest me (yes, my interest is still a factor, how matter small it might be). Give myself a reality check and for all I know I could land myself in a pretty desirable situation. Meanwhile I'll be enjoying my remaining days as a full-time student staying on campus.
Sleeping time. Night.
Anyway I'll be leaving for US in early May for Work & Travel. Will be at Grand Canyon for 2 months until mid July. Pretty excited but at the same time worried that if anything goes wrong with my FYP it'll affect all my plans. Reality's beginning to set in ever since this last semester started. Modules I'm taking are more practical and inclined to preparing us for working life. My mentality has finally caught up with my actual time in my life. Anyway it's probably because I see several peers already clinching ideal jobs even before graduation, while I sit here worrying if I'll even get an interview. Why does it have to be so pessimistic? I used to tell myself no rush, the right job will come in time, yet when I'm actually in the position of job search I feel extremely panicky.
Probably it's the expectations I set upon myself that I have to have a job after I graduate, or in the case now after I return from USA. Then there's the issue of a job and a career. Do I just want to get a salary or is job satisfaction more important? In the past, we easily answer those question with the normal TYS answers, but reality really creeps in so discreetly that those oh-so-easy questions don't seems so easy after all.
I'll be trying my luck on anything that remotely interest me (yes, my interest is still a factor, how matter small it might be). Give myself a reality check and for all I know I could land myself in a pretty desirable situation. Meanwhile I'll be enjoying my remaining days as a full-time student staying on campus.
Sleeping time. Night.
Thursday, 3 January 2008
Fruitless.
It's a new year, but yet I feel totally lousy. Haven't done much this few days of the new year. Although I've been telling myself to take out the video I took on New Year Countdown at Esplanade, I haven't done it till now and I don't feel motivated to do so still. Things are beginning to clash again as my busy January begins. Miscomm is just one of the few problems I seem to be facing. Just a darn start to a supposed good year of 2008. Haven't been very good for me. Just hope it can't get any worse.
Happy New Year everyone.
Happy New Year everyone.
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