26th feb 2011

Feels loved.

(:

23rd

Happy 23rd to me.

A night well spent with cousins.

A year to finally get out of school.

A year older

Hopefully a year wiser too

Happy birthday to you.


From me.

Dispensable

Feeling used and utilized.

I'm here when they need a ear.

And when i need a ear... (and they are aware)

They disappear.

When things don't go right despite my advice.

I get subtly blamed.

There seems to be no more common topic between us.

And i only get to talk to you when you need advice.

If that's your definition of friendship.

I have nothing to say.

It's disappointing how people treat each other at times.

People change and i've become dispensable, or so it seems.

Talk about recycling.

Meow

I look at him.

And it puts my heart at ease.

I feel so comfortable and peaceful just looking at him.

Calms my nerves,

Soothes my fears,

Comforts my emotions.

When i'm torn and tattered after a long week out.

I thank heavens for letting him into my life.

As i'm typing this, he's sound asleep in my room.

Tired.

I'm so tired.

0730 to 2130 every single day.

Non stop.

Mugging when i'm back.

Studying for 4 competencies.

Sleeping with the lights on cos i doze off.

So tired.

I need to oil this machinery.

):

It doesn't help to help others when you end up in trouble yourself.

And worse of all,

You don't get appreciated.

And the blame gets subtly pushed to you.

And to begin with....

You've had a bad day too.

What a horrible day in school.


I guess in everyone's heart, only they themselves matter the most.

To hell with the others.

Right?

It doesn't pay to be kind.

I totally understand now.

Focus

Focus.

Hocus Pocus didn't work.

Somethings will be gone before you know it.

Especially when waiting takes too long.
I've moved on.

Right now.

I just want to focus.

Laughs

I laugh at your assumption.
I laugh at how inadequate you feel.
And i laugh at you for being such a huge hypocrite.
I laugh at how you think you know me.
And i laugh at your silly tactics.
You make me so sick, i can't stand the sight of you.
It's ironic i have to see you so often.
Makes me feel so disgusted.
And today is one of the day you totally ruin my day.
And i marvel at how well you picked the time, choosing to ruin it at the end of the day.
Thanks man Mr S*#)(@*#)(@*#(
Hypocrites.
HAh.
Get off my back will ya?

Nostalgia

Saw a patient whom we saw when we first started clinics.

Felt so nostalgic.

Suddenly i think i will miss school when i grad.

I get my fair share of shit, i think more than others.

But somehow i think through all these hardships...

I've really bonded well with a few close friends.

I'll definitely miss being with them after school till 930pm in lab,

Going for dinners, going for ice cream, late night movies in hall,

Walking back together.

HTHT after a long period of sucky days in school, bitching about classmates, assessors etc etc.

I think certain things happen for a reason.

For me, i think this has been a period of training for me.

And i think w/o these few wonderful people, life would have been so different.

I am ever so thankful to have met them.