I'm off shift work for at least two months. No more night shifts for now.
I'm officially training in ultrasound...something that i love so much and yet waited so long for.
Its strange when I finally got in...there wasn't any ecstatic feeling. Maybe 'cos i waited sooo long till its no longer something with the "YAY!!! factor".

Nonetheless, i'm happy that at least i have a modality now. Training has been quite tough and i've been working hard at it. Just feel more stressed and tired as usual. I hope I can do it well.
Life now revolves around working, practicing and studying.

Lesser time for social life! lol... i'd try to dig out time yah... =)

The past week has been hectic for me. But i guess its alright.
I slept for 10hours last night. 'Cos there's no prayer session today.
But...i gotta do night shift. Not that I mind though...'cos i don't wish to do more inconvenience to my colleagues. They covered my duties while I was away.
Gotta rush down to another morning prayer session on sunday morning right after my night shift.
I just hope I won't unknowingly fall asleep...

Tears just rolled down my face unknowingly as we performed the last rituals to send ah gong off.
I didn't cry until today. Until i'm literally faced with the fact that he IS really going away and never returning.
I guess when its time, its time to go. I see life and death situations everyday in the hospital...i guess i could cope a little better.

Sometimes it takes a death in the family to bring everyone together. This is the first death so far i've witnessed in my maternal family. And its the first that all of us worked together. This is the first time I've seen all of us united as one. For the first time, I felt the love...the invisible strong bond.

At the end of the day, I question myself....have I worked too hard that I've neglected my family?
Ah gong was admitted into hospital on the same evening that I was supposed to do night shift.
I asked my mum what happened..and she said it was just an infection and he could talk and was only on antibiotics. So I didnt go down to see him that night, instead I went to do my night shift. Maybe he was blessing me that night....'cos it wasn't busy at all, I didn't have a single OT case. Even CT had zero cases, inpatients a small bunch and portable morning rounds was only 7 for entire hospital. I just wished I had gone down to see him before he went off.
I'm happy that at least he went in his sleep peacefully.
I'm not the best granddaughter, but i do love him.

Thank you ah gong for everything.
You'll always be etched deeply in my heart.
I know you're off to a better place now.
Will miss you greatly.

Ah gong just passed away... =(
Hope he's in a better place now.

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