Reminds me so much of how many people have said things to me that they don't really mean. The inspiration behind this song was the story of Chris Medina from American Idol Season 10. How he stood by his fiancee even after a car accident left her brain damaged, how he was always there for her and stood by and is still standing by her as they go through this TOGETHER.

Sometimes things like these make me wonder if there really is someone out there for someone like me. My friends and family believe that there is, but I've always been doubtful. My friends think that someone like me is bound to find someone who is perfect for me. But I know that no one person is perfect. That we're all perfectly imperfect.

There's this dull ache in my heart that I just can't explain. Sometimes I feel like I've already left my greatest love. Or rather that my greatest love has rejected me. That seeing him always places this dull ache in my heart.

I try to be content with the comments and remarks and points of flattery that other guys give me. But its not the same as that one person who believes in everything that you are, who knows you so well. I know I have that person in my BFF Claudia, but sharing that with someone else, its just something completely different. Not more, or less, just different. I think its cause I've been listening to Trisha Yearwood's This is Me You're Talking To. The chorus of it all really reminds me of this particular someone. Well of two particular someones. The chorus goes like this..

"Me, the one who really knows you

Me, the one whose heart you've broken

Me, the one who was still hoping

You might be missing me"

And I mean, I really do fell like that most of the time. I waste so much of my time on other guys when in actual fact I know who I want. Its a matter of if he wants me too. I thought I was really truly over it all because it was such a long time ago. But this is one thing I don't want to let slip away without even trying.

What Are Words by Chris Medina

Anywhere you are, I am near

Anywhere you go, I'll be there

Anytime you whisper my name, you'll see

How every single promise I keep

Cause what kind of guy would I be

If I was to leave when you need me most

What are words

If you really odn't mean them

When you say them

What are words

If they're only for good times

Then they don't

When it's love

Yeah, you say them out loud

Those words, They never go away

They live on, even when we're gone

And I know an angel was sent just for me

And I know I'm meant to be where I am

And I'm gonna be

Standing right beside her tonight

And I'm gonna be by your side

I would never leave when she needs me most

What are words

If you really don't mean them

When you say them

What are words

If they're only for good times

Then they don't

When it's love

Yeah, you say them out loud

Those words, They never go away

They live on, even when we're gone

Anywhere you are, I am near

Anywhere you go, I'll be there

And I'm gonna be here forever more

Every single promise I keep

Cause what kind of guy would I be

If I was to leave when you need me most

I'm forever keeping my angel close

1. I've in essence, graduated from Polytechnic

2. Started working with my parents company.

They may seem like very little, but they're both huge accomplishments in my life. 3 years of my life has gone into going to school and pursuing my Diploma in Biomedical Science. Sure, I didn't put in all the effort I could have, but I think its important to acknowledge that I actually made it through those 3 years.

I think the one thing that enriched my school life the most, was joining Republic Rhapsody or Rhapsody for short. My school's premier acapella group. I was so glad that I found them. I remember when I saw their showcase, I thought to myself, "How can they go up there and give a substandard performance?" But, nonetheless, I signed up and made it my mission to make the group better. That year we had our first big performance in the Studio and the following year, my efforts was recognised when I became the President. Becoming President of Rhapsody made me open my eyes to the amount of work that could be done, areas in which we could and had to improve. Effecting change isn't an easy thing to do. I'm not even sure if I did effect change, but I'd like to think I did. At least in some small way. Rhapsody was and always will be an amazingly huge part of me.

Being in the group also opened up a great many doors for me. I was able to attend management, production and emceeing workshops. That truly made me see how much it takes to putt on a show and such. Emceeing for the Jam 'n' Hop in 2009 and emceeing for all the events then was such an enriching experience. I never thought I'd be good at hyping a crowed up. But apparently if you put me with the right person with the right crowd, I'm kinda awesome. Jam 'n' Hop gave me the opportunity to do a duet with a friend of mine, Jean. I remember singing "Who Knew" by Pink with her. I remember jumping around and listening to the crowd sing along. Doing that made me realise how much I really love singing and performing.

I had an amazing 3 years in Republic Polytechnic. It may not seem like much to most, but no matter the reputation the school holds and my dislike of many things that happened, I think the great memories I've gained through my musical experience there has helped me through a great deal and has allowed me to meet amazingly talented people and has in some way made me part of the person I am and am becoming to be.