is it the fatigue, the sense of purposeless endeavors, the uninspiring environment, the lack of real communication, being 'back' home ? - i've lost my heart. i remember how in amsterdam, i had found peace and ease and - happiness - in the work i did, in my 'self'. and now, i shuffle between feelings of impotence, discontent, and guilt (really, at this terrible state i've locked myself in, and the failure to appreciate all the opportunities given to me). dfw asks repeatedly, why are we, privileged and all, so damn unhappy? why? is it really the move back to singapore or is it just that difference between school and work life? i must be a brat. or something.