Dust and dusk and dawn

the nights are so still here in antwerp

The sea is calm
Through handmade lenses
Like animals
In soundless dreams
Like animals
In bottles of butter
A miniature sailboat
Tin foil and paper
The waves are big
And there's a warm wind

(the sea is calm, cocorosie)

i would like some clarity, some light on the horizon. i don't want to forget or to let things descend into fictitious visions. every step i take is marked by your presence / absence. we've exhausted ourselves. i've exhausted myself. i'm not unhappy; i just want some real-ness.