That's it, I am gonna rant.
I don't care how you guys are gonna troll my blog.
Curse me and swear all you want, do it to our relationship as well,
I wouldn't mind since curses don't exist.
Stopped believing in them after realising no matter how much I curse you guys
None of you appeared in the orbituary.
I declare; I really dislike you.
Like a puppet, you tried to manipulate and eliminate your eyesore
I can't believe you could backstab someone
And act all friendly with that person in just a while.
Nobody can take how you exaggerates things or stuff words into others' mouth.
You twist facts to suit your needs, how convenient huh?
Look at what you have done to the club, so filled with fucking politics.
Can't you just keep all the comments and jealousy to yourself
Instead of trying so hard just to get rid of that person?
You are sloppy, and I really don't like it.
But I won't do anything about it from now on,
Cos' I have already warned you before.
Like you said, we need to have faith in you.
So I took those words and trusted that you have enough responsibility to take care of your own future.
Ultimately, it's your life, not mine.
I will continue walking straight, I wouldn't stop nor wait.
And I will not allow you to clip my wings.
I'll leave it up to you to chase after me, or continue dragging your feet behind.
But bear this in mind;
As I move further in front of you,
I would meet more opportunities and choices.
Anything could change.
If I realised that you couldn't keep up,
You can't blame me for finding one that could.
Posted by Zhu-An at 12:10 AM
小时候啊, 当我做错事,
被妈妈骂和教训过后,
我都会忍不住在她面前大哭.
但是,每一次我开始向她道歉和掉泪,
她都会打我耳光, 并且问我道歉的理由.
我通常都答不出来, 结果就会继续受打.
之后,妈妈都会告诉我,
如果我是真心知道自己做错了并道歉,
她不会阻止我哭泣.
但如果我是因为觉得不服气,
为了皮外上的痛而逼自己道歉,
就值得再被她惩罚.
小时候我不明白这个道理,
常常认为她只是在找借口打我.
我都已经认错了,她还需要这样惩罚我吗?
如今,经历了这么多次同样的局面后,
我终于明白了.
如果有一天,我认为你犯了错,
我不希望你为了满足我,敷衍我而向我道歉.
这种虚伪的和解词,我不想听.
就因为我知道你根本不明白我为何会伤心.
若继续这样,终有一天,我们都会受不了.
我已经没有信心了.
不知何时开始,已在倒数那一天的来临,太可悲了.
Posted by Zhu-An at 12:10 AM
为什么不会担心我
失踪了两个小时
你也不查问我为什么不能和你共餐
是否在外头淋了雨
你连回一个简讯也没有
我只是说我想在外头转一转
并没有阻止你打通电话给我
晚餐时间都快到了
难道你就不担心我那两个钟头到底在干什么?
难道不好奇我为什么不想和你用餐?
你下课了也不通知我一声,
难道你认为我那天不想见你吗?
对,是我无理取闹
我真的要求太多了
你从来都不会多问,不懂得主动.
我又何必奢望这一次会有任何改变?
你可以怪我双面,可以嫌我莫名其妙.
我们真的太不同了
如果是我,我会希望知道你的去处
我会想问你几点才会过来
我会试着劝你,告诉你我会等你一起吃饭
两个小时..对你来说或许根本不算什么
你根本不顾失去那两个小时的相处时间
对,就因为我们俩人不同
所以我决定了
从今天开始, 你不会再碰到这样的事情
因为我不会再有这样的期待
我只会等,反正在这感情开始之前也都在等
我累了,不希望一直都是我在维持着份感情
Posted by Zhu-An at 1:17 PM
上一次微笑之後
世界遺漏了什麼
怎麼會突然忘了 許多感動
難過的事總有好多
頭頂的天空總是灰濛濛
流淚的時候
卻忘了為什麼
淡紅色指頭 陪我煎熬
黑色破曉 在嘴邊咬了又咬
我好想忘掉 為何煩惱
對著天空大聲的叫
下次微笑 你會看到
我真心上揚我嘴角
有人會在天涯海角 種一片草原
看我奔跑
下次微笑 我會驕傲
放晴的感覺多麼好
不放棄總會等得到
我那熬過風暴 真的微笑
Posted by Zhu-An at 3:41 AM
At long last, the holidays are here!
So Dardar and I have decided to focus on our cosplay plans (:
The cosplay for Cosfest Day 2 would stay as a secret,
Day 1 would be Magna Carta II, with BenJ as Juto, Nazmi as Sheunzeit and me as..
Okay i cant confirm it yet xD
Anyway, I successfully psychoed BenJ to cos another character that doesn't wears a helm (again)
Hmmm, lately a lot of people are quitting cosplay ):
After Shizu, Jesuke mentioned in her blog that she's quitting next year as well..
Ahhhh Jesuke-sama~ DDD:
I wonder when it would be time for us to quit as well,
since we cant be cosplaying even after we graduated.. (maybe)
Arghh i started cosplaying too late. Hehehe
Oh Ah xuan and I went back to Nan Chiau High today!
Cos Mingfang is now a relief teacher there, she offered to smuggle us into the school.
A-level results have just announced,
Mingfang got straight As and Bs for her subjects,
and Xuan also managed to get average grades despite getting hooked onto Anime
But Shell seems to be pretty chui now x.x
So sad for her, her grades are even better than Xuan, excluding GP which she failed.
Ahhh I feel like tutoring primary school students as a part-time job like what Mingfang is doing now.
She said she is earning quite a lot of money with tutoring o.0
But sua la, with my temper, i don't think i have enough patience to teach. *laughs*
EHHH? I thought I said my posts couldnt be taken seriously~~
I am glad so many people are concerned with what I type though
Benj and I are fine now, so thank you guys! ^^
- from
attention whore SEEKER LOL
(dun use such a crude word to degrade yourself, troll! ^^)
Posted by Zhu-An at 5:17 PM
How would you react?
To hear a comment from your partner
Saying that you are plain and does not stand out from the crowd.
I would actually feel alright if it he/she is a nobody, though it still hurts.
But these words coming out from your partner
Just proves that you are not special in the eyes of someone you love.
It could be a critical blow to your pride and confidence,
As a normal human would yearn to get acknowledged and stay unique to your partner's heart.
*Sigh* Isn't it just saddening? D:
Okay nevermind, this is only a rant, so don't treat it too seriously.
Posted by Zhu-An at 11:47 PM
I don't get it!
You always complained that issues that you have raised would be avoided by me and there will be a change in topic.
But what can I do if you were expecting an answer but I really have nothing to share?
I am not that sensitive to problems, in the first place, at those moments, I don't see any problems.
If you really have something to say about it, then why didn't you continue sharing?
I brought up other topics to cover the silence because you didn't continue on your point!
What the heck are you thinking?
Whenever we meet up, we were fine, still happy together.
And then you go emo-ing for god-knows-what reason, when I didn't see anything wrong.
I mean, fuck it.
You used to be able to speak normally with me, just by calling my name, we would all be in a serious tone and ready for conversation.
You used to be able to console me and bring back my smile so easily, just by doing some silly actions. I liked you for that, remember?
Now that you are so eager to bring them up, fine.
I WILL EMO WITH YOU, and lets destroy this relationship together.
My patience is ceasing along with my faith in this relationship.
It has always been good until you brought up all the emo-ness.
I really thought we could spend everyday happily together.
Why is it so hard to achieve, despite me trying so hard to spice it up?
I am so tired and I'm crying so hard.
I can't believe it is endng like this.
I am so disappointed.
Posted by Zhu-An at 11:45 AM
