Layer ONE : On the Outside
Name: Natasha Joan Noronha
Birth Date: 12 October 1990
Current Status: Physically attached to one guy, emotionally attached to another.
Eye color: usually brown, unless i spent the night getting pisst drunk at sanctuary.
Hair Color: brownish la.
Righty or Lefty: Righty baby.
Zodiac Sign: Libra
Layer TWO : On the inside
Your Heritage: Portugese, Irish, Chinese and Punjabi.
Your Fears: Heights, tiny crawling things, enclosed spaces, getting hurt beyond belief.
Your Weaknesses: Ppl who need my help, chocolate.
Your Perfect Pizza: Sambal ikan bilis with pepperoni.
Layer THREE : Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow
Your thoughts first waking up: Owh shit, I'm sure I'm late for something.
Your Bedtime: 3 am or so.
Your most missed memory: Doesn't matter
Layer FOUR : Your Pick
Pepsi or Coke: Used to be Pepsi but now addicted to Coke
McDonald's or Burger King: Mc D all the way.
Single or group dates: They're both fun, but I prefer single dates
Adidas or Nike: NIKE!!!!!
Lipton tea or Nestea: Err...neither?
Chocolate or vanilla: Choc choc choc choc choc
Cappuccino or coffee: Coffee...tho ive never really seen the difference
Layer FIVE : Do you
Smoke: Depends on your definition of the word?
Curse: ALLLLL the time
Layer SIX : In the Past Month
Drank alcohol: yeap, it was fun
Gone to the mall: ALmost every day
Been on stage: NOt really lor
Eaten sushi: yea of course
Dyed your hair: I'm pokai dammit!!! and my stylist is on 'long leave'
Layer SEVEN: Have You Ever?
Played a stripping game: I think so, tho i dun think it got very far.
Changed who you were to fit in: Not conciously
Layer EIGHTAge you're hoping to be married : Omg, I have waaaaay too many things to worry about right now, don't ask me about plans for the future please and thank you
Layer NINE: In a Girl/Guy.
Best eye colour: Grey.
Best hair colour: Dark brown.
Short or long hair: Short but designer messy
Layer TEN: What Were You Doing.
1 minute ago: This.
1 hour ago: Eating dinner.
4.5 hours ago: Hanging at the Curve
1 month ago: Working.
1 year ago: Studying
Layer ELEVEN : Finish The Sentence
I love: being in love.
I feel: tired depressed and confused
I hate: getting hurt
I hide: secrets from people
I miss: A lvls
I need: To get a grip and face reality
Thursday, September 4
Tuesday, August 12
Thursday, August 7
A little to much to handle
Ugh, my lack of blogging-ness is annoying even me.
And it's not that there isn't anything to blog about, it's because there's just too much to blog about. Just thinking about the amazing experiences I've been having makes me too lazy and too tired to blog.
So for now I'm going to say this much, 'I can't see clearly yet, the rain has not left. I'm still confused.'
Loveliness...
And it's not that there isn't anything to blog about, it's because there's just too much to blog about. Just thinking about the amazing experiences I've been having makes me too lazy and too tired to blog.
So for now I'm going to say this much, 'I can't see clearly yet, the rain has not left. I'm still confused.'
Loveliness...
Wednesday, July 30
Friday, July 11
I've Been Tagged
1. At what age do you wish to marry?
Hmm, probably when I'm 25-30
2. Where will you go if someone sponsored you a tour ticket?
I would go for a trip around the world.
3. What's your favourite thing to do?
I don't think I have a favourite thing. As long as I have something to do with people I like I'm fine.
4. Do you thnk money can buy happiness?
It depends what you percieve to be happiness. For me money may buy things that help in making me happy, but it won't buy me happiness.
5. Do you believe you can survive without money?
If I get sent back to when cavemen wrote on walls then yea. But if you're talking about the 21st century, of course not. Money is almost synonymous with survival.
6. What are you afraid to lose the most?
My freedom and ability to think and decide what is right for me.
7. If you win one million what would you do?
I would put most of it in my ASB account where I get almost 10% interest and use a small portion to treat my friends and family and of course myself. How is it fun if it's not shared right? Owh and I'll also give my 10% and help the poor. Whatever I give I recieve fourfold. Or so I'm told.
8. Dream job?
On an island somewhere with someone with me to keep me company, writing a novel with an amazing plot that is based mainly on my life thus far.
9. List 3 good things bout the person who tagged you.
Person 1: Outspoken. Reliable. Spontaneous.
Person 2: Talkative. Outgoing. Active.
10. If you only had one wish what would it be?
I would wish for more wishes!!! And if I can't do that....I'll wish for someone who wants and needs me as much as I need him. Lol. I know, shallow.
11. If you could rewind time, would you?
I might, once in a while to relive the best times of my life.
12. What's your ambition?
To be successful, and to lead a happy full life.
13. If you can teleport once, where would you go?
The moon, I'll be the first woman on the moon. And then I'll worry about getting back later.
14. What do you think is the most important in your life?
People.
15. If you could undo one mistake in the past, what would you do?
I would be more careful, and not as naive.
16. If you had a chance what part of your character would you change?
My tendency to worry too much and the whining that comes with it.
17. What music have you been listening to lately?
A lot of oldies.
18. What is the one thing you cannot do but wish you could?
I wish I could control my emotions.
19. What is your dream at this vey second?
That I can go out and shoot the chickens...
20. What type of people annoy you?
People who don't keep their promises and think that they're above everyone else.
Hmm, probably when I'm 25-30
2. Where will you go if someone sponsored you a tour ticket?
I would go for a trip around the world.
3. What's your favourite thing to do?
I don't think I have a favourite thing. As long as I have something to do with people I like I'm fine.
4. Do you thnk money can buy happiness?
It depends what you percieve to be happiness. For me money may buy things that help in making me happy, but it won't buy me happiness.
5. Do you believe you can survive without money?
If I get sent back to when cavemen wrote on walls then yea. But if you're talking about the 21st century, of course not. Money is almost synonymous with survival.
6. What are you afraid to lose the most?
My freedom and ability to think and decide what is right for me.
7. If you win one million what would you do?
I would put most of it in my ASB account where I get almost 10% interest and use a small portion to treat my friends and family and of course myself. How is it fun if it's not shared right? Owh and I'll also give my 10% and help the poor. Whatever I give I recieve fourfold. Or so I'm told.
8. Dream job?
On an island somewhere with someone with me to keep me company, writing a novel with an amazing plot that is based mainly on my life thus far.
9. List 3 good things bout the person who tagged you.
Person 1: Outspoken. Reliable. Spontaneous.
Person 2: Talkative. Outgoing. Active.
10. If you only had one wish what would it be?
I would wish for more wishes!!! And if I can't do that....I'll wish for someone who wants and needs me as much as I need him. Lol. I know, shallow.
11. If you could rewind time, would you?
I might, once in a while to relive the best times of my life.
12. What's your ambition?
To be successful, and to lead a happy full life.
13. If you can teleport once, where would you go?
The moon, I'll be the first woman on the moon. And then I'll worry about getting back later.
14. What do you think is the most important in your life?
People.
15. If you could undo one mistake in the past, what would you do?
I would be more careful, and not as naive.
16. If you had a chance what part of your character would you change?
My tendency to worry too much and the whining that comes with it.
17. What music have you been listening to lately?
A lot of oldies.
18. What is the one thing you cannot do but wish you could?
I wish I could control my emotions.
19. What is your dream at this vey second?
That I can go out and shoot the chickens...
20. What type of people annoy you?
People who don't keep their promises and think that they're above everyone else.
Foretell and Forthtell
I dun remember the difference of foretell and forthtell. I remember learning it once...but i cannot remember. How sad and retarded. Anyway since my body refuses to go to sleep, I'm going to answer a quiz that I've answered before, but who knows, things could have changed since then.
1. Put your music player on shuffle.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to every question.
4. With the answers, comment on how it relates to the question.
1. How am I feeling today?
Sailing - Hmmm, well I guess if I could sail in a Trajet then yes I sailed from Penang to KL to Kuantan
2. Will I get far in life?
Everything I can't Have - I guess not seeing as how I want things I simply cannot have
3. How do my friends see me?
On Top Of You - Okay...
4. Will I get married?
The Way You Look Tonight - Yes I will...in a torn t-shirt and without shorts
5. What is my best friends theme song?
I'll Be There For You - Doesn't get truer than that, I can always count on them
6. What was high school like?
Hot - Actually I beg to differ. High school was about as hot as the North Pole
7. What's happening this weekend?
Mad Season - I don't know how things can get mad in Kuantan but I'll take it either way
8. How can I get ahead in life?
No Promises - Total truth. Never promise anyone anything.
9. How is my life going?
Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely - Haha...my iPod is psychic.
10. What is the story of my life?
Don't Bother - I'll pick myself up when I fall, so don't bother Ill be fine
11. How does the world see me?
I've Got The World On A String - It may seem that way sometimes
12. What song will they play at my funeral?
Some Day My Prince Will Come - I told you I'm going to die a spinster.
13. What's the best thing bout my friends?
Evil Deeds - lol
14. How can I make myself happy again?
I Don't Want You Now - If only
15. Do people secretly lust for me?
Somebody Needs You - awesome
16. What should I do in life?
20 Hour Drive - Somehow I DONT THINK SO!!! Geela...
17. Will I ever have my own children?
Mess Around - It seems inevitable
18. What will I strip to?
Mission Impossible Theme Song - LOL!!!
19. What is my deep dark secret?
Never Will I Break - ..hmm, that means I'm not telling
20. What is my enemy's theme song?
Bent - She is totally bent I tell you
21. What is my personality like?
Your Guardian Angel - Awww, I knew it -.-
22. What song will be played at my wedding?
Rock You Like A Hurricane - No comment?
...
1. Put your music player on shuffle.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to every question.
4. With the answers, comment on how it relates to the question.
1. How am I feeling today?
Sailing - Hmmm, well I guess if I could sail in a Trajet then yes I sailed from Penang to KL to Kuantan
2. Will I get far in life?
Everything I can't Have - I guess not seeing as how I want things I simply cannot have
3. How do my friends see me?
On Top Of You - Okay...
4. Will I get married?
The Way You Look Tonight - Yes I will...in a torn t-shirt and without shorts
5. What is my best friends theme song?
I'll Be There For You - Doesn't get truer than that, I can always count on them
6. What was high school like?
Hot - Actually I beg to differ. High school was about as hot as the North Pole
7. What's happening this weekend?
Mad Season - I don't know how things can get mad in Kuantan but I'll take it either way
8. How can I get ahead in life?
No Promises - Total truth. Never promise anyone anything.
9. How is my life going?
Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely - Haha...my iPod is psychic.
10. What is the story of my life?
Don't Bother - I'll pick myself up when I fall, so don't bother Ill be fine
11. How does the world see me?
I've Got The World On A String - It may seem that way sometimes
12. What song will they play at my funeral?
Some Day My Prince Will Come - I told you I'm going to die a spinster.
13. What's the best thing bout my friends?
Evil Deeds - lol
14. How can I make myself happy again?
I Don't Want You Now - If only
15. Do people secretly lust for me?
Somebody Needs You - awesome
16. What should I do in life?
20 Hour Drive - Somehow I DONT THINK SO!!! Geela...
17. Will I ever have my own children?
Mess Around - It seems inevitable
18. What will I strip to?
Mission Impossible Theme Song - LOL!!!
19. What is my deep dark secret?
Never Will I Break - ..hmm, that means I'm not telling
20. What is my enemy's theme song?
Bent - She is totally bent I tell you
21. What is my personality like?
Your Guardian Angel - Awww, I knew it -.-
22. What song will be played at my wedding?
Rock You Like A Hurricane - No comment?
...
Thursday, July 10
It's all about the roots
I am currently in Kuantan. After much persuasion on my parents part I am here. Why so much persuasion needed? Cuz I hate travelling....seriously. I'm one of the worst travellers ever. i get car sick, I wanna rn out of the car and back home all the time, I dun like spending hours doing nothing. So yea, i dun like travelling.
And if I dun like travellin why have I spent the last week on the road away from home!!! sigh
Anyway not important. I officially start work on the 15th. After driving many people mad with my fretting. I'm actually looking forward to it, something to occupy my time. Hah and I get to hang out with Pey June all day. So fun!
And I think that when I travel i eat more!!! I think I've put on weight...sigh...useless. Got to go exercise. (Of course I say that but I wun cuz I'm me and me means being lazy)
Anyway, hopefully we can go eat Italianies this week. After much of Sukis waiting and planning. Especially since we agree that we're all growing apart. Need to see them to know that I need them. Does that make sense?
And theres ntg on tv rite now. Die. Boring.
Sigh I guess I'm going to sleep then. In my old bed. At least some things never change.
And if I dun like travellin why have I spent the last week on the road away from home!!! sigh
Anyway not important. I officially start work on the 15th. After driving many people mad with my fretting. I'm actually looking forward to it, something to occupy my time. Hah and I get to hang out with Pey June all day. So fun!
And I think that when I travel i eat more!!! I think I've put on weight...sigh...useless. Got to go exercise. (Of course I say that but I wun cuz I'm me and me means being lazy)
Anyway, hopefully we can go eat Italianies this week. After much of Sukis waiting and planning. Especially since we agree that we're all growing apart. Need to see them to know that I need them. Does that make sense?
And theres ntg on tv rite now. Die. Boring.
Sigh I guess I'm going to sleep then. In my old bed. At least some things never change.
Tuesday, July 8
Mindless Ramblings....
Why do I get panic attacks at the most random times?
I have yet to close a deal with anyone regarding any room which I will eventually stay in. (I noe people are tired about hearing me bitch about finding a room)
But it's hard.
Also it suddenly hit me that I'll be staying alone. Technically. Housemates don't count cuz I don't know them! And I do not know how to wash my clothes, much less iron them. If I attempt to, I have attempted to, I take hours on end. I also do not know how to cook. What am I going to live on? Bread and butter? Probably...
And I'll be ALONE!!!
I think I have a phobia about being alone. Really, I need people around me.
I'm afraid that when i go to uni people are going to slowly forget me. And instead of keeping in touch I'll just drift further and further away until one day I'll no longer remember them. And they won't remember me.
What if I fail to understand what I'm being taught? What if I turn out to be really really dumb? And I drop out after the first semester and end up working in sum hell hole I hate and despise?
What if I dislike my lecturers? What if I dislike my peers? What if my peers dislike ME?!
What if...what if...what if....
(sigh)
I need to be able to look back and smile. I need to be able to tell myself that I had fun but it didn't last. I need to be able to not cut ties.
Ugh, that's the hard part. I can feel myself going to. I keep pulling myself away from the edge, before I take the plunge I know I'm going to regret. But no matter how many times I tell myself not to mess with things, that things are fine the way they are, I find myself drawn back to the same edge. Just waiting for the courage to do it.
But I can't do it can I? I'll hurt myself. And I'll hurt other people. And what's the use of that? What can I possibly gain from making myself and the people I care about suffer?
When I think about it, I know I don't want to. I think I might feel a bit better if I do...but will I really? In the end all I'm going to achieve is an absence in my life. A hole that might never be filled, but at least it's not filled with something bad right? I'm going back and forth here, looking at the pros and the cons and I cannot understand. I don't know what my mind is trying to tell me.
If I do it...I lose my friend.
If I do it...I'll regret it.
I don't wanna regret it. I don't wanna do sumthing stupid that can ruin my life as I know it. But then again...why do I keep crawling back to the edge...?
I have got to stop thinking so much. Or find a better outlet for useless random thoughts.
I have yet to close a deal with anyone regarding any room which I will eventually stay in. (I noe people are tired about hearing me bitch about finding a room)
But it's hard.
Also it suddenly hit me that I'll be staying alone. Technically. Housemates don't count cuz I don't know them! And I do not know how to wash my clothes, much less iron them. If I attempt to, I have attempted to, I take hours on end. I also do not know how to cook. What am I going to live on? Bread and butter? Probably...
And I'll be ALONE!!!
I think I have a phobia about being alone. Really, I need people around me.
I'm afraid that when i go to uni people are going to slowly forget me. And instead of keeping in touch I'll just drift further and further away until one day I'll no longer remember them. And they won't remember me.
What if I fail to understand what I'm being taught? What if I turn out to be really really dumb? And I drop out after the first semester and end up working in sum hell hole I hate and despise?
What if I dislike my lecturers? What if I dislike my peers? What if my peers dislike ME?!
What if...what if...what if....
(sigh)
I need to be able to look back and smile. I need to be able to tell myself that I had fun but it didn't last. I need to be able to not cut ties.
Ugh, that's the hard part. I can feel myself going to. I keep pulling myself away from the edge, before I take the plunge I know I'm going to regret. But no matter how many times I tell myself not to mess with things, that things are fine the way they are, I find myself drawn back to the same edge. Just waiting for the courage to do it.
But I can't do it can I? I'll hurt myself. And I'll hurt other people. And what's the use of that? What can I possibly gain from making myself and the people I care about suffer?
When I think about it, I know I don't want to. I think I might feel a bit better if I do...but will I really? In the end all I'm going to achieve is an absence in my life. A hole that might never be filled, but at least it's not filled with something bad right? I'm going back and forth here, looking at the pros and the cons and I cannot understand. I don't know what my mind is trying to tell me.
If I do it...I lose my friend.
If I do it...I'll regret it.
I don't wanna regret it. I don't wanna do sumthing stupid that can ruin my life as I know it. But then again...why do I keep crawling back to the edge...?
I have got to stop thinking so much. Or find a better outlet for useless random thoughts.
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