General Conference October 2013

General Conference at out house is a time for forts and quiet activities.  I have found that I focus better for 8 hours of church over two days if my hands are busy.  This year I volunteered to help with Festival of Trees (a fundraiser for Primary Children's Medical Center).  So, I spent most of the two days working on craft projects to be sold in the gift shop.  Luckily I had found tons of past projects that I hadn't finished or that people hadn't paid me for, so I was able to use all of those and buy very little to add to my collection.  :)  Corry worked on his puzzle and Fuzzy helped me some of the time.  

It was a beautiful two days.  My favorite talk though came from Saturday when Elder Holland spoke on depression.  I loved it because he acknowledged that in the past, he had struggled and that it was ok.   I think my favorite quote was this one…

"Believe in miracles. I have seen so many of them come when every other indication would say that hope was lost. Hope is never lost. If those miracles do not come soon or fully or seemingly at all, remember the Savior’s own anguished example: if the bitter cup does not pass, drink it and be strong, trusting in happier days ahead."

To read the whole talk, go here.

Anyway, I love conference.  I love how it makes me feel and how it helps me to want to do better.  To watch or listen to all the talks, click here.  I like to download them to my iPod and listen to them while I drive or exercise.

Catch Up

I have a lot of blogging to catch up on, both writing my own and reading my friend's blogs!  My computer crashed two months ago because of a faulty hard drive (I had bought a new one in March).  Then I couldn't access my pictures or files for awhile, then once all that was working again, now I can't print anything!  It has been a bit frustrating and eye opening to how much I rely on all that.  Thankfully I have a fantastic neighbor that has been helping solve the problems, and his wife is amazing and keeps printing things out for me that I need!  At least the pictures are back on, that would have made me so sad to loose all those pictures!

I wish I just got on here and blogged everyday, with or without pictures, but I rarely do it.  The last few months have been very full.  There have been highs and lows and just normal days.  Somehow I feel like life is getting a bit harder.  That the trials and issues my children are facing are getting more difficult and serious.

The hardest thing right now has been watching some of my kids feel like they don't fit in anywhere, including at home.  That breaks my heart.  I want my home to be a place that no matter what goes on around my children in the world, they can always come home and feel loved.  I felt like a complete failure when one of my kids told me that the other night.  All my best efforts to talk to them, send them messages, take them places, do things for them, do things with them, teach them responsibility and all the other things I try every day to do, either I am not doing, or they are not seeing what I do.

I have one child that keeps doing poorly in school, not because it is too hard, but because they are not turning in assignments or not working hard.  I know it is not too hard for them because I see the difference when I get after them versus when I don't.  I just want them to be successful!

Add to that Corry has been gone a ton, so I feel like I am doing a lot of the parenting on my own.

I read this article the other day that just had me unnerved.  It had me questioning my beliefs just a bit.  I felt so strongly the day after I read it that I needed to go to the temple.  So I did and I was able to sit and just read my scriptures for a long time.  This scripture really stood out to me in Ether 4:15,  "Behold, when ye shall rend that veil of unbelief which doth cause you to remain in your awful state of wickedness, and hardness of heart, and blindness of mind, then shall the great and marvelous things which have been hid up from the foundation of the world from you—yea, when ye shall call upon the Father in my name, with a broken heart and a contrite spirit, then shall ye know that the Father hath remembered the covenant which he made unto your fathers, O house of Israel." I probably read that verse 20 times that day.  I felt like I had a veil of unbelief and it was awful. Then as I sat there in that beautiful place and let go of that unbelief, I felt like my Father remembered me.  It was such a beautiful experience. 

Yesterday a friend of mine posted this on Facebook and I felt that same feeling of being watched over.  This was exactly the quote I needed to share with a few of my children.  “We live in a day when the adversary stresses on every hand the philosophy of instant gratification. We seem to demand instant everything, including instant solutions to our problems. . .It was meant to be that life would be a challenge. To suffer some anxiety, some depression, some disappointment, even some failure is normal.” ― Boyd K. Packer.  I loved this for my children who were struggling, but the more I thought about it through the day, the more I knew I needed it for me too.  

Then this morning I had a chance to visit with a few of my friends and we were able to talk about our struggles as moms and guess what - WE ALL FEEL THE SAME WAY!!!  That was the thing I loved about this quote form Elder Packer is that sometimes I feel like I am messed up because I am struggling with something.  Then I read that and remembered that all these things are part of life.  For everyone.  

Ah, life is good.  It is hard sometimes, but life is good.  The Lord is good.  He looks out for us and helps us when we ask and listen.