Tears

Tears. There are tear of happiness, touch, disappointment, angry, etc. But tear for today is tear of sadness. Yea, I am sad. Well you can say "again???", but I am sad. The truth that you know clearly is not hurting until you heard it from someone else. The truth that have been bothering and upsetting you for years. The words are hurting. tearing the heart, and the soul. Tears. only if the tears can heal the wound. Only if the tears can change the fact. Only if...

Surprise!

Second day of exam has just over. left the classroom with weary eyes, for the results of studying at the very last minute before exam) and came back with with anger and upset. Matters related to the dormitory are getting worse. Relationship between us and the Japanese are stiff now(well,may be that is my own point of view). complaints and claims are heard often. And I found myself to be very easily effected by others opinion or subjective views. I know I am unhappy about all those craps, but,a big BUT, I cant tell or argue on why I feel unfair about them. And now, there is a big decision to make again. decision that will affect the relationship between Japanese and foreigners in TNCT, now and in the future. ''Decide for yourself but not for others'',said my honeys. but sometimes, we just cant do whatever we want to. Well, I am too tired now to think about this. So to get rid of those upset thoughts from my head, hehehehehe, wanna tell you about my happening yesterday. No guessing is needed. it is about us again. hehehe

Remember the gift I mentioned that I was looking forward in the previous post?(Nah, see here in case you didnt see hehe=) and now... guess what???? I GOT HIS PRESENT for our anniversary FINALLY!!!! taa-daa!!!!!

Well,Okay, this is how it looked like when I noticed about it in my post box.XD first with curiosity I walked toward the post box, then I saw the very very familiar hand writing. At that moment, I was like,''OMG, is it him??'' And yeah, It was from him!! I was too happy that I was lost on whether to unwrap it in front of my post box where everyone might see my silly but excited face, or open it slowly in my room, enjoying the sweetness of the gift. XD Well, I was able to calm down and be rational, I decided to open it in my room.. hehe. but I was hopping up the staircase with the excitement that couldn't help showing up on my face. unwrapping the parcel( so many layers of plastic bags covered on) and I got this!!

picture he made with his precious time(on drama -.-')

hehehehhe.. He knows I like Sesame Street! The surprise made my day again. I guess this is the merit of being in a long distance relationship. =) Well,if you are not, you can do so by sending gift to your partners house too, XD HAve a good day! till then..... jya ne.. =)

分叉路口

不知不觉，又踏入了年尾。
上个月才为研究室而烦恼了很久
现在又是做决定的时候了。
人生，真的只有选择与决定吗？

最近的我很忧郁。
或许应该说，我一直都很忧郁。
其实有发现自己的部落格都是记载着我的心情，
都是在低落时写下的心情。
不喜欢这样，
但是我就是在不开心的时候才会想写部落格。
开心的事，难分享。
可能因为伤心的时间总是长过开心的时间吧。

又来到新的分叉路口,
又是做决定的时候。
心中其实有了一个决定，
但是没有信心能做到，
所以都说我还没决定。

站在这个分叉路口，
我不知所挫。
万事俱备，
只欠一个信念。

是时候证明自己能够走多远了。

Homesick

I think I miss my home.Not sure but I think I am missing them more and more.
I thought I wont miss them and have once told my senior that I will be okay for not going back home next spring and summer holiday, I said I would be fine. told the same thing too to my family before I left home last summer.
But I am missing home right now. just 3 months after I left them.

sour eyes with smile while talking about my dad.
cried after seeing my mom crying over the screen.
Happy when I got my sister posted on my wall saying she miss me badly.
Laughed like I've never laughed before when brother told me about his good news.

I am so sentimental I know, That most of my post here are about my feelings.
But I can write only when I am emo.


I am into so many things these days.
Too many things on my mind that I am so tired of thinking,
and I am lost in doing things that I suppose to do.
I doubt about many things.

3rd Anniversary

owh yea, this post should be posted on 31st October, but..hm.. I have been busy lately(excuse)LOL.


everything in last OCtober was not in good timing. We didnt celebrate our anniversary this year. but we made something for each other ans send it via post.( he said he made something ugly for me.. cant wait to get them. heheh)



Three years, it's neither long nor short. Still remembered myself saying that I wont fall for him, but finally, it turned into reality.
I have been making an album of us, all handmade, and found it a good way to release stress. because I feel happy whenever i make it.



Happy Anniversary to my love one.. <3

filled with gloom

It is another emotional day.
I am in a gloomy mood while writing this post.

I dislike being ignored.
I dislike being neglected.
I dislike being brought into trouble that wasn't mine.
I dislike being ordered by an unsystematic person.
I islike being doubted.
I dislike everything when I am upset,
dislike everything but hate myself the most.

I laughed, I smiled, I joked, I enjoyed,
without my true soul.
I do,I learnt, I remember, I think,
without my brain.
I decided, I challenged, I tried,
without determination.

oh,what a bad day.
should I sleep early today,
get rid of everything that occupying my mind now,
hoping for a better tomorrow.
well, tomorrow wouldn't be a better one if I continued to be like this.


Till then.

窗外

寒冷的早晨，
沉闷的讲解，
被窗外传来的机械声引起注意。

被割下的校园的杂草，
一堆堆的堆在池塘周围。
浓郁的叶子的味道，
让我目不转睛的看着收拾杂草的Aunty uncle们。
看着看着，
想着想着，
突然这种想法出现了。

其实我以后成为路边打扫的杂工也不错嘛。
空气清新，
虽然会辛苦点，
但是不必用脑，不就是最好的嘛。

最近用太多脑，
用在多余的顾虑。
还有不必要的担忧。
好废。

下个星期，
就是下个星期的今天，
我明年的一年，
将会被决定。

没有期望很多，
只是期待7天后，
接下去的日子。

好期待。

ps:文章有点怪，
别见怪。=）

生病了

生病了。 在日本的第二年，终于生病了。 大家应该很奇怪为什么我说‘终于'吧。 他们说，日本人的生活太干净，使他们的自然免疫力退化，容易生病。 在日本的第一年，看见日本人个个都穿口罩。 特别是在春，秋和冬天。 问了身边的人，才知道原因。 要不是因为花粉症，就是伤风感冒。 从马来西亚的我，身体比较好吧。 但是，第二年了，应该是习惯了日本的空气，食物和生活环境吧》》生病了。 有Lydia 的照顾，太好了。 当然这个时候会想念某些人。 =.='' 上课，一位我非常仰慕的老师关心我， 有点受宠若惊。 开心=）

Old Friend ; Best Friend

It was a wonderful day having my best friend with me the whole day. It was 11 in the morning and her car parked in front of my house, waiting for me. Imagine a big sized girl, grabbing her blue hand bag, running and leaping towards the silver car. I was too happy to see her again! nevertheless. I am going shopping. hehehe She is pretty, gorgeous as usual but always make people feel fresh every time meeting her. She is one of the girl who inspires me. Has tomyam cintan Mee for our lunch before heading to Queensbay Mall in Penang The mall was not crowded as I found last few times when I came, despite it was a Saturday. spent four hours in a mall, but only walked in to 4 boutiques. which means we spent one hours averagely in one shop. hahahha. Man,see.. this is when girls meet shopping. XD didnt buy much thing but very lucky, I bought a pair of suits that I have been searching since last year.heheh.. We walked, we shopped, we chatted. The time flies. I can say we didnt stop chatting all the way long. How great I hope I can chat with a friend like this too in Japan. But I guess it is impossible. huhuhu, my japanese speaking skill is getting poorer and poorer. =( came back to Bedong at 7pm and we decided to go for movie again later on. We are watching The Smurfs!!!!! I wanted to watch soooooo badly but everytime I missed the chance. and now, it was time!! somemore watching with my best friend. hehehe.. the little blue buddies. hehe.. I 'smurf' smurfs 'Smurfly'!!!!!

Brief Update..with weary eyes

have not updated my blog for a month. I always wanted to,
but I always had excuses on not doing it.
Sometimes, I am tired,
Sometimes, I wanted to watch movies,
Sometimes, I wanted to sleep earlier but ended up surfing around.
Sometimes, I wanted to go hanging out with friends.

Have a lot of things to write down, but not knowing where to start, I gave up.
Not a professional blogger, nevermind. haha XD
I added nuffnang into my blog and it took me a night time to know more about it.

Going very well with boyfriend recently. His calls, his way of teasing and grumping towards me ( in his very special way), and flirting always make me smile. well, this is what couples will do right?=)

just came back from a nice trip with my parents 2 hours ago. Meeting my sister on the way back home, not know why, I feel great and warm to be with her, in her room. I miss her. I know she surely miss me more than I do, she is so fragile that I want to be with her most of the time, but in fact, she mentally protects me the most. sisters, the complicated but wonderful relationship.=)

And tomorrow!! yeah TOMORROW!! I am going to Penang with my best friend, Qi!!!!!!! Shopping, not needed to be explained, the greatest entertainment for girls!! ant wait for tomorrow.. hehehhehe.=P

Well, a bried update for now.gotta go to bed,so that I can be prettier for tomorrow's outing. eheheh.. Wil update soon. I promise guys!! XD
till then..Good night...

电车上的1个小时

从实习回来路途，都得坐1个小时左右的电车。
那是漫长的时间，也是我唯一会专心在下载了平时却不用的applications。
我的实习排档，开口闭口就是介绍我去旅行，而且都是谈吃的。刚开始是一星期见一次，就是说一星期只听一次，刚开始还蛮有兴趣听他的介绍，但是，现在天天都得听，开始觉得他很烦，就没有别的话题吗觉得烦了，敷衍了他，就埋头在电话里，不管了。还好他不是KY（不识趣），总算停下来了。

那一个小时路程，我开始看了下载下来的小说，是张小娴的作品。所以今天特别有感觉用话文写部落格。好久没看小说了，原来华语还是我最熟悉的。这几年，为了加强自己的英语，都是在看英语新闻，读英语故事书，写英语留言。还记得上个月为了预定台北的一间客房，对方应该是看我有中文名字，所以用华语寄了一封电邮来。我看得懂，但是回信却难倒了我，向运洁‘求问’。身边的人知道我会4，5个语言，觉得我很厉害。可是，事实不是那么好。看来我得加把劲，学好现在都是‘半桶水’的语言了。华语，英语，马来语，日语，还有我应该是每有资格说我会的淡米尔语。可是真的好想再学会淡米尔语，不到半桶也无所谓，至少我能明白一些些。=）

一边看小说，也一边与前辈同简讯。谈起了那个人的事。前辈只是轻轻问过，可是话题就留在头脑，不能离开。其实这件事是我这两年来最不想要去想的事，但是没得避免。就算是能避免的也免了，到最后是变成一个‘畏’字。简讯的其中一封，虽然会担心被当事人发现，但是内心是很想被他看见。这是一种变态吗？哈哈。不管了，为了逃避，我忍耐了一年多，难道这三年都不得不免吗？有时候真的觉得好难受。没关系啦，陈彩馨是能忍的。


没写部落各的这几个月，发生了很多很多事情。不需要指望我会写出来，因为我是名副其实的善忘，忘了发生了什么事。当然还会记得被社会关注的事，就好像马来西亚的黄色示威运动。对了，这几天常有余震，有点担心。专家预测这30年在日本会有一次大地震，4个月前是在福岛，而这将会是在东京附近。与上次的不同，将会是，伤害力更强的垂直式地震。

日本现在是夏天，可是这3个星期的气温是比春天还低。那天台风袭击日本，导致整个月就好像是6月的梅雨，雨下个不停。那天的3天2夜箱根之旅，一般是因为这种天气而泡汤了。

后天就去台湾了，台湾一个星期，在到新加坡，才回家。
不知道爸妈最近怎样了，好久没打电话回家了。

I miss my family

I miss my mama, my papa, my lovely da jie and two brothers...T.T

I miss my sister and mama the most! may be I heard their voices three days ago.
It was my mom's birthday two days ago.
I couldnt be there. I wanna ctalk and laugh with them.
I dreamed about my sister marrying her boyfriend last night.
It was too sweet that i didnt want to wake up from my dream. (as if i can control) haha.

wanna go shopping with my da jie(sister),
wanna go travel with my best friend,Feng qi.
Wanna teased by jia liang.
wanna stand beside my tall tall brother jia dong.

arghhh....
I wan see them!!...

a girl(lady)'s emotion

I was to start writing this post by deciding a title and I got stuck. A girl? or a lady or WOMAN?
Oh no!!!! I am no longer a girl,You see? I am 21! 21 years old, an adult huh..
well, keep it aside, dont mind. -.-'

Days have been occupied by assignments, reports and thought(about nothing? o.0). And time passes too fast that I just came to realized that I havent thought about which laboratory to enter and which university to choose. You might think it's still half year time ahead but it's unexpectedly fast.
Anyway, what matter the most is my 4th year's academic results if I wish to get recommendation from school. BUt wait! I am still struggling on my reports and not yet started any revision!! So envy with my friends that can start their revisions already =(
well, may be i am giving myself pressure because results matters this time.
as the Japanese say: なんとかなるよ。or chinese's 船到桥头自然直.. hahaha. i should think positively. when one door is closed, another door will be opened.
Argh, why so many aphorism?? crazy..

it was the premenstrual period i think, I was under depression,a very very serious one. for two weeks, everything didnt seem to go well, everything seemed difficult, everyone with any action irritates me. and after all, my boyfriend became the biggest victim again. XD
cold war started off, neither calls nor messages...
hohoho. but shouldnt him understand me?? XD haha. its hormne unbalance and it occurs one a month for normal girl(lady) ,hey!! now i blame it on the hormone.XD sory hormone, but you really bad lah!!!


good food always the best stress relief. I am in love with tofu now!! just found out that it is tasty ans easy to cook!!




pumpkin is my favorite too!!!

oppsss.. it is fish curry, malaysian style heh.. cooked using baba's curry powder=)
here is the pumpkin!


look nice and tasty right??? in fact they were!! hohohoh..

bought a home bakery appliance two days ago. it's too simple that you just have to measure the ingredients and put into the gadget!!! then you can get a loaf of breat or toast and even cake depends on what flavor or droppings you like!!!!
nah!!!


hehe...
till then!

menu 2

Finally, after a month, I made another japanese Dish. hehe..

see see.
first is the ひじき炒め(HIJIKI-Itame) a kind of sea weed I think.


second one.. no name for it. I cooked it with the experience cooking the previous one. hehe
another failure again. burned the pot. hahahah




so there is it.. hehe. I want to make white sauce baked rice. but I couldnt find the solidify cream. hmm

recently..

It has been 3 weeks since the school reopen. everything was still like last year.
I was worried and afraid at the beginning of the year as days back in last year was terrifying. Phobia with the new days coming to me.

however, it was still okay so far. two juniors entered my course.one from malaysia and one from indonesia. both are cute, cheerful and naughty girls. Days with them were happy and I feel like myself sticking to them more then they need me.=P
Lydia has gone,Subasni has left..sometimes, emptiness occupies me although two cute juniors are with me. It is still different with before.

So far, I have been in very good mood when I am with other people, especially my juniors and classmates,I found that smile can actually bring more luck for ourselves. When you smile, people smile.when you say hello, people say hi.I should have realized this one year ago, XD

last week was a brain racking day. Had to decide on which internship to go.
and with helpssssss from seniors, I decided! hehe..
still doubting if I can do it, but I decided to challenge myself one more time. you may say it doesnt matter much, but for me, it is another step leading me to my target of being better-me. hehehe


And about my japanese recipe, ohohoho. i know.. i missed two weeks cooking it. hehe..
I didnt forget! just that I am lazy to go shopping. and shopping can actually make me spend more..
wait for my next entry!!

夜桜

It was two days ago when I was invited by a lecturer of mine to go for Sakura-Night-Seeing.
Was surprised and happy that I got invited. Had been lookin forward for today.

And so, here we go after waiting 30 minutes for him to finish hi stuff in laboratory.
He is fame with his humor. Every sentence from his mouth is a joke.
from 6.30pm to 9pm. They chit-chatted,and I listened. I paid full attention to their conversation.I could understand some.
and it got tiring when it continued for hours.

Three of them talked and laughed. I could only listen but couldnt understand.
so upset and embarrassing to face a group of people joking by themselves while you dont understand most of the content. fake smile and blank stare was the only things I could do. haiz.
I care how people think of myself, i think most of us do. I have been staying and interacting woth Japanese for one year, and yet I couldnt speak fluent Japanese and understand 100%.
Are you having the same difficulty as mine too. Please say yes, at least it comforts me a little.

argh.. i am so depressed now.
And in situation like this, I need him the most.I could hear his word saying 'one needs to sacrifice to get what he or she wants'

sacrifice huh.
i hate i hate i hate thiss!!!!!!!!!

Mastering Japanese food.first two recipes^^

I came out with this idea on mastering the japanese food about a month ago after trying out sewing, origami and book reading. hohoho.
Firstly, you know for Chinese, 'food' is everything.It becomes a topic whenever you go to a new place,i believe =）
Friends and family asked me if I can cook any Japanese food, and of course my answer was a NO. haha.. so I bought a recipe book for beginner, and decided to cook one or two dishes every weekend. I have two years more, two books in two years is possible I guess.

Secondly, My boyfriend cooks better than me even though he had never cooked before. In fact I prepared my family's 3 meals since I was a standard 6 girl.My cooking isn't that bad after all,just that they are 'unlookable'


So these are the two dishes tried out last Sunday.taddaa~~
this is from my own hands..^^　pimento ketchup pork slices.

and this is what it should look like... not bad huh? =)


but actually for the ketchup sauce, I should add some chili sauce, I didnt have=( used chili paste intead.hoho


another one!!!! radish cooked in soy sauce


it looks like this in the recipe


this one was a failure actually. theradish shoudln't be in this size nor shape. It should be a round one with crossing cut at the centre, but i cut it of crossly into four parts. japanese understanding failure was the reason! ahah
and I put too much ofstarch powder which made the soup too sticky. but the taste wasnt bad, because I used tsuyu, japanese'soup made from fish, which makes eveything tastes good.XD


anyway, it was a good start for me XD. gambare Tang Chye Sin =))

*...*

it has been just one month I didn't update my blog. But a lot of things happened in this short time,especially the predicted but unbelievable tragedy that happened to the Land of the Rising Sun.
A 8.9l gratitude earthquake had hit Japan,causing tsunami which swept away hundred thousand people's lives and damaged Fukushima Daiichi Nuclear Power Plant. Chaos happened in the neighboring countries due to the worrying towards the possible leaking of radiation.

Since then, most of the customers who entered my dad's shop asked me the same questionsssss again!!
'Jepun tsunami lo, u mau balik Jepun lagi ar?' or
'tempat u belajak kat mane? tak kena tsunamii ar?' or
'tak yah balik la, radiation lo, balik buat apa?'
these were the most frequent asked questions. there are more questions that I cant tell all.

people listen, read and tell about the tragedy. mom and dad and relatives started to worry about my returning to japan. There was even a suggestion from a friend to stop studying in Japan but start all over again in local Universities or colleges. and my respone to this suggestion was---Walao, 太夸张了啦！！ sorry for using different languages but I want to express it in a more accurate way. forgive me=)
Parents were worried and they wanted me to postpone my flight to Japan. I thought that postponing one week wouldnt change anything if the radiation was really there. I would got affected by the radiation too. but to comfort my worried papa and mama, I decided to postpone.
And thus I reached Japan on 4th April instead of 31st March.

We said goodbye on 3rd April evening. It was really really hard to say goodbye. I didnt feel reluctant, not until I stood beside my mom,wanted to give a hug and say goodbye.
but... but.. hehe.. tears dropped before I realized. Mom refused to hug hug and she cried too. what an embarrassing phenomenon!! lucky that there wasnt any customer in shop.hehehe
Papa seeing me off until I got into car. His eyes was red, and it was my first time seeing this.
couldnt control, tears dropped rapidly,non stop. aduhai...


my brothers are the cutest persons in the world!!! i dont know how to describe the day they said goodbye to me. It was just, sweet....<3
I miss them already.

being home

Hai hai!! I am back to Malaysia!!!! well, it isn't really an excited thing though.
Erm, It was almost two weeks ago since I reached home. too busy and lazy to update =P.
I should enjoy my days first right? hhe

It was my first time returning to Malaysia from overboard, and I have been waiting for the day(25th Feb 2011). Things happened which my home returning became an unhappy one.
First, I left the valentine's gift for him in the fridge of my dormitory in Japan. It was such a shame that I felt so sad about that.
second, we quarreled in the airport which brought us into a cold war for hours in the airport and plane.And I almost missed the plane.( I boarded 5minutes before the flight time)
third, I just realised that I bought too few souvenirs for my friends and family. I need more!But my luggage as overweight already!


If someone asked me the first thing I felt for this home returning, I would say, HOT!!!!
Malaysia is really hot. I could feel the heat once I stepped onto the exit gate of the plane.
people around us weren't just fair,but yellow and dark. words on the sign boards wasn't english or Jpanese but Malay was the main language.


Back to home, days are not special. Days are just like before. I help in my Dad's grocery shop. Shouting and asking my parents for the prices of goods,chatting and joking with the customers.
AH,, the special one is this---Avoiding my parents friends. 三姑六婆
I avoid because I dont like explaining about life in Japan and their questions dont change.
oo. You are the one go to Japan ar? how's Japan? Japan nice ho? You stay in hokkaido or tokyo? you get used to their food ?(As if Japanese only eat Sushi)
Come on.. Change the topic. ishhhh..
I run whenever I see their cars approaching my dad's shop.hehe..

My parents have bought a new house near to my current house. mom is busy with the renovation of the house. We children dreamed for the home showed in TV but mom has her own budget and she said she is satisfied with a normal and simple house. hmm. nvm lo, We build our own dream house in the future and let her stay with us. ^^
earn money!!!!

met up with my best friend in a japanese restaurant. Wasnt bad^^
the outing was a nice and comfortable one as I only listen to her story. I wanted to share my storied in Japan too, but the memories in Japan just lost and blank in my head.

I think I really have a memory lost problem. I cant remember things well. its like, when I am in Japan, I barely remember how Malaysia is. AND now i am in Malaysia, I merely remember what I feel in Japan. Oh no.... I want to tell my stories to my grandchildren next time but now I am worrying if I could tell my child in the nearer future.. XD

the day after tomorrow will be myone week trip to sarawak, KL and Kampar!!!

Till then^^

Two weeks before going back home

It’s 13 days until I go back to my sweet home, but I have to endure with my exam first before I can start packing my luggage, and this is the hardest part when you are waiting for the time to come, but more time on preparing and studying at the very last minute for the exam.
I luckily had two extra public holidays. But, still, I spent the time unwisely. I stay awake till the midnight talking to my bf, facebook-ing, Tumblr-ing, taking picture of the first snow in my place. Then woke u late in the morning, Again, spent my whole day with the books on my table writing and solving without my heart. Newly bought camera kept seducing me to take the picture of snow. It is not nice to experience the first snow during the exam week. But, because of my senior, Subasni’s temptation to play in the snow, I didn’t miss the chance enjoying the snow. We couldn’t feel our fingers and toes. Freezing… but we still could move and play around larrr…and went to the Nepali food in neighbor village(?) with my classmates ..
Hey, come to think of it, it wasn’t a wate of time right? Haha.. great, no regret no regret.
Huuuuhhh.. outside is cold and my room is warm, but unventilated. It’s cold if I open the window or door. What should I do.XD
Writing craps here, don’t want to go back to my books. Dull and makes me more dizzy in this unventilated room. Argh.. I need Malaysia’s air.!



first snow flake i saw in my life time


happy valentine's day!

She is Subasni


I love this picture the most.<3

除夕夜

现在的几个小时前，
满满的读书心情
心情是不寻常的快乐

现在对着电脑
看着爸爸那着给我的红包
心里想的，
并不是我19 年来期待新年拿红包的心情，
而是告诉爸，我要的并不是红包！
这是爸第一次猜不到我的心吧。

我想要得
是六个人肩搭肩说新年快乐
是抱着爸爸的手臂
是全家围着没有空间的圆桌
是和大姐在房里试穿明天去婆婆家的新衣服
是在妈妈的房间帮她包红包
是四兄弟姐妹守夜玩扑克，输钱的会瓜瓜叫，赢钱的会哈哈笑

新年初一，
我总是会摆臭脸，因为爸妈很爱拖时间
因为不喜欢应酬亲戚，
而且得六人挤一两车

但是现在身在他乡
终于感受到那种幸福，是特别的
虽然和前辈，还有其他留学生
一起在中国料理
但是心里还是空虚的

最温馨的，
还是今早睡醒受到好友，芬荠的祝福与问候
绮，我还是喜欢枫绮。。。
谢谢你。love love

最后，
和大姐自拍
才把那心情回复回来


新年快乐！！！

My passion (?)

P/S: I am not upset while writing this ^-^

I always wish myself to be an outstanding or at least a better person than I am now.
erm,outstanding??
For this reason,I have been struggling and working hard on discovering myself-what my passion, my interest, my strength and my personality is.
I always ask,learn,remember(as I always forget^_^), ask myself and others for advice, plan my future, keep myself breast of news.....
I made myself read before I slept every night to improve my English,bought sewing kit to learn sewing, flours and recipe to learn cooking, took up a post in MSAJ despite all the fears and unconfidence...
I need to find thing that I am really really keen in, and do something with it, at least i can answer when someone ask about my hobby or how I spend my free time.

.... but sad to tell, i failed to find my passion. =.='
I thought about things that I feel good after doing it to know what my passion is.
I feel that I am the happiest person when watching Hindi movies, though the story line for most of the movies are almost the same, but I just cant move my eyes from the screen, tears of touching and laughing never absent while watching. And I cant say it is my passion,that I cant even remember the actors' names, update myself with new releasing movie. well, It might be my passion.owh.

Next, I like shopping, put on nice dress and clothes. Okay, you can say it is everyone's interest,erm,but let me put it in my like-list,pleaseee.^^
thank you.. hehe
I wish to have a huge wardrobe that heaped with clothes and dress, a lovely box with accessories, another wardrobe for shoes,and HIGH HEELSSSSSSSSS!!!! But that is impossible with no self-income, nice body line, and the height.lol!! This also can be a passion too right?

I enjoy taking and looking at photos. Nah, this one I improve in photographing. The last time I scolded for couldn't snap a nice photo was last year and now I am praised by some of my friends. of course I cant snap very good picture yet, but at least 'not bad' hehe..

Hmm.. what else??


oh ya, I like to listen to people.passion?? dont know*shrugging* XD


'U have to sacrifice to achieve anything you long for' is what he always tell me, his principle.

Happy New Year!!!(i know its late=0 )

I wanted to title this blog as 'New Year Resolution' but I could not stop myself from relating this title to my English Composition class, where my teacher asked us to write a looooonnnnggggg essay about what we wanted to achieve in this new year. Nooooooooooo!!!!!!!! I know we should set a target for our future but, please, not composition. =)
I couldn't think about other title, and so the lame title is decided. haha


New year celebration 2011 was different with past years. I spent my new year eve in a Internet Cafe ( Japanese call it Kisaten), sleeping in a narrow, small,uncomfortable cubicle, rolling myself into a moon shape. The worst one was that I lost the precious souvenir that represented 6 of us.

each of us would have taken each color. but i lost it. Guilty !!!! I am sorry girls!!

Nothing meant more than celebrating a speacial day with people I miss a lot.
Went to HArajuku with Xue Mey to meet up Angela and Si Gee. sudah lama tak jumpa lorrr. I missed them so much. While waiting for the two beauties, hanging around a big temple in Harajuku with Xue Mey. The Japanese clebrates their new year by visiting and praying in temples. A temporary Harajuku Station was set up because of the flow of people to the temple was too large. Some of them wearing traditional clothing.





People throwing coins into the area covered by white clothes in front of the main temple hall

traditional clothings,Kimono if I am not mistaken^^

writing my wishes on a wooden piece^^




haha dont laugh at my wishes! I meant it!

It had come to noon when the two beauties arrived(finally).too excited to meet them after a long time, we chatted near the exit of station. And I got a BIG, HUGE surprise!!!!! I met Krishna, my best friend, my special friend!!! We didn't make arrangement to meet each other, nor know where each other would be. But we met!!! I was so excited and surprised that I kept hitting on his arms. haha. too excited.. I dont usually hit people(>.<)



these pictures were taken in a Softbank store in harajuku, playing Ipad while waiting the iphones to be fully charged.
Four of us walking around harajuku but ended up with shopping alone. Si gee and I separated half way=.=... xue mey and Angela, having no interest in clothes shopping, sitting at Mc D. haha.

Xinyi met us up for lunch too^^ received her souvenir from Taiwan^^ I got a muffler, very furry ..
I left them earlier to meet Fu Wei, who was with his boyfriends shopping for fukubukuro at another place. We were heading to Osaka very soon after that^^

Ski trip 2010 (Naeba, Nigata)

so it was a ski trip organized by hong yao, my senior studying in the same kosen as Fu Wei,on 29th to 31st Dec 2010.
It was my first time dealing with the freezing cold weather, and of course, snowboarding.
I didnt look forward to it before going, however, I did enjoy the 3 days with my friends, and seniors,although there were only 5 seniors who came.
oh.. I miss them already..

erm.. lazy to elaborate, just write my feeling and conclusion(hehe)

I feel so thankful to Fu wei,Pei Loon for teaching me how to slide down from the steep hill of snow,using snowboard,Ah Chan sempai for lending me his cool and stunning snowboard(mine ws found broken, up at the top of the hill XD)
Thanks to Soon Kie,for being encouraging and companying me during the trip,Hong Yao, Minley and ming rong for guiding me.
erm, why I write as I had won a grand prize? haha.. but i really want to say thank you ma..

Fall and tumbling many many times, we found ourselves couldnt wake up the next morning. The body was in pain, tired arms, legs, shoulders, and BUTTOCKS!!!!!

cute leh? =)

my gang of snowborading. soon kie, keng yaw, pei loon^^

3 beauties in the snow!!haha

two pretty and lovely seniors^^ Kelly and Minley!

'pillow talk with pei loon, soon kie, Jun hao and hong yao. jun hao couldnt stand with the tiredness. imagine we stay awake all night long after the all day snowboarding and falling!!

photo taken in front of staying place

us^^
It was a fun trip I have had. Like to have a gathering like this, with friends, seniors and .er.Juniors??? haha..
argh.. the juniors re coming to Japan in 2 more months> I will be the senior, not the youngest junior in Japan anymore!
I dont wanT!!!!!