it's christmas and i'm stuck at home with a spoilt comp.

seems like i can't break the curse of a lonely christmas.

Week 5...
8 more weeks to combined arms phase
13 weeks to ex panzer strike
hope i can survive till then
good luck to the 2 octs at safti

sian sia cb
the recruit feeling of booking in is here to haunt again
bslc charlie still the best sia
fuck laaaaaaa zz.

Tank Leader

another chiong sua life, sigh. gotta adapt new place and new people again. this is like one of the worst spec vocation course. and rebel sucks, should have paid more to hear benny benassi.
21 weeks...

whatsup people.
there goes another 8 weeks. the 28 km was a bitch i swear. last week was spending doing nothing in camp. sleep and sleep and more sleep, wasting hell loads of money in canteen eating, keep losing in daidee and smoke till puke. haha another week of that and off i go to new camp.
sadly, got posted to some unknown vocation. armour engineer spec, wtf is that. god bless ahhhh. really envy those whom posted to mp but thats life la, you always get what you least expected.
boring fucccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkk.

the first step is always the hardest.
wonders hows life inside
hope i manage to survive bslc and mp come take me away LOL
ok bye world, wish me luck.

8 weeks to go!

fever and stomach flu during block leave, wooooo.

it sets me thinking,
why did things turn out this way.
6 years of friendship...
where were you when everyone's on my side?
people change, things change
i changed.

where did i go wrong i lost a friend somewhere along in the bitterness

Enjoying every bit of my block leave.
Bbq. Movie. Steamboat. Zirca. Town. Phuture. Rebel.
Goodluck to my fellow bros who just went in.

POP looo.

Confinement sucks.

3 more days...

16 km is killer.
My feet still hurts till now.
Wonders how to survive 24.
9.44 mins is so unreachable.

Last week and 3 days!

Turning Point is nice
Here comes xiong week
IPPT, SOC, 16 km route march
Gimme some strength for pull ups, swing trainer and the route march man.
Booking out on thurs!

2 weeks 3 days to go

Fucking hate this phase of life. I can forsee a lousier life after BMT. Fuck man.

3 weeks 3 days to go.

Sit Test, outfield again!
Today feels exceptionally emo. lawl.

8 weeks passed, 5 weeks to go.

So alone, so helpless. When you got nothing to fall back on and nobody's there to help you. Giving up is just an arm's length away but you can't because there's no other option left.
Every inch of your body is screaming at you to give up, scream back.

7 weeks down, 6 more to go.

The most feared week has arrived. Good luck to myself. Fancy getting sick during period like this. Hope I come back in one piece.
Public Enemies sucks.

6 weeks down, 7 more to go.

50 dead men walking is nice.
Had some beer yesterday night.
Wonders when can I get my $350 back.
And I'm booking in at 1 pm WTF.

5 weeks down, 8 more to go.

Obsessed. Supper. Monster Cue. Dome. Pasta Mania. Powerhouse.

4 weeks passed, 9 more to go.

Life's superb when book out. Great family and friends, endless flow of good food, what else can one ask for?

The mood now is fucking sian now i swear. This is like heaven man. Air-con, comfy bed, hot-water shower, television, singing k, movie, pool, fastfood and otot cigs.
Argh, fuck this shit la.

14 days of confinement is hell man. The fifteen minutes of meal time can seriously just kill me, LOL. But it's good la, in a way that it made me realise I had took too much things and people for granted. Showed me who are true and whos the fakeshit. Really thank you bros for helping me taking back some part of the money.
Feels good to have friends planning outings and taking off just to accompany you.
See you guys on friday night, if nothing goes wrong.

I realised that I'm the only one who can bring myself down, or pull myself up.

Sorry Mum and Dad. I know you are going for a surgery and you had to use your surgery money and pay for my debts. Sorry Dad that you had to pawn your gold necklace to pay my fines. I didn't know that things turned out like that. I feel so fucking useless now. You all had to worry about me all the time. Wei, please buck up for your Os and take care of yourself.
I was still planning for a nice breakfast before I enlist but we had to head to Police Cantonment before that.
Ah I feel so down. Everything just seems so wrong, can I cry?

can someone save me? :(

Sigh, all I can do is pray for everything to turn out fine.
Got no one to blame but myself.

Second last day. Regrets.

Tadah. You guys judge (:




Madeleine Teow
eh, i text yo yesterday, you never reply. my phone went flat. i can't get the receipt cause my acc is combined and i can't do anything without my aunt being there. since it's so diff t get it, nvm, i go pay like again.

and jm used my acc t play poker. you can ask him if you want.

Madeleine Teow
Today at 2:44pm
you always don't reply. and you say i go missing. great. you better hurry up and reply me cause i need t go off soon and my phone can't on.

Loading...
Chun Kit
Today at 2:59pm
LOL. i dont reply? i call your phone from afternoon till midnight its off all the way. if you got some basic responsibilty you could have used your friend's phone and text me right? dont tell me you forgot my number all these crap la.

Madeleine Teow
Today at 3:04pm
i was with a friend whose phone went flat too? you think i'm stupid until idk how t use people's phone t text? not like as if you don't know tt the phone is crazy? i text you right aft i'm done at the bank until my last text at abt 6plus you still didn't reply.

Chun Kit
Today at 3:07pm
wooo fucking coincidental. So i suppose you TWO, are tgt the whole day and without phone, uncontactable at all. and you didnt text me. All i recieve was, 'Yeap Im going to the bank now' and 'Hello Hello'

Madeleine Teow
Today at 3:13pm
eh you know what, you can say all you want. like seriously. you can think about all the possibilities you want and make your mind go wild and get angry over stupid stuffs tt didn't happened. jm using my acc t play poker and you thought tt i was home all along is alr an example. think all you want cause i don't fucking care. i just wanna get the bill thing over and done with.

Chun Kit
Today at 3:17pm
there you go again, with your lies exposed and trying to act like a angry person. yeah i also dont quite give a fuck about your life. you said thursday and you went back on your words and i think that gave me the right to be angry. No?
fuck, who doesnt wants the bill thing to be settled. i will just fuck off from your life forever and ever if you get it done, seriously.

Madeleine Teow
Today at 3:22pm
wow.... now what, you wanna hold a meeting and like ask my friend along and then you will believe. get it straight into your dumb brains tt i don't owe you deep explanations cause you're nobody t me. so why the fuck should i explain everything into details t you? and i said no shit about you caring for my life. yeah man, everyone's telling me not t pay the damn bill like again and wait for m1 t bloody clarify the payment for a last time cause tt was what the lady told me.

Chun Kit
Today at 3:26pm
True, i gotta just take it as the 1001 th madeleine's excuse again for going back on her words. there's no need for explanation. one simple excuse like 'my phone went flat' can solve everything.

Madeleine Teow
Today at 3:32pm
hahahahahahah, go do whatever you want or think about whatever you want. seriously i don't have time t waste and like what, bicker over stuffs like a kid. i got t go alr. and the reason why i am still here is because i waited for your damn reply so tt i can reply in case you might think tt there's another thing t add up t your "madeleine's 1001 excuse". since i can't be contacted until i get a new phone, just send me a fb msg. yeah.... if i don't reply, text jm or qiao. they for sure will be able t contact me within 24 hours.



I guess she aren't gonna do anything about it. Sigh, take it as an expensive lesson kit.

Hi. Haji Lane, Shisha and Pool-ed. I wanna watch movie tomorrow!

And Madeleine Teow is seriously being a bitch. It doesn't pay to be kind. Out of goodwill i signed a mobile line for her and all she does is not paying the fucking 500 dollars bill. 'Claims' that she paid like three weeks ago but until now, i still recieve phone calls that the bill is unsettled. The phone calls are fuckin irritating! I keep getting disturbed when I'm sleeping. Supposingly to pass me the proof that she paid today and all she does is off her phone and remain uncontactable. Yeah, that's what she does best.
You are seriously one of the scariest person I'd ever met. If I could undo one thing that I'd done this year, it would be knowing you.

Pool, Kbox and Phuture. Money like water but who cares when I got like 3 more days of civilian life.

Hey.
I can't believe I'm spending my precious time before enlistment playing facebook games and dota. How boring life can get.
Time for a smoke, anybody?

17 more days.

Today's maggi mee was exceptionally nice.

Had pastamania beef bologonese fusili for lunch yesterday and i think it's super nice. Except that is a lil pricey. Caught conspiracy after that and i swear it's shit.
Wanted to have Gelare today but no khakis, so sad.
I need a new wallet, the wallet is like bleeding and my cards, especially my beloved license is turning orange. Wtf. Saw a damn dope burberry one, online though. K. I need to stop acting like an ASK. Rah. Think i will just save up until i pass out.

Anyone feeling Rebellious tomorrow?

Slept at 10 last night and woke up at 7. Feeling so much better on the last day of work and time is so much easier to pass by. One pack gone today and i think is damn imba. Got mummy a pair of crocs and i hope she can fit, it looks kinda big. No, it's not those typical designs.
Should i save up or go for that pair of DH?

I think i got fetish for girls with denim shorts.

FUCK. i hate being sick.
Day 1 of work was insane with the super heavy flu and insufficient sleep. smoked half a pack and ate like 6 panadols and which doesn't help. Argh, feel like ponning tomorrow. it sucks to be poor :(
and thanks bro for the 4 hours wait.

just when i thought everything is alright, i had to spoil it again by....










popping ruffles in the middle of the night, argh. yes now i'm down with a sorethroat and cough. i think i should quit ruffles seriously. it's like cigarettes, you know it's gonna kill you but you still take it. i fucking hate sorethroat la sigh.

whatsup, celebration yesterday was kind of insane for eugene. first time i see him so drunk. and yeah dbl o sucks if not for the 3 dollars and bvg :D head damn pain , think too long never drink already. and i'm still fucking dehydrated from yesterday. Tuesday, hmmm..

wah songbo, when one is suay is really suay. even television also can spoil. wooooot!

and why cmpb send me two different enlistment dates?

and i need to save up for a new pair of jeans, the whole freaking singapore is wearing nudies.

and this post damn random.

this headache is insane i swear. lol. anyway, me and madeleine are through. so quit asking okay, it's very irritating. though we are seperate entity now, i'm still bothered by the justin incident. i couldnt believe that you can lie so conveniently at spin that day, that you still can act angry about it like we wrongly accused you, that i'm the last among everyone to know the truth. you promised me the most truthful and sincere side of yours but somehow beneath that innocence lies another lie. a lie which killed us.
nah this post doesn't mean anything, i just wanna pen down my thoughts. headache go away, you're killing me lawl.

why on a monday? monday used to be coming my house in the morning, pasta mania for brunch and movie on a early afternoon.

no chunkit, control your emotions, dont let your emotions control you.

sup, a bad day somehow ended in a good way. no electricity till 5, i swear i'm listening to my mp3 lying on my sofa staring at the ceiling. then went spinneli to settle some issues. came home and guess what, i managed to save my comp. feels so good la, it's like seeing some old friend (:

msia trip was good la, but it could have be better. im already missing the carefree life there and the 9 rm cigarettes. everyday wake up eat breakfast buffet, follow by a smoke, even inside air conditioned area, think of where to have fun and spend money. no restriction no boundary. can't wait for another overseas trip with my bubs man. okay la. ckckckck wake up, another 38 days you are going in tekong :(

i feel like a fucking fool sometimes, wished i wasn't so softspoken.

finaly a small getaway from this stupid mundane place.
MALAYSIA HERE I COME~
hope i don't get robbed or hacked to death :D

omg so bored, first time in 7 years i'm living without my computer. actually enlisting early is a good thing. i'm like waking up everyday with no motive, just wanting to kill time with some random activity. and i think laptop damn dope la, can lie on my bed and use but too bad is my brother's. hahaha. so broke laaaaaa arghh

ARGHH someone just kill me la, this is really fucking sian.

what! enlisting on june 13 is damn early la, didnt expect it. anyway my comp died on me. i guess the ram spoilt or something. shes been with me for like 7 years, time to take a rest too. haha. went anchorage for a mini bbq. sorry jimmy i know you are pissed with us for not doing anything. slacked at somewhere near my house cause its too early to be at home on a friday night la. k head damn pain, ciaos.

heyyyyy my blog aint dead man, just damn lazy. i made my passport yeah baby. i dont know why but im feeling the satisfaction you get from retail therapy. never knew passport can make me feel so high. LOL. i am so looking forward to msia trip la. life now is damn boring please. job is so hard to find la, been sending dozens of resume but none worked. lol. kayyy im uber tired now. but got some cravings for ruffles. should i head to cheers now, or not.

i think its damn hard to strike a balance between family and friends/rs. its damn hard to know what you want to do in life but yet doing another. its damn hard to not envy others of what you don't have.

unborn isnt really that nice, unlike detroit metal city. go catch it if you haven't, i think it's one of the best movie so far. hit rebel, it's like for once mad isn't drunk and is good! i wanna do the Matt dance in the club but abit paiseh, JM next time do with me. lol. anyway this is a really nice song, enjoy (:

hello, yesterday was good. balled from four to ten. i almost died i swear. lol. stupid jm made me brought one soccer ball and one basketball back home. xiasuay-ed for that 5 minutes. hahaha. went home to have dinner and headed to dw's house. dont know why but i think im starting to hate alcohol. i felt so disgusted upon the first sip, LOL. anyway we still drank while playing 3 ppl daidee. dw was the first to tap out. hahaha. i fell asleep within minutes upon lying on my bed. i think this the only good thing about alcohol.
called ben sherman and they said they arent hiring, recruit agencies arent calling back. damn. even so, i didnt regret quitting spin (:
what should i do tonight, everything needs money man

fucking bored. malboro does wonders in times like this. i am quite disturbed at how an ask spends and people around me. maybe we really are from different worlds. for once, horoscope made some sense.

we've been waiting for this day for three damn years. one less burden off my mind. not that the next phase of life excites me but anyway, dropped by an agency in hunt for a job. the guy sounds promising so please dont disappoint us.
caught street fighter and it was fucking boring please. what can you expect from yy's recommendation. LOL. i almost fell asleep again and 2009 directors should buck up. i've been watching crap shows since the start of the year.
chilled at the sky park or the whatever it is called rooftop with a can of beer. i seriously hate beer and i swear i was going to puke.
st james' music was good, a mixture of rnb and electro, but the crowd isn't too good ah. and sorry bros, spoilt yall night. luckily we returned to the dancefloor and enjoyed the last hour of dance. hahaha.
ok hair is dried and its raining wooooo. should be having a good night sleep (:

LC0713 COMMUNICATION SKILLS FOR BUSINESS B
BA0190 TRANSPORT MANAGEMENT (SEA) C
BA0186 OPERATIONS MANAGEMENT C
BA064Z BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT C
BA0282 LAW OF INTERNATIONAL TRADE C
BA0286 INTRODUCTION TO PSYCHOLOGY C+

Semester GPA: 2.18
Cumulative GPA: 1.721

DIPLOMA AWARDED

woooooooooooooooo (:

it has been quite sometime since we had a late night msn conversation. kinda miss those times. anyway, being a stay home kid isn't a bad thing afterall. watch cable tv, read newspapers (YET TO), surf forums and eating home cooked dinner.

i feel damn sad when i return home in the morning and see the dinner mom spent hours cooking thats left on the table for me, when i flaunt money like water and they scrimp and save every single cent, when dad wears a twenty dollars jeans and i wore a pair that costs three hundred, when i think how close me and my brother and my cousins used to be when we were young and we're so distant now, when i failed to meet their expectation and they can do nothing but resent, when i see a girl cry but can't help and standing there watching her. i wished life was as simple as it was back then when happiness meant mum and dad were bringing us to mac hotcakes breakfast on a sunday morning.

its time to get back my life in shape!
smoke less run more club less work more (:

this is rare,
it's raining so heavily and its a late afternoon and i'm rather tired but i can't sleep. while most of the times when i'm outside wishing i was lying on my bed, i felt like going out today. i feel so incapable when i cant even afford a packet of cigarettes to ease my mind. i realised theres so much 'i' in the post.
Anyway, i think working at cathay with a laptop is so much better than at heeren. and should i change to livejournal. and i need to go for a run!

life after exams has been good. clubbed followed by my long time no touch sports. received letter from cmpb to inform that i'm in Pes BL1 which means i have to go for napfa. damnnn.
caught 'hes just not into you' yesterday and i think it's one of the better love show. rebel-ed today and it was exceptionally pack. wasn't fun but interesting, cause i saw alot of things. the group of highly protected virgins, botak guy that she kissed and the imba couple. HAHAHA. ok time to sleep, work tomorrow at cathay. and recruit express faster hit me up with another job. bloooooody broke.

today is another failed to study day, even brought my books out man. went town to get my key ring but it wasnt as nice as i expected geeeez
ok i gotta finish the whole module in one day alone tomorrow
and im so broke, left $50. stay home week wooooooo

just came back from chong pang tau huay, satisfaction.
i just realised my next two papers are 60%, ah kay ah and i can't get down studying sia, nvm. tomorrow 5 hours at cathay SURE study. i am going to finish whole of law and half of tms. cant wait for my key ring, hope it will be nice cause its the only thing im looking forward to for this week.

haalooo, psychology paper was insanely difficult. theres no point studying the notes because the questions doesnt come from there. out of fifty questions i only got confidence in like five. but whatever la, theres nothing i can do. haha. and i think i damn power, i woke up at 8 pm only to start studying for tomorrows paper. then went down for some lepak session till now. woooooooooooooo sian.

so yesterday was bd's final presentation. finally freed from it. hope i didnt screw it up. after that went amk s11 eat. i swear the food got something wrong, my stomach feel damn uncomfortable throughout the entire day. jm lost his wallet again, omg. we just bought for him a month ago. quite expensive okay! hahaha. went home to sleep cause i only slept 4 hours the previous day. ate at fish manhattan. actually quite nice, but the bloody s11 rice make me can't enjoy. lol. rebel-ed. two bottles of vodka i only drank one cup. LOL. but then wah, yesterday quite gone. thanks to mad, i only managed to sleep when i reached home at 12 pm. wake up, sleep again and wake up to go euji house, then chong pang tau huay.

psychology test tomorrow, and i havent even study anything yet. all the powerpoint slides are blanks. think just have to go there and try luck. wah damn sianz. think i this whole month dont wanna go out already. study as well as save some money and smoke less cause i realised my fingers damn yellow. don't ask me out for movie or club until my exams are over cause this is stay home february.

to my disappointment, i thought roaring queen was very pretty, sigh.

i havent been attending school since last wednesday, and i swear i will go tomorrow. at least for the 1 pm lesson. february is a fucking busy month with all the projects due this week and semestral exams.thus LIT fri CSB sat BD. woooooo. just hope that i can survive and make it through.

so we caught another anne hathaway show. we were late for 15 minutes due to the slow service at long john and i THINK the first 15 minutes was actually the gist of the movie. LOL. its a not bad show though some of my friends actually fell asleep. and LJS DAMN NICE, the new combo. one fish one chicken add fries add cheese and upsize lemon tee but too bad its not filling.

cant wait for life after exams. cant wait for saturdays celebration. cant wait for money to drop from the sky. bye.

I was a little girl alone in my little world who dreamed of a little home for me.
I played pretend between the trees, and fed my houseguests bark and leaves, and laughed in my pretty bed of green.

I had a dream
That I could fly from the highest swing.
I had a dream.

Long walks in the dark through woods grown behind the park, I asked God who I'm supposed to be.
The stars smiled down on me, God answered in silent reverie. I said a prayer and fell asleep.

I had a dream
That I could fly from the highest tree.
I had a dream.

Now I'm old and feeling grey. I don't know what's left to say about this life I'm willing to leave.
I lived it full and I lived it well, there's many tales I've lived to tell. I'm ready now, I'm ready now, I'm ready now to fly from the highest wing.

I had a dream.

happy chinese new year!

reunion dinner was fabulous,
but it kinda sadden me seeing people aged, passing by sites that could have brought back lots of memories but apparently the buildings wasn't there. don't know is it me but feeling that festive season is getting more mundane as years pass. maybe i've grown up, maybe..

went cmpb for medical checkup,
pes D cause i said i had knee problem.
pending, hope i doesn't need to go back there again.

bought quite a few tops for cny already,
just as i was ready to order my nudies, there's no stock. fuck man.
and i need another pair of sneakers. then think this whole year no need buy clothes already.

funny ah,
dozed off on the way to school
dozed off during lesson
decided to skip second lesson to sleep at home
dozed off on the way back home
reach home lie on bed, CAN'T SLEEP.
WTF.
ok gotta go work soon bye.

lost to the demon within once again

lepak.
dixie. rebel.
town. work.
school. work. red cliff 2.

tomorrow is a long day, 9 am - 10 pm. i seriously detest school. woooo

happy 2009! (:

hope this year won't be as shitty as the previous. gonna be a very different year cause i'm graduating and goin ns! okay so countdown was spent at dewei house steamboat. was so much better than hitting clubs or town. puking on day two of a new year doesnt seems very promising. looking back, this my second time puking, first was on 18th birthday. day three was late night mahjong and i finally won some money after so long of losing streak. day four is spent balling. ah, body is failing me. time to train, i don't want enlist earlier man.

time flies, people come people go. how i wish my entire life could have been videoed and watch repeatedly as my memories fail me. alrights, school and work tomorrow. a picture to end the post with (: