Overheard

GINGER (to Sophie and Emma): Who wants to bring me some nail polish?
SOPHIE: Who wants to bring ME some nail polish?

Overheard

Emma just walked into the kitchen with a concerned look on her face and her hand on her neck, and said:

"Mom, Dad, I think my heart moved. I tried to feel it on my chest but I can only feel it in my neck."

Overheard

GINGER: Aack! There's mold on the lettuce!
SOPHIE: It wasn't me!

Overheard

The kids had to get H1N1 vaccines at school today. We thought they were going to get the mist, but Ethan was given a shot.

ETHAN: When they tried to give me the shot I pulled my arm away and they told me to think happy thoughts. But all I could think of was how I might die or end up in the hospital.

In the end, he was brave. Many of the kids cried, including one of his friends who is otherwise very tough, but who claims to suffer from "shotphobia". A defining day for the third graders.

Overheard

SOPHIE: I'munna get a pet whale. They don't bite.

I had a ball. Then I lost it.

While we were posting this video, we ran across an old one that is worth a second look. Ethan and Andrew almost hurt themselves they were laughing so hard watching it.

Fashion

Tonight we went to a baptism at church, so we had to get dressed up. I told the boys: NO JEANS. So they went up to their room and sat on the floor until it was time to go, and then they "decided" to get dressed (after some "gentle" "prompting" from their parents). Andrew put on: a red striped polo shirt and JEANS.

Andrew, no jeans. You need to change.

So while the rest of us were downstairs going through the shoe-putting-on ceremony, Andrew came down the stairs, without jeans. He was wearing: his red striped polo shirt, turquoise and white plaid shorts, and black socks. Ethan said: What. Are. You. Doing.  And then Ethan started laughing through his nose.

Andrew said: What.

I said: Andrew, you can't wear shorts to a baptism.

What? Why not?  You SAID NO JEANS.

(He was totally serious, and completely oblivious to 1) why we can't wear short pants to a solemn occasion and 2) why red-and-white stripes and turquoise plaid don't work.)


So we waited in the car while Andrew put on some khaki pants. It wasn't until we got out of the car at church that we realized the khaki pants only went halfway down his calves. Ginger noticed Ethan's extraordinarily baggy pants, and recognized immediately they were wearing each others' pants.

Go into the nursery, she said, and switch pants.

What? Take our pants off in church?

Yes.

But the nursery was dark! So I went in with them, turned on the light and held the door so no one could come in. Ethan took an extra long time unbuttoning his pants so Andrew had to stand in the room in his underwear and skinny legs, watching the door nervously, for a long time.  But they made the switch and all was well.

The end.

Overheard

In church each week Sophie's class sings a song about a wise man, a foolish man, and houses built on rock and sand.

The teachers must have gone into a deeper explanation last Sunday, because on Friday, Sophie came to me and said: "My teacher says we should build a rock on Jesus Christ."

"Well," I said, "we should build our house upon the rock of Christ."

Then she made a very concerned face--she had obviously been thinking about this for some time--and said, "But if we put a rock on him he will die!"

Symbolism and three-year olds don't mix.

Overheard

EMMA: Dad. I know how to spell 'dead.' D-E-D.
ME: Nope. Close.
EMMA: D-E-D-E?
ME: Nope. D-E-A-D.
EMMA: Ooh! I know how to spell 'bed.' B-E-A-D.
ME: Nope. B-E-D.
EMMA: But they rhyme?
ME: It's not fair, is it.

3, 2, 1...

Post It 2

Emma got a hold of a pad of post-it notes the other day.

Post it

Overheard

Sophie just came into my office and asked, "How do you spell chic?"

Boo-wha. Hahaaaa.

Once again, Halloween is the time of year when the differences between boys and girls are made plain.

Two zombies, a "China doll" and Snow White. Or, snails and puppy dog tails, sugar and spice.

Andrew's "barfkin." All of our pumpkins grew in the backyard this year. We cut this one's life short before it had a chance to turn orange. Since it was green, Andrew thought of a perfect design. It was actually rotten, and by the time we finished carving it we all felt like "barfkins". What we do for art.

We ran out of candy at our door within an hour. But you're welcome to come take some of the kids' loot. They all got a ridiculous amount of candy, enough to last Emma and Andrew until Christmas, or Ethan and Sophie until tomorrow night.

They were so excited for today. Emma asked me repeatedly this morning if I could believe that it was actually, finally, really, truly Halloween.

Next year Ethan wants to be a hobo. We're looking forward to seeing how he puts that one together, and what it actually means in his mind. He says the school bus passes by a group of hobos every morning. He sees them out the window, near the municipal water offices, standing by their motorcycles. (Waiting to rumble with eskimos, no doubt.)

Time for Christmas music.

The crepes are in hee-uh.

Where?

Right hee-uh.