got back chemistry and biology papers today. passed both. nono, i'm not trying to boast here or anything but i'm just thankful to God for being faithful. Majority of the people failed and i expected to fail. and i don't think i studied as hard as other people. i'm sad, because seeing all my friends so sad due to their results, makes me sad as well. its not like they've never put in effort. i know they studied. i know they put in effort.
but what else can i say. i just hope that they'll be ok and cheer up. its not the end of the world yet. there's still other papers to go, and whats more, this is only mid years. there's still time to catch up.
cheer up guys (:
don't cry over spilt milk. just have to keep going on and go towards our ultimate goal - A's.

love mg is tomorrow. looking forward to going back to mgs. looking forward to meet my friends and maybe teachers?haha.

this week passed pretty fast. tomorrow is a friday already..hmm..although lessons seem kinda slow though.
monday met lionel at kap. miss kap. heh. studied with him, made him memorise his recipes. i did some work too,..nono, one work sheet only.

yesterday after school went for lunch at kfc with xy, nic, mq, dianah, sr. then went back to school to do the presents and plan for sunday.

havent really been doing anything these few days, but there's alot to do.
HRC, SGC, homew0rk, studies...realised there's not enough time to finish the syllabus if we dont start studying now.

my grandma (dad's side) is in hospital. just got admitted today morning. don't know whats wrong. just hope everything will be ok.

anyway, life still goes on...

finally! there's only one more paper left tomorrow. its been a tiring week. having to come back home straight after school after papers everyday and studying. ok la, i didnt really study alot these few days, but its been draining. nervous, cannot sleep, thinking. i'm going to be so glad when bio is over tomorrow. dont feel like studying already. but i know i have to..after i blog. so many things that i still dont know. i just hope the paper wont be hard, like math and chem mcq. math was horrible. didnt expect it to be so hard. dont know whether the paper is really hard or its just me or us or our school or i dunno! but the tys is like so much easier. dunno man.

looking forward to seoul garden with my classmates after school tomorrow(: finally can go out and relax.
ohyes, and i so want to run and exercise. feel so unfit and fat and disgusting. all i've been doing is sit, eat, study, sleep..haha.

one day of holiday before school starts on monday. its going to be a long long term but i think time will fly. study again? hmm..haiz. haha. will have a break first before gearing up again.

miss my sister. she's at childrens camp. miss her. miss her disturbing me. miss disturbing her when i'm bored. heh.

MILK run coming soon. next sun. looking forward to it.

back to my bio notes:(

unspoken words
and i hope it wont hurt as much

know i'm supposed to be asleep at this time, but can't get to sleep. gp paper later. starts at 8am. i'm scared. don't know what to expect. how the heck does one study for gp? haiz. but i feel so unprepared going into the exam hall without anything in my head.

today made me think alot. the feeling sucks. it sucks when you're all preoccupied with thoughts and you can't seem to concentrate when studying. was practically stoning at my notes the whole day. but i can't help it.
why did everything become like that? what is wrong with me...

argh! go sleep go sleep. sigh. i hope the paper will be ok.


themoreiknowthemoreihatemyself

and the safest place is still my bed, by myself, with the music blasting at my ears. and looking as if i'm studying but i'm stoning at my notes. people talk,scold, nag, but i cant hear or rather, i can pretend not to hear.

just let me live in my own world

and so, i've been stuck at home these few days. trying to study, but always get distracted. did get some stuff done, which is good. tuition yesterday was great, finally cleared everything for integration(:

reaction kinetics now. disgusting topic. ohwells, it doesnt seem that hard. haven't really done anything today though. did physical geog, read through marianne chong's textbook. heh. its like sec 4 stuff, but there's like so much more info than our notes now.

1 more day left to study..dont even know whether i'm done or whatever. ohwells, just study, then see how.
jiayou everybody who's studying and feeling stressed!(:

had a weird dream 2 nights ago. dreamt that there was this bunch of disgusting insects in my room.(like leeches) and they can jump, fly and everything! was trying to get rid of them, but was so terrified of them. disgusting dream. ohwells. haha

back to reaction kinetics...

cant wait for everything to be over

God create in me a broken and contrite heart. I want to be submitted to you

supposed to be studying, but i'm here blogging.
STUDY la! feel so slack, feel like i've got a lot more to cover, but can't be bothered. argh. but i'm scared. scared that if i don't do well then i think my remaining few more months of school will be filled with more and more extra lessons and consultations. don't want that. ABIGAIL CHAN! STUDY!
4 more days till exam starts.

slacked my whole weekend away. saturday had tuition in the morning then went to my grandma's place after that. slacked, talked, played, swam, watch tv...felt good to be swimming and exercising again. played ball in the water with my cousins. it was tiring man, having to swim up and down to attack and to defend. but it was fun. sunday went to sell food in the morning then had yc then stayed back to watch captains ball.
monday went to bianca's house. studied abit, but doesnt seem like alot, but at least i did stuff. nathan came over for lunch, then left again. yes, nice maggi bianca!(: then lionel came after school. went for dinner at holland v, talked...haha. went back to her house to watch the zodiac. nono, not zodiac. its THE zodiac. then left. yesterday stayed home, then lionel came over after his test. ate lunch and dinner at my place. i studied abit then fell asleep. then watch tv....
yes, so i havent been studying much. so must study today, somemore, there's nobody at home..suprisingly. good good. just hope i dont fall asleep.

cant wait for exam to be over. then i wanna play play play and watch movies and go out...

ok, but for now, going off to study

don't feel like sleeping, so i'm here blogging.
took away my tagboard. feel like changing url too.
studied with shurong and dianah today at shurong's house. thanks you both(: was feeling down (dont think yr noticed) but thanks for just being there.

there's still so many topics to cover. ohwells. 1 more week. jiayou everyone!

tuition and grandma's house tomorrow. plus swimming too? wanna exercise. feel so disgustingly unfit.

had 2 dreams last night, even though i slept for only 2 hours plus.
dreamt that was having some exam, then was late. then the lift took super long and everybody was delaying the lift. ran to take a cab, but dont know how come, there were people in the cab with me. everybody was nice and they decided to let me rush to school first. however there was a jam. was super scared and stressed and started crying. all i know was that i remember feeling very stressed. then i woke up. weird and scary.
then fell back asleep and dreamt again. this time was in mgs, our sec 4 class room. mr yeo was having math extra lesson. remember seeing leemey, jia, laura, clara, yinling, candice, cynthia. cant remember what happened. but it sure brings back memories. nice memories.

promise i'll try.

trust
i'm sorry for everything. but i love you
hope everything is ok after we talked

insignificance
insecurities


i still hope you still do...

after what happened, gives me a completely different mindset about THEM. made it worse. i'm afraid and weary about THEM.
and i thought....argh shucks.

been donkey years since i've blogged. dont think i should blog though. should either be sleeping or studying, but dont feel like doing either.

its the 2nd week of the hols. and i have no idea what i've been doing. exam is in 10 days? shucks.
been studying, but doesnt feel like i've done or covered alot. sigh. i'm so tired. i want to play, want to have fun, want to go out, want to watch movie, want to slack....argh. everyday is just work work work and more work. now, even if i go out, i would feel so guilty. haiya, STUDY LA!

now i know i'm not the only one feeling that way.
what can we do right. ohwells.


boy, i miss jyc camps. they're having jyc camp now. keep on thinking and remembering the times that we had in the old church. miss it. hope everybody is having fun

guess things will never be the same again


This thing has been ringing in my head the past few days - ' love God, love His people '
oh how easy it sounds, but its not. trying..but...haiz. God change my attitude

spent the whole day at bianca's house today. reached around 930. started studying, then met nathan at holland v for lunch. After lunch we went back to her house to study till 8. went out for dinner then came back. supposed to continue studying, but didnt feel like. so we ended up talking and watching jarhead. then went home. studying drains energy man.
thanks you two!(:

tomorrow meeting sinyu at 6th ave. studying again.

haha my life is so boring