maybe i shouldnt have ponned school. heard mum waking me up. heard her scolding me. didnt want to go school. pretended that i was asleep. dad scolded me too. haiz. its all my fault.

didnt want to go to school because of 2.4. didnt want to run. scared of expectations. scared i couldnt meet it. i know when i'm stressed i cannot run. had a bad dream about 2.4 before. dreamt that a teacher scolded me for my lousy timing. haiz.
sorry dianah and sr. ps you guys.

didnt want to go to school because i wanted to stay home to complete my work. i'm lagging behind. sigh.

maybe i'm just stressed. then will do weird things. stupid la.

dont want another round of scolding when my mum gets home. haiz



anyways. the weekend was fun. went to east coast to support the biathlon people. went shopping for presents. went back to sr's house to watch movies..watched the holiday and sr and xy slept first. then dianah and i watch john tucker must die. fell asleep half way. haha. dianah is the sole survivor. heh. woke up for the mizuno run. was fun but the slope was disgusting. heh. well done to all who ran!(: went vivo to eat and then went bras basah. went church then went out to eat with lionel. headed home after that.

which now leaves me with tons of homework.

anyways. photos from my dad's birthday.










s
























sigh.parentswillneverunderstand.hatemyself

thanks for all the tags(:

today is going to be a fun day. still got time before going to meet xy, dianah and sr. staying over at sr's housing because mizuno run is at 630am on sun. so decided to stay over. then going down to east coast to support meiqi and jenn for biathlon. and play i guess. haha. all the best for the biathlon!(:

bio test and chem test was disgusting. hope i dont fail bio. i think i'll fail chem. stupid calculations. ohwells.

anyways. nationals are over. feels weird because there's no more trainings and i miss it. seriously! because it feels like i'm so free and its time to study.

cant believe next week is wk 6 already. after this term is our exam already. argh. and like i don't feel like studying. feel the urgency, but but haiz. dont want to study. when somebody(cant remember who) suddenly said next wk is week 6, i was panicking. its so fast. and its like just one day after one day just passed like that. what have i been doing? argh

anyway, went for cell yesterday. first time i stepped into the jyc room.
anyway, thank you lionel for making me come. thank you.
thank you reg for your tag.

thank you trackists for being there for me always and the fun that we always have.

shall go study abit before leaving house.


problems seem so normal because everybody is facing it too.

did the colourgenics test.

You are constantly hoping that your good fellowship and attitude and your 'love for your fellow man (or women)' will give you peace of mind. You need people - people around you to care for you and to show you that they care. It is this hope that keeps you going, the hope that makes you the type of person that indeed you are. Your own need for approval seemingly makes you always ready to help others and in exchange you seek love, warmth and understanding. You will always listen to others and you are open to new ideas which hopefully will prove fruitful and interesting.

You are totally dissatisfied with your present situation. Matters are not going right for you and you are seeking a means of escape. Your mental state of mind necessitates that you need to change your thinking patterns. Remember, if one particular modus operandi doesn't seem to work, then try something different.


The situation at this time is one of considerable distress. You feel trapped and you are looking for some way out. You can find solace in the arms of someone who cares so long as there is no long-term emotional involvement.

You are experiencing considerable stress which is essentially the result of on going rejection and hostility. You are in the unpleasant position where offers of trust, affection and understanding are being withheld and you are being treaded with a degrading lack of consideration. You feel that you are being denied the appreciation that you deserve, which is essential to your well-being and self-esteem, but you have to face up to the situation because as matters stand at this time there is little that you can do about it - you feel that you are getting nowhere and the continuous struggle is a lonely one: all difficulties and no encouragement. Whatever you try to say or do is met with continuous hostility and no matter how much you protest you are consistently misunderstood. You need to escape from the situation but you are so perplexed that you cannot find the strength of mind to make the necessary decision.

Matters are not all that they would appear to be and you are critical of the existing conditions which you feel are confused and disorganised. You are therefore looking for a modus operendi which will simplify the situation so that you will be able to see the 'trees in the woods'.


pw results is disgusting. thought my group did much better but i guess just accept it because there's nothing we can do about it.
training tomorrow.
math extra lesson on mon
bio test on tues
cross country nationals on wed
gp extra lesson on thurs
chem test on fri
sucks man. ohwells.

happy for math test. from S to A. guess more practice helps.
shurong: dont be disappointed about your math. can one. need practice, i'll practice with you

lionel: congrats on getting a job


hate whatever i'm in now. but haiz.

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY LAOGONG! miss you.

TIO SUMMON!
xy, this is specially for you. heh
haha. had a great time today. thanks shurong, dianah, xinyun. thanks for listening to me. thanks for such a happy time. thanks for taking all the stress away during that few hours.

today ran during 1 hour break. wow the run was tiring. duno why. i think its the weather. super hot. and somemore my ankle hurt. ohwells. 5 items tomorrow. stupid broad jump.ohwells

dont feel like studying or doing work. sigh.


sigh.its ok.itsjustme.thefeelingsucks.nothing.itsok.whyamisobotheredanyway.sigh



notlookingforwardtosundays

trackists sentosa outing on friday(:
thanks dianah and nic for planning the race(:
thanks to all those who turned up and made everything so fun(:

burnt, tired, but had so so much fun.
celebrated xy and sr's birthday in advanced, with a yummy cookie cake and a fun time of dirtying each other.
all of us got burnt.

dinner at harbour front. then went to eat ben and jerry's ice cream.
had girls talk. thanks for sharing(:
and thanks sr for the ride home. (:

thank you trackists for the wonderful time.

got in for nationals. but i really cant wait for it to end, because then can concentrate on studying. realised training takes up a whole lot of time.

chem spa and math test on monday.

i know i need to study, because everybody is studying alot already. haiz.

dont think i should blog such stuff next time. forget it.

this week is going to be a crazy week.
and its just the 3rd week of school.
i want the week to pass faster, but that means it'll be closer to exams.

trainings and more trainings. ohwells. a few more weeks left.
17 more days to nationals.
did slope training at turf city on sat. did 8 sets of the slope. tiring slope. long and hard to run. will learn to love the slope. after training went to church to meet lionel. went out for lunch with lionel and my dad. went back to church to bathe, then studied till around 7 plus.
sorry i know i upset you
then watched the liverpool-arsenal match at some coffee shop with lionel and my dad. then went home.


thanks to those who've asked about me. thanks.
lionel, andy, reg, jc,shurong: thanks for the tag. appreciate it.




lost the passion.
lost the will




whats the point in going back.
what difference does it make
its the same weei after week


hate this mess

such an idiot